40-year old coach weds 16-year old girl

[Izulde]

Originally Posted by Axxon

Most likely he's saying what I was saying, it's not the age difference ( 24 years ) that's an issue. The age of the child is an issue but he's not really saying it isn't nor is he saying that a 40 year old and a 16 year old should hook up but that there is no problem if a 25 year old hooks up with a 49 year old.

At least that's how I read his post.

Correct. At least somebody around here can read an entire post

[Izulde]

Originally Posted by ThunderingHERD

I read it as : "I wish there were 16-year-old girls willing to f*ck me. Or any girls for that matter."

You like to have a problem with me, don't you?

[Coop]

They look like they are related.

[Young Drachma]

I thought they looked related too.

I wonder where she'll finish high school. Kids are cruel, I'm sure they'll have all sorts of awful things to say to her.

[Izulde]

Originally Posted by Coop

They look like they are related.

Yeah when I saw that I'm like "... she must be drinking the BGH milk, cuz ain't no way she looks 16. That's some old balls shit right there."

[Vinatieri for Prez]

Hmm, something smells fishy there.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

Originally Posted by Dark Cloud

I thought they looked related too.

I wonder where she'll finish high school. Kids are cruel, I'm sure they'll have all sorts of awful things to say to her.

LOL... Like she'll finish high school... LOL

[sterlingice]

Originally Posted by Coop

They look like they are related.

Well, it is North Carolina...

SI

[ThunderingHERD]

I'm setting the over/under on a pregnancy at 6 months.

[QuikSand]

Originally Posted by ThunderingHERD

I'm setting the over/under on a pregnancy at 6 months.

Like my grandmother says, "Babies usually take nine months, but that first one can come any time!"

[Wolfpack]

Originally Posted by sterlingice

Well, it is North Carolina...

SI

Well...it's as close to South Carolina as you can get and still be in North Carolina.

[Young Drachma]

Judge dismisses parents' suit against school board, Wuchae | StarNewsOnline.com | Star-News | Wilmington, NC

No kid, still. Both work at supermarkets, but different ones.

[Tekneek]

This must be some of those "traditional values" the "sanctity of marriage" crowd has been holding onto so dearly in recent years.

[MylesKnight]

Coach must be a Vernon Dozier fan (character from the old school Phil Hendrie Show)... This story is absolutely robbed from the PHS.

[yacovfb]

Originally Posted by MylesKnight

Coach must be a Vernon Dozier fan (character from the old school Phil Hendrie Show)... This story is absolutely robbed from the PHS.

Now if this guy had a wife in a coma at the same time, then the similarities would be even eerier

[Galaxy]

Originally Posted by oliegirl

I know of a family that went through something similar. As a junior in HS their daughter started dating the track coach at her Catholic School...it went on for over a year until the school found out and fired him. They continued to see each other, she ended up graduating and going on to college, still seeing him. Got pregnant, they got married and now have 4 kids, they've been together for 17 or 18 years now. The age difference wasn't as big, I think he's only 8 or 10 years older than her, but still...the family was devastated. They came around eventually and all get along now, but it was very rough for a good 3 - 5 years.

Ironically, about 4 or 5 years ago the parents split and the mother became a lesbian, dating and living with a woman named Frost, who supposedly "recruited" her into the lifestyle.

A lady named Frost "recruited" her into the lifestyle?

[RainMaker]

The parents deserve some blame here too. The girl was 16. If I had a child predator after my kid, I would go toward two options.

1) Move as far away from there as possible.

2) Kill the guy

As a parent, it is your duty to protect your child. They didn't do that.

[The Afoci]

Originally Posted by Anthony

whilst watching some pornography, i got to thinking: if you marry a girl whose mom is single, and your single dad marries your wife's mom - does that make your wife's mom your stepmom-in-law?

1486450

[Axxon]

Originally Posted by RainMaker

The parents deserve some blame here too. The girl was 16. If I had a child predator after my kid, I would go toward two options.

