How to be a "Man"

[ScoobySnax]

What's going on, fellas. Let me start out by saying this may be the most pathetic post I've ever made. I feel so damn ashamed.

Growing up, my father wasn't around and I was primarily raised by women (mom, grandmother etc). So naturally, I didn't get to learn most of the things that kids get to learn from their dads like changing a tire, changing oil, handling tools, and other things that men should be able to do.

Now I'm a 27 year old husband that still lacks in these areas and it's starting to bother me a lot. If my wife catches a flat, I feel like she should be able to call me and I handle it. I'm even more afraid because I don't want this cycle to continue when I have a son of my own. I want him to grow up and learn the ways a man should operate. How can I teach him right, if I'm clueless myself.

Is there anything that can be done this late in the game? Any help here is appreciated. If you got jokes, cool. I've heard them all anyway.

[Blzer]

Don't worry, I'm 23 years old and the same way. I have to start working the BBQ sooner or later as well.

If all else fails, YouTube is your best friend. They have tutorials on everything.

[Mabster]

At this point if you don't have a friend that can teach you anything might have to spend some time and money to learn some of the skills you think you should have.

Maybe look into any community colleges around you. Most of them have shop classes where you can learn some tool skills, intro electrical classes to teach the basics of simple wiring and even car classes that will teach you how to change oil to your own tune up etc.

In California community colleges cost $26 per unit and most classes are 3-4 units. $100 well spent if you're really worried about this kind of thing.


Edit: Blzer! Youtube is a great idea!

Also, you don't have to wait for a flat tire to happen to go and practice changing a tire. Doing it in your own driveway annd just becoming familiar with the jack and were to put it on the car will save you some headache when/if the time comes and you're trying to do it on the side of the road.

[Buckeyes_Doc]

I know how you feel. My dad was around when I grew up and is a great father, but his dad wasn't around so he couldn't teach me things like changing a tire or others things boys usually learn from their father.

I'm 23 and have never changed my oil in my life. I've never had a flat tire (knock on wood) but if I do or my wife does I wouldn't have a clue what to do.

I use to suck at using tools and assembling things, then I got married and moved into an apartment with my wife. I felt embarrassed at first at my lack of skills putting our stuff together but it made for some funny moments. Eventually I learned and I'm a lot better at handling tools.

Good advice from Blzer. I've used Youtube tutorials and ehow.com on many things.

Edit: Funny story. I saw a commercial a couple months ago about a convention for women teaching them basic auto skills like changing oil, tire, etc. I immediately thought, is there a class for guys like me lol.

[Madman55]

Quote: Originally Posted by Buckeyes_Doc

I know how you feel. My dad was around when I grew up and is a great father, but his dad wasn't around so he couldn't teach me things like changing a tire or others things boys usually learn from their father. I'm 23 and have never changed my oil in my life. I've never had a flat tire (knock on wood) but if I do or my wife does I wouldn't have a clue what to do. I use to suck at using tools and assembling things, then I got married and moved into an apartment with my life. I felt embarrassed at first at my lack of skills putting our stuff together but it made for some funny moments. Eventually I learned and I'm a lot better at handling tools. Good advice from Blzer. I've used Youtube tutorials and ehow.com on many things.

I ran into this problem. Driving home from work I got a flat, and I had absolutely no idea how to change it, so I called my dad. It would've taken him about 30 mins to get there, but I was gonna wait. Luckily somebody was nice enough to stop and help me and I was on my way much sooner. It's something I should practice doing, my only problem was just using the jack which seemed to be really awkward to use.

[dcal]

Keep your head up man. Its easy to get down on yourself and let things snowball. Its harder to step up for your family when that happens. I can give you a little advice on the "handy man" type stuff. In the past I have not been particularly handy but have since learned to build a computer, repair an irrigation system, take apart and re-assemble a toilet, fix leaking sinks, and other stuff I previously did not know how to do.

How? Promise not to laugh..............Youtube. Everything mentioned above and more I searched on Youtube and found multiple tutorials on how to do things. You will learn as you encounter new things and before you know it that stuff will no longer be an issue. You just have to be willing to learn it and dont get discouraged when the first couple tries on something takes long.

I hope that helps. It just covers a small portion but if I can learn some of these things anyone can.

[Gotmadskillzson]

Youtube it up. Everybody had to learn SOME WAY. No shame in learning from Youtube.

I learned how to do damn near everything from either my dad or from off the streets. My wife knows to how over haul a motorcyle, tune cars, tune a riding lawn mower and knows how to drive damn near every vehicle like a pro, including big rigs, BUT she don't know that much about computers.

Life is a great teacher.

[Mjphillips]

Great thread. My church decided to do a help session for men that covered these types of things. Tools, flats, handle a weed eater, household and car repairs and even tying a tie.

Youtube is a great tool imo. Don't feel ashamed for not knowing. How can you be considering your upbringing. I have every confidence you can get up to speed on the things you lack but it's up to you to make the effort. In a way, you have people depending on you. Be the man, Sir.

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