Oh, Tiger, it was cheaper to keep her

Arles · 06-30-2010, 11:44 AM

I'll never understand why famous athletes under the age of 30 get married. You can get married and have kids later in your 30s when you're ready to settle down and not owe a mint to your first wife:

Quote:

Tiger Woods is banned from letting girlfriends near his kids in a divorce deal netting his ex a record $750 million settlement, The Sun reported Wednesday.

The golfer agreed to keep single women away from daughter Sam, three, and son Charlie, one.

He can bring a new flame into their lives only if he marries her. In return, former wife Elin Nordegren ,30, gets the biggest payout ever seen in a celebrity divorce.

But she can never publicly speak out over his alleged flings with socialite Rachel Uchitel, reality star Jaimee Grubbs, porn queen Joslyn James and up to 17 others.

A pal said: "Elin is desperate to protect the children from the womanizing side of their father.

"Tiger's main fear is her telling her story after he's rebuilt his reputation, sending him back to the gutter."

Swedish ex model Nordegren ended up with double the sum she originally sought, after her lawyers proved Woods, 34, was worth much more than the $1billion she thought.

Her friend explained: "Elin's legal team have done a great job digging up all sorts of assets.

"The price of the huge sum is her silence: no interviews, tell-all books, or TV appearances about this for the rest of her life -- even if Tiger dies first -- or she'll lose the lot."

The friend said: "Everything's signed. Elin is ready to file for divorce at Orlando County Court. She expects to in the next seven days."

Nordegren gets sole physical custody of their kids but they will split legal custody.

That means Woods will share decisions about their future -- so Nordegren will not be able to permanently relocate them to her native Sweden.

Woods -- believed to be building a golf resort in Dubai and investing in the Bahamas -- will be able to see the kids for up to half of each week.

He can renegotiate the custody agreement in five years.

The pal said: "Elin admits that despite everything, Tiger loves his kids and has been a decent dad.

"She is confident he will not pursue seeing the children that much, due to his work and lifestyle."

Under the no-girlfriends deal, only married women not romantically linked to Woods will be allowed around the children -- plus female members of staff known to Nordegren.

FOXNews.com - Elin Nordegren Gets $750M, Custody of Kids in Exchange for Silence in Tiger Woods Divorce

cartman · 06-30-2010, 11:49 AM

Hey, Elin, how YOU doin'? Call me, k?

Sun Tzu · 06-30-2010, 11:52 AM

Bitch is just as crazy as he is, if not more. I see Woods as being a kid who is just playing around. If you come at someone with a golf club, you nuts.

JediKooter · 06-30-2010, 11:52 AM

I saw her first man.

bulletsponge · 06-30-2010, 12:00 PM

the title should read "Oh Tiger, it was cheaper to kill her"

this is what happens when you marry a trophy wife and your a complete dog. if you know you cant stay loyal, dont get married

Mustang · 06-30-2010, 12:01 PM

'The pal said: "Elin admits that despite everything, Tiger loves his kids and has been a decent dad.

"She is confident he will not pursue seeing the children that much, due to his work and lifestyle."

Those 2 statements conflict with each other.

Ksyrup · 06-30-2010, 12:06 PM

He has been a decent dad while married.

However, she doesn't expect an unattached Tiger with no wife and kids around the house and touring half the year to be able to spend much time with them going forward. So I guess she's betting that he will turn into a not so great dad without the family together.

molson · 06-30-2010, 12:13 PM

"Under the no-girlfriends deal, only married women not romantically linked to Woods will be allowed around the children -- plus female members of staff known to Nordegren"

OK, I think Tiger can work a loophole there. He can have his kids around married broads that he's banging, as long as there's no "romance".

stevew · 06-30-2010, 12:15 PM

I can't wait til Tiger Woods grows a Hitler Mustache and dares us to talk about it.

flere-imsaho · 06-30-2010, 12:17 PM

Wow. Elin's lawyers just gave Tiger the treatment he's been giving his golf opponents for ages.

JediKooter · 06-30-2010, 12:17 PM

What's the over/under on Elin's early demise under mysterious circumstances?

