The Concert and the Essay (A Relationship Story)

[ISiddiqui]

So, I figure I should get this out somewhere just for a broad analysis and to see what people think.

Anyways, as the thread title may have indicated, I have 2 tickets for a concert tonight. They were purchased late last year for an Arcade Fire show, for my girlfriend and I. I am a fan of the band and the girlfriend enjoyed what she heard so when I asked if she'd be game, she was all for it. I paid for both tickets, the show was my treat - it wasn't enough to break the bank account, but more than just a mere trifle. We have both been excited about it.

So, my girlfriend is applying for seminary and one of her options has their application due the same day as the concert, in order to be considered for full scholarship. So, ok fine, she'd been aware of the requirements for the application for a few weeks (if not more than a month). However, about 2 weeks ago she found out about this deadline date for scholarships. The application was done fairly quickly, but there was this 600 word autobiographical essay with it. And she kind of outlined for it this week and was going to sit down and write it last evening (it can be submitted online, so no need to wait for the mail).

In order for her to concentrate on the essay writing (we are living together) she asked if I'd go out last night, so I did (go out and drink, twist my arm why don't ya!!). I got back around 11:30 and was getting ready for bed and she indicated that she'd take a brief catnap with me and get up at 12:30 and finish up the essay so she could send the finished product to her sister before work for proofreading and then finally submit it to the seminary after she (my gf) got home from work. At the time she basically seemed to imply the essay work was going well, and that it was almost done and it just needed some fine tuning.

I got up at like 2:30 to go to the bathroom and my gf was in bed. She woke when I got back into bed and I asked her - how was the writing? She indicated that she hadn't gotten up at 12:30 and would just wake up a bit early to finish. For whatever reason I got this sinking feeling in my stomach and couldn't fall back asleep - I was gripped by this fear that she was waiting until the last second to bail on the concert. I couldn't fall asleep. So the next time she got up to use the bathroom, I expressed this concern and her response was "I hope I can get it done by the concert", which wasn't reassuring. I expressed the opinion that I felt it would have been mean to cancel on the concert at the last second. To which she indicated that she didn't intend to be mean - and because I was exhausted and half asleep I said something like you don't have to intend meanness to be mean - you could be negligent, which started an argument that I feel was resolved ok-ish.

Anyways... my feelings on this were that I can understand having to get an essay done. However, waiting until the last second to cancel is simply rude and mean (yes, I do realize I could have expressed myself better, but it was 2:30 and I was half sleepy). I feel that if I didn't bring it up then, it would have been told to me an hour before the concert - even though she indicated that she would have texted me as she left for work; and this morning she wrote a note that I almost missed about the fact that she doesn't think she can make the concert so I perhaps I can find someone else to go.

Here's the problem - its less than 24 hrs notice to do something on a Friday night. The vast majority of my friends have made plans already and I really, really, really do not want to go to a concert alone - as a lot of it involves waiting around for the band to start playing.

So thanks for reading this far and I'd be happy to hear any thoughts - was I too much of a dick? was she? etc. And I'm sure I've left out a few facts (I'm kinda tired from my lack of sleep - another reason why I don't think I'll be able to go to the concert if no one else can go with me).

[Izulde]

IMO, you came off a bit dickish here. Obviously she's having problems and is under major stress writing this essay, and the concert pressure just adds to it.

Sure, she shouldn't have procrastinated, and sure she could have canceled the concert earlier, but I believe she genuinely meant and thought she would be able to get the essay done on time and go to the concert with you, and she waited until the last minute because she did really want to go, but her apparent difficulties in writing the essay have prevented that.

[sterlingice]

Seems pretty straightforward to me. Probably wouldn't have messed with it at 2 in the morning but that's mainly because I don't expect to function much when sleepy. Maybe was a tad "dickish" with the response at 2:30 but you sound sorry, say as much, and then work out the actual problem (concert vs essay)

SI

[CU Tiger]

Pretty inconsiderate of her, IMHO.

I also wonder how committed she is to the endeavor (either for that matter). If I was committed to the outcome I wouldnt ahve waited until the last minute to write the essay. If I was committed I wouldnt have laid down for a "catnap" before it was finished, if I had been forced to wait until the last minute.

Not sure how competitive the 'ship is, but 600 words autobiographical really isn't much. I'm thinking 2-3 hours tops. There really isnt any subject in the world someone should be better qualified to talk about than themselves nd their life.

