Have you ever gotten busted a month later?

claphamsa · 07-30-2009, 01:46 PM

about 3-4 weeks ago I was on the metro with a fairly attractive you women, I was surreptitiously checking here out (dont we all). I remember thinking, thats an odd clothing choice (leaving capital hill at 5pm you assume its a gov worker), since she wasn't dressed up at all, but also wasnt wearing typical tourist fare. well she clearly caught me looking, but oh well, just some chick right? well.....

fast forward to this afternoon, my Assistant Secretary retired today, and we all went up to the going away. Normal work stuff... nothing special, right? well said young women is apparently in the same staff div as me, and... its someone I talk to fairly regualry, and the reason she was dressed oddly, shes military (most of the ones here change and leave their uniforms in their offices). She not only recognized me as the guy who had been checking her out, she knew who I was.

So here I am listening to a going away speach, and she sidles up next to me, whispers hi, and sugests that I keep my eyes in my head on the metro. ooppps. (nautrally I didnt think of anything witty to say, and looked even more the fool) oh well!

flere-imsaho · 07-30-2009, 01:48 PM

Unless you're married, this would be the point at which you should ask her out.

claphamsa · 07-30-2009, 01:51 PM

well it wasnt one of those "tee hee, hes checking me out" reactions, more along the lines of, "dont be a pig"

I will probably ask her out anyways!

ISiddiqui · 07-30-2009, 01:54 PM

Or turn it around and accuse her of ogling you on the metro!

molson · 07-30-2009, 01:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by flere-imsaho

Unless you're married, this would be the point at which you should ask her out.

+1

If she wasn't into you she absolutely wouldn't have said anything

That broad wants the clap....err...claphamsa

PackerFanatic · 07-30-2009, 01:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by flere-imsaho

Unless you're married, this would be the point at which you should ask her out.

Your first response was much better

claphamsa · 07-30-2009, 01:58 PM

what was it?

flere-imsaho · 07-30-2009, 02:00 PM

JUST ASK HER OUT YOU ****ING TOOL!!!!

claphamsa · 07-30-2009, 02:06 PM

flere-imsaho · 07-30-2009, 02:18 PM

To: Sexy train/staff chick
From: claphamsa

Subject: Need assistance with stationary/in-transit ocular activities

Dear Ms. #####,

I would like to thank you again for your constructive criticism regarding my observational abilities and assessment of the proper time at which to employ them. Since our previous discussion was cut short, however, I was wondering if you might have some free time to continue this conversation, as I am very interested in your advice.

Unfortunately my days, probably like yours, are quite full, but I could do a meeting after 5:00 if that is amenable to you. Offsite is fine.

Looking forward to your further insight.

Yours,
clampy, ESQ

Dr. Sak · 07-30-2009, 02:21 PM

Yeah ask her out. If she was really appalled she wouldn't have said anything to you.

molson · 07-30-2009, 02:26 PM

Clap hasn't actually told us if he's married yet....

claphamsa · 07-30-2009, 02:33 PM

im not, and she wont be in another month or so.....

Maple Leafs · 07-30-2009, 02:34 PM

"Keep your eyes in your head on the metro" is actually youth slang for "keep your penis in my vagina".

I think. Could be wrong on that one. I'm like 70% sure.

sterlingice · 07-30-2009, 02:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by flere-imsaho

To: Sexy train/staff chick
From: claphamsa

Subject: Need assistance with stationary/in-transit ocular activities

Dear Ms. #####,

I would like to thank you again for your constructive criticism regarding my observational abilities and assessment of the proper time at which to employ them. Since our previous discussion was cut short, however, I was wondering if you might have some free time to continue this conversation, as I am very interested in your advice.

Unfortunately my days, probably like yours, are quite full, but I could do a meeting after 5:00 if that is amenable to you. Offsite is fine.

Looking forward to your further insight.

Yours,
clampy, ESQ

Nicely done. The "clampy, ESQ" is gold

SI

molson · 07-30-2009, 02:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by claphamsa

im not, and she wont be in another month or so.....

Dynasty thread please.

claphamsa · 07-30-2009, 02:36 PM

haha, maybe.

sterlingice · 07-30-2009, 02:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by claphamsa

im not, and she wont be in another month or so.....

I hear that getting involved with separated women who aren't divorced yet is a good idea

SI

claphamsa · 07-30-2009, 02:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sterlingice

I hear that getting involved with separated women who aren't divorced yet is a good idea

SI

heh, my last serious GF was on a rebound from a divorce..... its a pretty ideal situation, they want a guy who will pay attention to them, but there is none of the sexual games... they know what they want and demand it

BrianD · 07-30-2009, 02:41 PM

Nobody has asked for pix yet?

