Facebook posts so pathetic they belong in this thread!!!

[albionmoonlight]

Not a specific post here, but a general category of posts. I have facebook friends on the left and the right. And they will post something making fun on the other guys. And tag it with something like "I don't care what side you are on politically, this is JUST TOO FUNNY NOT TO POST"

First, a rehash of a common meme is, almost without exception, not too funny not to post. Even if someone was able to make it about Obama or Romney. Second, political jokes are almost always funny to the people on the side of the joke, and almost never funny to the other side.

[sovereignstar v2]

A friend just described her boyfriend as her "night and shining armor".

[Suicane75]

Well, for all intensive purposes, he is.

[Izulde]

Parish the ought he isn't.

[stevew]

Now and days people do not know the proper expressions.

[Suburban Rhythm]

I do not know the poster in this case, this is one of those "so-and-so has commented on a wall post", a friend is responding to someone else.

Thank you _____ for the pitcher frame i love it it was sweet

The idea that an adult typed that blows my mind

[Autumn]

I know, you would think typing would have been too difficult for them.

[IlliniCub]

This one is pretty bad "Mom said my bf has to move out cuz she thinks he is a gangster when he is not we r going to go get a police report saying what all he has done and if he is in a gang I need advise what do I do I don't want him moving out.:'(:'("

[Julio Riddols]

Originally Posted by Suburban Rhythm

The idea that an adult typed that blows my mind

Maybe it was a frame for pitchers. Or maybe it was a picture of a pitcher that they put in the frame...

[JonInMiddleGA]

Originally Posted by albionmoonlight

Second, political jokes are almost always funny to the people on the side of the joke, and almost never funny to the other side.

I dunno, my latest one -- a shot at Clinton -- came from a lefty.

[Suburban Rhythm]

Originally Posted by IlliniCub

This one is pretty bad "Mom said my bf has to move out cuz she thinks he is a gangster when he is not we r going to go get a police report saying what all he has done and if he is in a gang I need advise what do I do I don't want him moving out.:'(:'("

I never realized this was an option. Let's form a band, create an annoying, yet catchy jingle, and start freepolicebackgroundcheck.com

[sterlingice]

Originally Posted by JonInMiddleGA

I dunno, my latest one -- a shot at Clinton -- came from a lefty.

Did it involve a binder full of women?

SI

[JonInMiddleGA]

Originally Posted by sterlingice

Did it involve a binder full of women?

Yep, it did indeed

[sterlingice]

Just seemed like a Clinton joke waiting to happen

SI

[AnalBumCover]

Originally Posted by sterlingice

Just seemed like a Clinton joke waiting to happen

SI

Of course, I got this from a FB post, with the caption: "I'm not trying to say anything political by sharing this, but I had to laugh."

[JonInMiddleGA]

[JPhillips]

I'm being overrun by posts like this:

I support candidate X.

If you support candidate Y here's how you will destroy my life.

[albionmoonlight]

Originally Posted by AnalBumCover

Of course, I got this from a FB post, with the caption: "I'm not trying to say anything political by sharing this, but I had to laugh."

OK. That kinda completely obliterates by point up above. Because that's pretty freakin funny. And I don't care what side you are on

[Suburban Rhythm]

Originally Posted by JPhillips

I'm being overrun by posts like this:

I support candidate X.

If you support candidate Y here's how you will destroy my life.

Do you reply "Mission accomplished!" ?

[Ben E Lou]

Not sure what he's trying to accomplish by posting on FB, but more power to him...

To my friends and FB family:

There is someone who I have been having a serious problem with for years and, as you all know, I like to confront the people who I have issues with if they won't meet me face-to-face.

There is a man from Columbus, Ga. named Driskell Lang. His nickname is 'Mo'. He is a principal in Atlanta and we went to FVSU together. He is a member of my illustrious fraternity... but, his family members had to threaten the fraternity with a lawsuit because they didn't want to accept him... or, at least that's what the members of the fraternity said. So, that might be the ONLY part of this story that is not exact and true!

Now, this man has been going around lying about me for years. We arrived at FVSC in 1988. He was a friend of my cousin Tank, who pledged Sigma while at FT. Valley.

Tank and Driskell were great friends previously, but when Driskell pledged Omega and Tank pledged Sigma, their friendship became strained. And then, according to Tank, Driskell began lying and subsequently their friendship dissolved.

Now, I was not close to Driskell, because people told me that he was a big liar and I don't like to be around liars.

Anyway, everyone knew that one day I wanted to pledge Omega... and, now I am an Omega!!!

