F*&%ing yard WOrk.

RendeR · 05-16-2009, 01:04 PM

SO I head outside on a day free of children and the wife to get some much needed yard work done.

Shovel out the sand box that is filled with water from oh...last September. Yummy smells there, made me want to toss my lunch.

Then I get the mower out and make ready to flatten the jungle I pass off as grass. Bout halfway through I hear a loud "CLANK" the mower slows to a stop and the top casing is sitting askew.

Looks like the thing tossed some bolts holding the starter(pull rope) attachment in place and it is now so much metal and plastic garbage.

Why is it that anytime something breaks down or goes wrong it is precisely in the MIDDLE of when you actually need it?

Fuck.

CU Tiger · 05-16-2009, 02:09 PM

well crap my mower just ate a belt....so I feel your pain. And I will have 40 people here in the next 3 hours

Flasch186 · 05-16-2009, 02:13 PM

so the other day I was out front when 2 ladies I sold a home to in the neighborhood are walking by. Theyre both cops...anyways, we get to talking about the landscaping and how me and the misses let it go and just couldnt keep up with it, and now were preggo and Im thinking of starting a co. blah blah blah so one of them volunteers to take it on. So I say go for it! This lady has worked sun up to sun down for 4 days and it looks great! cant believe it and it only cost a small amount of buying materials and then paying her for her time but wow, night and day....now the yard looks like and is an area you could hang out in! minus the moccasins of course.

Lathum · 05-16-2009, 02:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flasch186

so the other day I was out front when 2 ladies I sold a home to in the neighborhood are walking by. Theyre both cops...anyways, we get to talking about the landscaping and how me and the misses let it go and just couldnt keep up with it, and now were preggo and Im thinking of starting a co. blah blah blah so one of them volunteers to take it on. So I say go for it! This lady has worked sun up to sun down for 4 days and it looks great! cant believe it and it only cost a small amount of buying materials and then paying her for her time but wow, night and day....now the yard looks like and is an area you could hang out in! minus the moccasins of course.

lesbian cops?

tarcone · 05-16-2009, 02:52 PM

Im in the middle of building a raised vegetable garden in my back yard. I wasnt going to scrape the grass, but after scraping to lay the 1st row I need to do it all. I am not looking forward to that. Luckily it rained last night so the ground is moist. It is going to be 7 feet deep and 8 feet wide. It looks to be huge now that I have started it.
I am taking a break from it and typing this as I sweat. And it is only 68 degrees. Im hoping to get the walls built today.
Then I call the local grave digger. i have a friend who is a mortician. She said to call the grave digger for dirt. Free dirt makes me happy. Even though it may have a ghost or 2 attached.
I love doing these projects or at least seeing them when they are done.
I have come to realize, though, that manual labor is not for me. And I am glad I chose the profession I did.

Galaxy · 05-16-2009, 03:12 PM

Isn't it like pouring and thundering on and off where you live?

tarcone · 05-16-2009, 03:22 PM

That was last night.

Suburban Rhythm · 05-16-2009, 06:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lathum

lesbian cops?

21C · 05-16-2009, 08:03 PM

Dear Penthouse,

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flasch186

so the other day I was out front when 2 ladies I sold a home to in the neighborhood are walking by. Theyre both cops...anyways, we get to talking . . .

wade moore · 05-16-2009, 09:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flasch186

so the other day I was out front when 2 ladies I sold a home to in the neighborhood are walking by. Theyre both cops...anyways, we get to talking about the landscaping and how me and the misses let it go and just couldnt keep up with it, and now were preggo and Im thinking of starting a co. blah blah blah so one of them volunteers to take it on. So I say go for it! This lady has worked sun up to sun down for 4 days and it looks great! cant believe it and it only cost a small amount of buying materials and then paying her for her time but wow, night and day....now the yard looks like and is an area you could hang out in! minus the moccasins of course.

