40-year old coach weds 16-year old girl

[Young Drachma]

Story

The Hagers are trying to figure out how life went off track for their teenage daughter, Windy.

They envisioned that life for the good student and promising athlete would be filled with dreams of the prom and college, but that all changed this week when Windy, 16, married her high school track coach.

"She was a dream kid," said her mother, Betty Hager. "We'd never have to worry about Windy trying to get by with something."

At South Brunswick High School in North Carolina, Windy's greatest passion was track and field.

"She just always was outside, always running, and her name's Windy I guess she was predestined to do love to do that," Betty said.

But that passion led her down a troubling path.

Special Attention From Coach

During Windy's freshman year, her 38-year-old track coach, Brenton Wuchae, began taking a more active interest in her, offering to give the 14-year-old rides home from practice.

"He just seemed like a genuine guy, like he was there for the kids," said Windy's father, Dennis Hager.

But the Hagers eventually grew uneasy. Their phone bills showed text messages between Wuchae and Windy as late as 2 a.m.

They also discovered worrying e-mails. In one, Windy wrote to a friend, "I don't care to look at anyone other than him. He is the apple of my eye, I've never felt this way for someone, but I just don't want to lose him because of my parents' power trips."

The Hagers confronted Wuchae.

"He assured me there was nothing like that going on, [and that] they were just friends. His intentions were purely appropriate," Dennis said.

Not satisfied with that answer, the Hagers turned to the school district, which spoke to the coach.

The principal of the high school wrote to the Hagers, "I have seen nothing but a cooperative attitude from the teacher, and to the best of my knowledge, he has not had any contact with Windy since then."

"School officials can't be responsible for what happens the other hours of the day, and I would think the relationship developed much more outside of school," said Brian Shaw, an attorney for the school district.

The Hagers contacted police; they even tried to get a restraining order.

"We've tried everybody. We've been to the law. We've been to the school board," Betty said. "Our family has come and tried to talk to her. We've had people on the phone with her for hours family, friends. We've been to our pastor asking for guidance. We've been to his pastor."

Meanwhile, the Hagers say Windy withdrew, refusing to speak to them until she asked them to sign a consent form so that she and her coach a man more than twice her age could get married.

Although anguished, her weary parents gave in.

"Signing those consent forms was the hardest thing I did in my whole life, but we had to move on, it was going to kill us all," Dennis said.

Monday, Windy and Wuchae married, and he resigned from the school.

But was Windy really old enough to understand her decision? Experts say it's a difficult situation.

"With most teenagers, they're not sure yet who's who and what's what and what should be done," said Henry Paul, author of the book "Is My Teenager OK?" "It's obviously up to the adult figure to set the boundaries."

Windy and her new husband would not comment for this story, but the Hagers realize what they've lost.

"She could have done anything," Betty said. "She could have set the world on fire. She threw it all away."

[Young Drachma]

What happened to when parents told their kids not to go out and be home or else? And why let her marry him if she's destroying her life? To formalize her silliness?

[ISiddiqui]

Why in the Hell did they sign those consent forms?! I realize it was tough that their daughter wouldn't speak to them, but for God's sake, think about what is best in the long term. She's 16, FFS... by 18 (I assume that's legal age) she may realize how silly she was.

[MikeVic]

Yeah, that's dumb. Why sign the consent forms? I also found the sample e-mail they quoted to be worded kinda different for how I thought 16-year-olds wrote e-mails to friends.

[Mustang]

Originally Posted by MikeVic

Yeah, that's dumb. Why sign the consent forms? I also found the sample e-mail they quoted to be worded kinda different for how I thought 16-year-olds wrote e-mails to friends.

Who the hell uses apple of my eye anymore???

Maybe 8PP!3 of my I...

[SackAttack]

Three things.

1) If this was a case of 'Wendy, but wait, let's make it *special* and name her 'Windy' instead," then I can't help but feel like they got the karmic kick in the ass that parents like that deserve.

2) The hell? When did 'no' become a forbidden word when dealing with your children?

3) He resigned, rather than get fired. So now she's married this jobless dude, and if he's a track coach, I have to wonder what his job prospects look like. Is he even hireable material at a school again?

[Young Drachma]

Originally Posted by SackAttack

2) The hell? When did 'no' become a forbidden word when dealing with your children?

Word.

[Young Drachma]

I wonder how good she must've been if he told her "no baby, you're so good that you should be running laps around my house getting the laundry, rather than on the track."

Some coach.

[Maple Leafs]

This thread needs pictures of that pole vaulter chick.

[sabotai]

Originally Posted by SackAttack

Three things.

1) If this was a case of 'Wendy, but wait, let's make it *special* and name her 'Windy' instead," then I can't help but feel like they got the karmic kick in the ass that parents like that deserve.

The day you name your kid after the weather forecast is the day things start tuning bad for your kid.

