Aha! We have our first brave soul to choose the spear. :)

Lefty has been added to the Auction Block.

Hey, if I'm going with the ancient Roman theme, I might as well play the part :)

As Hokius awoke the morning after his first fight, he could still feel the intensity with which the battle had come to it's gory end. The remembrance of the bloodlust which coarsed through the young warrior's veins as he halved DeToxusRoxus made the hairs on his arm stand on end.

"Calm down" he whispered to himself "Today, master Calaleus promised to school me in the art of the axe...I must remain focused on mastering such a deadly weapon."

Soon, the sun would rise and return to it's home in the sky for another day of training. As began to walk away to fetch the morning meal for himself and his master, he spied the bedroll of his former training partner Jeeberus Dee.

"Pity about the poor bastard...but that's what happens when you stay up all night pleasuring one's self before a day of battle."

Gunther want auction!

Gunther want fight!

Gunther want Venti Soy Half-Caf Frappuccino.

Simply awesome. :D

From his hospital bed Rizzaro's ears perk up at the ragged call of his name. He pushes the red-haired canoodling nurse away and pulls himself up, grunting with pain, to the window. In the distance stands the Thunderdome, and amidst the clamor and chaos he spies the bloodied form of JAGus MAXimus. A crooked grin crosses Rizarro's face.

"You magnificent bastard. It'll almost be a shame to kill you. Almost."

Challenge accepted.

Friday's Slave Block:

Rank	Reserve	SlaveName	Date	Weapons	Wounds	Styles	Prestige
0	$12,000.00	Blade	10-Dec-04	Longsword	23	None	0
0	$12,000.00	Little Jeebie Dee	10-Dec-04	Longsword	23	None	0
0	$12,000.00	Raven Hawk	10-Dec-04	Machete	23	None	0
0	$10,000.00	Big Bad	10-Dec-04	Warhammer	20	None	0
0	$10,000.00	Ca$h Money	10-Dec-04	Chains	22	None	0
0	$10,000.00	Love Hurts	10-Dec-04	Claymore	20	None	0
0	$10,000.00	Flatulon	10-Dec-04	Longsword	22	None	0
0	$10,000.00	Gunther GoBoom	10-Dec-04	Chainsaw	21	None	0
0	$10,000.00	Pilot the Cruel	10-Dec-04	Chains	22	None	0
0	$8,000.00	Dr. Fantastic	10-Dec-04	Machete	19	None	0
0	$8,000.00	Erik Flamebeard (of the neither here nor there!)	10-Dec-04	Warhammer	19	None	0
0	$8,000.00	Mucius "The Lefty" Scaevola"	10-Dec-04	Spear	19	None	0
0	$7,000.00	Revile the Revolting	10-Dec-04	Axe	18	None	0

Should I take that as good or bad that I am cheap?

You should take that as bad. However, there is very little variation in Rank 1 fighters, so it's not really bad. On the bright side, you're more likely to be purchased.

Hmm.

Revile the Revolting has 18 'wound points' (or WP)
Froggius has 18 pts.

Revile the Revolting is only worth $7,000 and is the cheapest slave around, obviously not the best fighter around.

Hmm again.
Why do I have the feeling I 'll have to think about finding a new name for my next fighter soon???

Slave Name: Blade6119
Weapon of Choice: Rapier
House of Choice: House of Four Fingers

Get me out there and fighting!!!

News

My sources inside the slave trade industry have informed me that another house has entered the fray. According to this reliable source, the purchaser for the new house was none other than The Rooster, a legend of his day.

For those of you who don't remember The Rooster, he operated the house "Malice Unchained" for five years after he won his freedom. Eventually he went bust. Although he was a good fighter, he was not a good businessman. Malice Unchained has not been in operation in over three years. The Rooster became our favorite celebrity to laugh at. He was often a subject of the "Whatever happened to . . ." question.

Last we heard, The Rooster was a drunk with no money to his name. Where he came into the money to re-open his stable, nobody knows. One thing we do know for sure, that man knew how to fight.

More details as we receive them.

Looks like Little Jeebie Dee might last a little bit longer than his big bro, thank goodness. You know, I always thought there was something a bit off about the elder sibling. I think it had something to do with his chronically hairy palms... :D ;)

Results of the Friday Auction:

Rank	Reserve	SlaveName	Purchaser	Winning Bid
1	$12,000	Blade	The House of Four Fingers	$14,000
1	$12,000	Little Jeebie Dee	Malice Unchained	$15,000
1	$12,000	Blade6119	The House of Four Fingers	$15,000
1	$12,000	Raven Hawk	Malice Unchained	$15,000
1	$10,000	Big Bad	Malice Unchained	$11,000
1	$10,000	Ca$h Money	Malice Unchained	$13,000
1	$10,000	Love Hurts	Bloodhaus	$13,000
1	$10,000	Flatulon	Pain Unlimited	$13,000
1	$10,000	Gunther GoBoom	Bloodhaus	$11,000
1	$10,000	Pilot the Cruel	House Corax	$10,000
1	$8,000	Dr. Fantastic	Malice Unchained	$10,000
1	$8,000	Erik Flamebeard (of the neither here nor there!)	Malice Unchained	$9,000
1	$8,000	Mucius "The Lefty" Scaevola	Bloodhaus	$9,000
1	$7,000	Revile the Revolting	Bloodhaus	$9,000

Feel free to start doling out the challenges! (House Corax got outbid on just about every fighter)

Slave Name: The Real Deal
Weapon of Choice: Lead Pipe
House of Choice: The Rooster

The new house: Malice Unchained has been updated to the house summaries post.

