Denis Leary Roast Is On Now

Ksyrup · 08-10-2003, 09:11 PM

on Comedy Central. I always forget to watch these year after year, and always kick myself in the nads when I realize I missed it.

I guess they're safe this year.

larrymcg421 · 08-10-2003, 11:45 PM

Nothing will top the Jerry Stiller roast. Kevin James got up and said Florence Henderson, who was in attendance, was the oldest person he'd like to fuck. "I'm not kidding. I will fuck her."

JHandley · 08-11-2003, 12:34 AM

That priest was hilarious.

"The bill collectior called and said they haven't recieved your final payment and I said, Oh yes, you have"

Good Times

SuburbanPimp · 08-11-2003, 12:59 AM

the hugh hefner roast. when gilbert godfried gets up and rips off ice-t's material...i will forever laugh so hard to the point where i get tears in my eyes.

it's a shame that comedy central is not hooking up with the NY friars club anymore (but after the lame chevy chase one last year, can you blame them?). it was cool to see jeffrey ross rip everyone a new one, and i would've loved to hear what he thought about hosting that lame mtv roast for trl boy.

good stuff this year, thankfully.

Ksyrup · 08-11-2003, 06:51 AM

No, no, no...the best line ever was a running joke through one of the original couple of roasts. I forget who was roasted, but someone early in the evening made a comment that "he wouldn't fuck Dr. Ruth's pussy with [some guy's] dick."

Later in the show, Sandra Bernhardt got up and sang Magic Man (to Jerry Stiller? Maybe it was the same roast...) to the guy being roasted, at which point Jeffrey Ross got up and said, almost verbatim, "Sandra Bernhardt, ladies and gentlemen...what the fuck was THAT? I wouldn't fuck Sandra Bernhardt's pussy with Bea Arthur's dick!"

And Bea Arthur was in attendence. Now THAT was comedy gold.

Ksyrup · 08-11-2003, 06:53 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by SuburbanPimp
it's a shame that comedy central is not hooking up with the NY friars club anymore (but after the lame chevy chase one last year, can you blame them?). it was cool to see jeffrey ross rip everyone a new one, and i would've loved to hear what he thought about hosting that lame mtv roast for trl boy.

good stuff this year, thankfully.

Is that why none of the geezers were there? I didn't even notice the NY Friar's Club was missing, except for the fact that the audience's age was decreased by about 25 years.

Funniest moment of last night was when Dr. Dre and Ed Lover welcomed Kiefer Sutherland, Liz Hurley, and the "ambiguously gay guy" she brought as her date. That was fucking hilarious. Poor guy.

NoMyths · 08-11-2003, 09:22 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Ksyrup
No, no, no...the best line ever was a running joke through one of the original couple of roasts. I forget who was roasted, but someone early in the evening made a comment that "he wouldn't fuck Dr. Ruth's pussy with [some guy's] dick."

Later in the show, Sandra Bernhardt got up and sang Magic Man (to Jerry Stiller? Maybe it was the same roast...) to the guy being roasted, at which point Jeffrey Ross got up and said, almost verbatim, "Sandra Bernhardt, ladies and gentlemen...what the fuck was THAT? I wouldn't fuck Sandra Bernhardt's pussy with Bea Arthur's dick!"

And Bea Arthur was in attendence. Now THAT was comedy gold.

The joke got some play on Leary's roast too...forget whose dick it was, but it wasn't as funny as the Bea Arthur crack.

Butter · 08-11-2003, 09:40 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Ksyrup
Later in the show, Sandra Bernhardt got up and sang Magic Man (to Jerry Stiller? Maybe it was the same roast...) to the guy being roasted, at which point Jeffrey Ross got up and said, almost verbatim, "Sandra Bernhardt, ladies and gentlemen...what the fuck was THAT? I wouldn't fuck Sandra Bernhardt's pussy with Bea Arthur's dick!"

