Calling All You British Blokes...Help Wanted

Chief Rum · 05-10-2003, 03:38 AM

Heh heh.

I know we have some British-born readers here (andy m, Casterling, the immeasurable Marc Vaughan, anyone else? Calis maybe?), and I may need your guys help.

You see, being born and bred American, I don't speak English the way some of you folks do. You guys have different names for stuff, and your own bit of slang. I'm able to catch up on some of it by reading the sigames community forums, but for the most part, I just don't have a knack for it.

Anyway, I'm about to start a CM4 dynasty, part of which will be coming from the viewpoint of a British football fan. I know the football terminologies for the most part, but I may need your help to pull it off authentic (or at least enough to fool the rest of these Americans here anyway).

So I encourage you to post here or in my dynasty thread in the Dynasty section to give me suggestions on how I can make it sound more authentic from a language use point of view. In particular, slang terms would be helpful (particularly the kinds of names fans would toss out about their most loved--and hated--players) or British nicknames or common terms involving football (not "pitch" or "fixture" which are things I know, but other, more obscure terms).

Just throwing out any number of other British turns of phrase or adages or what not will help, too. If I can use them, I'll throw them in.

Oh, if and in the early parts of my attempts to sound authentic turn out to be way overdone or ridiculous-sounding to your ears, please forgive me.

Thanks.

Chief Rum

andy m · 05-10-2003, 07:23 AM

make sure that you call hated players "wankers", and if a referee makes a poor decision you should describe it as "a load of old bollocks". when you beat a team you are not as good as, you will be "over the moon", and the opposite is "sick as a parrot".

you could do worse than study the work of ron atkinson: http://www.geocities.com/SouthBeach/Palms/6687/ron.html and http://www.dangerhere.com/ronglish.htm

CAsterling · 05-10-2003, 11:19 AM

A few that immediately spring to mind.

'Stands' at a football ground have seating
'Terraces' have no seats.

Common chant at a football ground to the ref is 'Whose the Bastard in the Black' whenever a decision goes against you.

Crap is a common word to describe bad players.
A good through ball from the midfielders/defenders for a forward to run onto (rather than passed to feet) is called playing it through the channels.

A few of the characters in the game.
Everybody hates Alex Furgerson (sp?) the Man Utd manager as he is a moaning git.
Graham Taylor - Aston Villa manager is known as 'the Turnip' - from his days as an ineffective England Manager.
Terry Venables - famous manager/coach is known as 'El Tel' as he once managed Barcelona.
Bryan Robson (manager) is known as 'Captain Marvel' from his days as a brilliant Man Utd player.

Arsenal used to get the constant chant of 'Boring Boring Arsenal' as they always seemed to win 1-0, now it is chanted by Arsenal fans in irony.

Homophobic behaviour is not unusual from English fans.
Most Man Utd fans, don't live in Manchester - most Manchester people support Man City.
Most Liverpool fans were born/live outside ot liverpool - most Liverpool people support Everton.

One of my all time favourite quotes is from a famous football manager (Bill Shankly), when discussing the importance of football 'Its not a matter of life and Death, its more important than that'

You might want to check out the sports pages of The Sun Newspaper as it can give you up to date info about the general impressions of modern players.

Hope some of the above helps.

CAsterling · 05-10-2003, 11:41 AM

Dola

If you are playing with a london club and want to include some Cockney Rhyming Slang try the below link for a good set of samples.

cockney slang

korme · 05-10-2003, 11:44 AM

I love cockney slang

haha, you need to understand it if you want to watch Lock, Stock

3ric · 05-10-2003, 12:30 PM

And then there's Colemanballs of course:
http://www.pcsunion.com/colemanballs.htm

SirFozzie · 05-10-2003, 12:43 PM

Here's a few good chants from the crowd (using a player from my beloved Cambridge Utd)

(sung to the tune of Jesus Christ Superstar)

Dave Kitson! Super Star!
How Many goals have you scored so far..

Or if you hate a certain player..

Nicky Anelka.. Super Star..
Runs like a girl and he wears a bra..

If a player has been suspected of breaking a diet, or if a ref (or a manager for that matter) is a fat b*stard, the traditional chant to greet them is "Who Ate all the pies?"