Kodos · 06-30-2010, 12:19 PM

Sorry to see this happen to such a nice guy.

Sun Tzu · 06-30-2010, 12:33 PM

$750M...isn't that like what he makes in one year?

EagleFan · 06-30-2010, 05:29 PM

Insane ruling.

molson · 06-30-2010, 05:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EagleFan

Insane ruling.

It's not a ruling, it's an agreement between the parties.

Karlifornia · 06-30-2010, 05:33 PM

Why does she deserve that much money? It's just stupid.

Nogram · 06-30-2010, 05:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Karlifornia

Why does she deserve that much money? It's just stupid.

+1

jeff061 · 06-30-2010, 06:00 PM

I don't think "deserve" has ever mattered in the least.

Accustomed to a certain way of living, professional skill set non-existent due to husband providing for her. Not saying I agree with it, but yeah, what's deserved doesn't figure in.

jeff061 · 06-30-2010, 06:04 PM

Also may not have to do monthly/yearly payments on top of this and she gets the kids. And he's the guy, who did what he did.

So yeah, he's screwed.

duckman · 06-30-2010, 06:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Karlifornia

Why does she deserve that much money? It's just stupid.

Two words: hush money

Autumn · 06-30-2010, 06:50 PM

Yeah, really $750 million is well worth it to Tiger, he's still got another $750 million. But keeping her from being able to go public is worth a career to him. She'd have him by the balls for the next decade if she could release a new tidbit of information every few months. This way he knows it will all eventually blow over with new information coming out.

Greyroofoo · 06-30-2010, 07:00 PM

What could be more damaging that hasn't already been released?

chadritt · 06-30-2010, 07:11 PM

Im assuming he wanted to make sure she couldnt remind people of how much they disliked him. Imagine if in a few years hes finally winning again and people start to forgive and then suddenly she releases a book talking about how what he did affected her and the kids. This way its gone and he gets to just rebuild his life and never worry about this coming back, at least from her.

Recoil · 06-30-2010, 07:26 PM

Tiger: you are wrong I'm bone thugs in harmon

Those text messages get me every time.

Radii · 06-30-2010, 07:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Greyroofoo

What could be more damaging that hasn't already been released?

Even if its not new information, hearing it from Elin's perspective, or worse, Elin projecting about its impact on their kids, would be way worse than anything that's come out so far.

Autumn · 06-30-2010, 07:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chadritt

Im assuming he wanted to make sure she couldnt remind people of how much they disliked him. Imagine if in a few years hes finally winning again and people start to forgive and then suddenly she releases a book talking about how what he did affected her and the kids. This way its gone and he gets to just rebuild his life and never worry about this coming back, at least from her.

Exactly. I'm sure she has a detail or two people don't know. But even if she doesn't, her perspective can obtain an interview or a book at will. Rehashing the story in the press is the one thing he doesn't want. Every time that happens people start remembering they dislike him. Once it goes away for a while, people will forget.

bulletsponge · 06-30-2010, 11:12 PM

i dont understand why anyone liked him in the first place. hes always been a uncharasmatic, boring corporate schill. hes more famous because hes on tv doing commercials than for his golf, and his sponsors and ESPN turn him into a star. ask yourself, if he wasnt selling something on tv every half hour, or wasnt getting pushed on us by ESPN, would anyone other than golf fans have ever tuned in to watch him

TroyF · 06-30-2010, 11:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Greyroofoo

What could be more damaging that hasn't already been released?

Is this a joke?

Let's think about this.

Short of saying Tiger raped the family pet, Elin could say just about anything (true or untrue) and have credibility over Tiger with the general public. She could be a thorn in his side for the next decade.

I'm not a marketing genius by any stretch, but imagine Elin kicking off her book tour with an appearance on Oprah.

Is she deserving of the money? Of course not. But Tiger paid it to her for a reason. We don't need to turn this on her and make her the mean one. He's the one who nailed porn stars and Denny's waitresses rather than coming home to his wife and children. He can deal with the aftermath of those actions.

DaddyTorgo · 06-30-2010, 11:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TroyF

Is this a joke?

Let's think about this.