JAG · 07-30-2009, 02:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by claphamsa

well said young women is apparently in the same staff div as me, and... its someone I talk to fairly regualry

I thought that line was kind of funny. I thought this was some random person you didn't know that you saw on the train, not someone you talk to on a regular basis. In that case I would've recommended talking to her while you were on the Metro so you could've had a good excuse to take the eyeballs out of your head.

claphamsa · 07-30-2009, 02:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JAG

I thought that line was kind of funny. I thought this was some random person you didn't know that you saw on the train, not someone you talk to on a regular basis. In that case I would've recommended talking to her while you were on the Metro so you could've had a good excuse to take the eyeballs out of your head.

I talk to her... didnt mean I knew what she looked like

Passacaglia · 07-30-2009, 02:48 PM

Tell her you were only staring because you're the seer; therefore, you should go to her place to avoid being night-killed.

RomaGoth · 07-30-2009, 03:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by claphamsa

about 3-4 weeks ago I was on the metro with a fairly attractive you women, I was surreptitiously checking here out (dont we all).

pics plz thanx

DaddyTorgo · 07-30-2009, 03:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Passacaglia

Tell her you were only staring because you're the seer; therefore, you should go to her place to avoid being night-killed.

WINNER...WINNER...CHICKEN DINNER!!!

cartman · 07-30-2009, 03:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RomaGoth

pics plz thanx

Here's a pic from the on-train tape of claph:

ISiddiqui · 07-30-2009, 03:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by flere-imsaho

To: Sexy train/staff chick
From: claphamsa

Subject: Need assistance with stationary/in-transit ocular activities

Dear Ms. #####,

I would like to thank you again for your constructive criticism regarding my observational abilities and assessment of the proper time at which to employ them. Since our previous discussion was cut short, however, I was wondering if you might have some free time to continue this conversation, as I am very interested in your advice.

Unfortunately my days, probably like yours, are quite full, but I could do a meeting after 5:00 if that is amenable to you. Offsite is fine.

Looking forward to your further insight.

Yours,
clampy, ESQ

You should also schedule this as a meeting on her Outlook. Ask Pumpy for more details.

Pumpy Tudors · 07-30-2009, 03:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ISiddiqui

You should also schedule this as a meeting on her Outlook. Ask Pumpy for more details.

Listen to this man.

ISiddiqui · 07-30-2009, 03:52 PM

I agree with Pumpy.

flere-imsaho · 07-30-2009, 03:58 PM

It can't possibly go wrong.

RomaGoth · 07-30-2009, 04:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ISiddiqui

You should also schedule this as a meeting on her Outlook. Ask Pumpy for more details.

You should upgrade to Net Meeting, it offers a more personalized approach to inter-office relations.

Pumpy Tudors · 07-30-2009, 04:17 PM

This does sound like quite the awkward situation, claphamsa. But at least you're not a married guy who got caught looking at least twice by the same woman. And she didn't suddenly start inviting you to join her for lunch every time she wore a low-cut top, even though she didn't offer when she wore a turtleneck. And she didn't start making up pet names for you like you were her new best friend in the world. And she didn't try to sit on your lap in front of a bunch of stunned co-workers.

God, wouldn't that be something? Can't imagine what that experience would be like.

So, uh, anyway, schedule a meeting in Outlook and ask her to go out on a date.

ISiddiqui · 07-30-2009, 04:19 PM

See, Pumpy always knows.

jeff061 · 07-30-2009, 04:44 PM

This thread. It's fantastic.

EagleFan · 07-30-2009, 04:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Passacaglia

Tell her you were only staring because you're the seer; therefore, you should go to her place to avoid being night-killed.

Since protection from a night kill would imply bodyguard that will either scare her off because she believes the bodyguard must also be back at clap's house and that this is some weird threesome proposition or she will think he was fake revealing about being the seer and be scared away....

Granted she may be into the first thought but I would advise clap to investigate to make sure she isn't thinking the devil's threeway....

Hmmm, maybe I need a break from WW....

RomaGoth · 07-30-2009, 04:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pumpy Tudors

This does sound like quite the awkward situation, claphamsa. But at least you're not a married guy who got caught looking at least twice by the same woman. And she didn't suddenly start inviting you to join her for lunch every time she wore a low-cut top, even though she didn't offer when she wore a turtleneck. And she didn't start making up pet names for you like you were her new best friend in the world. And she didn't try to sit on your lap in front of a bunch of stunned co-workers.

