Michael Vick has ties to Al-Qaeda

flounder · 08-15-2007, 11:56 AM

I believe this story to be absolutely 100% true.

Quote:

Embattled NFL quarterback Michael Vick, facing federal charges related to his alleged participation in dogfighting, has been hit with a "$63,000,000,000 billion dollar" lawsuit filed by a South Carolina inmate who alleges the Atlanta Falcons star stole his pit bulls and sold them on eBay to buy "missiles from Iran," FOX News has learned.

Jonathan Lee Riches filed the handwritten complaint over "theft and abuse of my animals" on July 23 in the U.S. District Court in Richmond, Va.

Riches alleges that Vick stole two white mixed pit bull dogs from his home in Holiday, Fla., and used them for dogfighting operations in Richmond, Va. The complaint goes on to allege that Vick sold the dogs on eBay and “used the proceeds to purchase missiles from the Iran government.”

The complaint also alleges that Vick would need those missiles because he pledged allegiance to Al Qaeda in February of this year.

“Michael Vick has to stop physically hurting my feelings and dashing my hopes,” Riches writes in the complaint.

Riches wants $63 billion dollars “backed by gold and silver “ delivered to the front gates to the Williamsburg Federal Correctional facility in South Carolina. Riches is an inmate at the facility serving out a wire fraud conviction.

FOXNews.com attempted to contact Vick, but neither he nor his spokesman could be reached for comment.

dj_morton · 08-15-2007, 11:58 AM

cartman · 08-15-2007, 12:00 PM

wow, Vick would have been better off if he opened a dry cleaners and simply lost a pair of pants.

Mustang · 08-15-2007, 12:03 PM

Wouldn't 63,000,000,000 Billion Dollars actually be $63,000,000,000,000,000,000???

Capital · 08-15-2007, 12:04 PM

this story is ridiculous...What would two pit bulls on ebay buy - sliver of a spec on a missile

Bashing Vick is one thing, which I have done, but this kind of thing makes me dislike our legal system.

Mustang · 08-15-2007, 12:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Capital

Bashing Vick is one thing, which I have done, but this kind of thing makes me dislike our legal system.

At least every dog has its day in court.

rkmsuf · 08-15-2007, 12:08 PM

Dr. Evil approves of the suggested amount.

molson · 08-15-2007, 12:15 PM

I think this is the result of the "legal libraries" prisons have. Prisoners have access to fill-in-the blank legal forms and the prisons will route them to be filed, no lawyer required.

MikeVic · 08-15-2007, 12:16 PM

That's dumb. They're criminals. They should be locked away with no privileges.

molson · 08-15-2007, 12:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MikeVic

That's dumb. They're criminals. They should be locked away with no privileges.

I think there's a Supreme Court case that requires access to the courts.

Of course, they should be some kind of screening process.

Critch · 08-15-2007, 12:19 PM

Imagine if they made missiles that were packed with pitbulls.

BrianD · 08-15-2007, 12:21 PM

It is very sad that this even made its way to a new outlet. Do they really think there is a story here? Even for Fox news this is pretty crappy.

cartman · 08-15-2007, 12:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Critch

Imagine if they made missiles that were packed with pitbulls.

And the pitbulls had bees in their mouths, so that when they barked, bees would fly out.

Surtt · 08-15-2007, 12:24 PM

I was expecting this to be a story from The Onion

MikeVic · 08-15-2007, 12:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cartman

And the pitbulls had bees in their mouths, so that when they barked, bees would fly out.

What about a Richard Simmons robot.

Ben E Lou · 08-15-2007, 12:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BrianD

It is very sad that this even made its way to a new outlet. Do they really think there is a story here? Even for Fox news this is pretty crappy.

This was reported at AJC.com weeks ago.
http://www.ajc.com/sports/content/sp...rite_0727.html

And Sportsdigs had it first.

Mustang · 08-15-2007, 12:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MikeVic

What about a Richard Simmons robot.

Those have issues with their asses blowin'

timmynausea · 08-15-2007, 01:04 PM

My criminology professor had been an assistant warden at a maximum security prison for years, and he told us a bunch of funny stories about the stupid lawsuits that prisoners file.

