Wrestling fans know what makes the perfect wrestler. It’s a guy who can execute a perfect fisherman’s suplex, sink a forty-foot putt, and even throw a pass to himself. Although maybe he wasn’t perfect. After all, I did hear an unsubstantiated rumor that he once defecated in a brown paper bag underneath the ring, mid-match. Nobody’s perfect, I guess.

A-he-hennnny way, with WWE SvR09 and TNA iMpact on the horizon, I figured it was time to lay out my blueprint for the perfect wrestling game. Actually, I can’t take all the credit, it was mostly the idea of OS’s own Chris Sanner. I think he got tired of me constantly griping about last year’s sub-par SvR08. So it’s time for me to put up or shut up. Here are my definitive ideas for the makeup of the perfect wrestling game.

Without being a developer, it is difficult to cite the specific technical details to improve the mechanics and nuances of the in-ring action. However, here are a few things that the perfect wrestling game must have:


Immaculate Collision Detection – Professional wrestling is a contact “sport.” Thus, the contact should be vivid, and practically flawless. I want to see the spit and sweat fly after every punch and forearm chop. I’m sick of lame, ill-timed (and ill-positioned) reactions to striking attacks. It’s sad to say, but some the old N64 titles sported better collision detection than many of the games we have seen since. (Although clipping issues were painful).

Realistic Combination Offense – As wrestling games become more impressive graphically, we start to notice other little pet peeves that drive us up the wall. One of these is the general nature of attacks. Traditionally, wrestling attacks (strikes and grapples) have been individual, disjointed affairs. They lack the sense of flow and fluidity that real pro-wrestling action possesses. This system does allow for a good degree of freedom to move in and out of the ring, but sometimes can feel stagnant.

The prefect wrestling game would incorporate combination attacks and transitions into different situations, (such as a simple front headlock transitioning into an Irish Whip, etc). From what I have seen and read thus far, the upcoming TNA iMpact is going to focus on combinations, and this is certainly a step toward perfection.

Finishing Move Finality - I’m sick to death of finishing moves not actually ending a match. There’s nothing more frustrating then pulling off your finisher, only to see your opponent kick out after a two-count. On the flip-side, landing a finisher forty-five seconds into a match seems premature, and really shouldn’t end a match.

What’s the solution? Naturally, I’ve got you covered. Traditionally, we have seen two different finisher “systems.” In the days Genesis and SNES, draining an opponent’s energy to a minimum would allow you to unleash a finisher. In more modern digital grappler, gaining momentum would allow your wrestler to let loose with some devastation. A perfect wrestling game would combine these two systems, allowing for a finisher when a wrestler gains a certain amount of momentum, and when his/her opponent is sufficiently worn down.

Add in a special little “out of nowhere” twist to allow wrestlers to occasionally unexpectedly lower the boom, and an in-depth finisher reversal system (perhaps a little button mashing mini-game that would occasionally pop-up), and you have a pretty dynamic and realistic finisher system.

And one final note, submission finishers, baring a rope break or reversal, should ALWAYS end a match. There’s nothing more stupid than locking in a Sharpshooter, only to simply release the hold after an allotted time period. Drinking Draino seems more intelligent.

Let Us Cheat – It’s time that a wrestling game gives us the ability to bend a break the rules in order to secure a victory. Whether it be using the ropes or an opponent’s tights to secure a pin, or sneaking in a brass-knuckle shot when the referee is not looking, it’s time wrestling games let us really indulge our dark side. This should not be without risk, however, as getting caught would result in a disqualification, or a stoppage of the referee’s count. Fighting fair just isn’t fun all the time. Tell me I’m wrong.

Deeper, Instinctive Specialty Matches - Don’t get me wrong, I love me some specialty matches, but only if they’re done right. And thus far, I haven’t seen many that are. Whether it be a WWE Elimination Chamber match or a TNA Ultimate X match, its inclusion in a game is effectively worthless if it’s not any fun to play.

