|
Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
2005 Season and beyond
In 2005, apparently Notre Dame only won one game. They beat Cenral Florida in the second to last game of the year to finish the year at 1-10, ranked #120 in the nation. I learn of this from Candy, who came by with her husband, Brock Gray, to visit me in Terry Haute after the season ended. The news cheers me up, but two years away from it all, I find not nearly as much joy as I had hoped. It’s not the same anymore; it’s not my team.
In 2006, Notre Dame finishes 1-10 again, ranked #119. It is satisfying to know that our short tenure has ruined the school’s football program for a few years anyway, but this is all just bittersweet revenge. I wanted to be a part of it, be on the sideline watching the empty stands. Hell, I don’t even recognize the kids' names anymore.
In 2007, Notre Dame begins the long climb back up the ranks. They finish 6-6, ranked #68. Bottom line is their prestige just didn’t take a big enough hit to keep them on the bottom. Once they cycled out our guys, they started to win again. I am sure they will be back near the top within another decade.
At this point I stop following college football; I continue to drink and waste away my life visiting internet porn sites. I’m still officially the coach of Terry Haute, but my assistants handle everything. I don’t even know what our record was this past season. Sometimes I get email, asking if I will take another job somewhere. Get revenge on some other institution. What’s the use, I say, and pour myself another glass of whiskey.
Just before the end of the decade, Candy and Brock came to visit me in Terry Haute with their son, Knute. Know what the little tyke was wearing? Yup, you guessed it. A Notre Dame sweatshirt. About an hour after they left, I had written my last words, had my last drink. In my left hand was a loaded pistol. What’s the use, I thought? Just get it over with.
Sometimes you just have to hit bottom before things change, I guess. And maybe on that day I bounced off the bottom, and it gave me just a little bit of perspective to see over that whiskey glass, that loaded pistol, that small apartment in the middle of nowhere. Maybe I simply realized for the first time that I had lost a battle, and not a war. That by blowing my brains out in that meaningless apartment on that day I would be admitting defeat to myself and all the good that is in the world. Hell, maybe even god reached down and touched me, telling me that now was not my time. Well, whatever the reason, I didn’t do it. For the first time in seven years, I felt just a little spark, a faint glimmer of a simmering rage, deep down where all things big and important lie. I put the gun away. Emptied the whiskey onto the floor. Took a shower for the first time in weeks. I called the athletic director at Terry Haute and told him I quit, thanks for everything. I got dressed and went across the street to the local diner. Ordered myself my first healthy meal in years, and grabbed a newspaper off the rack. Turned to the employment section. And yes, I started to look for a new job. There was work to do. Notre Dame may have gotten us, but we did a pretty good number on them too. I am not finished yet. I will continue to fight the fight! Don’t know where. Don’t know how. Don’t know what game. Don’t know what team. But, dammit, someday I will return. They have not seen the last of Godzilla Blitz…
|