Fair weather fans are mocked with "You only sing when you're winning" and then when their team starts to lose, they start with "You're not singing Anymore"

The pushing and shoving that goes on with the action every so often is called "Argy Bargy".. and if two players face off, push at each other, but little else happens, it's referred to as "handbags at two paces"

RoastDuck · 05-10-2003, 01:30 PM

'Couldn't hit a cow's arse with a banjo' is a particular favourite expression of Dave Bassett's (ex-Wimbledon/Sheffield United manager) to describe a striker who... couldn't hit a cows arse with a banjo.

Another couple of Shankly quotes, who incidentally is soccer's version of Vince Lombardi:

"A footballer who does not give everything he has (in terms of effort) is a criminal, I would lock them in jail and throw away the key."

"If you are first you are first. If you are second you are nothing."

Some Brian Clough quotes:

"The ugliest player I ever signed was Kenny Burns."

"Trevor Brooking floats like a butterfly and also stings like one."

Also, remember that it is absolutely mandatory for English supporters to blame any defeat against foreign opposition on a 'cheating bastard referee' who was obviously bought (bribed) by those 'cheating bastard Italians/Germans/Argentines' (delete as appropriate).

Katon · 05-10-2003, 01:54 PM

That's complete rubbish. We blame ANY defeat on the ref.

Calis · 05-10-2003, 01:58 PM

Just to clarify, I'm not British. I'm Kansan, so that's close.

I have however been trying to get moved over to England for some time.

Ryan S · 05-10-2003, 02:31 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Chief Rum
anyone else?

Ahem

I know I am not very well known around these parts, but I am also British.

SirFozzie · 05-10-2003, 03:06 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Ryan S
Ahem

I know I am not very well known around these parts, but I am also British.

We won't hold that against you...

You Bloody Limey

Marmel · 05-10-2003, 03:09 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by CAsterling
Dola

If you are playing with a london club and want to include some Cockney Rhyming Slang try the below link for a good set of samples.

cockney slang

The guy from Ocean's 11 speaks this way. I love it!

Chief Rum · 05-10-2003, 03:20 PM

Damn guys. This stuff is just wonderful! Exactly what I was looking for.

Heh heh, after I posted that, I later thought of you, Ryan S. I should have thought of you among the first.

If you have any more guys, keep them coming. I'll start my dynasty sometime today, though, and you can feel free to offer commentary here or there (especially after I gave a first try at writing "English").

If it matters any, the area in question is Kettering Town, northeast of Northampton. I'm planning on making all of the fans Kettering Town Poppies fans (of course)-- that is the dynasty I'm starting off with. They will also mostly be favoring of local teams, so they will like the Diamonds of Rushden and the Northampton Cobblers. They generally support Birmingham in the EPL, and they constantly get into fights about Coventry and Leicester, between the two of which the fans are evenly split.

Thanks in advance for all your help. Hopefully I'll pull it off well enough that you guys will want to read it.

Chief Rum

P.S. Heh, Calis, there's no place like home, eh? Yeah, Kansas is a bit far from the UK--I took a wild stab cause you follow the footy.

SirFozzie · 05-10-2003, 03:26 PM

Look up a Kettering Town fansite, try to get some of their stuff from the messageboard.. have them see who they hate.. (a lot of folks even in that area hate Rushden and Diamonds, seeing them as a team that just buys their way up the ranks.

andy m · 05-10-2003, 03:31 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Marmel
The guy from Ocean's 11 speaks this way. I love it!

that guy did the worst cockney accent since dick van dyke in mary poppins.

SirFozzie · 05-10-2003, 04:02 PM

Oh.. and there is a sense of nationalism in there, the Welsh teams are "nothing more then a bunch of bloody sheep-shaggers", Scotland a reputation for being a bunch of dour drinkers.. etc etc..

korme · 05-10-2003, 04:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Marmel
The guy from Ocean's 11 speaks this way. I love it!

We're in a Barney.. (confused silence)... Rubble, Trouble.