We won all that prize money for Pain Unlimited and he buys one stinkin fighter?

Uh, not that I'm complaining of course, Mr. Torbjorg Andreason, sir.

Dr. Fantastic! Gunther GoBoom challenge you to death!

Gunther want you head on platter. Taste good with Saltines.

Torbjorg went almost broke buying everybody last week. If Pain Unlimited would have lost a couple fighters last week, Mr. Torbjorg would have had to resort to prize fighting to get some more money for stable operations.

In addition, with so many good fighters, he has to make sure that he has enough money to pay entry fees for upcoming matches. ;)

I'll go ahead and enter you for next Friday's auction block. Unfortunately you missed the cut for this week. If I get enough volunteers, I may hold another auction sooner.

Do the challenges we made last week still hold, if the match wasn't held? FFF and I had agreed to get it on.

This challenge would be honored, save for the fact that you are now both owned by Pain Unlimited. You'll need to find somebody else to kill. ;)

Love Hurts? What the hell kind of jive turkey name is that?

Ca$h Money challenges you and your Clay"Aiken"More to the death.

May the bling be with you.

Big Bad want Lefty, want mash Lefty!

Little Jeebie Dee wants to kill Big Bad, bad!

Are you man enough to take the challenge?

Leeetle Jeebie bit off too much Bad

Big Bad drop hammer on Itty Bitty Jeebie

Soon little man, too soon you close eyes for good

Revile the Revolting!

YOU SHALL DIE!

Or anyone else who challenges Erik! Erik shall smash you all. Erik does not fear.

Please check house affiliations . . .

Challenge is nullified as both are members of Malice Unchained.

Big Bad really want mash Lefty now!

MASH LONG TIME!

I speak for Erik Flamebeard of the Neither Here Nor There (mainly because I don't wanna log back out again).

Edit: Nevermind! Erik and Jeebie fight on same side! Revile the Revolting will indeed die! Erik does not read well. Erik only kills well.

I want to make lefty go squish.

Dola-

Or anybody else. I'm having a tough time figuring out who is available.

Bloody Hell!

So who wants to take a shot at the younger of the Dee brothers?

Flatulon, are you up for dying?

I will!

Fonzie,

Thanks for the feedback. Unfortunately for now, you'll just have to sift through it all. I'll see if I can't come up with something easier to read.

Booked!

If you are still alive on 12/16, I will gladly end your miserable excuse for a life.

No worries - I wasn't intending to criticize, just to state that I'm too decaffeinated at present to engage in anything require complex cognition. And this, sadly, represent complex cognitive activity for me at the moment. ;)

You'll have to get in line. :p

RH,

Maybe put all of the tables that get updated in the first post of the thread. That might help.

Excellent!

And I'll be sure to bring my secret weapon...Ernest Lorenzo throwing rocks from the stands!

Muahahaha!

Excellent idea. Unfortunately, I won't be able to attack that project until Monday. I'm heading out of town in a little bit. Thanks for the suggestion.

Not a problem for the great Split Peon, I challenge the winner of the "Flatulon-Little Jeebie Dee" matchup.

Sticks and words may break my bones, but stones will never hurt me. NYA! :p

That will soon be the least of your concerns...puppy.

Looks like the docs are going a little heavy on that medicine. We'll definitely want to fix that so you're clear-headed when I brush your teeth with my chainsaw.

I love you Ca$h Money! Love you so much I'm going to crush you with my affection until your entrails drop to the ground. Then I'm going to use your entrails for my breakfast sausage. Challenge accepted.

Hokius Maximus sinlently laughs at all the challenges flying back and forth, confident in the knowledge that everyone recalls what happened to the last man who faced him. When you split a man in half, people tend to back away.

Is there anyone with the guts to challenge Hokius?

I always thought it was "Two May Enter! One May Leave"

Thou shalt perish at my hand, thy pompousity swiftly extinguished, forsooth, I accept thy challenge. Though I have merited the name that mocks my countenance, yet it is only my features that seem unsightly, and not my tongue, which speaketh as if lined with finest gold--and never, yea, never shall I speak in the vile third-person when referencing mine own greatness, as thou seemest so wont to speak. Fare thee well, wretched heathen Norselander. May flights of Valkyrie swift thee to thy rest.