No Brady Bunch: An alternate reality Patriot franchise (Madden 11)

[Nunyerbiz]

After reading a number of great threads on this sub-board, I've decided to jump into the wonderful world of Operation Sports Dynasty stuff. I wanted a rebuilding project, but a lot of talented folks around here are already doing great work with the usual suspects like the Browns, Lions, Seahawks, Bills, etc. I considered the Jaguars for a minute or two... then much like the citizens of Jacksonville... I forgot about them.

No, I want to go a different direction. Push things a little more towards "alternate universe" ... Like that one episode of Star Trek where Kirk hooks up with the green alien chick in a time machine which causes Hitler to win WW2 and Bill Gates to invent the iPod. At least I think it was something like that, I dunno, never watched Star Trek much.

So, all I needed was an angle. I'll cut to the chase, as you've probably already figured out my angle based on the title of this thread:

Tom Brady suffers a career threatening injury in preseason 2010. The Pats stumble through an awful season. Randy Moss wants nothing to do with the rebuilding, does he demand a trade? bolt in free agency? get the franchise tag? Fred Taylor, Sammy Morris and Kevin Faulk realize that they are over the NFL hill.. do they retire? Wes Welker realizes he's 5'8" and white, can he still be productive?

The first season is going to simulated and told only via the fake ESPN.com stories that will follow this introductory post. The 2010 season is just to set up the premise and get me to my first off season.

I'm going to take all the football related stuff: gameplay, roster moves, etc. seriously... But I'm going to have fun with everything else. I hope you enjoy the setup for the 2010 season... and I hope to be back in a couple days with the Patriots off season and more specifics as to how I'll be working everything.

Please feel free to reply and comment on what I've done so far... even if you think this is all one big awful mistake.... I'm probably going to plow ahead anyways.

[Nunyerbiz]

Updated: August 12th, 2010, 11:18 AM ET

Tom Brady lost for season

____________________________________________

Associated Press

FOXBORO, MA -- For the second time in two years, Tom Brady is badly injured.

Image cropped to remove graphic lower extremity bone breakage

The latest injury happened in the 1st quarter of a pre-season game against the Falcons in Atlanta. Brady took a devasting hit from two blitzing defenders. Although details on the injury have not been fully released, it is believe that multiple compound fractures are involved. The injury is potentially career threatening.

"I've been around football for a long time." says former Washington Redskin quarterback Joe Theismann, who was working the broadcast for the NFL Network. "This injury makes what Lawrence Taylor did to me look like a high ankle sprain. I vomited all over Matt Millen the moment it happened. Brought back a lot of bad memories. I just hope he can make a speedy recovery."

The injury was initially treated at the Georgia Dome by team doctors, but reconstructive surgery could happen as early as today. "We've already geared up production. This will be a big order." said Toby Hinkerling, president of Titanium Rods, Screws and Bolts Manufacturing Incorporated. "Some of our guys are going to earn some good overtime pay making the parts for Tom's new lower legs."

The Patriots have annonced the signing of former Buffalo Bills quarterback Trent Edwards and San Diego cast-off Jonathan Crompton to compete for the new opening at quarterback. The only other quarterback on the roster is 2nd year man Brian Hoyer.

[Nunyerbiz]

Updated: October 6th, 2010, 1:43 PM ET

Moss not happy in New England

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Associated Press

FOXBORO, MA -- In the final year of his contract with New England and Tom Brady likely to retire due to injury, Randy Moss is back to his old fashioned malcontent ways.

Randy Moss

"Randy Moss just has to do what is right for Randy Moss and Randy Moss's family. If that means Randy Moss is no longer Randy Moss in New England, then that's what Randy Moss has to make happen for Randy Moss." said the disgruntled wide reciever. Sources have confirmed that he broke the world record for "Most times referring to oneself in the third person in a single statement". The record was formerly held my LeBron James of the NBA's Miami Heat.

The Patriots have struggled so far this season without Brady and playing with a defense that has been suspect at times. Their only victory has come against the lowly Buffalo Bills in week three. Currently sitting at 1-3 with multiple tough opponents still left on the schedule, many around the league wonder if it's time for the Pats to consider a rebuilding project that doesn't include Moss. He has seemed uninterested in many snaps, clearly not running precise routes or blocking well on rushing plays.

"When they call my number, I don't even bother running 10 yards past the line [of scrimmage], none of our quarterbacks can make that [expletive] throw anyways." says Moss. He may have a point, New England is near the bottom of the league in offense. They have played all three quarterbacks on the roster, but none has been particularly effective. Through four games, Moss has only 13 catches for 101 yards and no scores.