[TroyF]

I saw this story today and about threw up. What twisted parents and what a sick bastard track coach that guy is. Signing the consent forms? I wouldn't sign a damned thing, but I would be kicking someones ass.

[MikeVic]

Originally Posted by sabotai

The day you name your kid after the weather forecast is the day things start tuning bad for your kid.

Or a fruit or vegetable I think.

[SackAttack]

Originally Posted by MikeVic

Or a fruit or vegetable I think.

Yeah. That Strawberry Shortcake was seriously fucked in the head, man.

[oliegirl]

I know of a family that went through something similar. As a junior in HS their daughter started dating the track coach at her Catholic School...it went on for over a year until the school found out and fired him. They continued to see each other, she ended up graduating and going on to college, still seeing him. Got pregnant, they got married and now have 4 kids, they've been together for 17 or 18 years now. The age difference wasn't as big, I think he's only 8 or 10 years older than her, but still...the family was devastated. They came around eventually and all get along now, but it was very rough for a good 3 - 5 years.

Ironically, about 4 or 5 years ago the parents split and the mother became a lesbian, dating and living with a woman named Frost, who supposedly "recruited" her into the lifestyle.

[mckerney]

Originally Posted by sabotai

The day you name your kid after the weather forecast is the day things start tuning bad for your kid.

It's getting worse than just weather forcasts too...

[Eaglesfan27]

Originally Posted by TroyF

I saw this story today and about threw up. What twisted parents and what a sick bastard track coach that guy is. Signing the consent forms? I wouldn't sign a damned thing, but I would be kicking someones ass.

Ditto that. I can't imagine ever being so "tired" or worn down that I would ever sign a consent form for my 16 year old daughter to marry anyone, particularly a man well over twice her age.

[timmynausea]

Originally Posted by oliegirl

Ironically, about 4 or 5 years ago the parents split and the mother became a lesbian, dating and living with a woman named Frost, who supposedly "recruited" her into the lifestyle.

This is exactly why I never let my mom or girlfriend watch American Gladiators.

[CraigSca]

She's probably peekin' out from under a stairway, calling a name that's lighter than air, and bending down to give me a rainbow as we speak.

[CraigSca]

Originally Posted by oliegirl

and the mother became a lesbian, dating and living with a woman named Frost, who supposedly "recruited" her into the lifestyle.

I wonder what pitch Frost used? Team prestige? Playing time?

[bulletsponge]

"ruining your life" is the most overused statement ever. haveing a kid at a young age isnt ruining your life. getting married at a young age isnt ruining it. going to jail isnt ruining it. and not going to college isnt ruining a life



but naming your child Windy or after a fruit or landmark will ruin it

[Axxon]

Originally Posted by oliegirl

I know of a family that went through something similar. As a junior in HS their daughter started dating the track coach at her Catholic School...it went on for over a year until the school found out and fired him. They continued to see each other, she ended up graduating and going on to college, still seeing him. Got pregnant, they got married and now have 4 kids, they've been together for 17 or 18 years now. The age difference wasn't as big, I think he's only 8 or 10 years older than her, but still...the family was devastated. They came around eventually and all get along now, but it was very rough for a good 3 - 5 years.

Ironically, about 4 or 5 years ago the parents split and the mother became a lesbian, dating and living with a woman named Frost, who supposedly "recruited" her into the lifestyle.

I worked with a woman in South Carolina who got pregnant by her 30 year old boyfriend when she was 14 and they married. Her parents almost killed him but like these parents allowed the marriage though the families were estranged for a while.

When I knew her she was 30 and had 5 kids and still loved her husband and the families had reconciled . I'm not saying that this is a good thing but just saying, you never know. It's not anything I'd ever do but I'm far from someone who should be judging others personal decisions that don't affect my life in even a tangental way.

Of course, in the Carolinas there were a lot of marriages with big age differences so it's less socially taboo but she's the only one I was aware of who entered the relationship as a minor which is the actual issue here.

[Karlifornia]

Originally Posted by CraigSca

I wonder what pitch Frost used? Team prestige? Playing time?

Gold.

[Critch]

I used to work with a female who moved out of her parents house and moved in with one of her father's friends (former friends, I guess) on the day that she turned 16. They'd had a secret affair before she turned 16, her parents were shocked when she moved in with the guy, they had no idea.

I knew her a few years later, by then she was about 22-ish, he was in his 60's. When we met him the big shock was that it wasn't a Sean Connery type that had whisked away this youngster, but a little bald man with a huge beer-belly.

There's hope for us all

[M GO BLUE!!!]

Originally Posted by CraigSca

I wonder what pitch Frost used? Team prestige? Playing time?

My bet is a position change.

[Maple Leafs]

Originally Posted by Dark Cloud

The Hagers are trying to figure out how life went off track for their teenage daughter, Windy.

Originally Posted by oliegirl

... dating and living with a woman named Frost ...

