Stupidest injury you ever suffered?

[SirFozzie]

Mine is right now. Long story, but.. took a header into a file cabinet at work at speed.. lost one, maybe two teeth (depending on what the dentist says after the FIRST batch of stitches come out of my mouth) and a bruised clavicle.

So to distract me from my own stupidity, what your stupidest injury..

[JeeberD]

Hope you're feeling OK, Foz!

I've been incredibly lucky about not getting serious or semi-serious injuries so far in my life. The stupidest one would probably be when I was running up the stairs because it was my turn to play Tecmo Bowl and I kicked the top step, breaking my big toe...

[cartman]

We were seeing how many people we could fit into a single set of seats on the school bus. I was on top, #11. We turned a corner, and I went head first into the storage area above the seats across from me. Ended up splitting open the spot between my eye and my temple, and bled all over the place.

[SackAttack]

Came out of my bedroom early one morning wearing running shorts and a pair of socks. Socks + staircase = doom. I slipped on the first step and went head-over-ass down two flights of stairs. Nothing broke, but I was bruised as hell for a week.

[MacroGuru]

I was out bow and spear fishing, ended up stabbing myself in the leg with a spear....needed 7 stitches to close the wound and the doc said they could see the bone straight through the wound.

[SirFozzie]

Originally Posted by JeeberD

Hope you're feeling OK, Foz!

I've been incredibly lucky about not getting serious or semi-serious injuries so far in my life. The stupidest one would probably be when I was running up the stairs because it was my turn to play Tecmo Bowl and I kicked the top step, breaking my big toe...

Heheheh..

Well, drugs help, but drugs also put me out fast.

But drinking without a front tooth? talk about an embarassing thing!

[SackAttack]

Question, Foz: is the file cabinet made of wood?

[Balldog]

No real serious injuries but by far the dumbest.

At a bachelor party that was held after the Ohio State football game, so I had been drinking since noon. At about 10:30 at night a bunch of guys decide to start throwing a football around, its dark out, I am pretty well drunk. While attempting to recieve a pass one of the guys tips it and it hits my the end of my pinky finger. I suffered a dislocated pinky, broken pinky and strained ligaments in my pinky. This was about 6 months ago and it still does not work right.

[SirFozzie]

Originally Posted by SackAttack

Question, Foz: is the file cabinet made of wood?

Grrrr.. :F (Foz trying to stick his tounge out with the gap in my teeth).

Metal Filing cabinet.

[Swaggs]

Originally Posted by SirFozzie

lost one, maybe two teeth

pix pls

[condors]

after having a few too many cold ones,

i bet i could climb that tree jump on your roof and break into your room

i climb the tree, the branch leading towards the house looked soo much stronger on the ground, snap crack, smash smash smash smash smash smash thud, ummm i think i broke my freaking leg (nope just my ankle)

[Radii]

11-14 years old(I forget exactly).. playing barefoot in the back yard, like I did most every day. Ball goes over the fence into the neighbors yard, like it did most every day. No problem, we have permission to run around to their house and go back there. I decide I'll just jump over the little rose bushes in between the two yards instead of running around. I messed up somehow, and was barefoot, two thorns from the bush wedged firmly inside my foot a few inches between my big toe and the next toe over. Whoops.

[Glengoyne]

When I was in High School, my Church Youth Group had a "Pillow Fight". My best friend at the time, knew I had THE best pillow for pillow fights, and he wanted to borrow it. The pillow was great because it was an old feather pillow, that had become heavy over time. Seriously it was really heavy, and pretty solid for a pillow. I have a distinct feeling that I DO NOT want to know what made the pillow heavy. In any case I had used this pillow to smash my friends any time a pillow fight had come up during my youth.

My friend wanted to use it in the youth group pillow fight. I really didn't want to be mean to anyone, so I told him it was OK, as long as he didn't hit me. He agreed. When he showed up at church, he had shaken all of the mass of the pillow down into one end of the pillow case, spun the remainder of the pillow case, and duct taped it into a handle. He had created a pillow mace.