Short of saying Tiger raped the family pet, Elin could say just about anything (true or untrue) and have credibility over Tiger with the general public. She could be a thorn in his side for the next decade.

I'm not a marketing genius by any stretch, but imagine Elin kicking off her book tour with an appearance on Oprah.

Is she deserving of the money? Of course not. But Tiger paid it to her for a reason. We don't need to turn this on her and make her the mean one. He's the one who nailed porn stars and Denny's waitresses rather than coming home to his wife and children. He can deal with the aftermath of those actions.

Ding ding ding. She's the good guy in this situation. No amount of money could possibly be enough to compensate her IMO. He's a cheating dirtbag and deserves every bit of the pain that he gets.

EagleFan · 06-30-2010, 11:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by molson

It's not a ruling, it's an agreement between the parties.

Guess I sould have read it.

Insane agreement then.

kingfc22 · 07-01-2010, 12:03 AM

So does Elin write a tell-all book and leave it in her will for to be released after Tiger and her die?

I didn't see a clause to ban this action.

TroyF · 07-01-2010, 12:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kingfc22

So does Elin write a tell-all book and leave it in her will for to be released after Tiger and her die?

I didn't see a clause to ban this action.

How could they ban that action? Why would she bother though? She's not going to waste her time with that.

stevew · 07-01-2010, 12:22 AM

Plus we'll mostly all be dead by 2065 and won't be able to talk about that shit on here.

Bobble · 07-01-2010, 07:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Recoil

Tiger: you are wrong I'm bone thugs in harmon

Those text messages get me every time.

You had me at "bone".

Toddzilla · 07-01-2010, 07:45 AM

This isn't so much about giving her money as it is about taking away money from Tiger.

flere-imsaho · 07-01-2010, 08:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Karlifornia

Why does she deserve that much money? It's just stupid.

???

Without a pre-nup, most divorces split the assets 50/50. Add in the "hush money" aspect, and it's perfectly rational.

This isn't exactly rocket science, people.

DaddyTorgo · 07-01-2010, 08:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Karlifornia

Why does she deserve that much money? It's just stupid.

you're just jealous you're not a trophy-spouse.

it's okay...i am too.

Noop · 07-01-2010, 10:05 AM

Wouldn't have gave her ass a dime. Tiger is an idiot for wanting to get married while he is mega rich. I hope he goes to get a vasectomy and enjoys his bachelor hood the way it was suppose to be enjoyed.

molson · 07-01-2010, 10:09 AM

Marriage is a business contract. And if you don't like the terms, you can modify them, or not get married.

Logan · 07-01-2010, 10:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Noop

Wouldn't have gave her ass a dime.

If it were only that easy.

Noop · 07-01-2010, 10:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Logan

If it were only that easy.

Man I am signing a prenup and I mean one of those absurd unbreakable ones... if they exist. I refuse for a woman to take from me when she hasn't even worked or assisted in making it happen.

Honolulu_Blue · 07-01-2010, 10:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Noop

Man I am signing a prenup and I mean one of those absurd unbreakable ones... if they exist. I refuse for a woman to take from me when she hasn't even worked or assisted in making it happen.

Her lawyers will carve your little prenup like a knife through warm butter. She'll even end up getting half of ever .gif you've ever posted on here.

Noop · 07-01-2010, 10:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Honolulu_Blue

Her lawyers will carve your little prenup like a knife through warm butter. She'll even end up getting half of ever .gif you've ever posted on here.

As long as I get to keep my porn collection.

molson · 07-01-2010, 10:40 AM

Damn Noop, you gotta work on your negotiation skills. You were talked down from "everything" to your porn collection in 2 posts.

Honolulu_Blue · 07-01-2010, 10:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by molson

Damn Noop, you gotta work on your negotiation skills. You were talked down from "everything" to your porn collection in 2 posts.

Exactly. And divorce law isn't even my area of expertise. Half of the Noop Family Fortune will be in the hands of the Future Ex-Mrs. Noop in no time.

Noop · 07-01-2010, 10:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by molson

Damn Noop, you gotta work on your negotiation skills. You were talked down from "everything" to your porn collection in 2 posts.

