non-racially insensitive things you'd love to say over a Wal Mart Intercom

stevew · 03-20-2010, 07:36 PM

Anyone?

I will start:
"Anyone planning to buy a product made by children in a sweat shop, please leave the store"

Abe Sargent · 03-20-2010, 07:42 PM

Anyone who actually believes in the materialist crap that Saving Money actually does make your Life Better like Wal-Unethicals says, out of the store.

sterlingice · 03-20-2010, 07:43 PM

So, wait? Are these supposed to be insensitive things that are non-racial? Or anything that isn't racially insensitive?

(EDIT: I'm mkaing this too complicated, aren't I?)

SI

stevew · 03-20-2010, 07:50 PM

"Anyone wearing pants with an elastic waistband, please leave the store"

BYU 14 · 03-20-2010, 08:21 PM

"Anyone with more Fingers than teeth, please leave the store."

Pumpy Tudors · 03-20-2010, 08:23 PM

"Bring your friends"

EagleFan · 03-20-2010, 08:29 PM

Careful, you'll get arrested. What happens if people that are any of those things get violent because of what you said...

JPhillips · 03-20-2010, 08:29 PM

Respect Arnold Palmer or leave the store.

BYU 14 · 03-20-2010, 08:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JPhillips

Respect Arnold Palmer or leave the store.

Happy Gilmore says Arnold Palmer is his Bitch.

NorvTurnerOverdrive · 03-20-2010, 08:54 PM

da roof,
da roof,
da roof is on fi-yah...

no, seriously. there's a fire on the roof. everyone needs to leave.

Sun Tzu · 03-20-2010, 09:24 PM

"Sometimes, at night, the Ice Weasels come..."

SteveMax58 · 03-20-2010, 09:38 PM

"Attention Raymond...please come to the men's room, stall #2...and bring the rubber gloves and a hammer. Thank you!"

Senator · 03-20-2010, 09:44 PM

Now I clown around, when I hang around with the Underground...

molson · 03-20-2010, 09:59 PM

"All Mexicans, please leave the store".

DAMN IT - I'll try again in a few minutes.

Julio Riddols · 03-21-2010, 06:27 AM

"Attention Customers : Its the weekly Wal-Mart free for all minute! Any Item that leaves the store within the next minute is free of charge, our way of thanking you for making Wal Mart your choice for your everyday needs!"

And I would try to sound as much like a recording as possible.

Karlifornia · 03-21-2010, 06:31 AM

"All conservatives...please continue opposing our part-time employees the right to affordable health care"

Apathetic Lurker · 03-21-2010, 06:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stevew

"Anyone wearing pants with an elastic waistband, please leave the store"

What are you trying to do? Empty the store?

Apathetic Lurker · 03-21-2010, 06:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Karlifornia

"All conservatives...please continue opposing our part-time employees the right to affordable health care"

" Because what we have kills our corporate profit margins "

Dutch · 03-21-2010, 06:52 AM

"WAL-MART: The High Cost of Low Price Blu-Ray is 50% off through Labor Day."

albionmoonlight · 03-21-2010, 08:01 AM

Attention to the owner of a [red/blue/white/any common color] mid-sized car with a [whatever state you are in] license plate. Your car has just been hit in the parking lot. Please report to the manager at the front of the store.

Marc Vaughan · 03-21-2010, 08:05 AM

Could all mobiliyu scooter riders who aren't disabled please get up and walk for a change.

Easy Mac · 03-21-2010, 08:54 AM

I would read tiger woods' texts... Or paradise lost

Warhammer · 03-21-2010, 10:05 AM

"Go to Target"

digamma · 03-21-2010, 10:33 AM

In Lawrence, KS, "Would Ali Farokhmanesh and Kwadzo Ahelegbe leave the store please? Like yesterday."

stevew · 03-21-2010, 10:43 AM

Attention scooter riders. How much would you pay for a wookie.

Greyroofoo · 03-21-2010, 11:01 AM

"Show us your hooters!"

BYU 14 · 03-21-2010, 11:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Greyroofoo

"Show us your hooters!"

It's all fun and games until some one does, Strippers do not shop at Wal-Mart my friend.

Abe Sargent · 03-21-2010, 11:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BYU 14

It's all fun and games until some one does, Strippers do not shop at Wal-Mart my friend.

That's a completely different store in the Walton franchise.

ColtCrazy · 03-21-2010, 11:22 AM

If you say the Hooters thing at Wal-Mart, you are sure to see multiple pairs. Usually on the same person.

sterlingice · 03-21-2010, 11:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Julio Riddols

"Attention Customers : Its the weekly Wal-Mart free for all minute! Any Item that leaves the store within the next minute is free of charge, our way of thanking you for making Wal Mart your choice for your everyday needs!"