1) Move as far away from there as possible.

2) Kill the guy

As a parent, it is your duty to protect your child. They didn't do that.

Good point. I mean, she's been with him for over a year and a half, is happy and continuing her education. In fact, she graduated early.

Who could possibly want such horror for their kids? Clearly she should have been protected from having a happy, adjusted life and her parents failed her miserably by allowing it.

[RainMaker]

Originally Posted by Axxon

Good point. I mean, she's been with him for over a year and a half, is happy and continuing her education. In fact, she graduated early.

Who could possibly want such horror for their kids? Clearly she should have been protected from having a happy, adjusted life and her parents failed her miserably by allowing it.

Her childhood was stolen from her. She doesn't attend school, doesn't walk down the aisle with her friends, and doesn't live the life of a 17 year old. She doesn't have the same opportunities they do.

The guy is a child predator who brainwashed a 14-year old girl. He used his position as an authority figure and teacher to violate her. It's a sick breach of trust and abuse of his power.

But if you think having middle age male teachers picking off kids at vulnerable ages is a good thing, so be it. I find it wrong and would make sure it never happened to my daughter.

[kingnebwsu]

Inappropriate time for a Quagmire "giggity giggity...all-right"?

[Izulde]

Originally Posted by RainMaker

Her childhood was stolen from her. She doesn't attend school, doesn't walk down the aisle with her friends, and doesn't live the life of a 17 year old. She doesn't have the same opportunities they do.

The guy is a child predator who brainwashed a 14-year old girl. He used his position as an authority figure and teacher to violate her. It's a sick breach of trust and abuse of his power.

But if you think having middle age male teachers picking off kids at vulnerable ages is a good thing, so be it. I find it wrong and would make sure it never happened to my daughter.

[Sgran]

What kind of name is Wuchae?

[flere-imsaho]

Originally Posted by Sgran

What kind of name is Wuchae?

The kind of name Sarah Palin would give to one of her kids.

[Samdari]

Originally Posted by Axxon

Good point. I mean, she's been with him for over a year and a half, is happy and continuing her education. In fact, she graduated early.

Who could possibly want such horror for their kids? Clearly she should have been protected from having a happy, adjusted life and her parents failed her miserably by allowing it.

While I don't think her childhood was stolen from her (she seemed quite eager to give it away) there is no way this would happen with my daughter.

You think this ends well for her? What happens when she gets to 24, and he starts scoping around for another 14 year old? Pedophiles tend not to find adult women attractive. When she stops looking young (i.e. teenaged), her happiness is pretty much over.

[Young Drachma]

Originally Posted by Sgran

What kind of name is Wuchae?

Well when your name is Windy, you're probably not in a position to judge.

[Flasch186]

Originally Posted by Samdari

While I don't think her childhood was stolen from her (she seemed quite eager to give it away) there is no way this would happen with my daughter.

You think this ends well for her? What happens when she gets to 24, and he starts scoping around for another 14 year old? Pedophiles tend not to find adult women attractive. When she stops looking young (i.e. teenaged), her happiness is pretty much over.

However, at 14, the girl looked like Jessica Rabbit so it's alllllllllll good.

[RainMaker]

Originally Posted by Samdari

While I don't think her childhood was stolen from her (she seemed quite eager to give it away) there is no way this would happen with my daughter.

You think this ends well for her? What happens when she gets to 24, and he starts scoping around for another 14 year old? Pedophiles tend not to find adult women attractive. When she stops looking young (i.e. teenaged), her happiness is pretty much over.

Wouldn't all 14 year olds give away their childhood if they could? If someone told you at 14 that you could sit around and play video games instead of going to school, would you? That's just an analogy, but my point is that a kid should not be responsible for ensuring they have a proper childhood. The parent should do everything they can to make sure their child grows up to be an adult which then can make decisions on their life.

