rudyjuly2's Blog
Is the Universe a Friendly Place?
Dr. Peter Jensen talked about a lot of things, many of which can help your personal life. He talked about eliminating stress. He talked about how to get the most out of your abilities. He talked about learning more about yourself. Einstein once asked the question, “Is the universe a friendly place?” The truth is that each of us will answer this question differently. Some will say yes, others no and some maybe. There is no wrong answer. You just have to know how you answer it and how that can affect your decision making. Peter joked that his wife asked him, “Why are you always so defensive when students question you?” He replied, “I’m not being defensive!” Knowing that you may behave like this can help you make the changes necessary to improve. A person can’t change from being a negative person to a positive person. But if you truly recognize the areas that you are weak in, you can adjust.
Managing Stress
There are many ways to deal with stress. One of the best ways to deal with it is only worrying about the things we can control. Worrying about things we can’t control does no good. Peter joked that we shouldn’t worry about the problems in this world. His mother-in-law does that for everyone. The old expression, "Lord grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference” is a truly great one.
The other ways to deal with stress are to maintain relationships and discuss our problems. Women live at least five years longer than men. And a significant portion of that is due to men’s inability to discuss their problems and deal with stress. Studies have shown that the best support group for a cancer patient is other cancer patients. Shocking! Talking with people that can understand your problems is a tremendous benefit.
The Power of Visualization
People do not realize the power of visualization. It can have a significantly positive or negative affect on your body and your ability to deal with adversity. Constantly beating yourself up over mistakes only creates more stress and problems. There was a study where athletes had their brain patterns analyzed when committing a mistake. They studied the neurological affects from a physical error and then had the athlete visualize the same mistake. They found it had the same effect on the body. So when an infielder boots a ground ball and then relives it in his head another four times, he’s actually committed that error five times. He needs to let it go much like a cornerback who got beat on a touchdown pass. Noted speaker Ben Zander has stated that after every mistake we should say, “How fascinating!” We learn through mistakes. Taking risks and aspiring to be great are positive things so don’t dwell on the screw-ups.
A post-Olympic study of Canadian athletes showed clearly that those who did their personal best at the 1984 Olympics used mental imagery two and a half to three times as frequently as those who did not perform up to their expectations. The four minute mile was once a psychological barrier. Nobody thought it was possible until Roger Bannister did it in 1954. But as soon as he did, that barrier was broken. Within 46 days someone else broke four minutes. By the end of 1957, 16 runners had done it. You can’t do it if you can’t imagine yourself doing it.
Change Your Perspective
Sometimes we allow ourselves to get frustrated. We get angry or stressed and our body and mind tenses up. When our adrenaline kicks in, our mind can lose the ability to process a lot of information. Ever got into a heated argument with someone and minutes later wished you could have remembered some key points that seemed to go blank in your mind? It’s because you were too hyped up to process things properly. There are times when we need adrenaline to have key focus and there are other times where we need to use techniques such as breathing or refocusing to regain our composure so we can perform at a high level.
Dr. Peter Jensen told a good joke.
One day a mother was driving her seven year old daughter to school. The daughter turned to the mom and asked, “Where are all the bastards mommy? I don’t see any bastards.” The mother replied, “They only come out when your father drives.”
The father viewed every driver on the road as an annoyance which raised his stress level. The mother chose to remain calm. Instead of allowing some things to annoy us, we need to relax and refocus. Allow ourselves to become an observer rather than just viewing a tough situation in a first person perspective. “Act as if” you know what you are doing. Some guys have a tough time approaching girls as a teenager. When approaching a girl you can act like the no-confidence dork you feel like. Or you can act as if you are cool like some other guys you have seen. Act as though you know what you are doing. Visualize success. After winning a major Johnny Miller once said that it wasn’t just him that won it. Whenever he was looking at a tough shot, he visualized another great golfer making a similar shot from memory. Everyone gets nervous. You are not your feelings. Even though you may be nervous, you don’t have to act like it or let it govern your actions.
How We Deal with Challenges
When Bell was declared a monopoly and broken up into smaller companies, many middle management employees had their livelihoods threatened. A total of 207 of these managers were studied over the course of seven years to see how they handled it. They examined the differences between those that ended up getting promoted and being successful versus those that languished behind. They found the floundering managers had seven times the amount of sick time used as the successful ones. This wasn’t a case of the lousy employees dogging it. This was an example of how negative energy and worrying actually affects your physical well being. The mind and body are connected.
When faced with challenges, you can choose regressive coping or transformational coping. Regressive coping is negative. “Why me?” “Why can’t it go back to the way it was?” These types of questions do not help deal with your problems. The successful managers took a more positive attitude. “What skills do I need to learn to be successful?” “How can I use this opportunity to better myself?” We can choose how we deal with challenges.
Conclusion
This experience was great. Dr. Peter Jensen told quite a few good stories and provided some great examples of how we can challenge ourselves to better deal with the issues we face. Hopefully some of these comments will be useful for anyone struggling with stress or problems either on the court or off of it.
# 2
rudyjuly2 @ Nov 18
I forgot some other stuff. He talked about setting goals and how it's better to have a goal push you rather towards something. Rick Hansen (wheelchair guy who went around the world) kept thinking about getting on the Great Wall of China. That was his motivation to get there. And once he was there he thought about coming back home.
Not every person is capable of visualization. Only about 80% of us can. The rest either can't do it or can't do it well.
He had a lot of funny stories and talked about certain athletes. One of the best speakers I've heard in a long time. He has a book out although I haven't read it.
Not every person is capable of visualization. Only about 80% of us can. The rest either can't do it or can't do it well.
He had a lot of funny stories and talked about certain athletes. One of the best speakers I've heard in a long time. He has a book out although I haven't read it.
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