LOL. It sounded funnier in my head.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Honolulu_Blue

Exactly. And divorce law isn't even my area of expertise. Half of the Noop Family Fortune will be in the hands of the Future Ex-Mrs. Noop in no time.

I guarantee she won't, if there is no possible way to protect my assets then I won't get married.

flere-imsaho · 07-01-2010, 10:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Noop

I guarantee she won't, if there is no possible way to protect my assets then I won't get married.

This potentially won't help you either.

Edit: You might be best off just not interacting with women, based on these concerns.

MrBug708 · 07-01-2010, 11:09 AM

Noop - Just tell her lawyers that it wasn't a real girl, just a picture you found

DaddyTorgo · 07-01-2010, 11:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MrBug708

Noop - Just tell her lawyers that it wasn't a real girl, just a picture you found

duckman · 07-01-2010, 05:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Noop

I guarantee she won't, if there is no possible way to protect my assets then I won't get married.

That worked out great for Clint Eastwood. Ever heard the term palimony?

06-30-2010, 11:49 AM	#2
cartman Death Herald Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Le stelle la notte sono grandi e luminose nel cuore profondo del Texas	Hey, Elin, how YOU doin'? Call me, k? __________________ Thinkin' of a master plan 'Cuz ain't nuthin' but sweat inside my hand So I dig into my pocket, all my money is spent So I dig deeper but still comin' up with lint

06-30-2010, 11:52 AM	#3
Sun Tzu Pro Starter Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: In the thick of it.	Bitch is just as crazy as he is, if not more. I see Woods as being a kid who is just playing around. If you come at someone with a golf club, you nuts. __________________ I'm still here. Don't touch my fucking bacon.

06-30-2010, 11:52 AM	#4
JediKooter Coordinator Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: San Diego via Sausalito via San Jose via San Diego	I saw her first man. __________________ I'm no longer a Chargers fan, they are dead to me Coming this summer to a movie theater near you: The Adventures of Jedikooter: Part 4

06-30-2010, 12:01 PM	#6
Mustang Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Wisconsin	'The pal said: "Elin admits that despite everything, Tiger loves his kids and has been a decent dad. "She is confident he will not pursue seeing the children that much, due to his work and lifestyle." Those 2 statements conflict with each other. __________________ You, you will regret what you have done this day. I will make you regret ever being born. Your going to wish you never left your mothers womb, where it was warm and safe... and wet. i am going to show you pain you never knew existed, you are going to see a whole new spectrum of pain, like a Rainboooow. But! This rainbow is not just like any other rainbow, its...

06-30-2010, 12:06 PM	#7
Ksyrup This guy has posted so much, his fingers are about to fall off. Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: In Absentia	He has been a decent dad while married. However, she doesn't expect an unattached Tiger with no wife and kids around the house and touring half the year to be able to spend much time with them going forward. So I guess she's betting that he will turn into a not so great dad without the family together. __________________ M's pitcher Miguel Batista: "Now, I feel like I've had everything. I've talked pitching with Sandy Koufax, had Kenny G play for me. Maybe if I could have an interview with God, then I'd be served. I'd be complete."

06-30-2010, 12:00 PM	#5
bulletsponge Pro Starter Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: TX	the title should read "Oh Tiger, it was cheaper to kill her" this is what happens when you marry a trophy wife and your a complete dog. if you know you cant stay loyal, dont get married

06-30-2010, 12:13 PM	#8
molson General Manager Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: The Mountains	"Under the no-girlfriends deal, only married women not romantically linked to Woods will be allowed around the children -- plus female members of staff known to Nordegren" OK, I think Tiger can work a loophole there. He can have his kids around married broads that he's banging, as long as there's no "romance".

06-30-2010, 12:15 PM	#9
stevew Hall Of Famer Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: the yo'	I can't wait til Tiger Woods grows a Hitler Mustache and dares us to talk about it.

06-30-2010, 12:17 PM	#10
flere-imsaho Coordinator Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Chicagoland	Wow. Elin's lawyers just gave Tiger the treatment he's been giving his golf opponents for ages.

06-30-2010, 12:19 PM	#12
Kodos Resident Alien Join Date: Jun 2001	Sorry to see this happen to such a nice guy.

