I have no control over this

TCY Junkie · 12-20-2008, 09:37 AM

My mom has been running a low fever for about 5 months at night. She had blood work done and they said nothing was wrong. 5 weeks ago they found spots on her liver and spleen. The biopsy didn't turn up anything. Oh, they told us they were sure it was cancer before the biopsy and then said they didn't know what it was but wasn't cancer. She was in there for ten days and was released and a week later they wanted her to do another biopsy but we took her to a hospital in Houston. After all the test didn't show anything they did exploratory surgery and found the spleen diseased and thought it needed removed. They ran test on the spleen and samples they took from the liver for over a week. My mom came home Tuesday. Wednesday night we took her back because her feet were way too swollen. They took x-rays that night and then by 10 the next morning they took some new x-rays. The spots grew over night even. They found a spot on her lungs before she was released Monday and thought it might be pneumonia. The new results confirmed that the spot was also much bigger. Thursday at noon the results came back and they told us two weeks to two months at the most. Treatment was nil to be successful they thought and could only prolong suffering and make her be in terrible pain. She had been feeling a little worse, but until they removed the spleen she was still very active. Two weeks ago we were out doing things and now two weeks from now she probably won't be here. She is on hospice, my grandmother was on hospice for over a year until she passed 13 months ago. My mom took care of her for two years when she moved in her house and the last 3 months she should have been in a nursing home. Seeing the same thing with my mother this time is just cruel.

I accept the situation. I've prayed that God's will be done and she won't suffer much. I'm very concerned for my dad who doesn't have any major health issues but I have doubts he will live long after losing her.

I am odd. I believe asking others to pray for you is being self centered. I do however believe in praying and would appreciate them. I'm not praying for a miracle to happen, but don't have a problem with it if you would.

I was home schooled from third grade on. I also drove her 3 hours on weekends for 7 years so she could take care of her mother. I don't know how anyone could be closer to their mother. I doubt I will update this.

Pete

Flasch186 · 12-20-2008, 09:43 AM

sorry to hear this. I'll say a prayer for your family.

Marc Vaughan · 12-20-2008, 09:53 AM

Really sorry to hear about this - have said a prayer for her.

Draft Dodger · 12-20-2008, 09:55 AM

really sorry to hear this. good vibes are on the way.

MizzouRah · 12-20-2008, 09:59 AM

That's horrible.. I couldn't imagine what you're going through or dealing with now.

Your mom will be in my prayers Pete.

flere-imsaho · 12-20-2008, 10:18 AM

Best wishes, you'll be in my thoughts. I hope things turn out as right as they can.

path12 · 12-20-2008, 10:26 AM

Very sorry to hear this. Best wishes to you and your family.

terpkristin · 12-20-2008, 10:31 AM

Wow, that's a lot to go through. You and your family are in my thoughts, and know that the FOFC family is here for you...

/tk

samifan24 · 12-20-2008, 10:32 AM

Your family are in our prayers.

Buccaneer · 12-20-2008, 10:53 AM

I am very sorry to hear this. The best I can offer is to pray for peace and strength, and minimal suffering.

JonInMiddleGA · 12-20-2008, 11:05 AM

Prayers for you all, and my sincerest sympathy for all those affected by the situation.

Lathum · 12-20-2008, 11:41 AM

really sorry to hear about this, prayers are with you

Scoobz0202 · 12-20-2008, 11:52 AM

Just terrible.. Such a cruel thing to go through.

Your family will be in my thoughts..

DanGarion · 12-20-2008, 12:35 PM

Always sort of thought of you as a gimmick, even after you stopped acting how you first did, but regardless... coming here and sharing something personal like this takes a lot of courage.

Your mom, you, and your family will be in the thoughts.

M GO BLUE!!! · 12-20-2008, 05:49 PM

Man... God Bless your family, and I hope & pray your mom lives happily the rest of her life. (Hoping for a miracle along the way, allowing that to be a long life as well...)

cougarfreak · 12-20-2008, 07:12 PM

Pete.......prayers and luck to you. It sounds like you have been able to spend a large amount of time with your mother and are better for it. If no miracle occurs (and I will pray for one), may she suffer naught.

Toddzilla · 12-20-2008, 07:59 PM

Pete - a prayer for you and one for your mom as well. Be strong and know we're all keeping you and your family in our thoughts

- Peter

oykib · 12-20-2008, 08:18 PM

You'll be in my prayers too.