One guy tried to sue the prison because the microwaves they use in the kitchen send waves around the building that caused him to get erections. These erections, in turn, would pull the purposely too-short blankets up off of his feet. The exposed feet would cause him to catch colds and grow ill. And the prison was, of course, doing all of this on purpose.

Desmond · 08-15-2007, 01:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Surtt

I was expecting this to be a story from The Onion

The Onion, Fox News, same thing.

Yossarian · 08-15-2007, 01:56 PM

Hey, if you were stuck in prison with sweet FA to do, wouldn't you relish the opportunity to do ANYTHING different?

Surtt · 08-15-2007, 02:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desmond

The Onion, Fox News, same thing.

Come on now,
The Onion has more believable stories.

King of New York · 08-15-2007, 02:07 PM

Michael Vick is incapable of hitting a target with a thrown football, how's he going to hit anything with a missile?

flere-imsaho · 08-15-2007, 02:26 PM

It's a smart missle. He doesn't actually have to aim.

larrymcg421 · 08-15-2007, 02:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by King of New York

Michael Vick is incapable of hitting a target with a thrown football, how's he going to hit anything with a missile?

He hits his opponents fairly well. That will come in handy when firing missiles.

BYU 14 · 08-15-2007, 11:23 PM

How much you wanna bet Michael Vick could throw a Pitbull over them Mountains!!

EagleFan · 08-16-2007, 12:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BrianD

It is very sad that this even made its way to a new outlet. Do they really think there is a story here? Even for Fox news this is pretty crappy.

It's not like it was "front page". Any media outlet is full of these kind of filler stories. You may want to cover up a bit, your bias is showing.

EagleFan · 08-16-2007, 12:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by larrymcg421

He hits his opponents fairly well. That will come in handy when firing missiles.

Not really because he isn't aiming for the opponents.

MikeVic · 08-16-2007, 09:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BYU 14

How much you wanna bet Michael Vick could throw a Pitbull over them Mountains!!

He used to be able to throw a pitbull a quarter mile!

nilodor · 08-16-2007, 10:01 AM

I actually think he would get less play on CNN if he really did have ties to AlQeada, because it appears to be strictly against policy to report real news anymore.

flounder · 08-16-2007, 11:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nilodor

I actually think he would get less play on CNN if he really did have ties to AlQeada, because it appears to be strictly against policy to report real news anymore.

I beg to differ.

nilodor · 08-16-2007, 01:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by flounder

I beg to differ.

I stand corrected.

Warhammer · 08-16-2007, 01:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by flere-imsaho

It's a smart missle. He doesn't actually have to aim.

It might be a smart missile, but he is going to dumbfire it.

MrDNA · 08-16-2007, 07:17 PM

If you're bored, google this guy's name. Well, maybe don't "google" it, as "google.com" is the defendant in one of his suits. As is Lambeau field, Larry King Live, Adolf Hitler's National Socialist Party and the Lincoln Memorial. Can't say I wouldn't do the same if I were in prison.

SnDvls · 08-17-2007, 03:14 PM

now this guy is trying to get money from Bud Selig, Barry Bonds and Hank Aaron's bat...yes from a bat.

hxxp://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2007/0816071riches1.html

Desmond · 08-17-2007, 04:09 PM

Not odd, I have a suit pending against Sasha Cohens underwear for causing me to miss time at work.

08-15-2007, 11:58 AM	#2
dj_morton H.S. Freshman Team Join Date: Jan 2007	hmm

08-15-2007, 12:00 PM	#3
cartman Death Herald Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Le stelle la notte sono grandi e luminose nel cuore profondo del Texas	wow, Vick would have been better off if he opened a dry cleaners and simply lost a pair of pants. __________________ Thinkin' of a master plan 'Cuz ain't nuthin' but sweat inside my hand So I dig into my pocket, all my money is spent So I dig deeper but still comin' up with lint

08-15-2007, 12:03 PM	#4
Mustang Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Wisconsin	Wouldn't 63,000,000,000 Billion Dollars actually be $63,000,000,000,000,000,000??? __________________ You, you will regret what you have done this day. I will make you regret ever being born. Your going to wish you never left your mothers womb, where it was warm and safe... and wet. i am going to show you pain you never knew existed, you are going to see a whole new spectrum of pain, like a Rainboooow. But! This rainbow is not just like any other rainbow, its...