Maybe I sound harsh but reading your side, I wonder if she is really dedicated to the seminary path. Or I wonder if she really didnt want to go to the concert and was looking for an excuse. Finally a small part of me wonders if this is a passive aggressive control play to try and prevent you from going.

Am I reading way too much into it?
Perhaps.

But it sounds liek it was a big deal to you, and you made that perfectly clear to her. If she didnt respect that it would be a major issue for me.

[Izulde]

Originally Posted by CU Tiger

Not sure how competitive the 'ship is, but 600 words autobiographical really isn't much. I'm thinking 2-3 hours tops. There really isnt any subject in the world someone should be better qualified to talk about than themselves nd their life.
.

It's a full scholarship so almost everyone applying is going to compete for it. 600 words is roughly 2-4 pages double-spaced, IIRC. And while on paper (pardon the pun) an autobiographical essay might seem like the easiest subject to write about, it's actually in some ways the most difficult. You have to consider everything that's ever happened to you and pick how to shape and frame the narrative that not only answers the parameters of the essay writing prompt, but avoids being the cliche of what everyone else has said (see English graduate scholarship essays, so many of which essentially say "I love reading" or in a lot of programs geared towards social improvement, such as seminary, "I want to make a difference in the world")

[DaddyTorgo]

Originally Posted by CU Tiger

Pretty inconsiderate of her, IMHO.

I also wonder how committed she is to the endeavor (either for that matter). If I was committed to the outcome I wouldnt ahve waited until the last minute to write the essay. If I was committed I wouldnt have laid down for a "catnap" before it was finished, if I had been forced to wait until the last minute.

Not sure how competitive the 'ship is, but 600 words autobiographical really isn't much. I'm thinking 2-3 hours tops. There really isnt any subject in the world someone should be better qualified to talk about than themselves nd their life.

Maybe I sound harsh but reading your side, I wonder if she is really dedicated to the seminary path. Or I wonder if she really didnt want to go to the concert and was looking for an excuse. Finally a small part of me wonders if this is a passive aggressive control play to try and prevent you from going.

Am I reading way too much into it?
Perhaps.

But it sounds liek it was a big deal to you, and you made that perfectly clear to her. If she didnt respect that it would be a major issue for me.

600 words is what...a couple pages tops? On your life? That shouldn't be much to knock out. I also wonder about how dedicated she is to the seminary thing if she isn't passionate about it to the point where she can knock that off relatively easily.

Like CU Tiger said - big deal to you, you definitely made it clear to her, and she should know how much it cost etc., so she ought to respect that. If she doesn't, that's pretty dickish of her.

[Izulde]

You guys are treating this scholarship essay way too cavalierly IMO. It's a full ride, so it's a major deal, considering the average cost of a seminary degree is between $35,000 - $50,000. A half-assed slapdash job like y'all are suggesting is a surefire way to sink her.

[DaddyTorgo]

Originally Posted by Izulde

You guys are treating this scholarship essay way too cavalierly IMO. It's a full ride, so it's a major deal, considering the average cost of a seminary degree is between $35,000 - $50,000. A half-assed slapdash job like y'all are suggesting is a surefire way to sink her.

So she should have been working on it for a long time then, regardless of the due date.

Doesn't seem like something that should have been thrown together last minute - that's also my point. But if you are throwing it together last-minute it shouldn't take that long.

[Izulde]

Originally Posted by DaddyTorgo

So she should have been working on it for a long time then, regardless of the due date.

Doesn't seem like something that should have been thrown together last minute - that's also my point. But if you are throwing it together last-minute it shouldn't take that long.

Yeah, I already said she shouldn't have procrastinated. But shit happens, and some people just naturally procrastinate. Frankly, at this particular juncture, the essay is far more important than the concert, so if she needs to miss the concert, then so be it.

And like I said, I'm sure she thought she could get it done in time, but it turns out she couldn't. I'm damn sure she thought having Imran out of the house would give her the peace and quiet to focus and get it done, but she evidently had writer's block/paralysis, and didn't.

[stevew]

She's probably just not into Arcade Fire.

[ISiddiqui]

Interesting opinions - to clear up things, she has felt called to seminary for the last few years, but has always hit some sort of mental block. Our pastor has told her that is normal, but it seems like she gets all really excited about doing seminary work and then goes into a lull. I have wondered if she's suffering from a form of depression which causes the issue.

