AUGUST 5TH 2011
UPCOMING PPV SUMMERSLAM AUGUST 28TH 2011
Beth Phoenix and Natalya vs Lay-Cool.
Match Background: Michelle is making her debut at this show.
The Match: Beth Phoenix connects with rights and lefts and Layla El is down! Layla El charges into the corner, but EATS BOOT and staggers backward. Hooks the leg for a two count. Beth tags out to Natalya Neidhart. Beth Phoenix scoops up Layla. Natalya bounces off the ropes and hits a flying Hart Attack clothesline. Covers for a quick two count. Layla tastes a high angle back suplex. If Spike Lee can sue TNN over the Spike TV nonsense, then Kurt Angle should be able to sue SOMEONE for that. Layla powers out of a headlock. Layla El hits an ugly looking bulldog off the ropes. There's a two count on the pin. Tag to Michelle McCool. Michelle McCool scores with a poor face jam on Natalya Neidhart. Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Running clothesline from Michelle McCool was actually MIGHTY sloppy. Michelle walks into a drop toe hold. A Gut buster connects on Michelle and hits hard. Tag to Beth Phoenix. Beth Phoenix hits some punches. How generic. Michelle tags out to Layla El. Beth slams Layla El down and motions to the crowd. Layla El is in trouble. Glam Slam!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!! Beth Phoenix and Natalya climb opposite turnbuckles, working the crowd as they celebrate their victory.
Match Rating 3.5*
Vickie Guerrero is backstage with Dolph Ziggler. She got on THE STICK~! and spent the interview putting Ziggler over, like a manager should.
Segment Rating 4*
Christian vs John Morrison.
Match Background: None.
The Match: Morrison hits a HARD spinning kick to the jaw. STIFF high kick on Christian by John Morrison. Flying elbow from John Morrison connects. Morrison hits a dropkick on Christian and gets right back up. Christian powers out of a John Morrison headlock. Hard impact Russian Leg Sweep by Christian. According to some other reviewers around here, 'legsweep' is one word. Tiger bomb by Christian, which is nowhere near as cool as a botched Pedigree but gets the job done. Hooks the leg for a two count. Morrison blocks the suplex attempt and is able to hit the suplex instead! Spinning bulldog in the corner and Christian is down! There's a two count on the pin. Power drive elbow by John Morrison. That sounds like a feature on a 4 x 4, doesn't it. Pin, but Christian is out just before the three count. Christian blocks a punch. Christian connects with a HARD right hand, sending the opponent down to the mat again. Christian drops an elbow...but John Morrison moves out of the way. John Morrison hits a rolling kick on Christian. Konnan has ruined any chance for me ever enjoying this maneuver again with his ****ty execution of it. John Morrison floors Christian...and climbs the turnbuckles. Off the top - Starship Pain, forget about it. 1....2...3! John Morrison goes into the crowd, where he celebrates his victory
Match Rating 4*
A video is played, hyping Mark Henry.
Segment Rating 3*
Ezekiel Jackson vs Sheamus.
Match Background: None.
The Match: Sheamus charges into the corner, but EATS BOOT and staggers backward. Jackson hits a piledriver on Sheamus. That used to end matches, you know. Hooks the leg for a two count. Ezekiel Jackson misses a clothesline. Jackson takes a headbutt from Sheamus. Sheamus slams Ezekiel Jackson down and motions to the crowd. There's a two count on the pin. Brutal sit out powerbomb on Jackson! Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! BAAACK Body drop by Jackson gets a bit of a pop from the crowd. Jackson backdrops Sheamus out of a piledriver attempt. That took a lot out of Ezekiel Jackson. Spinebuster by Ezekiel Jackson. Hooks the leg for a two count. DEATH VALLEY DRIVAH~! by Ezekiel Jackson just KILLS Sheamus! Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Fallaway slam by Ezekiel Jackson puts down Sheamus. Sheamus gets slammed down hard and winces in pain. Sheamus ducks a wild right hand. Fallaway slam by Sheamus puts down Ezekiel Jackson. Massive lariat! Stan Hansen would approve. Ezekiel Jackson is in trouble. Here it comes - Brogue Kick. 1....2...3, it's finished. Sheamus climbs each turnbuckle in turn, working the crowd as he celebrates his victory
Match Rating 3.5*
A video is played, hyping Brodus Clay.
Segment Rating 3.5*
Alicia Fox vs Eve Torres vs Gail Kim vs Rosa Mendes.
Match Background: This will be a four corners bout.
