Front Office Football Central - View Single Post - Godzilla Blitz's "Poop on the Golden Helmets (Year 3)"

Co-D'ohs · 02-28-2003, 06:41 PM

Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:

Week 15
Whoa! Somehow I missed an important event last week. Our starting QB, Everett Barnes, got rung up in the game last week. He’s got a dislocated shoulder, and will be out until the snow melts. That means that our hero from last week’s game, freshman QB Ron Brady, will get the start against #11 Penn State! Oh joy! Ron is one of our recruits from last year, and this guy is bad, let me tell you! I’ll spare you all the details, but this should say it well enough: in his all important passing categories, his highest red bar is a three for medium passes. All the rest are zeros.

Pregame
With QB Barnes out, the question floating around campus is whether we have a chance to break our all-time defeat record of 76-3 set earlier this year against Michigan. Penn State is slightly ahead of Michigan in the ratings, so that looks good. We have a lot more players hurt now, so that helps too. Plus, our 10% practice, 10% football study, and %10 weight lifting have got to have helped keep our development down this season. The Michigan game was quite a performance, but it is not a ridiculous thought to think that we could come close to that today. And wouldn’t it be something to break 100? Is that possible? The Michigan game was 59-0 at the half, so I would have to think that it could happen if we really wish it to be. Oh, goals in life add so much flavor.

The Result
Penn State 49, Notre Dame 12. A solid loss to be sure, but nowhere near the gargantuan defeat we had hoped for. Penn State ran the ball too often to generate megapoints, and they also had quite a few turnovers, penalties, and missed field goals. For our part, we must have had something in our Gatorade, because our defense and running game had inspired days. It was our passing game that saved the day for us though. Mr. Brady (3 for 35, 14 yards, 0 TD’s, 0 ints) had a day for the ages! Yes, you read that right! He completed 3 of 35 passes! Boy, do we love this guy! This of course leads us to the game ball award. We would love to give it to Brady, but he got his last week. However, we don’t have to search long. The other end of our passing game presents us with an even more hilarious and admirable performance: WR Joey Murray. Joey is a darkside receiver with lots of talent, but today he took a big step forward in committing to the forces of light. Replacing an injured WR Linville early in the first quarter, Murray was Brady’s target of choice 26 times today. That’s right, 26 of Brady’s 35 passes were aimed at Murray. And how many did Murray catch, you ask? I’ll tell you, but sit down first, ok? Two, I answer, before rolling on the floor in laughter! Yes, two. For a total of 7 yards! How’s that for Notre Dame passing? He managed to drop one, but otherwise, poor Joey had no clue out there in front of the 80,000 faithful that showed up today. For your All-Suck performance today, we gladly place in front of you, as you surely could not catch it, the Aubie Game Ball. Simply outstanding!

And just how far did our rank fall with this defeat? Did we cross #100…

Record 3-8; Rank #94

No! So close!

Well, that wraps up the regular season. I wonder if we will go to a bowl game? Ha ha ha ha ha! We are too funny.

02-28-2003, 06:41 PM	#56
Co-D'ohs H.S. Freshman Team Join Date: Jan 2003	Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz: Week 15 Whoa! Somehow I missed an important event last week. Our starting QB, Everett Barnes, got rung up in the game last week. He’s got a dislocated shoulder, and will be out until the snow melts. That means that our hero from last week’s game, freshman QB Ron Brady, will get the start against #11 Penn State! Oh joy! Ron is one of our recruits from last year, and this guy is bad, let me tell you! I’ll spare you all the details, but this should say it well enough: in his all important passing categories, his highest red bar is a three for medium passes. All the rest are zeros. Pregame With QB Barnes out, the question floating around campus is whether we have a chance to break our all-time defeat record of 76-3 set earlier this year against Michigan. Penn State is slightly ahead of Michigan in the ratings, so that looks good. We have a lot more players hurt now, so that helps too. Plus, our 10% practice, 10% football study, and %10 weight lifting have got to have helped keep our development down this season. The Michigan game was quite a performance, but it is not a ridiculous thought to think that we could come close to that today. And wouldn’t it be something to break 100? Is that possible? The Michigan game was 59-0 at the half, so I would have to think that it could happen if we really wish it to be. Oh, goals in life add so much flavor. The Result Penn State 49, Notre Dame 12. A solid loss to be sure, but nowhere near the gargantuan defeat we had hoped for. Penn State ran the ball too often to generate megapoints, and they also had quite a few turnovers, penalties, and missed field goals. For our part, we must have had something in our Gatorade, because our defense and running game had inspired days. It was our passing game that saved the day for us though. Mr. Brady (3 for 35, 14 yards, 0 TD’s, 0 ints) had a day for the ages! Yes, you read that right! He completed 3 of 35 passes! Boy, do we love this guy! This of course leads us to the game ball award. We would love to give it to Brady, but he got his last week. However, we don’t have to search long. The other end of our passing game presents us with an even more hilarious and admirable performance: WR Joey Murray. Joey is a darkside receiver with lots of talent, but today he took a big step forward in committing to the forces of light. Replacing an injured WR Linville early in the first quarter, Murray was Brady’s target of choice 26 times today. That’s right, 26 of Brady’s 35 passes were aimed at Murray. And how many did Murray catch, you ask? I’ll tell you, but sit down first, ok? Two, I answer, before rolling on the floor in laughter! Yes, two. For a total of 7 yards! How’s that for Notre Dame passing? He managed to drop one, but otherwise, poor Joey had no clue out there in front of the 80,000 faithful that showed up today. For your All-Suck performance today, we gladly place in front of you, as you surely could not catch it, the Aubie Game Ball. Simply outstanding! And just how far did our rank fall with this defeat? Did we cross #100… Record 3-8; Rank #94 No! So close! Well, that wraps up the regular season. I wonder if we will go to a bowl game? Ha ha ha ha ha! We are too funny.