I have to agree with you! If what you're doing isn't working, try something different. It is much more to it than matching personnel. If you're getting abused on short routes, you should call a defense that covers short routes. This may expose you deep, but will force the QB to hold the ball which may lead to a sack. Try to get accustomed to usering the MLB to cover the TE down the seams and crossing routes. Can't rely on the comp to do everything my friends...
Another tip, play to the strengths of your personnel. If you have great zone defenders, play more zone and vice versa for man. Use players with good speed for pass rush, you have just got to be creative. I play online and CFM. I know that some people despise playing online, but it helps you because it forces you adjust to your opponent. Play a few unranked games and it may help you to become a better Madden player overall.