At some time during the wide open pillow fight, I went down. My best friend saw me, smiled, and proceeded to unload on me with my own pillow. I knew I didn't want that thing smacking me in the head, so I put my hand up as a feeble shield. My pinky finger caught the majority of the blow. It was apparently fully extended, and the energy of my friend's overhand swing was directed right down the axis of my straightened finger. This is how fingers are normally jammed, but in this case the blow shattered both knuckle joints in my pinky finger. The third, I think, bone in my pinky finger had actually penetrated the second(middle) bone, just like an arrow shot through the shaft of another arrow.

Eventhough I knew it was broken the instant it happened, it was pretty difficult to get anyone to believe me. My doctor was skeptical to the point that he nearly refused to have it x-rayed. He probably believes to this day that I was lying about how it happened. In any case, after reviewing what he described was an impressive x-ray, he sent my to an orthopedic surgeon. This guy was regarded at the time as one of the two best physicians in the world for orthopedic injuries between the elbow and the finger tips. He wanted to do surgery in a bad way. I insisted that it was a broken pinky. I wanted him to tape it to the finger next to it and let me go. We sort of debated treatment options, and I ended up with a cast. The cast enclosed the pinky and adjacent finger and extended all the way up my forearm.

It was a stupid injury becuase well hell I broke my finger in a pillow fight. It was stupid because it was my own pillow that was used against me. Furthermore it was stupid because I had been invited to go on a ski trip with a girl's family the very next day. This was a girl I very much wanted to date, and eventually did. Well since I wasn't much of a skiier, and I had this cast, and my Doctor said I wasn't supposed to jar my hand, I didn't go. The girl then asked my best friend to go in my place. Now that sucked.

[FrogMan]

received a puck in the mouth in a very low caliber peewee hockey game. I was a head referee at the time, puck behind the net, me in the corner, skating toward the net, slowly, when the kid swirled around and flipped the puck to my face with the back of his stick blade. No broken teeth, but 4-5 stitches. Something like 2 inside the lower lip, 3 on the outside. Worst was it happened on a Friday night, and we had a referee meeting the very next morning. Oh, the embarrassment of being in the middle of your fellow ref buddies. At the time, I was a linesman for high caliber games, a good prospect you could say, and there I was getting hit in the face by an 8 year old, oh well...

FM

[Schmidty]

I'm a basketball-aholic. I admit it. I can't go more than a few days without playing, so it was unbearable when I landed on another player's foot and snapped my left ankle about 5 years ago. I was supposed to be out of commission for 2 - 3 months, but I didn't even make it through 2 weeks.

12 days after the injury, I was unbelievably bored and pent up, so I decided to drive down to the gym and just shoot a few, since the boot my foot was in allowed me to walk pretty well, and I was on some pretty nice pain killers. That was my intention anyway, until I saw a few buddies playing a leisurely game of 21. Well, my competitive juices wouldn't allow me to just stand around shooting by myself, so I limped over to them and told them I wanted to play. They laughed, said I was insane, and said to take it easy on them. I laughed, but inside my competitive juices started flowing. I kept telling myself to just stay on the perimeter and be safe, but that didn't happen. I started banging a little bit in the paint for rebounds. Feeling more confident, I proceeded to (like a moron) jump for a rebound. I was punished for my stupidity when I landed on another guy's foot, and snapped my other damn ankle worse than the first one.

I went through 2 surgeries for that one, but I sure learned my lesson: Don't jump when playing 21 on a broken ankle.

[terpkristin]

I punched a brick wall and broke my hand. 8 weeks in a cast did nothing for it, they had to do surgery to re-break it and pin it.