However, Driskell (Moe.).. got mad at me om college because I was sleeping with two women who he wanted to sleep with. One ended up being my girlfriend... and, he didn't sleep with her. But the other was his side piece before I met her. But, when she got with me, she cut the p*ssy off to him.

I didn't care one way or the other as long as I got my piece, but she said that he wasn't putting it down like me, so she stopped his supply! (I can support my statements by having the two women vouch for me, if it comes to that.)

So, when Driskell Lang saw the girl that he had previously slept with, coming into my apartment... I heard him say to her, "So you're with Works now?" And, the girl laughed and said, "Yep!... (as she and I smiled)... You're trying to get with me while you're standing upstairs at your girlfriend's door?"

You see, Driskell Lang already had a girlfriend, but he cheated on her ever chance he got. She lived directly upstairs from my apartment. I have proof of that, too. And, she was AND IS a great woman. He's married to her now.

So... because of my respect for her.. I wouldn't be putting this out here like that except for the fact that Driskell Lang is STILL going around lying on me. He has been telling people ever since 1988 that I'm gay.

Now... I have never been, nor will I ever be gay. But, I don't have any problems with anyone who is. That's not for me to judge. God loves EVERYONE and I have a gay family member who has always been nice to me... so, why should care about what he or any other adult do.

However, I do have problems with Driskell Lang lying on me. He did it to try to keep me from being a Que... because he thought that it would keep me out of this prestigious fraternity.

HOWEVER... Omega is the best fraternity EVER... and God loves true Omegas... AND, I am a TRUE OMEGA, so I couldn't have been kept out if God is on my side.

And, He IS on my side!... because I AM AN OMEGA by the grace of God!

So, Driskell Lang... you can't stop a true man of God!

You are a cat-ass Que!

Let's take this to 'THE GREEN!'!

I make this challenge to cat-ass Marvin Broadwater, Sr. also!

I have tried to handle these matters privately, but you all made this a public matter.

And, you CAN'T sue, because I ran this by my attorney and he said that it's not slander if it's the truth. And... as we all know... (smile) ... The truth is the truth!

I'M OWT

[Ben E Lou]

Oh...and fwiw, I do not know and have never heard of Driskell Lang before this post, but I can confirm that, living in Atlanta in the 90s, well before Facebook, a rumor did reach my ears that the guy who posted this was gay, so in fairness to him, I guess, *someone* did start that rumor.

[JediKooter]

Man, being in a fraternity must be very difficult.

[Passacaglia]

Originally Posted by Ben E Lou

Oh...and fwiw, I do not know and have never heard of Driskell Lang before this post, but I can confirm that, living in Atlanta in the 90s, well before Facebook, a rumor did reach my ears that the guy who posted this was gay, so in fairness to him, I guess, *someone* did start that rumor.

My hunch was that he didn't exist, but a lot of info can be found about him on the google.

[sterlingice]

Originally Posted by albionmoonlight

OK. That kinda completely obliterates by point up above. Because that's pretty freakin funny. And I don't care what side you are on

It's the horribly photoshopped Clinton expression and the all too recognizable Obama expression that makes it for me

SI

[Izulde]

Originally Posted by JediKooter

Man, being in a fraternity must be very difficult.

Hells nawh. I miss it.

[JediKooter]

Originally Posted by Izulde

Hells nawh. I miss it.

I thought you 'never leave' a fraternity?

[JonInMiddleGA]

Originally Posted by JediKooter

I thought you 'never leave' a fraternity?

Just when you think you're out ...

[I. J. Reilly]

Everything that guy says may be true, but the fact remains that Driskell “Mo” Lang is one of the most kick-ass names I’ve ever heard. So you lose Omega Man.

And I bet ol’ Marvin Broadwater, Sr. was having a good chuckle reading this until he got to the end.

[molson]

What does is mean to take something to "THE GREEN!"?

[JediKooter]

Originally Posted by JonInMiddleGA

Just when you think you're out ...

They pull you back in.

[Draft Dodger]

he's gay

[Honolulu_Blue]

Originally Posted by Draft Dodger

he's gay

cat-ass Draft Dodger

[Izulde]

Originally Posted by JediKooter

I thought you 'never leave' a fraternity?

Active live is completely different from alumni status.

[AnalBumCover]

I remember, when trixie was still with us, we used to torture her. Maker her sneeze, pretend that we were going to put her in the shower, we even put her in the fridge for a second. OMG... We were so mean... LOL. I loved her tho. RIP Trixie.

He was talking about his childhood pet cat. Kinda makes you wonder, what killed the cat?