Sources close to the Patriots front office confirm the team is actively shopping the Pro-Bowl reciever. Resigning him or slapping him with the franchise tag doesn't seem an option, as Moss clearly does not seem interested in any rebuilding years in Boston. New England would look to stockpile some draft picks for the upcoming draft, but Moss could be alienating potential trade suitors with his big mouth.

"[Expletive] that! Teams around this league know what Randy Moss can do when Randy Moss wants to do Randy Moss things. Somebody will very glad they added Randy Moss to their roster and have him do Randy Moss things and make Randy Moss plays that only Randy Moss can make Randy Moss." said Moss, shattering the world record he had set only 90 seconds earlier.

Other Notes

Long-time Patriot running back Kevin Faulk announced his retirement after suffering a knee injury in the week 4 loss to the Dolphins.

"A drumstick from KFC has more cartilage then my knees. I'm really, really horrifically old for a running back. It's time to hang it up. I look forward to hobbling after my kids on my ravaged legs for the next ten years." said Faulk. The team has signed veteran running back Willie Parker to replace Faulk's spot on the roster. Terms were not disclosed, but Parker's deal was believed to be a two-year contract. Pending a physical, he will be available to suit up after the upcoming bye week.

 

 

 

[Nunyerbiz]

Updated: October 10th, 2010, 8:17 PM ET

Moss traded, Jones signed

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Associated Press

FOXBORO, MA -- Randy Moss is no longer a New England Patriot. The disgruntled star WR was shipped to the Atlanta Falcons this afternoon for Altanta's 4th and 6th round picks in the upcoming NFL draft. Moss has been a malcontent since Tom Brady suffered a season ending injury in the pre-season. The Patriots have struggled on both sides of the ball and it appears a rebuilding project is under way. New England was hoping to get a 3rd round choice for Moss, but concerns about his age, attitude and expiring contract left most teams uninterested. The Falcons are tied for the NFC South lead and look interesting in making a run now. Both starting receivers Roddy White and Michael Jenkins have been battling injuries. White is now healthy, but Jenkins will miss the remainder of the regular season with a torn quadricep.

The Patriots have signed former Jacksonville Jaguar wide reciever Matt Jones to a one-year contact. Jones has not played in a regular season NFL game since the 2008 season following a number of drug related incidents off the field.

 

 

 

[Nunyerbiz]

Updated: December 29th, 2010, 3:38 PM ET

Tom Brady announces retirement

____________________________________________

Associated Press

FOXBORO, MA -- Ever since the devastating injury this preseason, the writing was on the wall. Tom Brady was most likely never going to take another NFL snap. Today he made it official.

Brady to write book, join E! channel

"I had a great run, won championships, accomplished everything I wanted to on the football field. It was a dream come true, but now it's time to move on." said Brady at today's press conference.

The Patriots have stuggled mightily this season. Brady went down with injury, Randy Moss whined his way to Atlanta via a trade. Nothing has looked good during this 5-10 trainwreck of a season. Only a meaningless game against the Dolphins is left before the players can clean out their lockers.

"I feel bad for those guys in the locker room, they are a tough group. They will bounce back." stated Brady. His plans for retirement include a probable book deal, hosting his own fashion show on the E! Network and spending time with his family. "I'm going to relax for awhile, hang out with my kids. Even that one I had after I knocked up my girlfriend and left her for a supermodel."

Brady's retirement will clear a large chunk of cap space for his former team, who will be looking to rebuild starting with this year's free agency and amateur draft. Brady and Patriots organization have reached an injury settlement, which includes returning some of the signing bonus money from his last contract extention. Both sides agreed that the money will be used to setup a charity to purchase hair styling products for under priviledged kids.

[bichettehappens]

Liking the creative angle, reminds me of the "George Steinbrenner dies, new owner wants to run the Yankees like a low budget team" idea I had... before he died a week later

Anyways, following this for sure

Also, digging the layout of course hahaha

[bryanjayyy]

Good ****, haha. Love the Randy Moss quotes and it reminded me of that Family Guy episode with "moose stuff"

Randy Moss will do Randy Moss stuff. What's Randy Moss stuff. Well I can catch a 45 yard touchdown pass or have sex with ya and everything in between. < /failedfamilyguyjoke>

anyway good stuff ill be following

[Nunyerbiz]

Quote: Originally Posted by bichettehappens

Liking the creative angle, reminds me of the "George Steinbrenner dies, new owner wants to run the Yankees like a low budget team" idea I had... before he died a week later Anyways, following this for sure Also, digging the layout of course hahaha

You killed Steinbrenner with your franchise idea! (But I kid old man George... may he rest in peace.)

And yes, your Bills franchise layout was a big influence on how I will make things look. I'm not very good at html, so it took me a while to figure out everything... but I am happy so far.

Between my job, my wife and my kids.. it will probably be a few days before I can get to the draft... But I'm looking forward to it.