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Rumble in The Jungle
This weekend, the Gargoyles, will face off against perennial foe, the SouthPark Cows. Gargoyles' Equipment Manager, Moshe Vest, has gone to the vaults to extract the Goliath Blue uniforms from storage.
In addition to the game, the Gargoyle punters will enjoy many of the lush entertainments offered by the refurbishment of The Concrete Jungle. More than just a face-lift, the new stadium now seats 62,340 and finally has a proportionate number of urinals to beer vendors. Visiting teams are relieved as they would oft find Gargoyle punters using their lockers as make-shift urinals. Security has also been stepped up. The Gargs have hired former defenseman, Wilfred Beaver, to stand outside the visiting side's locker-room to divert bathroom traffic to the appropriate areas. There will, no doubt, be Gargoyle fanatics who will insist on continuing the "Yellowing" tradition. It is said that Beaver's security skills are inadequate at best. He has gotten older since he left the team in season 18, thus his defense skills have probably declined further. You may see a fanatic or two try to take advantage of an error due to a misunderstanding between the home side´s goalie and full backs, to continue the tradition.
Yet, the skeptical Chicago press, is wary of the Gargoyles' chances this week. It appears as though the Gargoyles have finally adopted the 3-forward sets as opposed to the dominating midfield of the 3-5-2. With the brilliant counter attack, that the Cows have implemented, the Gargs could be in some trouble.
Coach Dessaux, taking cues from Chicago Bears' Head Coach, Dick Jauron, has commented, "We need to stack victories in this business. We like our guys and we think that they can get the job done."
Regardless of outcome, this should be a game worth watching as the rivals suit up against each other for the 7th time in their history. The Gargoyles own the head to head matchups, having won six, lost none, and tied none. Will history repeat itself, or will this be The Year of the Cow?
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