I don't think it's a pedophilia thing for him, I think it's control. The girl did not look young. At 14 though, a guy can control and mold the girl into whatever he wants. She knows nothing about relationships. I'm certain he likes having that control over her and probably holds it over her head at all times. The problem she runs into is when she gets older, gets more mature, and starts acting out independently, he will move on. This is a guy who needs someone subservient.

The guy has to worry about what happens when she enters her prime in her 20's. Guys will be attracted to her, hit on her, and so on. She'll be going home to a guy closing in on 60 who isn't rich. He'll have to really control her and not let her out of the house to avoid issues or get her pregnant.

[Karlifornia]

Just reread the original article, and I must have missed the funniest line in the whole thing last time:

The Hagers are trying to figure out how life went off track for their teenage daughter, Windy.

I could take a guess.

[Groundhog]

Are people really defending the dude and their relationship? You spent much time around 14 or even 16 year olds lately? The guy groomed someone barely in her teens. Sick and disgusting.

A friend of mine had very nearly the exact same situation as this happen to her when she was 14 through 18, and I can tell you that even though she felt OK with it at the time, the effects of it on her now are much more dramatic.

[RendeR]

Rainmaker and groundhog, your arguments might be vastly more well accepted if you actually had any facts at all. Re read your posts and show evidence that anything you said is a fact.

You very well could be right, but you have no clue what the truth of the situation is, you're both assuming everything you say and while assumptions can be right, they most often end up being far off the mark.

I'd be very interested to see either of you actually IN this situation because I'm betting even money your reactions are completely different in reality than they are talking out your asses on a message board.


Personally, I don't see how the parents could really have done anything that wouldn't have destroyed their family entirely.

The daughter wanted this, period, she needed permission. I'm assuming (dangerous as I said) that she flatly told them either you sign the paper or I'm gone, that simple. Its the only real reason I can see for them to have agreed without a lot more disturbance to the family.

When you're left with the choice of allowing your daughter to marry the man she is actively choosing to be in a relatoinship with or losing her altogether, I don't think you choose the latter. I think you cave your ass in and keep your faily close in the hopes that you're wrong about the guy and things work out, and if they don't you're there and available to save the day.

All this black n white BS you guys are spouting is ignorant posturing.

[Groundhog]

Well, I do have some facts actually RendeR. Namely, the person I commented on. It wasn't a coach but a family friend, and outside of that the story is remarkably similar.

I'm not blaming the parents because, yeah, they were given an ultimatum (again, the very same one my friend gave her parents), and obviously you choose your daughter, again as my friend's parents did. I place my blame squarely with the coach.

My point is that 14 year olds are very vulnerable and easily swayed. It doesn't matter if the girl in the story was in love with this guy, he pursued a vulnerable girl barely in her teens - someone he should not have any interest in what-so-ever.

[RendeR]

Originally Posted by Groundhog

Well, I do have some facts actually RendeR. Namely, the person I commented on. It wasn't a coach but a family friend, and outside of that the story is remarkably similar.

I'm not blaming the parents because, yeah, they were given an ultimatum (again, the very same one my friend gave her parents), and obviously you choose your daughter, again as my friend's parents did. I place my blame squarely with the coach.

My point is that 14 year olds are very vulnerable and easily swayed. It doesn't matter if the girl in the story was in love with this guy, he pursued a vulnerable girl barely in her teens - someone he should not have any interest in what-so-ever.

Again, you're assuming. If what you assume here is true, you're absolutely right and I agree totally, however you do not KNOW this. She could well have been the one doing the persuing, she may well have been behind the entire relationship and pushed him for it.

That is precisely what happened in MY ihgh school with a classmate. The only difference being my classmate was bright enough to wait till she was 18 to actually marry the teacher.

As I said above, I don't know if you're right or wrong, but you can't state things as factual about something you don't know. We can assume all we want, the only ones that know what really happened are currently married and seemingly content for the time being.

All this railing thats been going on (not nearly so much from you as Rainmaker) is just so much worthless posturing.

