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I tend not to agree with "I rarely agree with..." posts, but I don't agree with either in this case. This is her workplace, too. It sounds like you've done everything but stand on your head to indicate interest, and Corinna's been pushing this as well. I'd leave her alone, imagining that there's a similar "how to (successfully) deflect a co-worker's interest" item on another board somewhere. Unless it's normal for you to give people birthday cards and gifts, I don't think that was a good idea.
The meetups sound much more promising. I doubt someone who took a daughter along, though, is looking to date. That just doesn't parse. The ones who like you will find a way to give you the opportunity to ask them out. And take that opportunity. There's no "play it cool for three meetups before asking" rule. Women signal interest by making it easy to talk to them, then men have to take that initiative. I think it's harder for the women, especially once you're alert to the signs and recognize what they're doing.
And yes, kayaking, for whatever reason, is a female activity. Women know this and I think they're not ideal for finding dates because women who are looking don't want to stand out. We had a lot of varied events in our group - most really weren't for date-seeking, but the ones that tended to draw new people, people who seemed to be looking, were the ones like dinners and wine-tastings and lighter activities where conversation is less interrupted.
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