God, wouldn't that be something? Can't imagine what that experience would be like.

So, uh, anyway, schedule a meeting in Outlook and ask her to go out on a date.

Actually, it is quite enjoyable, especially if you are one of the stunned co-workers. You can stand up now, Pumpy.

k0ruptr · 07-30-2009, 04:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jeff061

This thread. It's fantastic.

+1

Chief Rum · 07-30-2009, 05:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EagleFan

Since protection from a night kill would imply bodyguard that will either scare her off because she believes the bodyguard must also be back at clap's house and that this is some weird threesome proposition or she will think he was fake revealing about being the seer and be scared away....

Granted she may be into the first thought but I would advise clap to investigate to make sure she isn't thinking the devil's threeway....

Hmmm, maybe I need a break from WW....

You guys are fooling yourselves.

Everyone knows clap will only get to the door of her house on Day One, say something weird, and then get himself lynched.

Danny · 07-30-2009, 05:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chief Rum

You guys are fooling yourselves.

Everyone knows clap will only get to the door of her house on Day One, say something weird, and then get himself lynched.

Winner

MizzouRah · 07-30-2009, 06:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Maple Leafs

"Keep your eyes in your head on the metro" is actually youth slang for "keep your penis in my vagina".

I think. Could be wrong on that one. I'm like 70% sure.

Oilers9911 · 07-30-2009, 07:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Maple Leafs

"Keep your eyes in your head on the metro" is actually youth slang for "keep your penis in my vagina".

I think. Could be wrong on that one. I'm like 70% sure.

Next time he sees her he should ask if that is in fact true. I mean, what could possibly go wrong?

NiteMaestro · 07-30-2009, 07:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by flere-imsaho

To: Sexy train/staff chick
From: claphamsa

Subject: Need assistance with stationary/in-transit ocular activities

Dear Ms. #####,

I would like to thank you again for your constructive criticism regarding my observational abilities and assessment of the proper time at which to employ them. Since our previous discussion was cut short, however, I was wondering if you might have some free time to continue this conversation, as I am very interested in your advice.

Unfortunately my days, probably like yours, are quite full, but I could do a meeting after 5:00 if that is amenable to you. Offsite is fine.

Looking forward to your further insight.

Yours,
clampy, ESQ

FTW!!

DaddyTorgo · 07-30-2009, 07:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chief Rum

You guys are fooling yourselves.

Everyone knows clap will only get to the door of her house on Day One, say something weird, and then get himself lynched.

OMFG!!!! LMAO!!!!

RendeR · 07-30-2009, 08:05 PM

I heart Chief Rum.

Izulde · 07-30-2009, 08:17 PM

This thread delivers. Multiple times over.

Lathum · 07-30-2009, 08:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chief Rum

You guys are fooling yourselves.

Everyone knows clap will only get to the door of her house on Day One, say something weird, and then get himself lynched.

this made me chortle.

Pyser · 07-30-2009, 08:29 PM

threads like these really are fofc's wheelhouse. me likey.

JAG · 07-30-2009, 08:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chief Rum

You guys are fooling yourselves.

Everyone knows clap will only get to the door of her house on Day One, say something weird, and then get himself lynched.

Girl: So clap, what do you do for a living?
Clap: Im some far programmer.
Girl: Uh...

DaddyTorgo · 07-30-2009, 08:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JAG

Girl: So clap, what do you do for a living?
Clap: Im some far programmer.
Girl: Uh...

YES YES YES

*dies laughing*

Passacaglia · 07-30-2009, 09:42 PM

OMG how could I have forgotten some far programmer? I was going to lobby to make that clap's title for a while!

07-30-2009, 01:48 PM	#2
flere-imsaho Coordinator Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Chicagoland	Unless you're married, this would be the point at which you should ask her out. Last edited by flere-imsaho : 07-30-2009 at 01:49 PM.

07-30-2009, 01:51 PM	#3
claphamsa Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: non white trash MD	well it wasnt one of those "tee hee, hes checking me out" reactions, more along the lines of, "dont be a pig" I will probably ask her out anyways! __________________ Dominating Warewolf for 0 games! GIT R DUN!!!

07-30-2009, 01:54 PM	#4
ISiddiqui Hall Of Famer Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Decatur, GA	Or turn it around and accuse her of ogling you on the metro! __________________ "A prayer for the wild at heart, kept in cages" -Tennessee Williams

07-30-2009, 01:58 PM	#7
claphamsa Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: non white trash MD	what was it? __________________ Dominating Warewolf for 0 games! GIT R DUN!!!