[sterlingice]

Better than human, I guess

SI

[JediKooter]

Originally Posted by Izulde

Active live is completely different from alumni status.

The part I don't understand is the 'instant' hatred of another fraternity just because they have a different set of random greek letters than what some other fraternity has, that makes them want to bash each others heads in. It's like individual pockets of Lord of the Flies, but with trying to get laid and drunk all the time.

The part I do understand is the alumni status, where networking can be very valuable.

[Honolulu_Blue]

Originally Posted by JediKooter

The part I don't understand is the 'instant' hatred of another fraternity just because they have a different set of random greek letters than what some other fraternity has, that makes them want to bash each others heads in.

That's just very typical "us vs. them" human nature.

[lighthousekeeper]

Originally Posted by Honolulu_Blue

cat-ass Draft Dodger

gold

[JediKooter]

Originally Posted by Honolulu_Blue

That's just very typical "us vs. them" human nature.

True. Just seems to be stepped up a few notches though for colleges and fraternities.

[Ben E Lou]

Originally Posted by I. J. Reilly

And I bet ol’ Marvin Broadwater, Sr. was having a good chuckle reading this until he got to the end.

Oh, and also fwiw, I accepted the rumor as truth at the time I heard it because, well, let's just say it wasn't exactly the most shocking information I'd heard that day.

[Ben E Lou]

This character probably deserved his own dynasty thread. Not sure why I haven't used this thread to post his stuff. He's a former Tucker player (backup...not sure I've ever mentioned his name on here.) His status updates are regularly some of the most bizarre and misogynistic things I've ever seen.

From a few minutes ago:

These broads b smashing a nigga n his potnas n try to act like dont nobody know lol....Niggas gone play dumb fa dem cheeks baby!!!! Quit tryna b slicc n just unleash ya inner whore!!!!!

Earlier today:

All i want fa my birthday is a bitch that studders so wen i play wit da puss she sound like an ar15 wit da 100 round drum

Other recent gems:

"Might just throw a party...in dat pussy"

"Ion wanna white broad unless ha ass fat"
{I take it 'Ion' in this context means "I don't."}

"24 years old and im about to be father of two....i hope its a boy...cuz if its a girl...she goin up for adoption"

"Girl yo nipples look like scabs"

"its alot of lil niggas out here claimin to do big things....Livin life on these social sites LMAO...Take my advice kill ya self"

[albionmoonlight]

Originally Posted by Ben E Lou

"Might just throw a party...in dat pussy"

FOFC needs an updated motto. I'm just saying.

[sterlingice]

Originally Posted by albionmoonlight

FOFC needs an updated motto. I'm just saying.

What about Quote of th-- right, never mind

SI

[lighthousekeeper]

"Might just throw a party...in dat pussy"

I hope I can somehow figure out a way to use this in conversation at some point in my life.

[Ron Mexico]

Originally Posted by lighthousekeeper

I hope I can somehow figure out a way to use this in conversation at some point in my life.

Bonus points if it's a conversation with a girl who studders (sic).

[PilotMan]

From the files of "you have got to be fucking kidding me."---

Chemtrails being sprayed above my house! I wonder what kind of freaky diseases are going to sprout up around here

Since this came from someone who I had worked with I figured a little "tongue in cheek," but no, the comments proved legit.

I'm not so much worried about the blue sky. I'm worried about the chemicals that are being sprayed in the air. You can avoid pesticides in food by eating organic, but you can't breath different air! It's just sad

Uh, yes! Definitely!! You know ----, as bad as I want to have a child, I'm actually thankful to Almighty God that I don't have one. This world is so scary right now and it's just going to get worse according to the Bible.

[sabotai]

Ah, the "chemtrails" crowd. To be a part of that crowd requires a special extra dose of stupid above your average conspiracy theorist crowd.

[Suburban Rhythm]

Major endometriosis flare up has me feeling pretty icky right now...

[korme]

Tonight, I should just copy and paste my entire newsfeed. Good God, this election brings out the worst in people

[Ron Mexico]

Originally Posted by korme

Tonight, I should just copy and paste my entire newsfeed. Good God, this election brings out the worst in people

+1. I swear, this one was exceptionally bad. This lovely snippet was from a 47(?) year old investment banker that has been a friend of the family for several years.

"IGNORANCE WOW? It not MY fault and Im NOT ignorent youre just dumb take care Im done with you I really thought we agreed on a LOT but apparently I was wrong take care and good luck YES THATS HOW STRONGLY I FEEL ABOUT THIS sorry"

Yes, he's 47.