Chief Rum · 05-10-2003, 04:12 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by SirFozzie
Look up a Kettering Town fansite, try to get some of their stuff from the messageboard.. have them see who they hate.. (a lot of folks even in that area hate Rushden and Diamonds, seeing them as a team that just buys their way up the ranks.

Yeah, I found the Kettering Town web site last night, although I haven't found any fan sites yet. Most of the official site is pretty good actually, so it's disappointing that the one or two links that currently don't go anywhere are to the Social Club and the Contact Us list (where I might be able to find actual fans).

I looked up some football MBs, but I didn't find any that focused far enough down for me to find more on Kettering. If any of you have any recommendations on that, I would be happy to check them out.

And, see, that's great stuff about R&D. I never would have known that without you telling me.

It even makes sense, since Rushden is very recently from the Conference, so they were probably rivals.

Actually, if Kettering has a real rival and one of you knows who, let me know that, too.

Chief Rum

SirFozzie · 05-10-2003, 04:13 PM

try rivals.net as well..

SirFozzie · 05-10-2003, 04:15 PM

here's a link to help you Chief: http://www.ketteringtownfc.com/

McSweeny · 05-10-2003, 04:22 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by SirFozzie
Oh.. and there is a sense of nationalism in there, the Welsh teams are "nothing more then a bunch of bloody sheep-shaggers", Scotland a reputation for being a bunch of dour drinkers.. etc etc..

i believe those bastard derby supporters take the cake when it came to sheep shagging

Super Ugly · 05-10-2003, 05:02 PM

Kettering's only 20 minutes from my house. Have you ever see "Texas Chainsaw Massacre"? Imagine that, webbed feet and the terrible stench of cider. I don't know about cockney rhyming slang, but if you can get hold of any drunken yokel farmer patois then it'd sound eerily accurate ...

SirFozzie · 05-10-2003, 05:03 PM

Hey Super Ugly! Nice to see someone from Cam-ber-idge, how close are you to the Abbey Stadium?

tucker342 · 05-10-2003, 05:13 PM

beaver leaver --------------- Noun. A homosexual male. Due to not being interested in 'beaver'. See 'beaver' (noun).

Blimey! ---------------------- Exclam. An exclamation of surprise. An abbreviated form of blind me. Cf. 'cor blimey'.

These are a couple that I found. Try this website.
http://www.peevish.co.uk/slang/b.htm

andy m · 05-10-2003, 05:52 PM

Quote:

how close are you to the Abbey Stadium?

the shabby stadium morelike. it's a dive.

Chief Rum · 05-10-2003, 05:54 PM

I started the dynasty! Feel free to check it out. Thanks for all your help.

Chief Rum

ColtCrazy · 05-11-2003, 10:44 AM

Crystal Palace fans, during one of their rare wins, starting chanting "You're Shit...and you know you are" to the other team.

not English, but my father is, so I've picked up a lot of it. I wouldn't mind living there for awhile and teaching either.

05-10-2003, 07:23 AM	#2
andy m High School Varsity Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: norwich, UK	make sure that you call hated players "wankers", and if a referee makes a poor decision you should describe it as "a load of old bollocks". when you beat a team you are not as good as, you will be "over the moon", and the opposite is "sick as a parrot". you could do worse than study the work of ron atkinson: http://www.geocities.com/SouthBeach/Palms/6687/ron.html and http://www.dangerhere.com/ronglish.htm __________________ mostly harmless FOFL 2009 champs - Norwich Quagmire

05-10-2003, 11:19 AM	#3
CAsterling High School JV Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Herndon, Va	A few that immediately spring to mind. 'Stands' at a football ground have seating 'Terraces' have no seats. Common chant at a football ground to the ref is 'Whose the Bastard in the Black' whenever a decision goes against you. Crap is a common word to describe bad players. A good through ball from the midfielders/defenders for a forward to run onto (rather than passed to feet) is called playing it through the channels. A few of the characters in the game. Everybody hates Alex Furgerson (sp?) the Man Utd manager as he is a moaning git. Graham Taylor - Aston Villa manager is known as 'the Turnip' - from his days as an ineffective England Manager. Terry Venables - famous manager/coach is known as 'El Tel' as he once managed Barcelona. Bryan Robson (manager) is known as 'Captain Marvel' from his days as a brilliant Man Utd player. Arsenal used to get the constant chant of 'Boring Boring Arsenal' as they always seemed to win 1-0, now it is chanted by Arsenal fans in irony. Homophobic behaviour is not unusual from English fans. Most Man Utd fans, don't live in Manchester - most Manchester people support Man City. Most Liverpool fans were born/live outside ot liverpool - most Liverpool people support Everton. One of my all time favourite quotes is from a famous football manager (Bill Shankly), when discussing the importance of football 'Its not a matter of life and Death, its more important than that' You might want to check out the sports pages of The Sun Newspaper as it can give you up to date info about the general impressions of modern players. Hope some of the above helps. __________________ The funniest comedy duo I have ever seen - www.magaga.com/