BigDPW · 12-20-2008, 08:23 PM

Praying for your mom and your family...

Swaggs · 12-20-2008, 09:26 PM

Best wishes.

It seems like there are a lot of folks going through really tough times this holiday season.

EagleFan · 12-20-2008, 09:37 PM

Sorry to hear this, you and your family will be in our thoughts.

Crim · 12-21-2008, 07:10 PM

Definitely very sorry to hear all this, Pete. I'm praying for you and your family. I know you'll be strong for your mom and dad. Don't neglect to take care of yourself as well, though.

DaddyTorgo · 12-21-2008, 07:12 PM

Best wishes during this difficult time.

cuervo72 · 12-22-2008, 08:06 AM

Absolutely awful, TCY. Thoughts and prayers.

Mizzou B-ball fan · 12-22-2008, 08:22 AM

Best of luck. Been there and done that unfortunately. I know you said you likely wouldn't provide an update. While I certainly respect that, I think that you should provide an update or write about it periodically. When I went through a similar situation, I found that writing about it was very theraputic and helped relieve some stress. Even if you don't do it here, do it somewhere.

Kodos · 12-22-2008, 09:27 AM

So sorry to hear this. My thoughts will be with you and your family.

dolfin · 12-22-2008, 09:36 AM

My thoughts are with you and your family.

RainMaker · 12-22-2008, 03:14 PM

I'm very sorry to hear about this. I can't fathom what you're going through and don't know how I'd handle a similar situation. You're in my thoughts.

CamEdwards · 12-22-2008, 03:52 PM

I'd like to echo the thoughts and prayers that others have mentioned here. I'm going through something similar with my own mother right now, and I can tell you that if there is a blessing in all of this, it's that you are with her physically right now. I hope that the remaining days are filled with love, even if it doesn't ease the heartache.

MikeVic · 12-22-2008, 04:03 PM

TCY Junkie · 01-08-2009, 06:06 PM

Thanks everyone,

I felt I needed to let you guys know I appreciated it. I posted that on Saturday and the doctor gave her blood just so she could make the ride home on Friday. He heard my sister was flying in or wouldn't have gave her any. She did better until Sunday night. Monday she said she wasn't in pain but obvious she was going down hill quick. Tuesday around noon she went to sleep and didn't wake up. Christmas Eve at 3 a.m. was about the time it was official. It was so quick, I think it was for the best. She didn't want to suffer.

She was amazing. Monday she barely had any energy, but when she heard my dad crying in another room. She looked very alert and said looking into my eyes "I don't know what to do". That close to death and all she cared about was him.

I will try to make her proud.

MizzouRah · 01-08-2009, 09:03 PM

Sad TCY... I'm sure you have already made her proud.

Butter · 01-09-2009, 06:44 AM

Sincerely sorry for your loss.

ISiddiqui · 01-09-2009, 07:54 AM

Sorry to hear about your mother's passing.

Mizzou B-ball fan · 01-09-2009, 08:12 AM

Our family had a extremely similar scenario in September. Mother in law reached a point where we finally took her home. While it's tough now, you'll be relieved going forward that:

A) It went relatively quickly. Prolonged death is difficult on family.

B) You and your family were there with her. Regret about not being there when they pass away is pretty common. You'll be thankful that you were there for her.

Best wished moving forward and be sure to keep your dad as active and involved with family/friends as you possibly can. We've done that with my wife's father and it really does help them cope.

Toddzilla · 01-09-2009, 08:44 AM

You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers. Peace be with you.

JediKooter · 01-09-2009, 12:36 PM

I'm sorry to hear about your mom. My condolences to you and your family.

Neuqua · 01-09-2009, 12:38 PM

My condolences, keep your head up.

Lathum · 01-09-2009, 12:50 PM

Sorry to hear.

CleBrownsfan · 01-09-2009, 12:55 PM

My thoughts are with you and your family TCY....

BYU 14 · 01-09-2009, 01:02 PM

Prayers and condolences to you and your Family Pete. The last conversation you had with your Mother shows how special she was, caring only about her loved ones.

PackerFanatic · 01-09-2009, 02:36 PM

Praying for you and your family, man.