And I would try to sound as much like a recording as possible.

SI

Sun Tzu · 03-21-2010, 11:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Easy Mac

I would read tiger woods' texts... Or paradise lost

win

Bad-example · 03-21-2010, 01:01 PM

Attention Wal-Mart customers, all Canadians must leave the store.

Flasch186 · 03-21-2010, 01:33 PM

"Welcome to Wal Mart"

~Im supposedly self employed right now but I feel unemployed

Solecismic · 03-21-2010, 01:39 PM

"Attention Wal-Mart Shoppers: You can find affordable health care in aisle 7, next to the potato chips and cheese doodles."

Bea-Arthurs Hip · 03-22-2010, 09:29 PM

All Aspartame products are now 1/2 off. Stock up America , it is good for you and tastes great! And dont forget to feed this to your children! They can wash it down with a nice glass of Flouride thats great for their teeth!

Little long but it works.

Pumpy Tudors · 03-22-2010, 10:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bea-Arthurs Hip

All Aspartame products are now 1/2 off. Stock up America , it is good for you and tastes great! And dont forget to feed this to your children! They can wash it down with a nice glass of Flouride thats great for their teeth!

Little long but it works.

Your first post here in 4 months, and you decide to use it in this thread?

Celeval · 03-23-2010, 10:48 AM

Attention Wal-Mart customers: We have a special guest in the store today with us! Our regional manager is disguised as a regular employee - whoever can guess which one, and bring him or her to the customer service desk first will win a $100 gift certificate! Go!

EagleFan · 03-23-2010, 11:25 AM

Attention Wal-Mart shoppers! Get the fuck out!!!

or

Attention Wal-Mart shoppers! In honor of the most recent movement of our country towards socialism we would like to introduce our Bread Line Special. The first 100 customers in the store today have the right to stand in line for 3 hours with hopes of getting a loaf of bread. Get used to it bitches!!!

03-20-2010, 07:43 PM	#3
sterlingice Hall Of Famer Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Back in Houston!	So, wait? Are these supposed to be insensitive things that are non-racial? Or anything that isn't racially insensitive? (EDIT: I'm mkaing this too complicated, aren't I?) SI __________________ Houston Hippopotami, III.3: 20th Anniversary Thread - All former HT players are encouraged to check it out! Janos: "Only America could produce an imbecile of your caliber!" Freakazoid: "That's because we make lots of things better than other people!" Last edited by sterlingice : 03-20-2010 at 07:49 PM.

03-20-2010, 08:23 PM	#6
Pumpy Tudors Bounty Hunter Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Pittsburgh, PA	"Bring your friends" __________________ No, I am not Batman, and I will not repair your food processor.

03-20-2010, 08:29 PM	#8
JPhillips Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Newburgh, NY	Respect Arnold Palmer or leave the store. __________________ To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.. - Mr. Rogers

03-20-2010, 09:24 PM	#11
Sun Tzu Pro Starter Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: In the thick of it.	"Sometimes, at night, the Ice Weasels come..." __________________ I'm still here. Don't touch my fucking bacon.

03-20-2010, 09:44 PM	#13
Senator FOFC's Elected Representative Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: The stars at night; are big and bright	Now I clown around, when I hang around with the Underground... __________________ "i have seen chris simms play 4-5 times in the pros and he's very clearly got it. he won't make a pro bowl this year, but it'll come. if you don't like me saying that, so be it, but its true. we'll just have to wait until then" imettrentgreen "looking at only ten games, and oddly using a median only, leaves me unmoved generally" - Quiksand

03-20-2010, 07:42 PM	#2
Abe Sargent Hall Of Famer Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Catonsville, MD	Anyone who actually believes in the materialist crap that Saving Money actually does make your Life Better like Wal-Unethicals says, out of the store. __________________ Check out my two current weekly Magic columns! https://www.coolstuffinc.com/a/?action=search&page=1&author[]=Abe%20Sargent

03-20-2010, 07:50 PM	#4
stevew Hall Of Famer Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: the yo'	"Anyone wearing pants with an elastic waistband, please leave the store"

03-20-2010, 08:21 PM	#5
BYU 14 Coordinator Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: The scorched Desert	"Anyone with more Fingers than teeth, please leave the store."

03-20-2010, 08:29 PM	#7
EagleFan Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Mays Landing, NJ USA	Careful, you'll get arrested. What happens if people that are any of those things get violent because of what you said...

03-20-2010, 08:54 PM	#10
NorvTurnerOverdrive College Benchwarmer Join Date: Jan 2008	da roof, da roof, da roof is on fi-yah... no, seriously. there's a fire on the roof. everyone needs to leave.

03-20-2010, 09:38 PM	#12
SteveMax58 College Starter Join Date: Dec 2006	"Attention Raymond...please come to the men's room, stall #2...and bring the rubber gloves and a hammer. Thank you!"