I don't mean to be a dick, although I'm sure it will come off that way..

But the guy who sent "the letter" to the neighborhood let his yard turn to crap?

CU Tiger · 05-16-2009, 10:54 PM

Damn most everyone is gone...except for 3 couples who are sleeping throughout my house...and some random chick who showed up who no one knows who she is...she is sitting on my deck smoking cheap cigars and she has no car here....weird.....anyway my lawnmower is still broke, my lawn has a mohawk, I dont give shit and I want to find that pung drink guy thread and then start a hustlker letter off my own.....if I can wake my wife up....or maybe Ill just go get the weird chick...

DanGarion · 05-17-2009, 05:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tarcone

Im in the middle of building a raised vegetable garden in my back yard. I wasnt going to scrape the grass, but after scraping to lay the 1st row I need to do it all. I am not looking forward to that. Luckily it rained last night so the ground is moist. It is going to be 7 feet deep and 8 feet wide. It looks to be huge now that I have started it.
I am taking a break from it and typing this as I sweat. And it is only 68 degrees. Im hoping to get the walls built today.
Then I call the local grave digger. i have a friend who is a mortician. She said to call the grave digger for dirt. Free dirt makes me happy. Even though it may have a ghost or 2 attached.
I love doing these projects or at least seeing them when they are done.
I have come to realize, though, that manual labor is not for me. And I am glad I chose the profession I did.

I'm planning to do one of those next year. This year I just used one of the existing planters that the previous owners had dug out. My tomatoes are going crazy, I have like 70 tomatoes total on my 8 plants but they are all still green!

tarcone · 05-17-2009, 05:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DanGarion

I'm planning to do one of those next year. This year I just used one of the existing planters that the previous owners had dug out. My tomatoes are going crazy, I have like 70 tomatoes total on my 8 plants but they are all still green!

Wow. Your going to be in tomatoes all winter long. Find those great salsa and spaghetti sauce recipes.

Got it built. Now Im waiting for the dirt guy to call me. Neighbor told me about a place that sells compost by the yard. Called Speed Grow. He used it in his vegi beds last season and loved it.

Draft Dodger · 05-17-2009, 05:53 PM

Friday I came home from work and decided to quickly mow the lawn - it was the first chance I'd had all week, and I knew I wouldn't have much time the rest of the weekend. It doesn't take much time. I just wanted to get it done.

I go down to the gas station to fill up the gas can. It's 5:30 so it's the one time the gas station is full. I wait. Patiently. Two cars cut me in line, but I'm chill. Finally, I realize that the idiots it the pump in front of me is not pumping gas, they are working on the engine. By this point, I'm all in on this spot, so I sit and wait (not patiently). Finally, my glowering pays off and the geniuses decide to move the car out of the way. Hurray.

I pull up to the pump, take out the gas can, pop in the debit card, wait for the authorization. Denied. I try again. It works. I start pumping. It shuts off at 6 cents. Something's wrong with the card. Now I'm pissed. I put the can away, get into the car, drive home, act like a total dick to my wife (who handles the money).

Still simmering after dinner, I grab the gas can and the other debit card and go down again. No lines this time - must be my night. Repeat the ritual as before...after a long authorization time, the card declines. Fine, this time I'm prepared - I have cash. I walk inside, give the girl $2, ask if the card system is down (*blank stare*), pump my gas, go home.

I get the kids all set up for their 257th viewing of Phantom Menace, go outside, get the lawn all set up for the first mowing of the season, grab the mower, fill it up, prime it, yank the cord. It starts right away. And stalls. I repeat. I does to. After 30 minutes, I give up. Fucking yardwork indeed.

JonInMiddleGA · 05-17-2009, 06:01 PM

Yard work = one of my remaining contributions to a healthier U.S. economy.

Pyser · 05-17-2009, 06:02 PM

i want a yard so i can post here

Radii · 05-17-2009, 06:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pyser

i want a yard so i can post here

I thought this was true too until I rented a house with a yard. I no longer give a shit about having a yard or being a homeowner for that matter.