Not so sure this is "stupid" because I don't think it contributed to the overall demise of my ankle, but when I hurt it initially (going up for a head ball playing soccer and came down on the outside of it), I apparently screamed bloody murder while writhing on the ground for awhile. People on the OTHER side of the field heard things snap, and my team had never heard me yell in pain before...needless to say, this freaked them out a bit. However, once I got my pain under control via breathing exercises, I decided to "test" my ankle to see if it would hold when I jumped on it. Since it did, I tried to play on it more (the ref wouldn't let me since he'd stopped the game for the injury). The next week, I really wanted to play so took over 1600 mg Ibuprofen. Not only was my damn ankle still throbbing like you wouldn't believe, that much vitamin I made me really sick to my stomach (go figure) and I saw three different soccer balls on the field at any iven time and had to figure out which one was the real one. Not my brightest week...

/tk

[DeToxRox]

Stage diving at a concert. I jumped off of a stage speaker for extra distance .. But I went into the pit, head first. Took some stitches at the show, then went back to stage diving .. Opened them back up ... So finally I decided enough was enough and I didn't stage dive the rest of the day.

[Coffee Warlord]

Believe I've described this lovely one before.

Scene: 1st Grade, Playground

Cast: Me, A Stick (aka Sword), and a Fireman's Pole

I decide it would be a great idea to slide headfirst down this pole, with the stick in my hand. Well. I kept sliding down, the stick however, was stopped by that damned thing known as the 'ground'. Stick proceeded to go straight into my eye, breaking my tear duct and causing me to have a lovely surgery to repair the damage.

[gstelmack]

Originally Posted by SackAttack

Came out of my bedroom early one morning wearing running shorts and a pair of socks. Socks + staircase = doom. I slipped on the first step and went head-over-ass down two flights of stairs. Nothing broke, but I was bruised as hell for a week.

Early in the morning, half asleep, Christmas night a year ago, dogs REALLY want to go out, so I'm rushing more than I should. No socks, but foot slips out, I land mostly on my left shoulder, slide down the steps yelling in pain, trip to the emergency room. I was sure I had broken the shoulder or upper arm, but X-Rays were negative. I just sprained/tore something, but it ended up healing okay. Still trying to figure out what we're going to do when we rip the carpeting off those steps...

Don't remember how young, maybe 6 or 8, at a summer camp. We're moving a wheelbarrow full of dirt, wheelbarrow starts to tip, and for some unknown reason I turn, grab the side with both hands, and take the far edge of the metal wheelbarrow across the bridge of my nose. Wheelbarrow still spills everywhere (I didn't have a prayer of actually holding it up and stopping it from going over), but luckily no damage other than a bloody nose.

[bigphesta]

About a week ago. It's late, I've taken my nightly dose of sleeping pills and drank my standard 6 pack and heading to bed. Well I forget that the city was replacing our water valve and the water would be off from midnight to 2 am. It's about 1:50 so I figured the water to be back on. Its not. A slow trickle comes out, but enough to wet my toothbrush and I start filling my glass. The glass fills, I turn off the water and continue brushing.

I am about finished so I turn on the water to get it running, well seems that in the time I turned the water off and turned it back on they fixed the valve. It EXPLODED out. I jumped... cause at 2 am I wasn't expecting that. Well my head goes back but I'm still pumping my arm finishing up the brushing of my teeth. My head snaps back forward at the same instance that my arm goes toward my teeth used to be... well now my nose is there. I shoved that toothbrush about 6 inches up my nose. It was, as Seinfeld said, a ONE IN A MILLION SHOT.

Not sure if you've ever done it, but toothpaste in the nose BURNS. So I quickly yank that toothbrush out only to have about a quart of blood follow.

So here I am, half asleep, my nose is burning from the toothpaste, it's pooring blood, I still have a mouthfull of used toothpaste foam in my mouth, the water from the faucet is still exploding into the sink, and my heart is racing from the exlposion in what was my sink - which is now a pink color from the blood mixing with the Crest.