07-30-2009, 02:06 PM	#9
claphamsa Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: non white trash MD	ya, __________________ Dominating Warewolf for 0 games! GIT R DUN!!!

07-30-2009, 02:00 PM	#8
flere-imsaho Coordinator Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Chicagoland	JUST ASK HER OUT YOU ****ING TOOL!!!!

07-30-2009, 02:18 PM	#10
flere-imsaho Coordinator Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Chicagoland	To: Sexy train/staff chick From: claphamsa Subject: Need assistance with stationary/in-transit ocular activities Dear Ms. #####, I would like to thank you again for your constructive criticism regarding my observational abilities and assessment of the proper time at which to employ them. Since our previous discussion was cut short, however, I was wondering if you might have some free time to continue this conversation, as I am very interested in your advice. Unfortunately my days, probably like yours, are quite full, but I could do a meeting after 5:00 if that is amenable to you. Offsite is fine. Looking forward to your further insight. Yours, clampy, ESQ

07-30-2009, 02:21 PM	#11
Dr. Sak Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Stuck in Yinzerville, PA	Yeah ask her out. If she was really appalled she wouldn't have said anything to you.

07-30-2009, 02:26 PM	#12
molson General Manager Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: The Mountains	Clap hasn't actually told us if he's married yet....

07-30-2009, 02:33 PM	#13
claphamsa Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: non white trash MD	im not, and she wont be in another month or so..... __________________ Dominating Warewolf for 0 games! GIT R DUN!!!

07-30-2009, 02:34 PM	#14
Maple Leafs Coordinator Join Date: Jan 2002	"Keep your eyes in your head on the metro" is actually youth slang for "keep your penis in my vagina". I think. Could be wrong on that one. I'm like 70% sure. __________________ Down Goes Brown: Toronto Maple Leafs Humor and Analysis

07-30-2009, 02:36 PM	#17
claphamsa Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: non white trash MD	haha, maybe. __________________ Dominating Warewolf for 0 games! GIT R DUN!!!

07-30-2009, 02:41 PM	#20
BrianD Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Appleton, WI	Nobody has asked for pix yet?

07-30-2009, 02:48 PM	#23
Passacaglia Coordinator Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Big Ten Country	Tell her you were only staring because you're the seer; therefore, you should go to her place to avoid being night-killed.

07-30-2009, 03:52 PM	#29
ISiddiqui Hall Of Famer Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Decatur, GA	I agree with Pumpy. __________________ "A prayer for the wild at heart, kept in cages" -Tennessee Williams

07-30-2009, 03:58 PM	#30
flere-imsaho Coordinator Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Chicagoland	It can't possibly go wrong.

07-30-2009, 04:17 PM	#32
Pumpy Tudors Bounty Hunter Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Pittsburgh, PA	This does sound like quite the awkward situation, claphamsa. But at least you're not a married guy who got caught looking at least twice by the same woman. And she didn't suddenly start inviting you to join her for lunch every time she wore a low-cut top, even though she didn't offer when she wore a turtleneck. And she didn't start making up pet names for you like you were her new best friend in the world. And she didn't try to sit on your lap in front of a bunch of stunned co-workers. God, wouldn't that be something? Can't imagine what that experience would be like. So, uh, anyway, schedule a meeting in Outlook and ask her to go out on a date. __________________ No, I am not Batman, and I will not repair your food processor.

07-30-2009, 04:19 PM	#33
ISiddiqui Hall Of Famer Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Decatur, GA	See, Pumpy always knows. __________________ "A prayer for the wild at heart, kept in cages" -Tennessee Williams

07-30-2009, 04:44 PM	#34
jeff061 Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: MA	This thread. It's fantastic. __________________

07-30-2009, 08:05 PM	#44
RendeR Coordinator Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Buffalo, NY	I heart Chief Rum. __________________ http://wotlabs.net/s...8/signature.png http://wotlabs.net/sig_dark/na/banichi18/signature.png

07-30-2009, 08:17 PM	#45
Izulde Head Coach Join Date: Sep 2004	This thread delivers. Multiple times over. __________________ 2006 Golden Scribe Nominee 2006 Golden Scribe Winner Best Non-Sport Dynasty: May Our Reign Be Green and Golden (CK Dynasty) Rookie Writer of the Year Dynasty of the Year: May Our Reign Be Green and Golden (CK Dynasty)

07-30-2009, 08:29 PM	#47
Pyser Pro Rookie Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Los Angeles	threads like these really are fofc's wheelhouse. me likey.

07-30-2009, 09:42 PM	#50
Passacaglia Coordinator Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Big Ten Country	OMG how could I have forgotten some far programmer? I was going to lobby to make that clap's title for a while!

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