And Bea Arthur was in attendence. Now THAT was comedy gold.

That may be the funniest thing I'd ever seen on TV. Especially when they cut to Bea Arthur sitting there.

Ksyrup · 08-11-2003, 09:43 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by NoMyths
Bea Arthur's crack

::shudder::

DeToxRox · 08-11-2003, 11:44 AM

lol

"Denis Leary looks like Sting with AIDS"

that was priceless.

Another good line from the preist..

"So a priest, a rapist and a peophile walk into a bar.. And that was just the first guy"

then after they cut to Liz Hurley and you can see her ask "Is that a real preist", Denis says yes I assume, because she goes "Wow"

Fritz · 08-11-2003, 12:29 PM

why couldn't they have just set Denis Leary on fire?

Butter · 08-11-2003, 01:20 PM

Unfortunately, I think he's flame-retardant.

Fidatelo · 08-11-2003, 01:23 PM

I wonder if he parks his flame-retardant car in flame-retardant spaces while other flame-retardant people make flame-retardant faces?

mrsimperless · 08-11-2003, 03:28 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Fidatelo
I wonder if he parks his flame-retardant car in flame-retardant spaces while other flame-retardant people make flame-retardant faces?

Pumpy Tudors · 08-12-2003, 09:41 AM

I watched the first half of the Denis Leary roast and was pretty disappointed. Hadn't realized that the New York Friar's Club was missing, but now that it's been mentioned, I'm convinced that Alan King, Jeffrey Ross, and the others are necessary to make any future Comedy Central roasts worth watching.

Ksyrup · 08-12-2003, 10:17 AM

It wasn't as good as some of the others, but I agree that Jeffrey Ross is essential to making the future roasts funny. Alan King...not so much.

ISiddiqui · 08-12-2003, 10:33 AM

I also thought Leary's speech at the end was a bit... well... not as happy as other people who had been roasted. Of course Leary always comes off as pissed, but he seemed REALLY pissed.

Ksyrup · 08-12-2003, 10:34 AM

I think that was just part of the act. At least, that's how I perceived it.

There are times when I wish I was able to say extraordinarily mean things to people, and have them refuse to believe any of them are true. How great would that be?

08-11-2003, 12:59 AM	#4
SuburbanPimp Mascot Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Maryland	the hugh hefner roast. when gilbert godfried gets up and rips off ice-t's material...i will forever laugh so hard to the point where i get tears in my eyes. it's a shame that comedy central is not hooking up with the NY friars club anymore (but after the lame chevy chase one last year, can you blame them?). it was cool to see jeffrey ross rip everyone a new one, and i would've loved to hear what he thought about hosting that lame mtv roast for trl boy. good stuff this year, thankfully. __________________ "From Rags to Riches": The 2004 Baltimore Orioles Southern Reservation Tour (Note: Not all tour dates were played in the south. Unfortunately, they had to go to Canada too.) Opening Acts: Ben McDonald's Gopher Ball Band, The Disabled List (feat. David Segui & Glenn Davis), The CAL-VINE! Tribute Band, plus a cast of dozens!! FINAL RECORD: 78-84. I think we're getting there. Now, it's time to get some pitching over the winter. FEAR MIGGY & THE ORIOLE IN 2005, BABY!!

08-11-2003, 06:51 AM	#5
Ksyrup This guy has posted so much, his fingers are about to fall off. Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: In Absentia	No, no, no...the best line ever was a running joke through one of the original couple of roasts. I forget who was roasted, but someone early in the evening made a comment that "he wouldn't fuck Dr. Ruth's pussy with [some guy's] dick." Later in the show, Sandra Bernhardt got up and sang Magic Man (to Jerry Stiller? Maybe it was the same roast...) to the guy being roasted, at which point Jeffrey Ross got up and said, almost verbatim, "Sandra Bernhardt, ladies and gentlemen...what the fuck was THAT? I wouldn't fuck Sandra Bernhardt's pussy with Bea Arthur's dick!" And Bea Arthur was in attendence. Now THAT was comedy gold. __________________ M's pitcher Miguel Batista: "Now, I feel like I've had everything. I've talked pitching with Sandy Koufax, had Kenny G play for me. Maybe if I could have an interview with God, then I'd be served. I'd be complete."

