Moral Quandry

JPhillips · 07-27-2014, 09:13 PM

In yesterday's mail I received a clear notice from the parking violations of Los Angeles. The notice was addressed to the college aged son of the people who sold us the house last year. I have no way of contacting the son directly.

Should I contact the parents and thus sell out the son or should I recycle and let the chips fall where they may?

cuervo72 · 07-27-2014, 09:21 PM

I think you should ask Lathum.

Lathum · 07-27-2014, 09:26 PM

haha.

Yeah, I would contact the parents. All the scorn in the world is better than the potential future repercussions.

JonInMiddleGA · 07-27-2014, 09:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JPhillips

In yesterday's mail I received a clear notice from the parking violations of Los Angeles. The notice was addressed to the college aged son of the people who sold us the house last year. I have no way of contacting the son directly.

Should I contact the parents and thus sell out the son or should I recycle and let the chips fall where they may?

Cross out the address, mark it RTS-MLNA (Return To Sender - Moved Left No Address) and put it with the outbound mail

EagleFan · 07-27-2014, 09:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JonInMiddleGA

Cross out the address, mark it RTS-MLNA (Return To Sender - Moved Left No Address) and put it with the outbound mail

I guess you pick and choose the parts of the bible that you worry about... the whole idea of doing something good for fellow humans is lost on you...

Young Drachma · 07-27-2014, 09:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JonInMiddleGA

Cross out the address, mark it RTS-MLNA (Return To Sender - Moved Left No Address) and put it with the outbound mail

Yeah, this is my thought.

JonInMiddleGA · 07-27-2014, 09:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EagleFan

I guess you pick and choose the parts of the bible that you worry about... the whole idea of doing something good for fellow humans is lost on you...

You aren't serious ... right?

I was trying to give him a way out of the situation where he's doing no wrong to either party.

He doesn't want to rat out the kid (nor is he any moral obligation to do so, I'm assuming the addressee is an adult after all), he doesn't want to just trash the letter & do the kid any direct harm. My suggestion is as circumspect as anything anyone is going to come up with, short of launching a search for the kid's address which presumably he isn't inclined to do or else he would have done it already.

tarcone · 07-27-2014, 09:49 PM

Its a parking violation. What are those, $10-$15?
Call the parents. If they are that uptight, the kid should have plugged the meter.
If you have ever seen those parking meter shoes on TV, you know how painful it is to get your car back if it gets towed.

JonInMiddleGA · 07-27-2014, 09:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tarcone

Its a parking violation. What are those, $10-$15?

Doesn't that depend upon how many are mentioned in the envelope?

Also,

Quote:

The average ticket is $68.

per Parking Tickets : Department of Transportation : City of Los Angeles

tarcone · 07-27-2014, 10:08 PM

Wow, $68? Thats insane. Guess Im used to the University of Iowa parking tickets back in the late 80s.

BishopMVP · 07-27-2014, 10:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tarcone

Its a parking violation. What are those, $10-$15?
Call the parents. If they are that uptight, the kid should have plugged the meter.
If you have ever seen those parking meter shoes on TV, you know how painful it is to get your car back if it gets towed.

$10-$15? Oh, my naive midwestern friend

I don't see any harm in contacting the parents - it's a parking violation, not an arrest or some citation for underage drinking or getting in trouble at school. Those late fees (and possible booting/towing) is what really gets you, so I think it's more likely you're doing the kid a favor than selling him out.

Matthean · 07-27-2014, 10:42 PM

Parking tickets go up as you become later in paying them as well. It might not be bad to start, but if you let them sit, well, just don't.

EagleFan · 07-27-2014, 11:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JonInMiddleGA

You aren't serious ... right?

I was trying to give him a way out of the situation where he's doing no wrong to either party.

He doesn't want to rat out the kid (nor is he any moral obligation to do so, I'm assuming the addressee is an adult after all), he doesn't want to just trash the letter & do the kid any direct harm. My suggestion is as circumspect as anything anyone is going to come up with, short of launching a search for the kid's address which presumably he isn't inclined to do or else he would have done it already.

Your approach is no different than throwing it out. If he has their contact information why not send it to them? It beats the son having issues down the line.

sooner333 · 07-27-2014, 11:50 PM

Maybe remind parents to have son's mail forwarded to new house as that was overlooked.

DaddyTorgo · 07-28-2014, 12:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tarcone

Its a parking violation. What are those, $10-$15?
Call the parents. If they are that uptight, the kid should have plugged the meter.
If you have ever seen those parking meter shoes on TV, you know how painful it is to get your car back if it gets towed.

Seriously. "Ratting out" someone doesn't apply for something as insignificant as a parking violation.

DaddyTorgo · 07-28-2014, 12:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EagleFan

Your approach is no different than throwing it out. If he has their contact information why not send it to them? It beats the son having issues down the line.

Because Jon's an ass.

Vince, Pt. II · 07-28-2014, 12:16 AM

Is it just me, or is putting "return to sender" on mail that isn't addressed to you WAY different than simply throwing it out? And why in the hell is Jon an ass for suggesting this course of action? What the hell?