The issue for me was the last second "I don't think I go". The gf has a history of not knowing how long something was going to take, which causes change of plans, etc. But this was kind of a big deal to me... and now it doesn't seem like any of my friends are free and I'll have to pass on the opportunity (seriously, the few concerts I've been to have been exercises in waiting around where I have gotten slightly bored even with the person or group I have gone with - to go alone would be an exercise in extreme boredom until the hour to hour and a half of the set I want to hear starts up).

And she was really, really excited about the concert. So it isn't like she just wanted an excuse to get out of it.

Even an acknowledgement at 11:30 last night that she was having major trouble would have been nice.

[miked]

If I didn't have to attend GT graduation, I'd go

[digamma]

Originally Posted by ISiddiqui

For whatever reason I got this sinking feeling in my stomach and couldn't fall back asleep - I was gripped by this fear that she was waiting until the last second to bail on the concert. I couldn't fall asleep.

I'm not trying to be a dick here, but do you think you're being a tad too dramatic here? What are you going to do when things of consequence keep you up at night?

Anyhow, good luck to your girlfriend on her application, and enjoy the show. I'm sure it will work out.

[DanGarion]

Originally Posted by Izulde

You guys are treating this scholarship essay way too cavalierly IMO. It's a full ride, so it's a major deal, considering the average cost of a seminary degree is between $35,000 - $50,000. A half-assed slapdash job like y'all are suggesting is a surefire way to sink her.

Then she shouldn't have waited to the last minute...

If you don't want to do something half-assed you shouldn't procrastinate...

[ISiddiqui]

Originally Posted by digamma

I'm not trying to be a dick here, but do you think you're being a tad too dramatic here? What are you going to do when things of consequence keep you up at night?

I talk through things of consequence right then and there.

[Marc Vaughan]

I'd say you come off as a bit selfish - on one hand there is a one off concert which frankly doesn't appear to be a band you love and have followed your entire life, you aren't friends with members of the band etc.

On the other there is an essay which could affect your partners future quite significantly and you're prioritizing a one-off event which you'll probably have forgotten happened in a few weeks time.

I'd suggest you possibly help her by proof reading the article and if you make the concert then great - if not then shit happens, yes the concert tickets cost money - but frankly, so what ... money isn't everything.

[ISiddiqui]

Damn, if I was friends with members of Arcade Fire.... well, lets just say I'd likely be living a more exciting life .

I do own every album, however. I also consider "Suburbs" to be my favorite album ever...

[molson]

I think she's 100% in the wrong, procrastination is one thing if it impacts you alone, but when it impacts others that's not cool. But be an understanding partner and let it go. We all makes mistakes, I'm sure she feels bad about it. She owes you one though.

[ISiddiqui]

Originally Posted by molson

We all makes mistakes, I'm sure she feels bad about it. She owes you one though.

It's kind of where my thinking is at. But, and I hate to say it, I am going to feel a bit wary of making long term pricey plans like this in the future.

[DaddyTorgo]

Originally Posted by ISiddiqui

It's kind of where my thinking is at. But, and I hate to say it, I am going to feel a bit wary of making long term pricey plans like this in the future.

Totally understandable and justifiable.

[DaddyTorgo]

Originally Posted by molson

She owes you one though.

Or several.

Concert ticket price (X2)/going rate for...

[Logan]

Originally Posted by digamma

I'm not trying to be a dick here, but do you think you're being a tad too dramatic here? What are you going to do when things of consequence keep you up at night?

Anyhow, good luck to your girlfriend on her application, and enjoy the show. I'm sure it will work out.

When I read those same lines, I had the same reaction as you. It's a concert, not a good friend's wedding or something major like that. The procrastinating is bad and you should be annoyed by it but this reaction seems...odd.

[DaddyTorgo]

Eh - I think it really depends on how much the tickets were as a % of his disposable income as to how much he is overreacting/not overreacting.

I mean if the tickets were say...several hundred dollars each...damn right I'd be pissed. If the tickets were total < $100 I'd be irritated and upset, but not as pissed.

[molson]

If someone's girlfriend really loved the ballet or something, and there was this big ballet performance 6 months from now, and she bought tickets for her and boyfriend to go, and then, a few days before, the boyfriend says, "sorry babe, there's thing thing I have to do for work, I haven't got around to it until now, you understand, but hey, enjoy the ballet!"....there would be a major shitstorm, I would think. Are men expected to be less hurt and less emotional about stuff like this?

[Logan]

I think what would have kept me up at night, if anything, would be thinking "this girl who I'm serious enough to be living with might not be taking something so important regarding her future so seriously".

