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Solecismic · 02-22-2006, 09:52 PM

I'm going to go against conventional wisdom once again and say that tonight was excruciating. I had a hard time just sticking through the entire show. More than once I said to my wife that it just wouldn't be worth it sitting through the entire season with this collection of wannabes.

Paul Abdul is clearly on some wonderful menagerie of medications. Randy Jackson just likes young guys, apparently. And even Simon, who started out on the right track, finally cracked and gave in to the hype.

So, here's part 2 of round one of the latest American Idol, in which was quite a long, long way from American Idyll tonight.

1. Ace Young. He missed a couple of notes, but he has a stage presence, and picked a very tough song which he executed very well. Definitely the exception to the evening. I think he has at least a 50/50 chance of winning the entire competition. Score of 93.

2. Chris Daughtry. He has an excellent voice. My only problem was that he gave a near identical rendition to the original. No question he's in the next round. Score of 85.

3. Gedeon McKinney. Very nice execution and stage presence. He's a bit of a funny kid with the speech patterns, may be a bit of a male Fantasia there. But more likeable. Score of 80.

4. Jose Penala. Give him credit for hitting some tough notes in falsetto. The whole program just didn't come together for me, it was a long way from being presentable. Note the gap here from 3rd to 4th. Score of 65.

5. Elliott Yamin. I'll also give him credit for degree of difficulty. But it was a bit painful to the ear. I thought he was consistently flat and very overrated. Score of 63.

6. Patrick Hall. I was bored. When he was done, I was thinking bottom two. Little did I know it would get worse. Much, much worse. A very ordinary rendition. Score of 62.

7. Taylor Hicks. Not one damned note was in tune. Not a one. I don't care how likeable he is, he has to be the most overrated contestant in history. Score of 60.

8. David Radford. Yes, we get it, you can croon to Queen, too. Is that THE most karaoked song in history? He did okay with it, but there's a reason you can not sit through a night of karaoke without hearing that song. Everyone can sing it, or croon it, or doo-wop it, or whatever. Score of 58.

9. Kevin Covais. This kid is affected beyond human comprehension. He'd probably do the vibratto thing when singing "He's a Jolly Good Fellow" to a classmate at graduation. And get punched in the stomach. He also sounds remarkably like a muppet. Score of 53.

10. Will Makar. Just a very weak performance. Should have been last, but it wasn't. Score of 44.

11. Bobby Bennett. It's good to know what Horatio Sanz would sound like if he made a joke out of Barry Manilow. Score of 39.

12. Bucky Covington. Okay, I hate Skynyrd. I admit it. To me, it's monotone monotony. He made the Skynyrd rendition sound good in comparison. Score of 35.

Prediction: Bobby Bennett and Will Makar exit stage left. Personally, I don't care - there's no way the audience could screw this one up unless they take out one of the top three.

02-22-2006, 09:52 PM	#103
Solecismic Solecismic Software Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Canton, OH	I'm going to go against conventional wisdom once again and say that tonight was excruciating. I had a hard time just sticking through the entire show. More than once I said to my wife that it just wouldn't be worth it sitting through the entire season with this collection of wannabes. Paul Abdul is clearly on some wonderful menagerie of medications. Randy Jackson just likes young guys, apparently. And even Simon, who started out on the right track, finally cracked and gave in to the hype. So, here's part 2 of round one of the latest American Idol, in which was quite a long, long way from American Idyll tonight. 1. Ace Young. He missed a couple of notes, but he has a stage presence, and picked a very tough song which he executed very well. Definitely the exception to the evening. I think he has at least a 50/50 chance of winning the entire competition. Score of 93. 2. Chris Daughtry. He has an excellent voice. My only problem was that he gave a near identical rendition to the original. No question he's in the next round. Score of 85. 3. Gedeon McKinney. Very nice execution and stage presence. He's a bit of a funny kid with the speech patterns, may be a bit of a male Fantasia there. But more likeable. Score of 80. 4. Jose Penala. Give him credit for hitting some tough notes in falsetto. The whole program just didn't come together for me, it was a long way from being presentable. Note the gap here from 3rd to 4th. Score of 65. 5. Elliott Yamin. I'll also give him credit for degree of difficulty. But it was a bit painful to the ear. I thought he was consistently flat and very overrated. Score of 63. 6. Patrick Hall. I was bored. When he was done, I was thinking bottom two. Little did I know it would get worse. Much, much worse. A very ordinary rendition. Score of 62. 7. Taylor Hicks. Not one damned note was in tune. Not a one. I don't care how likeable he is, he has to be the most overrated contestant in history. Score of 60. 8. David Radford. Yes, we get it, you can croon to Queen, too. Is that THE most karaoked song in history? He did okay with it, but there's a reason you can not sit through a night of karaoke without hearing that song. Everyone can sing it, or croon it, or doo-wop it, or whatever. Score of 58. 9. Kevin Covais. This kid is affected beyond human comprehension. He'd probably do the vibratto thing when singing "He's a Jolly Good Fellow" to a classmate at graduation. And get punched in the stomach. He also sounds remarkably like a muppet. Score of 53. 10. Will Makar. Just a very weak performance. Should have been last, but it wasn't. Score of 44. 11. Bobby Bennett. It's good to know what Horatio Sanz would sound like if he made a joke out of Barry Manilow. Score of 39. 12. Bucky Covington. Okay, I hate Skynyrd. I admit it. To me, it's monotone monotony. He made the Skynyrd rendition sound good in comparison. Score of 35. Prediction: Bobby Bennett and Will Makar exit stage left. Personally, I don't care - there's no way the audience could screw this one up unless they take out one of the top three.