I'm not against stating our opinions here, but try and stay rational about it (again more RM than you, you sorta got lumped in by the timing of your posts hehee).

[RainMaker]

Originally Posted by RendeR

Rainmaker and groundhog, your arguments might be vastly more well accepted if you actually had any facts at all. Re read your posts and show evidence that anything you said is a fact.

You very well could be right, but you have no clue what the truth of the situation is, you're both assuming everything you say and while assumptions can be right, they most often end up being far off the mark.

I'd be very interested to see either of you actually IN this situation because I'm betting even money your reactions are completely different in reality than they are talking out your asses on a message board.


Personally, I don't see how the parents could really have done anything that wouldn't have destroyed their family entirely.

The daughter wanted this, period, she needed permission. I'm assuming (dangerous as I said) that she flatly told them either you sign the paper or I'm gone, that simple. Its the only real reason I can see for them to have agreed without a lot more disturbance to the family.

When you're left with the choice of allowing your daughter to marry the man she is actively choosing to be in a relatoinship with or losing her altogether, I don't think you choose the latter. I think you cave your ass in and keep your faily close in the hopes that you're wrong about the guy and things work out, and if they don't you're there and available to save the day.

All this black n white BS you guys are spouting is ignorant posturing.

I'll assume you don't have a daughter. Because I have a feeling if a 40-year old man was screwing your 14-year old daughter, you'd probably be singing a different tune.

And from my understanding, the daughter was 16 years old at the time of marriage. Too young to marry on her own without parental permission. At 16 years old, they are still under your control. The parents should have demanded the man leave their daughter alone. If he wouldn't, they should have moved far away.

As for the daughters wishes, tough shit. She's 16. I wanted to be able to stay out all night when I was 16 but wasn't allowed to. The ultimate goal as parents is to protect your child and make the best decisions for them regardless of impact on your relationship. If the daughter chose never to speak to them again, so be it. But they would have protected their daughter from a child predator.

The only thing ignorant in this thread is people making excuses for letting their child marry a sexual predator because they don't want to hurt the kid's feelings.

[RainMaker]

Originally Posted by RendeR

Again, you're assuming. If what you assume here is true, you're absolutely right and I agree totally, however you do not KNOW this. She could well have been the one doing the persuing, she may well have been behind the entire relationship and pushed him for it.

It doesn't matter. If an 8 year old girl has a crush on her 3rd grade teacher, should her parents let him fuck her? The "she persued it" is the excuse every pedophile makes.

A 14 year old girl is vulnerable and in no way can make decisions like this. They in no way can handle being in a relationship with a middle aged man. Their minds are simply not developed enough.

What I'm saying is that it doesn't matter what the child wants. It's the parents job to protect the child regardless of her wants and desires.

[RendeR]

Originally Posted by RainMaker

I'll assume you don't have a daughter. Because I have a feeling if a 40-year old man was screwing your 14-year old daughter, you'd probably be singing a different tune.

And from my understanding, the daughter was 16 years old at the time of marriage. Too young to marry on her own without parental permission. At 16 years old, they are still under your control. The parents should have demanded the man leave their daughter alone. If he wouldn't, they should have moved far away.

As for the daughters wishes, tough shit. She's 16. I wanted to be able to stay out all night when I was 16 but wasn't allowed to. The ultimate goal as parents is to protect your child and make the best decisions for them regardless of impact on your relationship. If the daughter chose never to speak to them again, so be it. But they would have protected their daughter from a child predator.

The only thing ignorant in this thread is people making excuses for letting their child meet a sexual predator because they don't want to hurt the kid's feelings.

Ihave 2 daughters, 16 and 4, so, umm, perhaps you ought to back up a step or ten.

A) again you don't KNOW wether this was a case of a predator chasing after the girl or the girl becoming obsessed with him.

B) You honestly believe that destroying your family is the best way to protect your daughter? If your 16 yr old told you "sign this so I can have what I want or I'll leave and go somewhere where you can't stop me" You'd actually call her bluff?

right. See grouhdhog's example for just how common that part might be.