JonInMiddleGA · 07-28-2014, 12:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vince, Pt. II

Is it just me, or is putting "return to sender" on mail that isn't addressed to you WAY different than simply throwing it out? And why in the hell is Jon an ass for suggesting this course of action? What the hell?

It's cause it's me. There are a few people here who can't resist trolling me at any opportunity {shrug}

From the o.p. I got the impression (or at least a suspicion) that turning it over to the parents would likely cause issues between the driver & his parents. What I proposed was a middle ground solution.

Matthean · 07-28-2014, 12:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vince, Pt. II

And why in the hell is Jon an ass for suggesting this course of action? What the hell?

Because he didn't give a nicer response.

JonInMiddleGA · 07-28-2014, 12:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaddyTorgo

Because Jon's an ass.

Thanks. Nice to see that the occasional bursts of civility don't keep you from joining the troll. 'preciate that.

JonInMiddleGA · 07-28-2014, 12:24 AM

I thought I was paranoid but damn, never seen this much OMGthehorror over a parking ticket.

If the city wants the guy, they'll find him but from the reactions in this thread you'd think a Boston-style manhunt was going to take place or something.

Logan · 07-28-2014, 08:13 AM

If you have the parents contact information, why not just throw the envelope you received into another envelope addressed to the son? That way he opens it on his own and the parents can't see anything, if that's what you're worried about.

Kodos · 07-28-2014, 08:56 AM

I can't see how Jon was being an ass there.

nol · 07-28-2014, 09:14 AM

Los Angeles is going after that parking ticket money come hell or high water, so you might as well get him the tickets ASAP so he doesn't have to deal with late fees, or even worse, tryong to appeal late fees because the tickets weren't sent to him in time.

Jon's solution is a nice idea to make the parking people have to hunt for his new address if they want the money that badly, but they're too dense/greedy to adjust the date accordingly once they do find his address, which would make the tickets past due by the time he first receives them.

flere-imsaho · 07-28-2014, 09:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JonInMiddleGA

Cross out the address, mark it RTS-MLNA (Return To Sender - Moved Left No Address) and put it with the outbound mail

I'm glad you posted this. I've always used "Not Known At This Address" for mail addressed to the former owner, but yours sounds more official.

IMO, Jon's solution is probably best. When I worked in fundraising getting something back like this was good as it tripped a flag in our system to go research an update, resulting in less waste all around. I'd assume (OK, maybe naively) there'd be something similar for municipal revenue departments.

JPhillips · 07-28-2014, 09:27 AM

A possible mitigating factor is that the father is a recently retired police chief.

I can't tell you how happy I am with alll the parody threads.

Chief Rum · 07-28-2014, 11:10 AM

FWIW, parking tickets attach to the car and become due and payable with registration in California.

JonInMiddleGA · 07-28-2014, 11:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chief Rum

FWIW, parking tickets attach to the car and become due and payable with registration in California.

Srsly? Isn't that, umm, kind of odd? I mean, doesn't that punish the next owner for something they had no control over?

digamma · 07-28-2014, 11:32 AM

Not really. If you have proof of title or sale that is after the date of the ticket, then you are in the clear.

JonInMiddleGA · 07-28-2014, 11:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by digamma

Not really. If you have proof of title or sale that is after the date of the ticket, then you are in the clear.

Ah.

{insert FB thumbs up here}

timmae · 07-28-2014, 01:33 PM

I wouldn't think twice about putting a note on the mail that the person "moved and is no longer at this address". I just moved into a single family house rental and the previous tenant didn't leave an address. No other option in my mind.

Now if the couple told you to forward any mail to their new address the son's mail, since it utilized their address (and btw is probably a sneaky way of not having to get a new license with a new address or state but I digress), would fit into that category. Either way you are doing the right thing in mind.

BishopMVP · 07-28-2014, 02:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by timmae

Now if the couple told you to forward any mail to their new address the son's mail, since it utilized their address (and btw is probably a sneaky way of not having to get a new license with a new address or state but I digress),

It's a college kid... I'm guessing it's much more likely to be an issue of laziness or not wanting to deal with the DMV than some well thought out plan.

kcchief19 · 07-28-2014, 08:18 PM

I'm with JIMGA on this one. If you want to go to the trouble of hunting down the kid, go for it. But I'm a privacy guy -- I don't see any reason to send mail to the parents just because he knows him. It's best to treat it just like a stranger -- and by all accounts the kid is a stranger.

I'm not big on shifting moralities. Would it be OK to send this to the parents if it were confidential medical test results? A check? Where's the line?

Marking it no longer at this address and return to sender is as ethical as it gets. I don't see the issue.