03-20-2010, 09:59 PM	#14
molson General Manager Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: The Mountains	"All Mexicans, please leave the store". DAMN IT - I'll try again in a few minutes.

03-21-2010, 06:27 AM	#15
Julio Riddols College Prospect Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Bryson Shitty, NC	"Attention Customers : Its the weekly Wal-Mart free for all minute! Any Item that leaves the store within the next minute is free of charge, our way of thanking you for making Wal Mart your choice for your everyday needs!" And I would try to sound as much like a recording as possible. __________________ Recklessly enthused, stubbornly amused. FUCK EA

03-21-2010, 06:31 AM	#16
Karlifornia Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: San Jose, CA	"All conservatives...please continue opposing our part-time employees the right to affordable health care" __________________ Look into the mind of a crazy man (NSFW) http://www.whitepowerupdate.wordpress.com

03-21-2010, 06:52 AM	#19
Dutch "Dutch" Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Tampa, FL	"WAL-MART: The High Cost of Low Price Blu-Ray is 50% off through Labor Day."

03-21-2010, 08:01 AM	#20
albionmoonlight Head Coach Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: North Carolina	Attention to the owner of a [red/blue/white/any common color] mid-sized car with a [whatever state you are in] license plate. Your car has just been hit in the parking lot. Please report to the manager at the front of the store.

03-21-2010, 08:05 AM	#21
Marc Vaughan SI Games Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Melbourne, FL	Could all mobiliyu scooter riders who aren't disabled please get up and walk for a change. Last edited by Marc Vaughan : 03-21-2010 at 08:05 AM.

03-21-2010, 08:54 AM	#22
Easy Mac Registered User Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Here	I would read tiger woods' texts... Or paradise lost

03-21-2010, 10:05 AM	#23
Warhammer Pro Starter Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Dayton, OH	"Go to Target"

03-21-2010, 10:33 AM	#24
digamma Torchbearer Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: On Lake Harriet	In Lawrence, KS, "Would Ali Farokhmanesh and Kwadzo Ahelegbe leave the store please? Like yesterday."

03-21-2010, 10:43 AM	#25
stevew Hall Of Famer Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: the yo'	Attention scooter riders. How much would you pay for a wookie.

03-21-2010, 11:01 AM	#26
Greyroofoo Pro Starter Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Alabama	"Show us your hooters!"

03-21-2010, 11:22 AM	#29
ColtCrazy College Starter Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Midwest	If you say the Hooters thing at Wal-Mart, you are sure to see multiple pairs. Usually on the same person. __________________ The Field Generals and Statis Pro Basketball Super League

03-21-2010, 01:01 PM	#32
Bad-example College Starter Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: san jose CA	Attention Wal-Mart customers, all Canadians must leave the store.

03-21-2010, 01:33 PM	#33
Flasch186 Coordinator Join Date: May 2002 Location: Jacksonville, FL	"Welcome to Wal Mart" ~Im supposedly self employed right now but I feel unemployed __________________ Jacksonville-florida-homes-for-sale Putting a New Spin on Real Estate! ----------------------------------------------------------- Commissioner of the USFL USFL

03-21-2010, 01:39 PM	#34
Solecismic Solecismic Software Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Canton, OH	"Attention Wal-Mart Shoppers: You can find affordable health care in aisle 7, next to the potato chips and cheese doodles."

03-22-2010, 09:29 PM	#35
Bea-Arthurs Hip H.S. Freshman Team Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: The D	All Aspartame products are now 1/2 off. Stock up America , it is good for you and tastes great! And dont forget to feed this to your children! They can wash it down with a nice glass of Flouride thats great for their teeth! Little long but it works. __________________ Sancte Michael Archangele, defende nos in proelio; contra nequitiam et insidias diaboli esto praesidium. Imperat illi Deus; supplices deprecamur: tuque, Princeps militiae coelestis, Satanam aliosque spiritus malignos, qui ad perditionem animarum pervagantur in mundo, divina virtute in infernum detrude.

03-23-2010, 10:48 AM	#37
Celeval Pro Starter Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Cary, NC, USA	Attention Wal-Mart customers: We have a special guest in the store today with us! Our regional manager is disguised as a regular employee - whoever can guess which one, and bring him or her to the customer service desk first will win a $100 gift certificate! Go!

03-23-2010, 11:25 AM	#38
EagleFan Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Mays Landing, NJ USA	Attention Wal-Mart shoppers! Get the fuck out!!! or Attention Wal-Mart shoppers! In honor of the most recent movement of our country towards socialism we would like to introduce our Bread Line Special. The first 100 customers in the store today have the right to stand in line for 3 hours with hopes of getting a loaf of bread. Get used to it bitches!!!

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