You're right, I'd be fighting tooth and nail to protect my daughter, I'd know more about the guy than he remembers about himself and if I found anything dangerous or deviant I'd hand all that info to the police. But when it comes down to it if *I* have done my job properly to begin with, my daughter will be smart enough and strong enough in herself and I would probably sign the paper.

I'd rather have my daughter around, and have mistakes happen and be there when things go wrong than destroy my entire family trying to dominate her into submission.

totalitarian parenting fails, pretty much always. It creates drones and ignorant human beings who fall into even worse predicaments. Teach the kids to judge right and wrong, teach them to respect their elders and include them in their lives so that when some freakish thing like this relationship hapens they have the support they need to figure out what is right for them.

Now groundhog stated he entirely blames the coach. I disagree. I blame both the coach and the parents.

The parents for not doing a very good job of teaching the kid how to be responsible about herself and her future, and the coach for not saying "look, if this is RREALY what you want, talk to me when you turn 18"

If its meant to be it will be, if its not, its going to fail anyway. So far they seem to be fine and none of our blowing about it matters in any event.


Now please note, I am only offering the other possiblities here to the one you are railing so loudly about. You may in fact be right on the button, but you just don't KNOW that. you're not the kid, you're (hopefully) not the coach. So everything you've railed on about is so much hot air guesswork. just as mine is.

All I really ask is that you chill out a bit when you post it. The extremism you posture with is just ridiculous.

[Noop]

In the eyes of the government your an adult at 18. Anything under that means your under someone's supervision and guidance. If I have a daughter who is 16 wanting to date a grown man I would tell her wait until she is 18 then she can do what she pleases.

If we become estranged so be it.

[RainMaker]

Originally Posted by RendeR

Ihave 2 daughters, 16 and 4, so, umm, perhaps you ought to back up a step or ten.

A) again you don't KNOW wether this was a case of a predator chasing after the girl or the girl becoming obsessed with him.

B) You honestly believe that destroying your family is the best way to protect your daughter? If your 16 yr old told you "sign this so I can have what I want or I'll leave and go somewhere where you can't stop me" You'd actually call her bluff?

right. See grouhdhog's example for just how common that part might be.

You're right, I'd be fighting tooth and nail to protect my daughter, I'd know more about the guy than he remembers about himself and if I found anything dangerous or deviant I'd hand all that info to the police. But when it comes down to it if *I* have done my job properly to begin with, my daughter will be smart enough and strong enough in herself and I would probably sign the paper.

I'd rather have my daughter around, and have mistakes happen and be there when things go wrong than destroy my entire family trying to dominate her into submission.

totalitarian parenting fails, pretty much always. It creates drones and ignorant human beings who fall into even worse predicaments. Teach the kids to judge right and wrong, teach them to respect their elders and include them in their lives so that when some freakish thing like this relationship hapens they have the support they need to figure out what is right for them.

Now groundhog stated he entirely blames the coach. I disagree. I blame both the coach and the parents.

The parents for not doing a very good job of teaching the kid how to be responsible about herself and her future, and the coach for not saying "look, if this is RREALY what you want, talk to me when you turn 18"

If its meant to be it will be, if its not, its going to fail anyway. So far they seem to be fine and none of our blowing about it matters in any event.


Now please note, I am only offering the other possiblities here to the one you are railing so loudly about. You may in fact be right on the button, but you just don't KNOW that. you're not the kid, you're (hopefully) not the coach. So everything you've railed on about is so much hot air guesswork. just as mine is.

All I really ask is that you chill out a bit when you post it. The extremism you posture with is just ridiculous.

We have different views then. There is no way I'd ever sign my child over to a sexual predator. I don't care if she hates me the rest of my life. Her safety would be the utmost importance to me.