The Match: Gail Kim just WAFFLES Eve with a STIFF chop that hurt ME to watch! Flying elbow from Gail Kim connects. Covers for a quick two count. Eve pushes out of a Gail Kim hold. Tag to Rosa Mendes. Gail Kim takes a vertical suplex from Rosa Mendes. Rosa Mendes misses a clothesline...and takes out the referee accidentally! Rosa Mendes uses something that LOOKS like a reverse suplex. The judges say yes, but barely. Hooks the leg, but the referee is still out! Double leg takedown from Rosa Mendes sets up a ground and pound in the middle of the ring. What the hell is this, UFC? Gail Kim powers out of a Rosa Mendes headlock. Tag between Gail Kim and Alicia Fox. Suplex into a front slam from Alicia Fox, but the execution was CRAPTASTIC~!. Rosa just EATS a swinging neckbreaker slam from Alicia Fox. Rosa blocks the suplex attempt and is able to hit the suplex instead! Alicia Fox walks into a chop to the pecs. Ouchy. Rosa Mendes nearly ends the career of Alicia Fox with a screwed up german suplex. GET AWAY FROM THE WRESTLING BUSINESS! Tag between Rosa Mendes and Gail Kim. Gail Kim hits a dropkick on Alicia Fox and gets right back up. DDT from the top rope by Gail Kim. That looked KILLER. Alicia Fox is in trouble. Eat Defeat!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!!
Match Rating 3*
Drew McIntyre is backstage. He hyped himself up on THE STICK~!, talking about what he was going to do...and soon.
Segment Rating 3.5*
Bobby Lashley vs Dolph Ziggler.
Match Background: Lashley is making his debut at this show.
The Match: STIFF~! chop lights up Ziggler who covers up to try and stop the agonizing PAIN! Dolph Ziggler avoids a Bobby Lashley avalanche by getting out of the damn way! Lashley is a glutton for punishment and just continues to take it during this match. The referee bumps after catching a wild right hand and is down. Massive lariat! Stan Hansen would approve. Hooks the leg, but the referee is still out! Bobby Lashley comes up with a right hand out of nowhere. Flying shoulder tackle by Lashley sends Ziggler CRASHING to the mat. Spinebuster by Bobby Lashley. Covers for a quick two count. Massive lariat! Stan Hansen would approve. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Ziggler backdrops Bobby Lashley out of a piledriver attempt. That took a lot out of Dolph Ziggler. Massive back suplex! Bobby Lashley got snapped in half, but not literally because that would just end the match now wouldn't it. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Dolph Ziggler misses a clothesline. Bobby Lashley has Dolph Ziggler down on the canvas. Dolph Ziggler gets locked in the Dragon Sleeper! Submission victory! Bobby Lashley remains in the ring, celebrating the victory.
Match Rating 3.5*
Shane McMahon makes his to the ring, and takes a microphone. He announces the signing of a brand new tag team, Worlds Greatest Tag Team. They come out and climb into the ring. They play to the crowd as Shane looks on.
Segment Rating 4*
Big Show vs Rey Mysterio vs Randy Orton vs The Miz.
Match Background: This will be an elimination bout. This match is for the World Heavyweight title.
The Match: Orton scoops and slams The Miz. What's the difference between a scoop slam and a body slam anyway? BIG clothesline on The Miz. Covers for a quick two count. The Miz pulls a mule kick out of nowhere. Tag to Rey Mysterio. Mysterio hits a dropkick on Randy Orton and gets right back up. Randy Orton charges, Mysterio moves, and the referee is knocked silly! Back heel kick off the second rope, Orton goes down. Hooks the leg, but the referee is still out! Mysterio uses a basement dropkick to the knee and it looks like it might be TIME TO GO TO SCHOOL~! Rey Mysterio gets taken down out of nowhere! Tag between Randy Orton and Big Show. Nice piledriver on Mysterio. BAAACK Body drop by Mysterio gets a bit of a pop from the crowd. Rey Mysterio fights out of a grapple. Mysterio hits a dropkick on Big Show and gets right back up. Power drive elbow by Rey Mysterio. That sounds like a feature on a 4 x 4, doesn't it. The ref gets into position, administers the three count, and it's over. Rey Mysterio pins Big Show. STIFF~! chop lights up Mysterio who covers up to try and stop the agonizing PAIN! Bodyslam by The Miz. Covers for a quick two count. Spinebuster by The Miz. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Rey Mysterio reverses a hip toss. Springboard dropkick from Rey Mysterio. Nicely done. Mysterio tags out to Randy Orton. Powerbomb on The Miz. Cover gets three for Randy Orton, The Miz got pinned. Mysterio takes a headbutt from Randy Orton. Rey Mysterio elbows Randy Orton in the face to break a hammerlock. Spinning bulldog in the corner and Orton is down! Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Orton powers out of a headlock. BIG clothesline on Mysterio. Rey Mysterio hooks up a suplex, but Orton flips out and lands on his feet, and quickly grabs the tights to score with a school boy pin! 1...2..3! The referee somehow missed the blatant cheating!
Match Rating 4*
Show Rating 3.5*