[ISiddiqui]

Originally Posted by molson

If someone's girlfriend really loved the ballet or something, and there was this big ballet performance 6 months from now, and she bought tickets for her and boyfriend to go, and then, a few days before, the boyfriend says, "sorry babe, there's thing thing I have to do for work, I haven't got around to it until now, you understand, but hey, enjoy the ballet!"....there would be a major shitstorm, I would think. Are men expected to be less hurt and less emotional about stuff like this?

Bingo. And in that case as well as this one, it can be more about what it says than simply about the facts of the matter - ie, how much does one person in the relationship care about what's important to the other person, what's going to happen in future situations where the stakes may be higher, etc. Sometimes actions speak to deeper things. Esp regarding something I'd be absolutely horrified to do to something else (the one and only time I backed out on a plan involving paid for tickets, I realized I had double booked that evening so I immediately called them when I found out - like 2 weeks before the event, and offered to pay my friend's tickets so that I'd be responsible for all the out of pocket costs and even then I felt like an absolute ass).

[Drake]

I'd submit your post to the Scholarship committee in place of her essay.

Honestly, if I'm giving a scholarship, I'd want that info before handing it out to someone who puts off a major deadline until the last second, then feels like they can/should compete with those who actually set aside time to prepare adequately.

But I might just feel that way because my wife is the exact same way as your girlfriend. (My wife calls it "working better under pressure of a deadline". I can tell the difference in the work she shits out at the last minute vs. the work she prepares for in advance, but she can't seem to see the difference.)

[Kodos]

Yes, Issiquidi has every right to be bothered by this. Doesn't speak well for her ability to prioritize.

[MrBug708]

It sucks, but it's a concert, not like the wedding of your brother or something.

And if you are looking for the cost of the ticket from a significant other, I doubt this relationship will go very far.

No offense to some of you (and I'm going to come off like an ass I feel), but your reasoning and thought process explains why some of you post a ton in single guy thread.

[Izulde]

Wow, the amount of sanctimonious huffing and puffing in this thread is beyond ridiculous.

[molson]

Originally Posted by MrBug708

No offense to some of you (and I'm going to come off like an ass I feel), but your reasoning and thought process explains why some of you post a ton in single guy thread.

Have you been in a lot of relationships where long-term plans with your significant other are not important, or aren't a priority?

I thought about this from the other side completely - where if you don't think it's a big deal to procrastinate to the point where you have to cancel plans with your girlfriend - a particular date that's important to her, mind you - you must not have a ton of experience maintaining a serious relationship. Is that the lesson here? If you don't want to be single, take your commitments with your girlfriend less seriously?

[MrBug708]

Originally Posted by molson

Have you been in a lot of relationships where long-term plans with your significant other are not important, or aren't a priority?

I thought about this from the other side completely - where if you don't think it's a big deal to procrastinate to the point where you have to cancel plans with your girlfriend - a particular date that's important to her, mind you - you must not have a ton of experience maintaining a serious relationship. Is that the lesson here? If you don't want to be single, take your commitments with your girlfriend less seriously?

I feel like you are trying to be obtuse here, but I'm not sure if it's intentional or not.

[Izulde]

I mean, on the one hand you've got people going all "Oh that's nothing - 600 word essay should totally be able to knock out in a couple of hours" and then people are all like "It's such a big deal that she didn't work on it sooner that this is something Imran needs to worry about for the future."

Grow.the.fuck.up. and get down off y'all's collective high horse.

1. As I already noted, procrastination happens, and the seriousness of the situation/deadline has little effect, particularly in those who are prone to it. You mean to tell me none of you have ever procrastinated on anything major in your lives? If you say no, I'm calling total bullshit on that.

2. All this stick-assed sneering does not a damned fucking thing to help the immediate situation. She can't go back in a fucking time machine and magically gain the time back. The fact of the matter is, she's facing a deadline, and in that deadline scenario, this sure as hell is a lot more important than some concert.

3. When you are faced with this sort of writing deadline situation, a lot of times you're staring at a blank page trying to force it out and nothing comes. You people are forgetting that it's not just a case of sit down and slam it out - there's a pre-writing thinking process that's involved. Sure the actual writing time may only be a couple of hours, but thinking about it and sorting it through in your head? That takes a lot longer.

4. So Imran may have to go to a concert by himself. So what? Honestly, if somebody can't go to a concert by themselves because they'll be bored waiting around for the set, then they're either not that big of a fan, emotionally high maintenance, or both. I've gone to tons of shit by myself and I've never been bored.