06-30-2010, 12:33 PM	#13
Sun Tzu Pro Starter Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: In the thick of it.	$750M...isn't that like what he makes in one year? __________________ I'm still here. Don't touch my fucking bacon.

06-30-2010, 05:29 PM	#14
EagleFan Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Mays Landing, NJ USA	Insane ruling.

06-30-2010, 05:33 PM	#16
Karlifornia Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: San Jose, CA	Why does she deserve that much money? It's just stupid. __________________ Look into the mind of a crazy man (NSFW) http://www.whitepowerupdate.wordpress.com

06-30-2010, 06:00 PM	#18
jeff061 Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: MA	I don't think "deserve" has ever mattered in the least. Accustomed to a certain way of living, professional skill set non-existent due to husband providing for her. Not saying I agree with it, but yeah, what's deserved doesn't figure in. __________________

06-30-2010, 06:04 PM	#19
jeff061 Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: MA	Also may not have to do monthly/yearly payments on top of this and she gets the kids. And he's the guy, who did what he did. So yeah, he's screwed. __________________

06-30-2010, 06:50 PM	#21
Autumn Head Coach Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Bath, ME	Yeah, really $750 million is well worth it to Tiger, he's still got another $750 million. But keeping her from being able to go public is worth a career to him. She'd have him by the balls for the next decade if she could release a new tidbit of information every few months. This way he knows it will all eventually blow over with new information coming out.

06-30-2010, 07:00 PM	#22
Greyroofoo Pro Starter Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Alabama	What could be more damaging that hasn't already been released?

06-30-2010, 07:11 PM	#23
chadritt High School Varsity Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Los Angeles, CA	Im assuming he wanted to make sure she couldnt remind people of how much they disliked him. Imagine if in a few years hes finally winning again and people start to forgive and then suddenly she releases a book talking about how what he did affected her and the kids. This way its gone and he gets to just rebuild his life and never worry about this coming back, at least from her. Last edited by chadritt : 06-30-2010 at 07:14 PM.

06-30-2010, 07:26 PM	#24
Recoil High School Varsity Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: GA	Tiger: you are wrong I'm bone thugs in harmon Those text messages get me every time.

06-30-2010, 11:12 PM	#27
bulletsponge Pro Starter Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: TX	i dont understand why anyone liked him in the first place. hes always been a uncharasmatic, boring corporate schill. hes more famous because hes on tv doing commercials than for his golf, and his sponsors and ESPN turn him into a star. ask yourself, if he wasnt selling something on tv every half hour, or wasnt getting pushed on us by ESPN, would anyone other than golf fans have ever tuned in to watch him

07-01-2010, 12:03 AM	#31
kingfc22 Head Coach Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Morgan Hill, CA	So does Elin write a tell-all book and leave it in her will for to be released after Tiger and her die? I didn't see a clause to ban this action. __________________ Fan of SF Giants, 49ers, Sharks, Arsenal

07-01-2010, 12:22 AM	#33
stevew Hall Of Famer Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: the yo'	Plus we'll mostly all be dead by 2065 and won't be able to talk about that shit on here.

07-01-2010, 07:45 AM	#35
Toddzilla Pro Starter Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Burke, VA	This isn't so much about giving her money as it is about taking away money from Tiger.

07-01-2010, 10:05 AM	#38
Noop Bonafide Seminole Fan Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Miami	Wouldn't have gave her ass a dime. Tiger is an idiot for wanting to get married while he is mega rich. I hope he goes to get a vasectomy and enjoys his bachelor hood the way it was suppose to be enjoyed. __________________ Subby's favorite woman hater.

07-01-2010, 10:09 AM	#39
molson General Manager Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: The Mountains	Marriage is a business contract. And if you don't like the terms, you can modify them, or not get married.

07-01-2010, 10:40 AM	#44
molson General Manager Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: The Mountains	Damn Noop, you gotta work on your negotiation skills. You were talked down from "everything" to your porn collection in 2 posts. Last edited by molson : 07-01-2010 at 10:40 AM.

07-01-2010, 11:09 AM	#48
MrBug708 Head Coach Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Whittier	Noop - Just tell her lawyers that it wasn't a real girl, just a picture you found

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