Tasan · 05-17-2009, 06:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JonInMiddleGA

Yard work = one of my remaining contributions to a healthier U.S. economy.

Ditto. Never do yardwork that can be done for 10 bucks by the kid down the street.

Eaglesfan27 · 05-17-2009, 07:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JonInMiddleGA

Yard work = one of my remaining contributions to a healthier U.S. economy.

Big plus 1. I can't stand doing all of the landscaping work, so I don't.

tarcone · 05-17-2009, 09:37 PM

Ok, so I spent all day Saturday building my planter. It looks pretty good. Then i wake up this morning and look outside. The damn deck blocks the morning sun. I think, that it will be all right. But no. It doesnt see the sun until noon. aaaarrrggggghhhh. I figure I have maybe 5-6 hours of direct sunlight. So i go online and do some research. A good veggie garden needs 8+ hours of direct sunlight, but 6 hours will do if it is morning sunlight and not afternoon, intense sunlight. aaaaaaarrrrrggggghhhhh. I wasted a whole day. Now I have to start over in another spot. And spend more money.

I feel like an idiot.

RendeR · 05-18-2009, 10:02 AM

Amazingly enough it seems the mower simply threw some bolts and after some repair work and new bolts were added my brother in law managed to repair the mower and finished the lawn for me yesterday.

Go figure.

Lathum · 05-18-2009, 10:19 AM

This thread makes me happy I live in a condo.

RendeR · 05-18-2009, 10:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lathum

This thread makes me happy I live in a condo.

Fucking Elitist.

Honolulu_Blue · 05-18-2009, 10:30 AM

My lawn goes from looking like our house has been foreclosed to slightly unkempt.

I am going to buy a weed whacker/trimmer today, since things are getting a bit out of control and my only mower is something like this:

Lathum · 05-18-2009, 10:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RendeR

Fucking Elitist.

I said condo. not penthouse.

terpkristin · 05-18-2009, 10:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Honolulu_Blue

My lawn goes from looking like our house has been foreclosed to slightly unkempt.

I am going to buy a weed whacker/trimmer today, since things are getting a bit out of control and my only mower is something like this:

I'm contemplating buying a mower like this because my yard isn't all that big and it's hard to justify buying an electric mower for something so tiny. Also, I have a flower bed in the back and some stepping "stones" (large flat circular bricks) in the back, which might make using an electric mower more of a pain in the arse.

How is the cut on one of the old-school "manual" mowers?

/tk

MacroGuru · 05-18-2009, 11:00 AM

Yeah, the lawn care is included in part of our lease, right now...he has yet to send someone over, I have seen a garden snake the size of an Anaconda in the grass that goes up to my knees...

The kids when they see the snake, do not want to go outside, so...time to call him and tell him he has until tomorrow to get it cut or the price of the mower and my time will be deducted from the lease.

Honolulu_Blue · 05-18-2009, 11:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by terpkristin

I'm contemplating buying a mower like this because my yard isn't all that big and it's hard to justify buying an electric mower for something so tiny. Also, I have a flower bed in the back and some stepping "stones" (large flat circular bricks) in the back, which might make using an electric mower more of a pain in the arse.

How is the cut on one of the old-school "manual" mowers?

/tk

I like it. It's super easy to use and maintain. The cut is fine on normal grass, you may have to go over the same spot two or three times if it get's too thick, but other than that it works well. If the grass gets too high and thin (when it goes to seed), the slender blades of grass slip right through the mower. I have pull those out by hand. The same goes for certain types of weeds. If you stay on top of things, however, you shouldn't have a problem.

You will also likely need a trimmer/weed whacker. While there are hard to reach places all mowers can't get at, there are many more such places for the old-school ones.

Over all, I'd recommend such a mower for a small yard. Cheaper and you don't have to worry about upkeep, buying gas, and all of that nonsense.