As if this wasn't enough, I'm holding my head up trying to keep the blood aimed at the sink and decide to first finish the teeth brushing experience. Reached for the cup of full water, which I couldn't see, and proceeded to spill it all over my leg.

Somehow I fixed the mess. Just stuck my head under the sink and let the water run over my nose and swallowed some water. It was by FAR the worst experience brushing my teeth ever.

[Leonidas]

Leaning over a radio, trying to tune it, I leaned right down into the antenna and did significant injury to my eye. Caused me to miss half a workday to see the doctor, but I totally refused to file a safety report. A few weeks before I missed a morning to get x-rays after hurting my ankle running and it got back to me from my Commander because it was discussed at the base staff meeting. There was damn sure no way I was going to report gouging my eye on a radio antenna after that.

[KevinNU7]

Man some of these are real good.

[KevinNU7]

#1

When I was in 5th grade me and my best friend were in his back yard working on on our swing. He had just gotten a mini batting cage for his birthday. The kind where on guy tosses the ball straight in front of you (down on one knee) and you hit the ball into the net.

Anyways I was the guy on one knee. We only has maybe 10 baseballs and because of this we went through them fairly quickly. During one batch my friend had missed a ball and it basically laid right in front of me at the "homeplate". I tossed up our final ball and then bent over to pick up the ball at the plate.

My friend proceeded to swing at the ball I tossed and cranked me in the head. I got two black eyes and a severe concousion that kept me out of school for a month. I looked awesome though when I did go back.

[BigJohn&TheLions]

I decided to try rollerskating again. I bought a $200 pair of skates and decided Central Park would be a good place to get my legs under me...

I wiped out about 20 seconds later. I absolutely crushed my wrist (plate & seven screws) and broke my L2 vertebrae. 2 1/2 years later and I still am in pain. I am up to about 20 pushups before the wrist feels like it's about to fall apart. Can't even do a situp because of the back.

[KevinNU7]

#2

When I was in high school I worked at a Little Caesar for about a year. One of the nightly tasks was to clean the dough flattener at the end of the night. The dough flattener was a small machine that has two stainless steel tubes that run in opposite directions one right on top of the other. You load a ball of dough in between the two tubes and it comes out on the other side flat. There is a safety sheild to protect your fingers from ever getting anywhere near the tubes.

Well this thing is a bitch to clean because you can't get to the tubes because the shield is in the way. So everyone takes the shield of and uses a spatula against the tubes (while they are running) to get any dough off of the tubes.

One time the spatula slipped off of one of the tubes and basically got sucked into the middle between the two tubes. Me being the moron that I am didn;'t instantly let go of the spatula and it grabbed me ring and pinky finger on one had. The machine jammed and me pink was pretty mashed.

I got it out of there pretty easily and the pinky was broken. This actually wasn't a big deal because I have broken my pinkies probably about 20 times from playing volleyball. It got so ridiculous that my senior year I always wore a brace on each hand to link my pinkies to ring fingers for every game.

[Radii]

Originally Posted by bigphesta

About a week ago. It's late, I've taken my nightly dose of sleeping pills and drank my standard 6 pack and heading to bed.

So did this cause anyone elses's bullshit meter to go off?

[Ksyrup]

Some of you might remember this story. I told it a long time ago...


I'm about 15 or so, living in Atlanta. My mom decides that we're going to play "secret santa" for some friends 2 houses down. So every night, either my brother or I had the pleasure of taking a gift to the front door, ringing the doorbell, and running like a bat out of hell home.

At first, this was pretty easy, since they weren't expecting it. A few days into it, and the kids were staked out at the front window waiting for us, so the pressure was mounting. It's my turn one night, and I know I've got to get the hell out of there as soon as I can or I'm going to get caught, so the minute I hit the doorbell, I head for their backyard to cut across to our house. And I mean, I'm booking it...until I hit the middle neighbors' fence, that is. Damn near torn my penis right off - tore my jeans right at the zipper and flipped me over the fence head-first, giving me a nice case of whiplash to go with the gash on my penis.