[molson]

Originally Posted by MrBug708

I feel like you are trying to be obtuse here, but I'm not sure if it's intentional or not.

I'm serious, I'm just flipping it around. Would you do that to your girlfriend (one that you were really into)? Put something off for a month and try to do it the day before a date that's really important to her?

And I think people who would prioritize their significant others' needs more responsibly would be MORE suited to a serious relationship, not less. So I don't understand your previous post at all.

Edit: As I said, shit happens, people make mistakes, and he should try to forgive her and move on. But she's still in the wrong here.

[Autumn]

I think it was definitely inconsiderate not to be clear much earlier that there was going to be a problem. If you think she really wanted to go, and wasn't just putting off telling you so it could be "Oh dang, turns out I can't go". If that's not the case, then yeah it seems rude to me not to be clear a day or two ahead of time "It's looking like I may not be able to go." To my mind whether or not she should have been able to go is a bigger issue, and more of her thing, so I wouldn't get into that at this point.

[molson]

I wonder when she was planning on telling ISiddiqui if he didn't bring it up. He was the one that had to bring this to the forefront. Which obviously wasn't fun for him.

[Izulde]

Originally Posted by Autumn

If that's not the case, then yeah it seems rude to me not to be clear a day or two ahead of time "It's looking like I may not be able to go."

And I'll reiterate I'm sure she thought she could have it done before the concert a day or two out, and if she was hit with an inspiration of how to write it in that timeframe, she'd have been absolutely correct and this thread wouldn't even exist.

She didn't get the inspiration, wasn't able to get it done, and so here we are.

[stevew]

I remember this time my friends and I camped out overnight at the mall for U2 tickets. My friend and I left one of our friends at the front of the line while we went to go hang outside. Anyways this moron decided to get out of line and we lost our spot. We were really pissed until we found a box of money. My one friend was like we should spend the money and buy as many tickets as possible and scalp them. Then we managed to get to the front of the line again, but these guys who looked like they were in the Mob started to chase us! I thought we were goners til it was revealed that we were on some hidden camera show and we won free U2 tickets!

[molson]

"I got up at like 2:30 to go to the bathroom and my gf was in bed. She woke when I got back into bed and I asked her - how was the writing? She indicated that she hadn't gotten up at 12:30 and would just wake up a bit early to finish."

Do you know if she did actually wake up a bit early to try to finish? If I blew it like this (and I have screwed stuff up before), then it's on me and I try to make it right. If a concert is a 4 or 5 hour commitment, I just have to find those 4 or 5 hours somewhere else. It seems like she wasn't wiling to do that.

[molson]

Originally Posted by stevew

I remember this time my friends and I camped out overnight at the mall for U2 tickets. My friend and I left one of our friends at the front of the line while we went to go hang outside. Anyways this moron decided to get out of line and we lost our spot. We were really pissed until we found a box of money. My one friend was like we should spend the money and buy as many tickets as possible and scalp them. Then we managed to get to the front of the line again, but these guys who looked like they were in the Mob started to chase us! I thought we were goners til it was revealed that we were on some hidden camera show and we won free U2 tickets!

I actually heard about that. Camping out in a tent in the sporting goods store was pretty ballsy.

[Suburban Rhythm]

Just my interpretation, which can be dangerous making based on one story:

Sounds selfish. I don't think it's a huge deal. And probably not the first time you've noticed it. Probably one of those things that you just accept as part of the total package. Irritating, but not necessarily a deal breaker.

[Danny]

Honestly, my view point would be completely different than yours iss. I'd have been trying to support my gf in finishing and not putting extra stress about the concert. Yeah she really should have been more prepared, but both my wife and I have put ourselves in that position before and the other person always steps up for the one in need. You should support the one you love when they are at their best and not at their best.

[DaddyTorgo]

Originally Posted by MrBug708

It sucks, but it's a concert, not like the wedding of your brother or something.

And if you are looking for the cost of the ticket from a significant other, I doubt this relationship will go very far.

No offense to some of you (and I'm going to come off like an ass I feel), but your reasoning and thought process explains why some of you post a ton in single guy thread.

FYI my post was a joke. I just didn't finish the joke with "/going rate of a BJ" out of respect.

And I don't think he ought to expect to be compensated for it, financially or otherwise.

[Drake]

And I don't think he ought to expect to be compensated for it, financially or otherwise.

Not even with butt sex?