07-27-2014, 09:21 PM	#2
cuervo72 Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Maryland	I think you should ask Lathum. __________________ null

07-27-2014, 09:49 PM	#8
tarcone Coordinator Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Pacific	Its a parking violation. What are those, $10-$15? Call the parents. If they are that uptight, the kid should have plugged the meter. If you have ever seen those parking meter shoes on TV, you know how painful it is to get your car back if it gets towed. __________________ Excuses are for wusses- Spencer Lee Punting is Winning- Tory Taylor The word is Fight! Fight! Fight! For Iowa FOFC 30 Dollar Challenge Champion-OOTP '15

07-27-2014, 10:08 PM	#10
tarcone Coordinator Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Pacific	Wow, $68? Thats insane. Guess Im used to the University of Iowa parking tickets back in the late 80s. __________________ Excuses are for wusses- Spencer Lee Punting is Winning- Tory Taylor The word is Fight! Fight! Fight! For Iowa FOFC 30 Dollar Challenge Champion-OOTP '15

07-27-2014, 10:42 PM	#12
Matthean Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Aug 2008	Parking tickets go up as you become later in paying them as well. It might not be bad to start, but if you let them sit, well, just don't. __________________ Board games: Bringing people back to the original social network, the table.

07-28-2014, 12:24 AM	#21
JonInMiddleGA Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Behind Enemy Lines in Athens, GA	I thought I was paranoid but damn, never seen this much OMGthehorror over a parking ticket. If the city wants the guy, they'll find him but from the reactions in this thread you'd think a Boston-style manhunt was going to take place or something. __________________ "I lit another cigarette. Unless I specifically inform you to the contrary, I am always lighting another cigarette." - from a novel by Martin Amis

07-27-2014, 09:26 PM	#3
Lathum Favored Bitch #1 Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: homeless in NJ	haha. Yeah, I would contact the parents. All the scorn in the world is better than the potential future repercussions.

07-27-2014, 11:50 PM	#14
sooner333 College Starter Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Norman, OK	Maybe remind parents to have son's mail forwarded to new house as that was overlooked.

07-28-2014, 12:16 AM	#17
Vince, Pt. II Pro Starter Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Somewhere More Familiar	Is it just me, or is putting "return to sender" on mail that isn't addressed to you WAY different than simply throwing it out? And why in the hell is Jon an ass for suggesting this course of action? What the hell?

07-28-2014, 08:13 AM	#22
Logan Head Coach Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: NYC	If you have the parents contact information, why not just throw the envelope you received into another envelope addressed to the son? That way he opens it on his own and the parents can't see anything, if that's what you're worried about.

07-28-2014, 08:56 AM	#23
Kodos Resident Alien Join Date: Jun 2001	I can't see how Jon was being an ass there. __________________ Author of The Bill Gates Challenge, as well as other groundbreaking dynasties.

07-28-2014, 09:14 AM	#24
nol Banned Join Date: Oct 2003	Los Angeles is going after that parking ticket money come hell or high water, so you might as well get him the tickets ASAP so he doesn't have to deal with late fees, or even worse, tryong to appeal late fees because the tickets weren't sent to him in time. Jon's solution is a nice idea to make the parking people have to hunt for his new address if they want the money that badly, but they're too dense/greedy to adjust the date accordingly once they do find his address, which would make the tickets past due by the time he first receives them.

07-28-2014, 09:27 AM	#26
JPhillips Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Newburgh, NY	A possible mitigating factor is that the father is a recently retired police chief. I can't tell you how happy I am with alll the parody threads. __________________ To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.. - Mr. Rogers

07-28-2014, 11:10 AM	#27
Chief Rum Hall Of Famer Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Where Hip Hop lives	FWIW, parking tickets attach to the car and become due and payable with registration in California. __________________ . . I would rather be wrong...Than live in the shadows of your song...My mind is open wide...And now I'm ready to start...You're not sure...You open the door...And step out into the dark...Now I'm ready.

07-28-2014, 11:32 AM	#29
digamma Torchbearer Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: On Lake Harriet	Not really. If you have proof of title or sale that is after the date of the ticket, then you are in the clear.

07-28-2014, 01:33 PM	#31
timmae College Starter Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Chicago	I wouldn't think twice about putting a note on the mail that the person "moved and is no longer at this address". I just moved into a single family house rental and the previous tenant didn't leave an address. No other option in my mind. Now if the couple told you to forward any mail to their new address the son's mail, since it utilized their address (and btw is probably a sneaky way of not having to get a new license with a new address or state but I digress), would fit into that category. Either way you are doing the right thing in mind. __________________ Interactive OOTP 15 Dynasty (Single Season) CHAMPION!! Oh yeah... Happy New York Day everyone!

07-28-2014, 08:18 PM	#33
kcchief19 Pro Starter Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Kansas City, MO	I'm with JIMGA on this one. If you want to go to the trouble of hunting down the kid, go for it. But I'm a privacy guy -- I don't see any reason to send mail to the parents just because he knows him. It's best to treat it just like a stranger -- and by all accounts the kid is a stranger. I'm not big on shifting moralities. Would it be OK to send this to the parents if it were confidential medical test results? A check? Where's the line? Marking it no longer at this address and return to sender is as ethical as it gets. I don't see the issue.

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)