And you thought you were having a bad weekend.

Samdari · 11-08-2003, 02:16 PM

This will make not having FOF2004 not seem so bad.

I have been looking forward to making a big announcement here, as my wife had tested positive on about 6 home pregnancy tests (we like to be certain) a month ago. We had been once to the doctor, and seen a heartbeat, but were told that it was not as far along as certain biological indicators would normally suggest. We went back yesterday for the standard 8 week appointment.

No heartbeat.

I did not understand what this meant for a few minutes, thinking that it meant we would have to come back, and then the doctor is talking about scheduling a procedure to clean things up, and what this means for future attempts (luckily, not disastrous). Then realization hits me like a ton of bricks: it's over. A hastily arranged appointment in another office later in the day confirms the bad news.

On second thought, I would not mind having FOF2004, just to occupy my mind. But, the lack of demo/release is not the worst thing to happen to me this weekend.

vtbub · 11-08-2003, 02:18 PM

Deepest condolences

Ron

wbonnell · 11-08-2003, 02:32 PM

Sorry to hear that. Personally, I've been through the same thing more than once. All I can say is don't give up hope; the next time is likely to be just fine.

Draft Dodger · 11-08-2003, 02:32 PM

very sorry, although words can't really express it properly.

mtaystl03 · 11-08-2003, 02:34 PM

Sorry to hear that. Good luck to you.

Noop · 11-08-2003, 02:38 PM

PilotMan · 11-08-2003, 02:45 PM

Its very hard to express to others how it feels to go through what you are going through. I have been lucky to have 2 healthy happy boys, but we also have had to go through a miscarrige. It was early and we never got the closeness of hearing the heartbeat. My wife has had to endure the heartache of 2 others. One that was beaten out of her when she was a teenager. I really, really feel for you and my thoughts are with you.

Glengoyne · 11-08-2003, 02:51 PM

I am so very sorry Samdari. My wife and I went through almost the exact same thing about six months ago. The first visit, heartbeat, but also told that things were not so far along as thought. When my wife went back a few weeks later, she was told there was no heartbeat, and that the fetus was non-viable. It, as you said, took us like a ton of bricks. All the hopes we had invested were suddenly gone. Telling familly and friends was brutal, especially our 3 year old. She just couldn't figure out why we were crying.

Our doctor told us then that this happens in something like 20% of all pregnancies. As we have shared with our friends, it seems much more common than I ever would have imagined. It almost assuredly means nothing regarding your future chances at conception. All of our friends who shared their experiences with this all have children now, and my wife and I are already expecting again. Our doctor said there was no need to wait, and said that with my wifes hormones at elevated levels, the fields were fertile so to speak.

My wife went through a lot of emotions. From wanting to try again immediately, to wondering whether she wanted another child at all. There was also a share of guilt. "did I do something to cause this?", "Was it that glass of wine?". I just kept going back to "something wasn't right, that is all it was. Something completely beyond our control".

When we went back in for the first ultrasound for this pregnancy at 8 weeks, it was a very tense time. For us, things are looking good this time around.

I am sorry I rambled on. Really I was just wanting to say that I know a little of what you are going through, and that there is light at the end of the proverbial tunnel.

cody8200 · 11-08-2003, 03:11 PM

I'm extremely sorry to hear that Samdari. It does put a silly thing like a game release in perspective on a matter of importance.

MizzouRah · 11-08-2003, 03:42 PM

That's more than a bad weekend.

I'm really sorry to hear news like this and hope your wife is ok as well as yourself.

Todd

FrogMan · 11-08-2003, 04:06 PM

Sad, sad news indeed...

I'll keep you in my thoughts, with all the best wishes for your future pregnancies...

FM

Eaglesfan27 · 11-08-2003, 04:26 PM

I'm very sorry to hear your news. Unfortunately, many pregnancies (definitely over 20%) are believed to end in miscarriage. Often, the miscarriage occurs before the couple even know they are pregnant and it just appears as a particularly heavy period. Of course, it is much more tragic when the couple knows about it and is making preparations. My condolescences.

tucker342 · 11-08-2003, 07:28 PM

sabotai · 11-08-2003, 08:04 PM

FWIW, my sister-in-law went through the same thing. She lost her baby. To go from the beginning straight to the end, my niece just turned 3 years old.

Ben E Lou · 11-08-2003, 08:57 PM

Samdari:

I wish I had words. "I am so sorry" sounds trite. I pray that somehow God would be able to comfort you and your wife.

--Ben

Ksyrup · 11-08-2003, 09:06 PM

My deepest condolences. Considering my wife is 12 weeks pregnant right now, and we've gotten into the pre-planning phase pretty heavily, I can't imagine how you must feel right now, yet it hits quite close to home. Everything's OK here so far, but you never know. You and your family are in my prayers.