It's also super quiet and doesn't pollute anything, so you can tell everyone how you've gone "green" and what not.

DeToxRox · 05-18-2009, 11:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Honolulu_Blue

I like it. It's super easy to use and maintain. The cut is fine on normal grass, you may have to go over the same spot two or three times if it get's too thick, but other than that it works well. If the grass gets too high and thin (when it goes to seed), the slender blades of grass slip right through the mower. I have pull those out by hand. The same goes for certain types of weeds. If you stay on top of things, however, you shouldn't have a problem.

You will also likely need a trimmer/weed whacker. While there are hard to reach places all mowers can't get at, there are many more such places for the old-school ones.

Over all, I'd recommend such a mower for a small yard. Cheaper and you don't have to worry about upkeep, buying gas, and all of that nonsense.

It's also super quiet and doesn't pollute anything, so you can tell everyone how you've gone "green" and what not.

I'm going to cruise around Royal Oak looking for a guy mowing his lawn with that thing so I can cat call you.

Honolulu_Blue · 05-18-2009, 11:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeToxRox

I'm going to cruise around Royal Oak looking for a guy mowing his lawn with that thing so I can cat call you.

I should be out there tonight, so feel free to cruise on by. I'm sure you will either run into me or Marian Hossa.

I really feel like posting that picture of Colin White right now, but it will not have the desired effect.

I need to consider a more appropriate response.

I will be back.

DanGarion · 05-18-2009, 11:38 AM

I honestly enjoy doing yard work. It's one of the biggest parts of exercise I get (takes about 4 hours) because we have a big back yard. I fill up an entire "yard waste" container from our refuse company just with the grass. Mowing is some of the best "dumb" work I don't think about anything and my mind just gets to relax. Until I wind a cord up after weed eating and the plug from the cord plunks me right in the mouth and gives me a fat lip.

Pumpy Tudors · 05-18-2009, 11:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Honolulu_Blue

I really feel like posting that picture of Colin White right now, but it will not have the desired effect.

maybe i can just die

Subby · 05-18-2009, 11:43 AM

I don't know - the healthiest folks I know always seem to be out working in their yard or garden.

JonInMiddleGA · 05-18-2009, 01:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Subby

I don't know - the healthiest folks I know always seem to be out working in their yard or garden.

So are many of the ones that drop dead in said yard, so there's a certain balance there I think.

flere-imsaho · 05-19-2009, 10:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flasch186

minus the moccasins of course.

...and this, my friends, is why I live in a cold state.

Quote:

Originally Posted by terpkristin

How is the cut on one of the old-school "manual" mowers?

I'll echo everything HB said. We have exactly the mower in the picture, and it works great as long as you don't let the grass go completely. The other tip I have is to mow in one direction one week, and then in a "crossing" direction the next week. So, mow east-west one week, and then north-south the next week.

stevew · 05-20-2009, 12:58 AM

Im supposed to be getting a beat up old lawn tractor off of one of my wife's co workers. Hopefully it runs well enough to get the job done. I'll slap a couple new blades on it.

May actually have to break down and buy a shed. It's not like I'll have money to get a real garage anytime soon.

05-16-2009, 02:13 PM	#3
Flasch186 Coordinator Join Date: May 2002 Location: Jacksonville, FL	so the other day I was out front when 2 ladies I sold a home to in the neighborhood are walking by. Theyre both cops...anyways, we get to talking about the landscaping and how me and the misses let it go and just couldnt keep up with it, and now were preggo and Im thinking of starting a co. blah blah blah so one of them volunteers to take it on. So I say go for it! This lady has worked sun up to sun down for 4 days and it looks great! cant believe it and it only cost a small amount of buying materials and then paying her for her time but wow, night and day....now the yard looks like and is an area you could hang out in! minus the moccasins of course. __________________ Jacksonville-florida-homes-for-sale Putting a New Spin on Real Estate! ----------------------------------------------------------- Commissioner of the USFL USFL

05-16-2009, 03:12 PM	#6
Galaxy Coordinator Join Date: Apr 2005	Isn't it like pouring and thundering on and off where you live? Last edited by Galaxy : 05-16-2009 at 03:13 PM.