12-20-2008, 09:43 AM	#2
Flasch186 Coordinator Join Date: May 2002 Location: Jacksonville, FL	sorry to hear this. I'll say a prayer for your family. __________________ Jacksonville-florida-homes-for-sale Putting a New Spin on Real Estate! ----------------------------------------------------------- Commissioner of the USFL USFL

12-20-2008, 09:55 AM	#4
Draft Dodger Coordinator Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Keene, NH	really sorry to hear this. good vibes are on the way. __________________ Mile High Hockey

12-20-2008, 10:26 AM	#7
path12 Coordinator Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Seattle, WA	Very sorry to hear this. Best wishes to you and your family. __________________ We have always been at war with Eastasia.

12-20-2008, 10:31 AM	#8
terpkristin Grizzled Veteran Join Date: May 2003 Location: Ashburn, VA	Wow, that's a lot to go through. You and your family are in my thoughts, and know that the FOFC family is here for you... /tk __________________ GO TERPS! https://www.flickr.com/photos/terpkristin https://twitter.com/terpkristin

12-20-2008, 10:32 AM	#9
samifan24 Pro Starter Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: NC	Your family are in our prayers. __________________ "You spend a good piece of your life gripping a baseball...and in the end it turns out that it was the other way around all the time." -Jim Bouton

12-20-2008, 09:53 AM	#3
Marc Vaughan SI Games Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Melbourne, FL	Really sorry to hear about this - have said a prayer for her.

12-20-2008, 09:59 AM	#5
MizzouRah Hall Of Famer Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Troy, Mo	That's horrible.. I couldn't imagine what you're going through or dealing with now. Your mom will be in my prayers Pete.

12-20-2008, 10:18 AM	#6
flere-imsaho Coordinator Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Chicagoland	Best wishes, you'll be in my thoughts. I hope things turn out as right as they can.

12-20-2008, 10:53 AM	#10
Buccaneer Head Coach Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Colorado	I am very sorry to hear this. The best I can offer is to pray for peace and strength, and minimal suffering.

12-20-2008, 11:05 AM	#11
JonInMiddleGA Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Behind Enemy Lines in Athens, GA	Prayers for you all, and my sincerest sympathy for all those affected by the situation. __________________ "I lit another cigarette. Unless I specifically inform you to the contrary, I am always lighting another cigarette." - from a novel by Martin Amis

12-20-2008, 11:41 AM	#12
Lathum Favored Bitch #1 Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: homeless in NJ	really sorry to hear about this, prayers are with you

12-20-2008, 11:52 AM	#13
Scoobz0202 Pro Rookie Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Dayton, Ohio	Just terrible.. Such a cruel thing to go through. Your family will be in my thoughts..

12-20-2008, 12:35 PM	#14
DanGarion Coordinator Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: The Great Northwest	Always sort of thought of you as a gimmick, even after you stopped acting how you first did, but regardless... coming here and sharing something personal like this takes a lot of courage. Your mom, you, and your family will be in the thoughts. __________________ Los Angeles Dodgers Check out the FOFC Groups on Facebook! and Reddit! DON'T REPORT ME BRO! Last edited by DanGarion : 12-20-2008 at 12:36 PM.

12-20-2008, 05:49 PM	#15
M GO BLUE!!! Pro Starter Join Date: Sep 2005	Man... God Bless your family, and I hope & pray your mom lives happily the rest of her life. (Hoping for a miracle along the way, allowing that to be a long life as well...)

12-20-2008, 07:12 PM	#16
cougarfreak College Starter Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Out of Grad School Hell :)	Pete.......prayers and luck to you. It sounds like you have been able to spend a large amount of time with your mother and are better for it. If no miracle occurs (and I will pray for one), may she suffer naught.

12-20-2008, 07:59 PM	#17
Toddzilla Pro Starter Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Burke, VA	Pete - a prayer for you and one for your mom as well. Be strong and know we're all keeping you and your family in our thoughts - Peter

12-20-2008, 08:18 PM	#18
oykib College Starter Join Date: Oct 2000	You'll be in my prayers too.

12-20-2008, 08:23 PM	#19
BigDPW College Prospect Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Raleigh, NC	Praying for your mom and your family...