Samdari · 11-09-2003, 08:56 AM

Thanks to everyone who responded, and those who sent a PM. There is little to console us right now, but having guys take the time to type any words of encouragement really does help. Some of you seem worried about not finding the right words. There are none, but you'd be surprised how far "sorry, dude" goes. Mrs. Sam has read this thread as well, and was overwhelmed, so I want to thank you all for giving her a brief smile (and making her cry again, but that cannot be helped).

I had no idea how common this was, and we are intending to try again. Don't worry about rambling glengoyne, we really cannot hear enough stories like yours right now.

Thanks again, all, and good luck to all with little buns in your respective ovens.

jetpunk2000 · 11-09-2003, 09:15 AM

Sorry to hear about the bad news Samdari. Good to hear you haven't given up hope though.

jetpunk2000 · 11-09-2003, 09:37 AM

Sorry to hear about the bad news Samdari. Good to hear you haven't given up hope though.

Huckleberry · 11-09-2003, 09:38 AM

My wife and I have one daughter and another on the way due in February. Between the two successful pregnancies my wife had two miscarriages (both pregnancies failing at about the 4 to 5 week mark). Miscarriages are in fact a lot more common than most people think. Many women never realize they've gotten pregnant as they're not paying as much attention as your wife and mine did.

Hang in there. It will all work out.

WussGawd · 11-09-2003, 10:35 AM

TroyF · 11-09-2003, 11:32 AM

Prayers are with you my friend. Take care.

TroyF

Dutch · 11-09-2003, 11:51 AM

Oh man, terrible news...I'm very sorry.

CamEdwards · 11-09-2003, 04:24 PM

Samdari, I'm really sorry to hear about your loss.

11-08-2003, 02:18 PM	#2
vtbub College Starter Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Burlington, VT USA	Deepest condolences Ron __________________

11-08-2003, 02:32 PM	#4
Draft Dodger Coordinator Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Keene, NH	very sorry, although words can't really express it properly. __________________ Mile High Hockey

11-08-2003, 02:34 PM	#5
mtaystl03 High School Varsity Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: St. Louis, MO	Sorry to hear that. Good luck to you. __________________ Go STL Sports!

11-08-2003, 02:38 PM	#6
Noop Bonafide Seminole Fan Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Miami	__________________ Subby's favorite woman hater.

11-08-2003, 02:45 PM	#7
PilotMan Head Coach Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Seven miles up	Its very hard to express to others how it feels to go through what you are going through. I have been lucky to have 2 healthy happy boys, but we also have had to go through a miscarrige. It was early and we never got the closeness of hearing the heartbeat. My wife has had to endure the heartache of 2 others. One that was beaten out of her when she was a teenager. I really, really feel for you and my thoughts are with you. __________________ He's just like if Snow White was competitive, horny, and capable of beating the shit out of anyone that called her Pops. Like Steam? Join the FOFC Steam group here: http://steamcommunity.com/groups/FOFConSteam

11-08-2003, 02:32 PM	#3
wbonnell College Prospect Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Round Rock TX	Sorry to hear that. Personally, I've been through the same thing more than once. All I can say is don't give up hope; the next time is likely to be just fine.

11-08-2003, 02:51 PM	#8
Glengoyne Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: Fresno, CA	I am so very sorry Samdari. My wife and I went through almost the exact same thing about six months ago. The first visit, heartbeat, but also told that things were not so far along as thought. When my wife went back a few weeks later, she was told there was no heartbeat, and that the fetus was non-viable. It, as you said, took us like a ton of bricks. All the hopes we had invested were suddenly gone. Telling familly and friends was brutal, especially our 3 year old. She just couldn't figure out why we were crying. Our doctor told us then that this happens in something like 20% of all pregnancies. As we have shared with our friends, it seems much more common than I ever would have imagined. It almost assuredly means nothing regarding your future chances at conception. All of our friends who shared their experiences with this all have children now, and my wife and I are already expecting again. Our doctor said there was no need to wait, and said that with my wifes hormones at elevated levels, the fields were fertile so to speak. My wife went through a lot of emotions. From wanting to try again immediately, to wondering whether she wanted another child at all. There was also a share of guilt. "did I do something to cause this?", "Was it that glass of wine?". I just kept going back to "something wasn't right, that is all it was. Something completely beyond our control". When we went back in for the first ultrasound for this pregnancy at 8 weeks, it was a very tense time. For us, things are looking good this time around. I am sorry I rambled on. Really I was just wanting to say that I know a little of what you are going through, and that there is light at the end of the proverbial tunnel.

11-08-2003, 03:11 PM	#9
cody8200 High School Varsity Join Date: Nov 2000	I'm extremely sorry to hear that Samdari. It does put a silly thing like a game release in perspective on a matter of importance.

11-08-2003, 03:42 PM	#10
MizzouRah Hall Of Famer Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Troy, Mo	That's more than a bad weekend. I'm really sorry to hear news like this and hope your wife is ok as well as yourself. Todd

11-08-2003, 04:06 PM	#11
FrogMan Hattrick Moderator Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Pintendre, Qc, Canada	Sad, sad news indeed... I'll keep you in my thoughts, with all the best wishes for your future pregnancies... FM __________________ A Black Belt is a White Belt who refused to give up... follow my story: The real life story of a running frog...