05-17-2009, 05:53 PM	#14
Draft Dodger Coordinator Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Keene, NH	Friday I came home from work and decided to quickly mow the lawn - it was the first chance I'd had all week, and I knew I wouldn't have much time the rest of the weekend. It doesn't take much time. I just wanted to get it done. I go down to the gas station to fill up the gas can. It's 5:30 so it's the one time the gas station is full. I wait. Patiently. Two cars cut me in line, but I'm chill. Finally, I realize that the idiots it the pump in front of me is not pumping gas, they are working on the engine. By this point, I'm all in on this spot, so I sit and wait (not patiently). Finally, my glowering pays off and the geniuses decide to move the car out of the way. Hurray. I pull up to the pump, take out the gas can, pop in the debit card, wait for the authorization. Denied. I try again. It works. I start pumping. It shuts off at 6 cents. Something's wrong with the card. Now I'm pissed. I put the can away, get into the car, drive home, act like a total dick to my wife (who handles the money). Still simmering after dinner, I grab the gas can and the other debit card and go down again. No lines this time - must be my night. Repeat the ritual as before...after a long authorization time, the card declines. Fine, this time I'm prepared - I have cash. I walk inside, give the girl $2, ask if the card system is down (blank stare), pump my gas, go home. I get the kids all set up for their 257th viewing of Phantom Menace, go outside, get the lawn all set up for the first mowing of the season, grab the mower, fill it up, prime it, yank the cord. It starts right away. And stalls. I repeat. I does to. After 30 minutes, I give up. Fucking yardwork indeed. __________________ Mile High Hockey

05-17-2009, 06:01 PM	#15
JonInMiddleGA Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Behind Enemy Lines in Athens, GA	Yard work = one of my remaining contributions to a healthier U.S. economy. __________________ "I lit another cigarette. Unless I specifically inform you to the contrary, I am always lighting another cigarette." - from a novel by Martin Amis

05-18-2009, 10:02 AM	#21
RendeR Coordinator Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Buffalo, NY	Amazingly enough it seems the mower simply threw some bolts and after some repair work and new bolts were added my brother in law managed to repair the mower and finished the lawn for me yesterday. Go figure. __________________ http://wotlabs.net/s...8/signature.png http://wotlabs.net/sig_dark/na/banichi18/signature.png

05-16-2009, 02:09 PM	#2
CU Tiger Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Backwoods, SC	well crap my mower just ate a belt....so I feel your pain. And I will have 40 people here in the next 3 hours

05-16-2009, 02:52 PM	#5
tarcone Coordinator Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Pacific	Im in the middle of building a raised vegetable garden in my back yard. I wasnt going to scrape the grass, but after scraping to lay the 1st row I need to do it all. I am not looking forward to that. Luckily it rained last night so the ground is moist. It is going to be 7 feet deep and 8 feet wide. It looks to be huge now that I have started it. I am taking a break from it and typing this as I sweat. And it is only 68 degrees. Im hoping to get the walls built today. Then I call the local grave digger. i have a friend who is a mortician. She said to call the grave digger for dirt. Free dirt makes me happy. Even though it may have a ghost or 2 attached. I love doing these projects or at least seeing them when they are done. I have come to realize, though, that manual labor is not for me. And I am glad I chose the profession I did.

05-16-2009, 03:22 PM	#7
tarcone Coordinator Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Pacific	That was last night.