05-10-2003, 11:41 AM	#4
CAsterling High School JV Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Herndon, Va	Dola If you are playing with a london club and want to include some Cockney Rhyming Slang try the below link for a good set of samples. cockney slang __________________ The funniest comedy duo I have ever seen - www.magaga.com/

05-10-2003, 12:30 PM	#6
3ric College Starter Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: Sweden	And then there's Colemanballs of course: http://www.pcsunion.com/colemanballs.htm __________________ San Diego Chargers (HFL) - Lappland Reindeers (WOOF) - Gothenburg Giants (IHOF) Indiana: A TCY VC - year 2044 - the longest running dynasty ever on FOFC!

05-10-2003, 12:43 PM	#7
SirFozzie Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: The State of Insanity	Here's a few good chants from the crowd (using a player from my beloved Cambridge Utd) (sung to the tune of Jesus Christ Superstar) Dave Kitson! Super Star! How Many goals have you scored so far.. Or if you hate a certain player.. Nicky Anelka.. Super Star.. Runs like a girl and he wears a bra.. If a player has been suspected of breaking a diet, or if a ref (or a manager for that matter) is a fat b*stard, the traditional chant to greet them is "Who Ate all the pies?" Fair weather fans are mocked with "You only sing when you're winning" and then when their team starts to lose, they start with "You're not singing Anymore" The pushing and shoving that goes on with the action every so often is called "Argy Bargy".. and if two players face off, push at each other, but little else happens, it's referred to as "handbags at two paces" __________________ Check out Foz's New Video Game Site, An 8-bit Mind in an 8GB world! http://an8bitmind.com

05-10-2003, 11:44 AM	#5
korme Go Reds Join Date: May 2001 Location: Bloodbuzz Ohio	I love cockney slang haha, you need to understand it if you want to watch Lock, Stock

05-10-2003, 01:30 PM	#8
RoastDuck Mascot Join Date: Oct 2000	'Couldn't hit a cow's arse with a banjo' is a particular favourite expression of Dave Bassett's (ex-Wimbledon/Sheffield United manager) to describe a striker who... couldn't hit a cows arse with a banjo. Another couple of Shankly quotes, who incidentally is soccer's version of Vince Lombardi: "A footballer who does not give everything he has (in terms of effort) is a criminal, I would lock them in jail and throw away the key." "If you are first you are first. If you are second you are nothing." Some Brian Clough quotes: "The ugliest player I ever signed was Kenny Burns." "Trevor Brooking floats like a butterfly and also stings like one." Also, remember that it is absolutely mandatory for English supporters to blame any defeat against foreign opposition on a 'cheating bastard referee' who was obviously bought (bribed) by those 'cheating bastard Italians/Germans/Argentines' (delete as appropriate).

05-10-2003, 01:54 PM	#9
Katon College Benchwarmer Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Providence, RI	That's complete rubbish. We blame ANY defeat on the ref.

05-10-2003, 01:58 PM	#10
Calis College Starter Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Kansas	Just to clarify, I'm not British. I'm Kansan, so that's close. I have however been trying to get moved over to England for some time.