11-08-2003, 04:26 PM	#12
Eaglesfan27 Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: New Jersey	I'm very sorry to hear your news. Unfortunately, many pregnancies (definitely over 20%) are believed to end in miscarriage. Often, the miscarriage occurs before the couple even know they are pregnant and it just appears as a particularly heavy period. Of course, it is much more tragic when the couple knows about it and is making preparations. My condolescences. __________________ Retired GM of the eNFL 2007 Super Bowl Champion Philadelphia Eagles (19-0 record.) GM of the WOOF 2006 Doggie Bowl Champion Atlantic City Gamblers. GM of the IHOF 2019 and 2022 IHOF Bowl Champion Asheville Axemen.

11-08-2003, 07:28 PM	#13
tucker342 Pro Starter Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Iowa City, IA

11-08-2003, 08:04 PM	#14
sabotai General Manager Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: The Satellite of Love	FWIW, my sister-in-law went through the same thing. She lost her baby. To go from the beginning straight to the end, my niece just turned 3 years old. Last edited by sabotai : 11-08-2003 at 08:04 PM.

11-08-2003, 08:57 PM	#15
Ben E Lou Morgado's Favorite Forum Fascist Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Greensboro, NC	Samdari: I wish I had words. "I am so sorry" sounds trite. I pray that somehow God would be able to comfort you and your wife. --Ben __________________ The media don't understand the kinds of problems and pressures 54 million come wit'!

11-08-2003, 09:06 PM	#16
Ksyrup This guy has posted so much, his fingers are about to fall off. Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: In Absentia	My deepest condolences. Considering my wife is 12 weeks pregnant right now, and we've gotten into the pre-planning phase pretty heavily, I can't imagine how you must feel right now, yet it hits quite close to home. Everything's OK here so far, but you never know. You and your family are in my prayers. __________________ M's pitcher Miguel Batista: "Now, I feel like I've had everything. I've talked pitching with Sandy Koufax, had Kenny G play for me. Maybe if I could have an interview with God, then I'd be served. I'd be complete."

11-09-2003, 08:56 AM	#17
Samdari Roster Filler Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Cicero	Thanks to everyone who responded, and those who sent a PM. There is little to console us right now, but having guys take the time to type any words of encouragement really does help. Some of you seem worried about not finding the right words. There are none, but you'd be surprised how far "sorry, dude" goes. Mrs. Sam has read this thread as well, and was overwhelmed, so I want to thank you all for giving her a brief smile (and making her cry again, but that cannot be helped). I had no idea how common this was, and we are intending to try again. Don't worry about rambling glengoyne, we really cannot hear enough stories like yours right now. Thanks again, all, and good luck to all with little buns in your respective ovens. __________________ http://www.nateandellie.net Now featuring twice the babies for the same low price!

11-09-2003, 09:15 AM	#18
jetpunk2000 Waterboy Forever Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Oceanside NY	Sorry to hear about the bad news Samdari. Good to hear you haven't given up hope though.

11-09-2003, 09:37 AM	#19
jetpunk2000 Waterboy Forever Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Oceanside NY	Sorry to hear about the bad news Samdari. Good to hear you haven't given up hope though.

11-09-2003, 09:38 AM	#20
Huckleberry College Starter Join Date: Dec 2001	My wife and I have one daughter and another on the way due in February. Between the two successful pregnancies my wife had two miscarriages (both pregnancies failing at about the 4 to 5 week mark). Miscarriages are in fact a lot more common than most people think. Many women never realize they've gotten pregnant as they're not paying as much attention as your wife and mine did. Hang in there. It will all work out. __________________ The one thing all your failed relationships have in common is you. The Barking Carnival (Longhorn-centered sports blog) College Football Adjusted Stats and Ratings

11-09-2003, 10:35 AM	#21
WussGawd College Benchwarmer Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Avondale, AZ, USA, Planet Earth, Milky Way Galaxy	__________________ "I guess I'll fade into Bolivian." -Mike Tyson, after being knocked out by Lennox Lewis. Proud Dumba Elect of the "Biggest Dumba of FOFC Award" Author of the 2004 Golden Scribe Gold Trophy for Best Basketball Dynasty, It Rhymes With Puke.

11-09-2003, 11:32 AM	#22
TroyF Coordinator Join Date: Oct 2000	Prayers are with you my friend. Take care. TroyF

11-09-2003, 11:51 AM	#23
Dutch "Dutch" Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Tampa, FL	Oh man, terrible news...I'm very sorry.

11-09-2003, 04:24 PM	#24
CamEdwards Stadium Announcer Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Burke, VA	Samdari, I'm really sorry to hear about your loss. __________________ I don't want the world. I just want your half.

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