A perfect wrestling game would focus on realistic physics for these matches, and allow for more freedom and flexibility there within. If I’m involved in a table match, I don’t want there to be only one specific button combination to end the match. It is boring and monotonous. I want there to be a multitude of ways to end the match. Same goes for ladder matches, First-Blood matches, etc. Just because they have a specific goal in order to win the match, there shouldn’t be only one way to achieve this goal. Variety is the spice of life.

Finally, the different ways to win these matches should be linked to basic match controls. It’s mighty annoying to have to refer to the instruction manual in the thick of a match, just to figure out how to win. More instinctive and fluid controls are a must in the perfect wrestling game.

Season/Career Mode

Just as a franchise mode is the cornerstone of a great football game, a season or career mode is the cornerstone of a great wrestling game. It’s a damn shame that we haven’t seen next-gen technology take the wrestling career mode to the next level. I have had a model in my head for the perfect wrestling career mode for quite some time, and it’s about time I got it off my chest.

The perfect career mode would be a combination of a normal wrestling game, an RPG, and a Choose-Your-Own-Adventure book. (Here’s a wikipedia link for those of you who are too young to remember the good old CYOA books). This pipedream of a mode would allow you to build your wrestler from scratch, and increase attributes and skills throughout by gaining experience points in matches and practice modes. It would start your wrestler (created or actual) from the very base level of the business, first working house shows, and eventually moving up to the big time.

The mode would begin by choosing to make your wrestler either a heel or face (bad guy and good guy respectively, for you non-wrestling guys). Typically, wrestling games have forcefully placed us into the face role, which has become rather vanilla. The ability to play the villain has always interested me, and frankly, it’s about time a wrestling game granted my wish.

Of course, your moral compass could change direction during the career mode, allowing you to shift from heel to face (or vice a versa). In fact, the aforementioned in-match cheating system could serve as a watershed event in this process.

The storylines within this career mode should be as flexible and nonlinear as possible. At every turn, your wrestler should be granted the opportunity to make a choice that impacts the potential outcome of, or setup for, upcoming matches. There should be a plethora of different storylines and angles, all of which are could vary according to the choices you make. Such a system would greatly impact replay value, as it would make it difficult to experience the exact same path greatness more than once.

Finally, the career mode for the perfect wrestling game would allow for multiple players, both on a single system, and online. I can’t imagine a more potentially entertaining gaming experience than creating a wrestler, then embarking on a WWE or TNA season against my buddies. This would be the greatest development in a wrestling game to date. I have difficultly putting the hypothetical awesomeness into words.

Create a Wrestler, or CAW, is the one thing that recent WWE games have done very well. Everything has become customizable, from body parts, to clothing, to entrances. Last year, we were finally able to import our own entrance music onto the Xbox 360. This year, we will be able to create our own finishers for the very first time. All in all, THQ’s Smackdown vs.Raw 09 is approaching perfection for the CAW system. But of course, I have a few more suggestions.

First and foremost, we need to be able to scan our own faces into the game. Even though I have enjoyed molding my CAW into my close digital likeness, using a face-scan technology would be a much easier, and much more accurate method of putting myself in the digital squared circle. Tiger Woods PGA Tour 08 gave us the first glimpse of this technology, and the perfect wrestling game would put it to good use.

Secondly, CAW entrances need to be easily customizable. I would propose of a video-editing room system of sorts. Within this system, you could preview an entrance through all possible camera angles simultaneously, with each camera angle viewed as a small tile on your screen. Changing camera angles in the actual entrance would be as simple as dragging and dropping in different camera angles, very similar to actual video and sound editing computer programs. It should also be a possibility to time entrances to coincide with specific points in the entrance music. Snoogins.

All in all…

Okay, I’m certain I didn’t think of everything, as smart and witty as I am. Chime in with your thoughts, and tell me how stupid I am. I eagerly await your insults…

Until next week….