Explaining what the hell happened to me when I got home was fun. Having my mom peering over my dad's shoulder as he makes sure I didn't sever my dick was yet another highlight.


The other stupid injury I had was the first broken bone in my life - 2.5 years ago I broke my ankle while jogging. It sounds funnier than it was, since what happened was that I hit a piece of uneven pavement near the curb - I wasn't just running along and tripped myself. However, not knowing how bad it was, I walked (limped) home on it a mile. Not good times. But funny enough for everyone to laugh at me whenever it comes up.

[Swaggs]

Originally Posted by DeToxRoxDVHStyle

Stage diving at a concert. I jumped off of a stage speaker for extra distance .. But I went into the pit, head first. Took some stitches at the show, then went back to stage diving .. Opened them back up ... So finally I decided enough was enough and I didn't stage dive the rest of the day.

Least surprising injury to an FOFC member.

Originally Posted by Coffee Warlord

Believe I've described this lovely one before.

Scene: 1st Grade, Playground

Cast: Me, A Stick (aka Sword), and a Fireman's Pole

I decide it would be a great idea to slide headfirst down this pole, with the stick in my hand. Well. I kept sliding down, the stick however, was stopped by that damned thing known as the 'ground'. Stick proceeded to go straight into my eye, breaking my tear duct and causing me to have a lovely surgery to repair the damage.

Most cringe-worthy injury to an FOFC member.

[Joe]

is it wrong that i'm laughing my ass off while reading the injuries in this thread?

[Franklinnoble]

Originally Posted by George W Bush

is it wrong that i'm laughing my ass off while reading the injuries in this thread?

If it's wrong, I don't wanna be right.

[Desert Dweeb]

This one happened to my brother, but it is still a classic.

He was playing Madden as the Cardinals vs. the Cowboys. He insists that the game cheats (also mentioned by the Sports Guy during the "no fucking way" game), and that since Madden had such a woodie for the Cowboys, they could never lose to the lowly Cardinals. He had been playing for a few seasons in a dynasty mode, without ever beating the Cowboys.

One night, he is playing a game against them. He kicks a field goal to tie the game with under two minutes to play. He kicks off, and Aikman drives them to around the 35 yard line. He is now swearing about how he has held them the whole game, and now they are making yet another game winning drive. However, he picks off a pass, and returns it for a TD with about 10 seconds left.

He was so excited that he jumped up in the air. Unfortunately, he got a little tangled in the controller cord, and did a face plant into a file cabinet (Sorry Foz). His wife hears the commotion, runs upstairs, and finds him groggy and his face completely covered with blood. She rushes him to the hospital. He ends up with a broken nose, and a few stitches in his face.

The best part is that to this day, he is still mad at her, because she turned off the playstation, and didn't save his moment of glory.

[Radii]

Originally Posted by Desert Dweeb

The best part is that to this day, he is still mad at her, because she turned off the playstation, and didn't save his moment of glory.

Absolutely beautiful And I agree!

if I ever hurt myself while playing PS2, I'll remember when I yell for help to yell: "Honey, call 911, and DONT TOUCH THE PS2"

[Eaglesfan27]

I was 10 years old and chasing a cute girl up a slide. I get to the top and she is already at the bottom having slid down very quickly. I'm smiling at her and she is smiling at me, and I'm not looking where I'm going. I'm still not sure how the heck I did this, but I went to sit on the slide to go down and somehow fell off the side of it and fell about 8-10 feet and landed straight on my back. No injury at the time as I bounced up and started chasing the girl, but my back hurts periodically now..