05-10-2003, 03:20 PM	#14
Chief Rum Hall Of Famer Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Where Hip Hop lives	Damn guys. This stuff is just wonderful! Exactly what I was looking for. Heh heh, after I posted that, I later thought of you, Ryan S. I should have thought of you among the first. If you have any more guys, keep them coming. I'll start my dynasty sometime today, though, and you can feel free to offer commentary here or there (especially after I gave a first try at writing "English"). If it matters any, the area in question is Kettering Town, northeast of Northampton. I'm planning on making all of the fans Kettering Town Poppies fans (of course)-- that is the dynasty I'm starting off with. They will also mostly be favoring of local teams, so they will like the Diamonds of Rushden and the Northampton Cobblers. They generally support Birmingham in the EPL, and they constantly get into fights about Coventry and Leicester, between the two of which the fans are evenly split. Thanks in advance for all your help. Hopefully I'll pull it off well enough that you guys will want to read it. Chief Rum P.S. Heh, Calis, there's no place like home, eh? Yeah, Kansas is a bit far from the UK--I took a wild stab cause you follow the footy. __________________ . . I would rather be wrong...Than live in the shadows of your song...My mind is open wide...And now I'm ready to start...You're not sure...You open the door...And step out into the dark...Now I'm ready.

05-10-2003, 03:26 PM	#15
SirFozzie Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: The State of Insanity	Look up a Kettering Town fansite, try to get some of their stuff from the messageboard.. have them see who they hate.. (a lot of folks even in that area hate Rushden and Diamonds, seeing them as a team that just buys their way up the ranks. __________________ Check out Foz's New Video Game Site, An 8-bit Mind in an 8GB world! http://an8bitmind.com

05-10-2003, 04:02 PM	#17
SirFozzie Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: The State of Insanity	Oh.. and there is a sense of nationalism in there, the Welsh teams are "nothing more then a bunch of bloody sheep-shaggers", Scotland a reputation for being a bunch of dour drinkers.. etc etc.. __________________ Check out Foz's New Video Game Site, An 8-bit Mind in an 8GB world! http://an8bitmind.com

05-10-2003, 04:13 PM	#20
SirFozzie Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: The State of Insanity	try rivals.net as well.. __________________ Check out Foz's New Video Game Site, An 8-bit Mind in an 8GB world! http://an8bitmind.com

05-10-2003, 04:15 PM	#21
SirFozzie Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: The State of Insanity	here's a link to help you Chief: http://www.ketteringtownfc.com/ __________________ Check out Foz's New Video Game Site, An 8-bit Mind in an 8GB world! http://an8bitmind.com

05-10-2003, 05:02 PM	#23
Super Ugly High School JV Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Look behind you	Kettering's only 20 minutes from my house. Have you ever see "Texas Chainsaw Massacre"? Imagine that, webbed feet and the terrible stench of cider. I don't know about cockney rhyming slang, but if you can get hold of any drunken yokel farmer patois then it'd sound eerily accurate ...

05-10-2003, 05:03 PM	#24
SirFozzie Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: The State of Insanity	Hey Super Ugly! Nice to see someone from Cam-ber-idge, how close are you to the Abbey Stadium? __________________ Check out Foz's New Video Game Site, An 8-bit Mind in an 8GB world! http://an8bitmind.com

05-10-2003, 05:13 PM	#25
tucker342 Pro Starter Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Iowa City, IA	beaver leaver --------------- Noun. A homosexual male. Due to not being interested in 'beaver'. See 'beaver' (noun). Blimey! ---------------------- Exclam. An exclamation of surprise. An abbreviated form of blind me. Cf. 'cor blimey'. These are a couple that I found. Try this website. http://www.peevish.co.uk/slang/b.htm

05-10-2003, 05:54 PM	#27
Chief Rum Hall Of Famer Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Where Hip Hop lives	I started the dynasty! Feel free to check it out. Thanks for all your help. Chief Rum __________________ . . I would rather be wrong...Than live in the shadows of your song...My mind is open wide...And now I'm ready to start...You're not sure...You open the door...And step out into the dark...Now I'm ready.

05-11-2003, 10:44 AM	#28
ColtCrazy College Starter Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Midwest	Crystal Palace fans, during one of their rare wins, starting chanting "You're Shit...and you know you are" to the other team. not English, but my father is, so I've picked up a lot of it. I wouldn't mind living there for awhile and teaching either. __________________ The Field Generals and Statis Pro Basketball Super League

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