Front Office Football Central - View Single Post - Godzilla Blitz's "Poop on the Golden Helmets Challenge (A TCY Dynasty?)"

Co-D'ohs · 02-18-2003, 07:00 PM

Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:

Week 2
Recruiting
Frustration, incorporated! The five idolaters (that sure must be spelled wrong!) all decide to visit, and I immediately offer bribes to all five. If I can get sanctioned I should be able to take us out of the bowl picture next year. But no luck here! All five of these kids politely accept my offers of cars, drugs, and women! Not an honest one in the bunch. Oh, that’s right, I keep forgetting. These kids were the ones that idolize Notre Dame. Of course they’ll take the bribes. Who said this isn’t a sim of the real NCAA? Where’s that brickhead Hussey from California? He must be honest. Come visit son, will you, so I can offer you a new PS2 and you can rat on me.

We continue tossing out scholarship offers to our top recruits. We’ve now got 16 offers out there, but check this out. Three of the six perfect zero-rated guys didn’t think it was likely that they would accept our offers! This is too funny. I pester these guys with continued phone calls. Of my 16 scholarship offers on the table, I really want these rare perfect zeros.

At this point, I think I will take on the added challenge of finding the dumbest hs player in the country and bringing him to Notre Dame. I’ll call this my “Rudy” challenge. If I spend endless extra time with him, can I get him to graduate? That would be a major victory for our GPA. Should take it down a nice chunk. And just where will that dumbest student be? For those of you out there watching at home, could this guy be from your own high school? The search begins…

And the winner is…

Kyle Stinson, an OT from Sunnydale HS in Phoenix, Arizona! Kyle has a robust 1.80 GPA and a stellar 571 SAT. But wait! He is rated 51 out of 100 by my scout. This clearly disqualifies him. So we’ll go to our runner up. That would be RB Brock Gray out of Weber HS in Ogden, UT. Gray’s SAT scores were identical to those of Stinson, but Gray’s 1.84 GPA was no competition for Stinson’s. However, Gray is only rated a 14 out of 100, which obviously makes him the better choice. Red rover, red rover, come on over! We better go visit this guy in person; clearly this guy would find talking on the phone too challenging. Oh, good. He’s worse than I expected. This is turning out perfectly.

Enough of these silly sidetracks. On to the game…

Game
Whoops. Not till next week. Silly me. Hope I confused my players too.

02-18-2003, 07:00 PM	#8
Co-D'ohs H.S. Freshman Team Join Date: Jan 2003	Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz: Week 2 Recruiting Frustration, incorporated! The five idolaters (that sure must be spelled wrong!) all decide to visit, and I immediately offer bribes to all five. If I can get sanctioned I should be able to take us out of the bowl picture next year. But no luck here! All five of these kids politely accept my offers of cars, drugs, and women! Not an honest one in the bunch. Oh, that’s right, I keep forgetting. These kids were the ones that idolize Notre Dame. Of course they’ll take the bribes. Who said this isn’t a sim of the real NCAA? Where’s that brickhead Hussey from California? He must be honest. Come visit son, will you, so I can offer you a new PS2 and you can rat on me. We continue tossing out scholarship offers to our top recruits. We’ve now got 16 offers out there, but check this out. Three of the six perfect zero-rated guys didn’t think it was likely that they would accept our offers! This is too funny. I pester these guys with continued phone calls. Of my 16 scholarship offers on the table, I really want these rare perfect zeros. At this point, I think I will take on the added challenge of finding the dumbest hs player in the country and bringing him to Notre Dame. I’ll call this my “Rudy” challenge. If I spend endless extra time with him, can I get him to graduate? That would be a major victory for our GPA. Should take it down a nice chunk. And just where will that dumbest student be? For those of you out there watching at home, could this guy be from your own high school? The search begins… And the winner is… Kyle Stinson, an OT from Sunnydale HS in Phoenix, Arizona! Kyle has a robust 1.80 GPA and a stellar 571 SAT. But wait! He is rated 51 out of 100 by my scout. This clearly disqualifies him. So we’ll go to our runner up. That would be RB Brock Gray out of Weber HS in Ogden, UT. Gray’s SAT scores were identical to those of Stinson, but Gray’s 1.84 GPA was no competition for Stinson’s. However, Gray is only rated a 14 out of 100, which obviously makes him the better choice. Red rover, red rover, come on over! We better go visit this guy in person; clearly this guy would find talking on the phone too challenging. Oh, good. He’s worse than I expected. This is turning out perfectly. Enough of these silly sidetracks. On to the game… Game Whoops. Not till next week. Silly me. Hope I confused my players too.