[molson]

If this was an event she planned, an event she was excited about - I wonder if she would have managed to get the essay done earlier in the week. That's another thing that bugs me about this. In a serious relationship, at some point you have to prioritize your partners' values and needs as much as your own. I can't know if that's where things fell short here or not.

[Drake]

Kidding aside, I do want to add this:

If you've got a partner who is a procrastinator, you need to think about how much it weighs on you (outside of this incident) when thinking about the future. Like I said, my wife is a procrastinator. She was all through college, and she is in her professional life.

My wife is a nurse. She's always behind on her charting, which means that she frequently brings it home...which means that I end up carrying the burden of childcare, cooking dinner, etc., because she's "got" to work.

(I'm not a nurse. Maybe all nurse's bring charting home on at least a weekly basis. I dunno. I do know that she's getting threatened with getting written up or actually getting written up about every month, but maybe that's also status quo for the medical industry.)

The other element is that when my wife feels this deadline pressure, she's cranky. She gripes. It changes the mood of the whole house, because mom is sitting at her computer in the family room and complaining about the noise and distraction, or she's camped out at the kitchen table complaining about the noise and distraction. Everyone has to alter their behavior accordingly...because mom is feeling the pressure of the deadline that she claims to thrive on.

You see what I'm getting at here? If procrastination is something your girlfriend does frequently, there's a price to be paid for it as life gets more complex that goes beyond her personal discomfort or missed professional opportunities.

If you dig the rest of her package enough, maybe that's way down your list of relationship worries...but if you're not careful, it can ramp itself up into a full-fledged resentment factory eventually when you're giving up your leisure in the evenings to manage the household because she couldn't get her shit done in a timely manner.

It might be worth a discussion at the very least.

[Danny]

Originally Posted by molson

If this was an event she planned, an event she was excited about - I wonder if she would have managed to get the essay done earlier in the week. That's another thing that bugs me about this. In a serious relationship, at some point you have to prioritize your partners' values and needs as much as your own. I can't know if that's where things fell short here or not.

The essay is about 100 times more important in general than the concert. And from how it sounds its not like she stopped him or minded him going. If my wife had to finish something very very important and I had kings playoff tickets for the two of us, I could still go and enjoy myself.

I would probably skip it to help her though. Even if it was because she procrastinated.

[Danny]

My wife is a big procrastinator and has other faults. I love the whole of her and while it can be very frustrating sometimes, I support her in the good and bad and in improving.

God knows I also have my faults and she also is loving and supportive of me in good and bad.

[ISiddiqui]

So update. I was planning on staying around and helping or rather not going if someone didn't show up at the last second because if I don't know someone at an event, I can get some massive social anxiety (it isn't just "man up" people, really).

Anyway, she kept saying you should go! It's your favorite band and you should at least see them. Her sister was over and helping with the essay as soon as she got off work and I had already missed the opening act (no big deal), so around 8, I decided to go - though almost had a panic attack in the car on the way over (like I said MASSIVE social anxiety). But I got there and it was great!

However, about 9:15, I get a text saying the essay is being sent to a friend of mine for a review and she's going over a friend's birthday party!!! We had told this birthday friend that we may not be able to attend his party or attend it late due to the concert. In her view, she couldn't finish the essay if she went to the concert, but when she was done with the essay, there was no reason not to go to the birthday party. I am just a way different person, I think, because if I was ducking out of my SO's event because I was getting something done, I wouldn't go somewhere else if I finished a bit early (not even out to the bar)! I can understand what she is saying logically, but not emotionally at all!

Definitely was happy for her and was in a celebratory mood, but I am not good at hiding emotion and it was not long after she got home (I got home from the concert before she did from the party) she asked what was wrong...

Anyways, we talked, said we were sorry for hurting the other person even though we have absolutely no clue what in the world they are thinking and that's that.

I know there was no intentional malice, but definitely had a feeling of emotional manipulation or at least unease at that whole turn of events.

I think Drake has got some good questions about whether it is something I can live with in the procrastination aspects.

Suburban Rhythm is also right is this isn't the first time something like this has happened - this is merely the biggest one so far.

[nol]

*ctrl+f "pics plz"*

*0 results*

What's going on with FOFC?

But on a serious note, you can put me on team "it's just a concert." From my vantage point, the late notice was the exact opposite of malice. She was stressed about the essay and clearly struggling with it, but she was still thinking about attending the concert with you and was trying to keep that possibility alive for as long as she could.