I don't know if you can blame the parents for their daughter falling for the guy. You have teenage daughters, so you know how things are with them. Each boyfriend is "the one". Each bit of drama in their life is blown way out of proportion with them. They are learning to adjust to becoming an adult and their bodies and minds are changing. They are overly emotional, brash, and don't think things all the way through. Their brains are simply not built at that age to comprehend the consequences of what they are doing.

[RainMaker]

I think the thing that bothers me the most about this story is his relation to the girl. You are supposed to trust coaches and teachers with your child. They have a big impact on their lives and they earn a lot of trust from them. He took advantage of that trust and his relationship to her.

[Noop]

Originally Posted by RainMaker

I think the thing that bothers me the most about this story is his relation to the girl. You are supposed to trust coaches and teachers with your child. They have a big impact on their lives and they earn a lot of trust from them. He took advantage of that trust and his relationship to her.

+1

[Izulde]

Originally Posted by RainMaker

And from my understanding, the daughter was 16 years old at the time of marriage. Too young to marry on her own without parental permission.

Depends on state law.

[Izulde]

Originally Posted by RainMaker

It doesn't matter. If an 8 year old girl has a crush on her 3rd grade teacher, should her parents let him fuck her? The "she persued it" is the excuse every pedophile makes.

A 14 year old girl is vulnerable and in no way can make decisions like this. They in no way can handle being in a relationship with a middle aged man. Their minds are simply not developed enough.

What I'm saying is that it doesn't matter what the child wants. It's the parents job to protect the child regardless of her wants and desires.

You're also confusing pedophilia with enebophilia (sp). They're -NOT- the same thing.

[Young Drachma]

Originally Posted by Izulde

You're also confusing pedophilia with enebophilia (sp). They're -NOT- the same thing.

See atheism/agnosticism thread for similar discussion.

[Young Drachma]

Originally Posted by Izulde

You're also confusing pedophilia with enebophilia (sp). They're -NOT- the same thing.

For the uninitiated, apparently ebophilia pertains to postpubescent children under the legal age of consent. I didn't realize there was a distinction and I'm not sure it matters. There is barely anything Googleable on the subject and for good reason, I suspect. I suspect a pedophile came up with the term. (I'm being over the top here, but...at the same time...)

It's one thing when say, a 22-year old is carousing with a 16 year old versus say, a person in a position of authority who uses said power to cultivate a relationship with a student.

[Young Drachma]

It wasn't her decision to make. She made it, mind you, but I don't think it was. I think he's handled it better than a lot of folks might have and I'm sure he really thinks he loves her or whatever have you. But she's been denied what he was given. A chance to go to college, to be young, single and to figure out life on her own.

If he really "loved her" or whatever, he'd have backed the hell off, supported her as a coach, made sure she got to go to a great school and supported her all of the way through that. If she decided she wanted to come after being an adult and do something different, when then I guess that's her decision at that point.

But to be a kid and make that decision, seems derelict on his part. I don't really care what the circumstances are...it's not okay. It's happened and like I said, at least she's not pregnant or anything...but I don't think there is any sort of manner in which he can call what he's done defensible.

The fact that he's NOT in jail is pretty outstanding.


This guy was a lot younger, did the same thing (though he wasn't her coach...) got the girl pregnant, married her and was sent to jail.

Different state and all and there is no indication in this case that they had sex before they got married...but...still.

[Axxon]

Originally Posted by Samdari

While I don't think her childhood was stolen from her (she seemed quite eager to give it away) there is no way this would happen with my daughter.

You think this ends well for her? What happens when she gets to 24, and he starts scoping around for another 14 year old? Pedophiles tend not to find adult women attractive. When she stops looking young (i.e. teenaged), her happiness is pretty much over.

One, dude's not a pedophile. He's an ephebophile. Of course, it doesn't sound as nasty and icky as the truly abhorant pedophile so the "Oh noes, think of the children!" crowd call anyone who finds anyone under 18 attractive?

The girl was 16 years old, far more approaching the physical state of womanhood than the precious state of childhood. In many, many, many states she has the right to marry and the right to emancipate herself from her family. Far different than the helpless child that you are painting her.