Second story: Playing soccer as an 11 year old on a muddy field. I was running quickly, and passed the ball to a teammate. I start running to get the return pass and I see a mud puddle in front of me that was about 3 feet wide at the most. I decide to leap it and keep running. Great plan but I didn't clear the puddle and as I landed first one foot then the other slid out from under me. I naturally reached back to brace my fall. As a result, I not only landed in a mud puddle becoming soaked with mud, but I also shattered my left wrist.

[amdaily]

I got first road bike in early fall. Was riding it on a paved trail a few weeks later that happened to be covered by alot of leaves.

I thought I was going slow enough, but I slide right off the trail on a turn and the whole right side of my body and the right handbars impacted a tree at a rather high speed. My thumb took the brunt of the hit as it was cradled in the handlebar apparatus and must have bent backwards about 120 degrees. My helmet-less face slammed right into the tree and deformed my sunglasses pretty bad.

I sat down against the tree to make sure I was still in one piece, but next thing I know I wake up in a cold sweat with my head on the ground. More then a few seconds couldn’t have passed, by some woman passing by stopped to ask if everything was already. I, of course, acted like I didn’t know what she was talking about and picked up the bike. When I tried to shift gears I realized my thumb was seriously injured. I was still 10 miles from home, but managed get back without further incident. X-rays were negative on the thumb, but I could still feel pain in it a month later.

Needless to say, I haven’t ridden the bike since and plan to put an ad in the paper for it next month. Back to mountain bikes for me

[JeffR]

Broken big toe trying to play rugby while barefooted. Tore a nice-sized divot out of the ground while breaking it, too.

[thealmighty]

Some of this shit is giving me goosebumps when I think of the pain involved.

[hhiipp]

When I was 3 I was playing with a pencil and a "Funpad" basically a small book that had puzzles, mazes, pictures to color etc etc. So I had a few of these laying on the floor and got up to do something still with pencil in hand.. and I took off running, hit one of the books and slipped. The pencil embedded itself in the bridge of my nose, no more than 1/4 an inch either direction and I probably would have lost an eye.

Fast forward a few years, I was about 7 or so, parents got me plastic surgery, I still had some of the lead in my nose and they were also trying to repair some of the scarring. My only orders for this thing were don't get it wet and don't get hit in the nose. . . so being the intelligent kid I was, at the babysitters house I went swimming with some of the other kids. There was this one little kid (I'm a sucker for kids) who wanted to play with the rings, he would throw them in the water, I'd pick it up with my feet and hand it back to him to throw again. So one time he winds up and throws it, felt like a 100mph fastball, and smacked me right square in the nose.

21 years after the initial accident, I'm still blessed with a nice scar right between my eyes.

[wishbone]

I went snow tubing a few years ago and on my 2nd trip down the hill I hit a bump went flying and saw some stars. I shake it off and start walking up the hill again but there is this pain in my foot. I figure nothing could happen in the snow and it'll go away in a few minutes. 4 hours later, as we are driving home, my toe is throbbing and it really hurts. I'm wearing leather work boots, a pair of socks, a plastic bread bag (I wanted to stay dry) and a pair of thick socks. As I peel off the first sock I see that the thick sock is dark red instead of it's normal white.
When we get home, I find that my toe is 1.5 times it's normal size, hurts a lot and the nail is wiggling around like a loose tooth. The next day we go to the doctor and he burns a hole through the nail with a pen-looking thing and proceeds to drain the fluid that has built up. At first it hurts, then it gets painful, then my toe starts to whistle as he squeezes the blood and pus out. The nail fell off a week later

Toes should not whistle.

[Glengoyne]

Originally Posted by wishbone

...

Toes should not whistle.

Ouch.

I've drained nails by drilling through them before, in fact my father had a special bit for finger and toe nails. However I've never felt anything but tremendous and instantaneous relief when doing so. To have enough swelling that it whistled is impressive.

Again ouch.

