Quote:
Originally Posted by Edward64
I think majority of US kids leave after finding a job because they want to be independent, have their own place, spend however they want to spend their earnings, not have parents crimp their dating life etc.
I think parents wouldn't mind working kids staying with them for X years. But at a certain point, it's time to go (25-29). If my kids wanted to stay past 30+, I'd be concerned they aren't willing to be independent or responsible.
The perfect scenario for me is working kids out of the house, but living within 30 min to 2 hours away. Easy enough to visit on weekends.
I know in many other places in the world, kids would want to stay with parents until they get ready to start their own family. In Asia, there is a stronger family unit, a combination of love, guilt and duty.
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I agree that the majority of US kids will be leaving home and yes most of the people I am talking about are 1st generation Americans though not all. The adult kids I am seeing live pretty independent lives, contribute to the household financially and otherwise, and are not lacking in their dating life as far as how much they actually want to date. Of those I have seen, I would put them in three categories.
The adults who are saving for a down payment for their first home and would rather give their parents a chunk of change every month while they save instead of paying $1,800+ in rent for a one bedroom apartment to someone else or have to deal with roommates all while paying other bills.
The next group are adults who are helping their parents out or are getting help from their parents. Some are taking care of older parents with health issues and it makes financial sense for them to stay home as opposed to having their own place while shuttling back and forth to their parents. Others basically have one parent or both parents living with them in that parent's house as opposed to moving the parent(s) into a house with the child's name on the mortgage or rental agreement. On the other hand, there are also the adult children with kids of their own who live with their parents who are helping with childcare duties. To be fair, this group has usually gone out on their own but are back home. However, I am still talking mostly about people under 30 years old.
The last group are adult children who are basically roommates with their parents. They share expenses and responsibilities in the household. The children come and go as they please. The parents come and go as they please. The kids are not throwing parties to the dismay of the parents and the parents aren't throwing wild parties to the dismay of the kid. The child is probably not bringing home that person they picked up at the club to their parents' home for a nightcap but also the parents are not surprised if the long time girlfriend/boyfriend of their kid is at the breakfast table on a Saturday or Sunday morning. The kid could find and afford their own place but are not overly fussed to do so. Their parents are not overly fussed about them still being at home either.