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On the day to day of things I've been doing pretty well. I'm definitely an introvert, already worked at home, almost my entire circle of friends is online, so this isn't really a dramatic shift for me like it is for many. Because I was concerned about where this was going very early on, I was able to make a few small orders off amazon pantry before it went to hell, and one grocery run on top of that has me set for weeks still.
I am likely more worried about catching it than I probably should be. I'm only 43 but diabetic and not doing well with it, and I'm in terrible shape. So I know I'm higher risk of a severe case if i catch it, but its very hard in my brain to not think "if i get it I will end up in the ICU, 100%". I know that's not true, but there's an irrational anxiety there.
The worst thing for me is that for the past ~15 months I've been dealing with some pretty severe mental health issues - mostly depression/severe anxiety. I started seeing a psychiatrist and working with medication for the first time in my life, and much of it has gone extremely poorly. I had two different stretches last year where I didn't leave the house for about 10 weeks, and while i'm an introvert, i'm not that kind of an introvert, I was just super fucked up. I had two months where I had to get my manager involved and update him on these issues because I was struggling to do my job at all and needed to make sure I could avoid a situation where I might get fired. I was prepared to use all of my vacation time because I just wasn't working.
In February we decided that I should probably find a new local psychiatrist (was seeing one via telemedicine in Raleigh that works with my psychologist) and need to start seriously considering more aggressive treatments, one of which might have me taking half days off work every day for 6 weeks for some "intensive outpatient" program.
And now, thanks to coronavirus, any new steps and attempts at progress are indefinitely on hold. I bounced back from the whole "unable to do my job" thing but its still a large struggle and everything but work is still in complete shambles. So the idea of however many weeks or months before being willing to go to a local medical office or treatment center is 100% necessary, but incredibly disheartening.
Despite all that, I'm actually doing okay'ish right now, given the circumstances, since my day to day changed so little, but I am wondering how long I can go in a pretty shitty state without even being able to try something new before that starts seriously weighing me down.
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