I'm starting to have second thoughts about naming my daughter "Slushy Rain Blizzard",

[stevew]

Fuckin A, if some 36 year old ever tries to be too friendly with one of my girls, I will be kicking his fucking ass. Stupid parents though, no way in hell do I sign some consent form. I'd send her to military school first.

[TroyF]

Maybe it'll work, who the hell knows. But if it's the right thing for both of them, they could wait until she was 18 and finished HS. There is no way in hell I'd sign the consent forms.

You can't control what your kids do all the time. Sometimes saying no doesn't work. But when you compromise your values and sign something you don't believe in, it tells me a lot about the way you raised your kid to begin with.

[bulletsponge]

my guess is young girls that go for way older men are looking for a father because thier real one is lousy. but that might not be the case for all

[M GO BLUE!!!]

Originally Posted by bulletsponge

my guess is young girls that go for way older men are looking for a father because thier real one is lousy. but that might not be the case for all

Hey pal, don't go blaming us lousy fathers!

[bulletsponge]

Originally Posted by M GO BLUE!!!

Hey pal, don't go blaming us lousy fathers!

you have a teenage daughter? hmmm... pic plz

[Izulde]

FWIW, I don't find anything wrong with the age difference here... I do think, however, that they should've waited.

The more and more time I spend in college, the more and more I realize that it's often not until the mid 20s that women figure their shit out.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

Originally Posted by bulletsponge

you have a teenage daughter? hmmm... pic plz

14

I would treat you as a passenger in a Texas automobile...

[bulletsponge]

Originally Posted by M GO BLUE!!!

14

I would treat you as a passenger in a Texas automobile...

ok, call me when she turns 18

[Fouts]

My daughter is 12. If this happens in the next 4 years, I will take her phone and move her to another school. I would then tell her that if they kept in contact after that, I would notify the school system and police. At 18 she can decide who she wants to marry.

[kingnebwsu]

Originally Posted by CraigSca

She's probably peekin' out from under a stairway, calling a name that's lighter than air, and bending down to give me a rainbow as we speak.

Everyone knows it's Windy

[st.cronin]

Originally Posted by CraigSca

I wonder what pitch Frost used? Team prestige? Playing time?

Style of play.

[mckerney]

Originally Posted by st.cronin

Style of play.

Offensive formation?

[Oilers9911]

Originally Posted by Izulde

FWIW, I don't find anything wrong with the age difference here... I do think, however, that they should've waited.

Nothing wrong with a 40 year old man and a 16 year old girl? Yikes.

[cougarfreak]

Originally Posted by Fouts

My daughter is 12. If this happens in the next 4 years, I will take her phone and move her to another school. I would then tell her that if they kept in contact after that, I would notify the school system and police. At 18 she can decide who she wants to marry.

I wouldn't wait, I'd call police immediately.

[st.cronin]

Originally Posted by mckerney

Offensive formation?

Smashmouth.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

Originally Posted by bulletsponge

ok, call me when she turns 18

Sure thing, but you probably won't like what I'll call you!

By the way... how's your mom these days?

[bulletsponge]

Originally Posted by M GO BLUE!!!

Sure thing, but you probably won't like what I'll call you!

By the way... how's your mom these days?

ok no more joking about daughters or mothers

[dervack]

Originally Posted by Oilers9911

Nothing wrong with a 40 year old man and a 16 year old girl? Yikes.

Does that surprise anyone?

[Vinatieri for Prez]

What? No one is a fan of true love anymore?

[Young Drachma]

Originally Posted by Oilers9911

Nothing wrong with a 40 year old man and a 16 year old girl? Yikes.

lol. I saw this too and was like, huh?

[Maple Leafs]

Originally Posted by Vinatieri for Prez

What? No one is a fan of true love anymore?

Chmura for Prez?

[Axxon]

Originally Posted by Oilers9911

Nothing wrong with a 40 year old man and a 16 year old girl? Yikes.

Most likely he's saying what I was saying, it's not the age difference ( 24 years ) that's an issue. The age of the child is an issue but he's not really saying it isn't nor is he saying that a 40 year old and a 16 year old should hook up but that there is no problem if a 25 year old hooks up with a 49 year old.

At least that's how I read his post.

[Anthony]

whilst watching some pornography, i got to thinking: if you marry a girl whose mom is single, and your single dad marries your wife's mom - does that make your wife's mom your stepmom-in-law?

[ThunderingHERD]

Originally Posted by Axxon

Most likely he's saying what I was saying, it's not the age difference ( 24 years ) that's an issue. The age of the child is an issue but he's not really saying it isn't nor is he saying that a 40 year old and a 16 year old should hook up but that there is no problem if a 25 year old hooks up with a 49 year old.

At least that's how I read his post.

I read it as : "I wish there were 16-year-old girls willing to f*ck me. Or any girls for that matter."

[Axxon]

Originally Posted by ThunderingHERD

I read it as : "I wish there were 16-year-old girls willing to f*ck me. Or any girls for that matter."

Harsh interpretation.

Of course, if the poster was 16 too...