08-11-2003, 12:29 PM	#11
Fritz Lethargic Hooligan Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: hello kitty found my wallet at a big tent revival and returned it with all the cash missing	why couldn't they have just set Denis Leary on fire? __________________ donkey, donkey, walk a little faster

08-11-2003, 01:20 PM	#12
Butter Coordinator Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Dayton, OH	Unfortunately, I think he's flame-retardant. __________________ My listening habits Last edited by Butter : 08-11-2003 at 01:20 PM.

08-11-2003, 01:23 PM	#13
Fidatelo Pro Starter Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Winnipeg, MB	I wonder if he parks his flame-retardant car in flame-retardant spaces while other flame-retardant people make flame-retardant faces? __________________ "Breakfast? Breakfast schmekfast, look at the score for God's sake. It's only the second period and I'm winning 12-2. Breakfasts come and go, Rene, but Hartford, the Whale, they only beat Vancouver maybe once or twice in a lifetime."

08-10-2003, 11:45 PM	#2
larrymcg421 Head Coach Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Georgia	Nothing will top the Jerry Stiller roast. Kevin James got up and said Florence Henderson, who was in attendance, was the oldest person he'd like to fuck. "I'm not kidding. I will fuck her."

08-11-2003, 12:34 AM	#3
JHandley High School Varsity Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: Seattle	That priest was hilarious. "The bill collectior called and said they haven't recieved your final payment and I said, Oh yes, you have" Good Times

08-11-2003, 11:44 AM	#10
DeToxRox Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Michigan	lol "Denis Leary looks like Sting with AIDS" that was priceless. Another good line from the preist.. "So a priest, a rapist and a peophile walk into a bar.. And that was just the first guy" then after they cut to Liz Hurley and you can see her ask "Is that a real preist", Denis says yes I assume, because she goes "Wow"

08-12-2003, 09:41 AM	#15
Pumpy Tudors Bounty Hunter Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Pittsburgh, PA	I watched the first half of the Denis Leary roast and was pretty disappointed. Hadn't realized that the New York Friar's Club was missing, but now that it's been mentioned, I'm convinced that Alan King, Jeffrey Ross, and the others are necessary to make any future Comedy Central roasts worth watching. __________________ No, I am not Batman, and I will not repair your food processor.

08-12-2003, 10:17 AM	#16
Ksyrup This guy has posted so much, his fingers are about to fall off. Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: In Absentia	It wasn't as good as some of the others, but I agree that Jeffrey Ross is essential to making the future roasts funny. Alan King...not so much. __________________ M's pitcher Miguel Batista: "Now, I feel like I've had everything. I've talked pitching with Sandy Koufax, had Kenny G play for me. Maybe if I could have an interview with God, then I'd be served. I'd be complete."

08-12-2003, 10:33 AM	#17
ISiddiqui Hall Of Famer Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Decatur, GA	I also thought Leary's speech at the end was a bit... well... not as happy as other people who had been roasted. Of course Leary always comes off as pissed, but he seemed REALLY pissed. __________________ "A prayer for the wild at heart, kept in cages" -Tennessee Williams

08-12-2003, 10:34 AM	#18
Ksyrup This guy has posted so much, his fingers are about to fall off. Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: In Absentia	I think that was just part of the act. At least, that's how I perceived it. There are times when I wish I was able to say extraordinarily mean things to people, and have them refuse to believe any of them are true. How great would that be? __________________ M's pitcher Miguel Batista: "Now, I feel like I've had everything. I've talked pitching with Sandy Koufax, had Kenny G play for me. Maybe if I could have an interview with God, then I'd be served. I'd be complete."

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