12-20-2008, 09:26 PM	#20
Swaggs Coordinator Join Date: Oct 2000	Best wishes. It seems like there are a lot of folks going through really tough times this holiday season. __________________ DOWN WITH HATTRICK!!! The RWBL Are you reading In The Bleachers?

12-20-2008, 09:37 PM	#21
EagleFan Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Mays Landing, NJ USA	Sorry to hear this, you and your family will be in our thoughts.

12-21-2008, 07:10 PM	#22
Crim College Benchwarmer Join Date: Dec 2003	Definitely very sorry to hear all this, Pete. I'm praying for you and your family. I know you'll be strong for your mom and dad. Don't neglect to take care of yourself as well, though. Last edited by Crim : 12-21-2008 at 07:11 PM.

12-21-2008, 07:12 PM	#23
DaddyTorgo Hall Of Famer Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Massachusetts	Best wishes during this difficult time.

12-22-2008, 08:06 AM	#24
cuervo72 Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Maryland	Absolutely awful, TCY. Thoughts and prayers. __________________ null

12-22-2008, 08:22 AM	#25
Mizzou B-ball fan General Manager Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Kansas City, MO	Best of luck. Been there and done that unfortunately. I know you said you likely wouldn't provide an update. While I certainly respect that, I think that you should provide an update or write about it periodically. When I went through a similar situation, I found that writing about it was very theraputic and helped relieve some stress. Even if you don't do it here, do it somewhere.

12-22-2008, 09:27 AM	#26
Kodos Resident Alien Join Date: Jun 2001	So sorry to hear this. My thoughts will be with you and your family.

12-22-2008, 09:36 AM	#27
dolfin High School JV Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: Texas	My thoughts are with you and your family.

12-22-2008, 03:14 PM	#28
RainMaker General Manager Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Chicago, IL	I'm very sorry to hear about this. I can't fathom what you're going through and don't know how I'd handle a similar situation. You're in my thoughts.

12-22-2008, 03:52 PM	#29
CamEdwards Stadium Announcer Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Burke, VA	I'd like to echo the thoughts and prayers that others have mentioned here. I'm going through something similar with my own mother right now, and I can tell you that if there is a blessing in all of this, it's that you are with her physically right now. I hope that the remaining days are filled with love, even if it doesn't ease the heartache. __________________ I don't want the world. I just want your half.

12-22-2008, 04:03 PM	#30
MikeVic Head Coach Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Hometown of Canada

01-08-2009, 06:06 PM	#31
TCY Junkie College Prospect Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: TX	Thanks everyone, I felt I needed to let you guys know I appreciated it. I posted that on Saturday and the doctor gave her blood just so she could make the ride home on Friday. He heard my sister was flying in or wouldn't have gave her any. She did better until Sunday night. Monday she said she wasn't in pain but obvious she was going down hill quick. Tuesday around noon she went to sleep and didn't wake up. Christmas Eve at 3 a.m. was about the time it was official. It was so quick, I think it was for the best. She didn't want to suffer. She was amazing. Monday she barely had any energy, but when she heard my dad crying in another room. She looked very alert and said looking into my eyes "I don't know what to do". That close to death and all she cared about was him. I will try to make her proud. __________________ I try to open things I probably have no chance of opening.

01-08-2009, 09:03 PM	#32
MizzouRah Hall Of Famer Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Troy, Mo	Sad TCY... I'm sure you have already made her proud.

01-09-2009, 06:44 AM	#33
Butter Coordinator Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Dayton, OH	Sincerely sorry for your loss. __________________ My listening habits

01-09-2009, 07:54 AM	#34
ISiddiqui Hall Of Famer Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Decatur, GA	Sorry to hear about your mother's passing. __________________ "A prayer for the wild at heart, kept in cages" -Tennessee Williams

01-09-2009, 08:12 AM	#35
Mizzou B-ball fan General Manager Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Kansas City, MO	Our family had a extremely similar scenario in September. Mother in law reached a point where we finally took her home. While it's tough now, you'll be relieved going forward that: A) It went relatively quickly. Prolonged death is difficult on family. B) You and your family were there with her. Regret about not being there when they pass away is pretty common. You'll be thankful that you were there for her. Best wished moving forward and be sure to keep your dad as active and involved with family/friends as you possibly can. We've done that with my wife's father and it really does help them cope.

01-09-2009, 08:44 AM	#36
Toddzilla Pro Starter Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Burke, VA	You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers. Peace be with you.