08-15-2007, 12:08 PM	#7
rkmsuf Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2001	Dr. Evil approves of the suggested amount. __________________ "Don't you have homes?" -- Judge Smales

08-15-2007, 12:24 PM	#14
Surtt College Benchwarmer Join Date: Nov 2003	I was expecting this to be a story from The Onion __________________ “The greatest dangers to liberty lurk in insidious encroachment by men of zeal, well-meaning but without understanding.” United States Supreme Court Justice Louis D. Brandeis

08-15-2007, 12:04 PM	#5
Capital High School Varsity Join Date: Oct 2000	this story is ridiculous...What would two pit bulls on ebay buy - sliver of a spec on a missile Bashing Vick is one thing, which I have done, but this kind of thing makes me dislike our legal system.

08-15-2007, 12:15 PM	#8
molson General Manager Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: The Mountains	I think this is the result of the "legal libraries" prisons have. Prisoners have access to fill-in-the blank legal forms and the prisons will route them to be filed, no lawyer required.

08-15-2007, 12:16 PM	#9
MikeVic Head Coach Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Hometown of Canada	That's dumb. They're criminals. They should be locked away with no privileges.

08-15-2007, 12:19 PM	#11
Critch lolzcat Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Herndon, VA	Imagine if they made missiles that were packed with pitbulls.

08-15-2007, 12:21 PM	#12
BrianD Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Appleton, WI	It is very sad that this even made its way to a new outlet. Do they really think there is a story here? Even for Fox news this is pretty crappy.

08-15-2007, 01:04 PM	#18
timmynausea College Starter Join Date: Dec 2002	My criminology professor had been an assistant warden at a maximum security prison for years, and he told us a bunch of funny stories about the stupid lawsuits that prisoners file. One guy tried to sue the prison because the microwaves they use in the kitchen send waves around the building that caused him to get erections. These erections, in turn, would pull the purposely too-short blankets up off of his feet. The exposed feet would cause him to catch colds and grow ill. And the prison was, of course, doing all of this on purpose.

08-15-2007, 01:56 PM	#20
Yossarian High School Varsity Join Date: Jul 2003	Hey, if you were stuck in prison with sweet FA to do, wouldn't you relish the opportunity to do ANYTHING different?

08-15-2007, 02:07 PM	#22
King of New York High School Varsity Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Edge of the Great Dismal Swamp	Michael Vick is incapable of hitting a target with a thrown football, how's he going to hit anything with a missile? __________________ Input A No Input

08-15-2007, 02:26 PM	#23
flere-imsaho Coordinator Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Chicagoland	It's a smart missle. He doesn't actually have to aim.

08-15-2007, 11:23 PM	#25
BYU 14 Coordinator Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: The scorched Desert	How much you wanna bet Michael Vick could throw a Pitbull over them Mountains!! Last edited by BYU 14 : 08-15-2007 at 11:26 PM.

08-16-2007, 10:01 AM	#29
nilodor College Benchwarmer Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: calgary, AB	I actually think he would get less play on CNN if he really did have ties to AlQeada, because it appears to be strictly against policy to report real news anymore.

08-16-2007, 07:17 PM	#33
MrDNA High School Varsity Join Date: Jan 2007	If you're bored, google this guy's name. Well, maybe don't "google" it, as "google.com" is the defendant in one of his suits. As is Lambeau field, Larry King Live, Adolf Hitler's National Socialist Party and the Lincoln Memorial. Can't say I wouldn't do the same if I were in prison. __________________ Norfolk Flame (Shiba) Jacksonville Bulls (UFL) R.I.P. *Ayr Bravehearts (FOFL)*

08-17-2007, 03:14 PM	#34
SnDvls Pro Starter Join Date: Jul 2001	now this guy is trying to get money from Bud Selig, Barry Bonds and Hank Aaron's bat...yes from a bat. hxxp://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2007/0816071riches1.html

08-17-2007, 04:09 PM	#35
Desmond Banned Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: The Hatch	Not odd, I have a suit pending against Sasha Cohens underwear for causing me to miss time at work.

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)