[AZSpeechCoach]

When I was 10, my father and I were play wrestling in the living room. He was flat on his back, and I stood on his chest. He shifted, and I came down on one of my shoulders. I immediately knew something was wrong, and ran to my bedroom. One hospital trip later, the diagnosis is a greensick fracture of my left collarbone. To make matters worse, I was in a local production of "The Wizard of Oz" as a munchkin. We still had a few weeks in the rehearsal process I'm in a sling for 2 weeks, and in a brace for 6 weeks. It made the dancing very awkward. I'm lucky that the director didn't fire my ass.

[duckman]

About two years ago, I was doing some tune-up work on my truck when I dropped the extension and spark plug socket into an odd spot in the engine. When I tried to dig out the socket, I pinched my hand, shot striaght up, and hit my head on the hood. I immediately when down on my ass and sat there for about 30 minutes before regaining my senses. I went around for about two days with these terrible headaches before I went to see a doctor. After the CAT scan, they found that I had a concussion, so I was off duty for about a week. It was fun having to fill out an accident report about having smack my head on the hood of my truck. I still hear about it from my Air Force buddies.

[BigJohn&TheLions]

Another one.

I was changing the oil in my old Sunbird and noticed the word seemed to be moving. I got out from under the car very quickly and noticed that the jack was sinking into the asphalt. It was about to slip off the jack and I stupidly tried to push the car back up onto the jack before it fell.

Brilliant idea the car still fell, but now when it did the hood jumped off the prop-rod and hit me in the forehead. I came to laid out in the street with blood everywhere. It must not have been too long, because nobody had bothered to notice me laying in the street.

I didn't have insurance, so I just put neosporin and gauze on it and tied it tight with a bandana. It took three days to stop bleeding. The good part is that the 1-1/2 inch scar is barely noticable, where if it had been stiched up I would have a Frankenstein scar...

[Dr. Sak]

I was 8 years old and going outside to play with my friends. I walk out into the sunporch and open the door. Well the door sticks on my dog's chain and comes back and hits me in the head. I am full of rage at that point and put my fist through the window. No stiches but I couldn't pitch for 2 weeks.

Another one was when I was 10. I was using a hoe (a gardening tool) to help my dad in the garden. He went inside to get a drink and i went to take a break. For some odd reason i thought it would be good for me to hang the hoe in the tree and rest. Well it didnt stay there too long as it fell out and one of the prongs went right into my foot. It went into my foot about an inch. I pulled it our real quick and never said a word to my dad. Looking back I was stupid for not going to get a tetnus shot.

[INDalltheway]

Originally Posted by hhiipp

I'm still blessed with a nice scar right between my eyes.

Me too! Mine isn't very noticable though. I actually have two stories to tell.

#1 is about the scar between my eyes. I had to be the most unlucky kid on this day. I was about 5 or 6 years old, and my brothers, myself, and a few neighbor kids were playing wiffle ball.. My brother got really pissed off about the game for some reason, and started going nuts. He was at the time 9 years old, and very big for his age. So everyone ran to my neighbors yard, which sits about 10 ft lower and is seperated by an alley, and they also have a 5 ft fence. Well my brother is still throwing his hissy fit and decides to chuck one of the wiffle bats. This bat had one of plastic tips on the end that can actually become pretty sharp with time. Well being behind the fence I figured I was pretty safe. The only thing I remember is taking a few steps, then at the last second seeing this bat flying. I wake up in an emergency room in a panic, not knowing what the hell happened. The absoulute worst part of this story is that my guilty brother ran and hid in my house. Meaning I couldn't be sent to the hospital imediately. What are the chances of getting hit with a sharp point on the end of a wiffle ball bat from 30 or so feet? I was pretty well bruised and with 8 stiches. I now have the cool Harry Potter scar.