So, are you ready to still contend that a ephebophile follows the exact same traits in regards to his/her sexual condition? Please note, ephebophilia is rarely regarded as a mental disorder unless it affects the ephebophile's life in a destructive way.

I understand protecting children and to some degree late adolescents but fuck, if this was always the case I wouldn't even be here because my great grandmother was GASP 16 when she got married. I'm betting a lot of us wouldn't be here so understand when I say a hearty fuck you here.

I just wanted to clear up what really bothers me which is the vilifying of certain things by labeling them something they're not that's worse. Got a problem with ephebophiles? Let me hear 'em. Please quote sites that support your position.

Actually, I'd really love to hear Eaglesfan27's take on this considering this is right in his specialty. I'll take a post of his as a valid cite.

Ephebophilia

hxxp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ephebophilia

[Axxon]

Originally Posted by RainMaker

I don't think it's a pedophilia thing for him, I think it's control. The girl did not look young. At 14 though, a guy can control and mold the girl into whatever he wants. She knows nothing about relationships. I'm certain he likes having that control over her and probably holds it over her head at all times. The problem she runs into is when she gets older, gets more mature, and starts acting out independently, he will move on. This is a guy who needs someone subservient.

The guy has to worry about what happens when she enters her prime in her 20's. Guys will be attracted to her, hit on her, and so on. She'll be going home to a guy closing in on 60 who isn't rich. He'll have to really control her and not let her out of the house to avoid issues or get her pregnant.

That is something I believe is pretty much far more likely a motivation for but again, I wouldn't rule out that he may have been socially stunted in some way and feels far more comfortable with a younger girl who is as lacking in social skills as he is and one day, when she outgrows him, she'll dump his ass.

[Axxon]

Originally Posted by RainMaker

The guy has to worry about what happens when she enters her prime in her 20's. Guys will be attracted to her, hit on her, and so on. She'll be going home to a guy closing in on 60 who isn't rich. He'll have to really control her and not let her out of the house to avoid issues or get her pregnant.

This part though had me laughing. I mean, fuck man, you can't ever be wrong until one of them dies. I can see it.

Well, yeah, they stuck together but when she hits 60 he'll be 84 and there's no way he can keep her then unless he chains her ass to his walker.

Face it, all of this is conjecture ( even if it's a likelyhood of being true ) and the only fact we know is a year and a half in, they're still together and doing fine.

That's what brought me to post in this thread yesterday. Fact is, you have the future that can make you never wrong but right now, the present says it worked out for her. It's a strange world we lived in. If only every single situation would just go exactly the same way every time. That would be so much easier.

[Axxon]

Originally Posted by Groundhog

Well, I do have some facts actually RendeR. Namely, the person I commented on. It wasn't a coach but a family friend, and outside of that the story is remarkably similar.

I'm not blaming the parents because, yeah, they were given an ultimatum (again, the very same one my friend gave her parents), and obviously you choose your daughter, again as my friend's parents did. I place my blame squarely with the coach.

My point is that 14 year olds are very vulnerable and easily swayed. It doesn't matter if the girl in the story was in love with this guy, he pursued a vulnerable girl barely in her teens - someone he should not have any interest in what-so-ever.

Anectdote != data.

Just sayin.

[Axxon]

Originally Posted by RainMaker

It doesn't matter. If an 8 year old girl has a crush on her 3rd grade teacher, should her parents let him fuck her? The "she persued it" is the excuse every pedophile makes.

A 14 year old girl is vulnerable and in no way can make decisions like this. They in no way can handle being in a relationship with a middle aged man. Their minds are simply not developed enough.

What I'm saying is that it doesn't matter what the child wants. It's the parents job to protect the child regardless of her wants and desires.

The hyperbole has gotten extreme now. You see no difference between the protection needs of an 8 year old and a 16 year old? Really, can you say that with a straight face?