05-16-2009, 10:54 PM	#11
CU Tiger Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Backwoods, SC	Damn most everyone is gone...except for 3 couples who are sleeping throughout my house...and some random chick who showed up who no one knows who she is...she is sitting on my deck smoking cheap cigars and she has no car here....weird.....anyway my lawnmower is still broke, my lawn has a mohawk, I dont give shit and I want to find that pung drink guy thread and then start a hustlker letter off my own.....if I can wake my wife up....or maybe Ill just go get the weird chick...

05-17-2009, 06:02 PM	#16
Pyser Pro Rookie Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Los Angeles	i want a yard so i can post here

05-17-2009, 09:37 PM	#20
tarcone Coordinator Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Pacific	Ok, so I spent all day Saturday building my planter. It looks pretty good. Then i wake up this morning and look outside. The damn deck blocks the morning sun. I think, that it will be all right. But no. It doesnt see the sun until noon. aaaarrrggggghhhh. I figure I have maybe 5-6 hours of direct sunlight. So i go online and do some research. A good veggie garden needs 8+ hours of direct sunlight, but 6 hours will do if it is morning sunlight and not afternoon, intense sunlight. aaaaaaarrrrrggggghhhhh. I wasted a whole day. Now I have to start over in another spot. And spend more money. I feel like an idiot.

05-18-2009, 10:19 AM	#22
Lathum Favored Bitch #1 Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: homeless in NJ	This thread makes me happy I live in a condo.

05-18-2009, 10:30 AM	#24
Honolulu_Blue Hockey Boy Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Royal Oak, MI	My lawn goes from looking like our house has been foreclosed to slightly unkempt. I am going to buy a weed whacker/trimmer today, since things are getting a bit out of control and my only mower is something like this: __________________ *Steve Yzerman*: 1,755 points in 1,514 regular season games. 185 points in 196 postseason games. A First-Team All-Star, Conn Smythe Trophy winner, Selke Trophy winner, Masterton Trophy winner, member of the Hockey Hall of Fame, Olympic gold medallist, and a three-time Stanley Cup Champion. Longest serving captain of one team in the history of the NHL (19 seasons).

05-18-2009, 11:00 AM	#27
MacroGuru Coordinator Join Date: May 2003 Location: Utah	Yeah, the lawn care is included in part of our lease, right now...he has yet to send someone over, I have seen a garden snake the size of an Anaconda in the grass that goes up to my knees... The kids when they see the snake, do not want to go outside, so...time to call him and tell him he has until tomorrow to get it cut or the price of the mower and my time will be deducted from the lease. __________________ "forgetting what is in the past, I strive for the future"

05-18-2009, 11:38 AM	#31
DanGarion Coordinator Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: The Great Northwest	I honestly enjoy doing yard work. It's one of the biggest parts of exercise I get (takes about 4 hours) because we have a big back yard. I fill up an entire "yard waste" container from our refuse company just with the grass. Mowing is some of the best "dumb" work I don't think about anything and my mind just gets to relax. Until I wind a cord up after weed eating and the plug from the cord plunks me right in the mouth and gives me a fat lip. __________________ Los Angeles Dodgers Check out the FOFC Groups on Facebook! and Reddit! DON'T REPORT ME BRO!

05-18-2009, 11:43 AM	#33
Subby lolzcat Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: sans pants	I don't know - the healthiest folks I know always seem to be out working in their yard or garden. __________________ Superman was flying around and saw Wonder Woman getting a tan in the nude on her balcony. Superman said I going to hit that real fast. So he flys down toward Wonder Woman to hit it and their is a loud scream. The Invincible Man scream what just hit me in the ass!!!!! I do shit, I take pictures, I write about it: chrisshue.com

05-20-2009, 12:58 AM	#36
stevew Hall Of Famer Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: the yo'	Im supposed to be getting a beat up old lawn tractor off of one of my wife's co workers. Hopefully it runs well enough to get the job done. I'll slap a couple new blades on it. May actually have to break down and buy a shed. It's not like I'll have money to get a real garage anytime soon. Last edited by stevew : 05-20-2009 at 01:01 AM.

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