#2 happened just recently. Many people don't really know what happened because I am so embarresed about it. (I actually made up a different story). Well after PE class I decide I am gonna show everyone what I can do (ended up being 1 person). I go up to grab the rim, grab it, hang on it then let go. All is going well, but i decide to be off balance heading down on all fours. I try to stop myself with my wrists and also hit my knees. I had so much momentum going down, that I couldn't stop myself. So along with very sore wrists, and bruised knees, I drilled my chin on the floor. The thing split right along the jaw line needing 7 stiches. The worst part was I didn't really realize my chin was that bad. I walked to the locker room, and someone said, "What the hell happened to your chin?" I feel it, felt weird as shit and blood was on my fingers. I went to the mirror, and I immediately felt sick to my stomach. I showed as many people as I could because it was really sick.

[TreeInNewEngland]

Two Octobers ago, I was just hanging out in the forest with my friends and this guy with crazy eyes pulled up in his car. He was swearing about his shoes or socks or something, and all of a sudden he started pummelling me. Right in the trunk. He totally drew sap and knocked some bark off. I couldn't believe it. It was totally unprovoked and it really embarassed me in front of my tree friends.

[Fonzie]

Originally Posted by TreeInNewEngland

Two Octobers ago, I was just hanging out in the forest with my friends and this guy with crazy eyes pulled up in his car. He was swearing about his shoes or socks or something, and all of a sudden he started pummelling me. Right in the trunk. He totally drew sap and knocked some bark off. I couldn't believe it. It was totally unprovoked and it really embarassed me in front of my tree friends.

I'm not inclined to razz poor Foz like some others are, but that was pretty good.

[Neuqua]

Originally Posted by TreeInNewEngland

Two Octobers ago, I was just hanging out in the forest with my friends and this guy with crazy eyes pulled up in his car. He was swearing about his shoes or socks or something, and all of a sudden he started pummelling me. Right in the trunk. He totally drew sap and knocked some bark off. I couldn't believe it. It was totally unprovoked and it really embarassed me in front of my tree friends.

Funniest thing I have ever read here at FOFC.

[MrBug708]

Zing!

[Swaggs]

Originally Posted by Fonzie

I'm not inclined to razz poor Foz like some others are, but that was pretty good.

Maybe we shouldn't name names. This tree might want to press charges if he finds out who did it.

[illinifan999]

I was at a friend's house and we were swimming. He has a slide that's about 10 ft off the ground. We somehow got the brilliant idea to jump off the top of the slide into the pool. Needless to say when I jumped I came up about 6 inches too short and slammed the edge of the concrete surrounding the pool feet first, i then proceeded to collapse into the pool and smash my head into the bottom. See I was the guinea pig and we didnt think about how shallow the pool was. Not a good day, no serious injuries but enough that I know not to do that again.

I was about 11 and we were playing football in a friend's backyard. Well I run a fly pattern down field, and it's an absolutely great ball thrown. Leading me perfect, running full speed easy TD. Little did I know a tree had decided to play Brian Dawkins. That was a fun concussion.

This one happened to our SS when we were practicing during 7th grade. He decided he didn't need to wear a cup. In order to understand this story you need to know about his dad. He's nuts. During infield, he would actually hit homeruns. One of our drills for indoors was he'd stand at the free throw line and would hit them as hard as he could at us while we were on the baseline. Now his dad hits him an absolute screamer. It one hops right into our SS's package. Now I think he almost died, but somehow he came back onto the field a half hour later. And it happens again. At this point the whole team is nearly dieing from laughter. Our SS was just laying on the ground, I do not think he will ever have babies.

Probably my worst one. I was 8 and skiing for like the second time. Well I decided that I was so good I could hit this pretty big jump. Well I landed on my face, on ice. My whole face was bleeding. The worst part was school pictures were the next week.

Otherwise breaking my arm playing football was thrilling because the play looked like I broke my neck so I got to be taken off on a stretcher and ride an ambulance to the hospital where they gave me morphine. Wisdom teeth getting pulled was awesome cause when I woke up I couldn't walk. Then I got to eat ice cream everyday.