Some minor news in my weekly walk. The Trumper and Mary both showed up and there were no problems. 10 people showed up (which is a record!) so there were plenty of people to mingle with.

The Trumper has a dinner scheduled for the evening (I didn't sign up for it) and didn't make a reservation even though 8 people signed up for it so we'll see if he did so.

There's a new woman that showed to the last couple walks. She seems to have similar interests to me. She also mentioned that she wants a workout partner and I think I'll volunteer.

Sarah was also there with her daughters but she cut halfway through the walk (I scheduled the walk this way because in the past I've had elderly people who couldn't walk a 5k). She messaged me that she got tired but honestly I don't know if I believe it.

Very common for the snowflakes to actually melt when pressed

Congrats


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Honestly I think you people are being too harsh on the particular Trumper in this group.

But honestly I was slightly worried there would be a scene but there was none.

How to (successfully) hit on a coworker.
 

Because of your second sentence is why the feelings exists


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I guess that's fair (which is a common phrase said by Barbara)

Good sign. Shows she takes time to weight the pluses & minuses, pros & cons, and comes to a decision. Doesn't jump to conclusions.

Can you just update the thread title when someone has some sex?

I think only flere can do that


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

If only I had such power.

My mouth had sex with a Philly cheese-steak the other day. Should I go into more detail?

I'd settle for some more NFL WIPs

Note to self:

When organizing an event on meetup, people will always follow gps directions to the wrong locations rather than look at the map you posted (with meeting location) on the event website.

On the positive side I did ask Sarah to go kayaking with just me and she agreed (and gave me her number).

:thumbsup:

Winning


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

So she went kayaking with me. We really connected quite well. I also learned that I underestimated her age by a least a decade. Otherwise on a dating checklist she checked pretty much all the boxes I want in a woman.

If I don't date her I definitely want her as a close friend.

Well I got a text from Sarah saying she doesn't want to go kayaking with me next week.

I am dejected right now.

Doesn't want to? Are you reading into that or did she literally say those words?

I offered to go Tuesday or Wednesday depending on the weather (There are some scattered rains in the area and the rest of the week cools down).

To quote her text "Thank you Nobodyhere but you go ahead"

Yeah, I think that's it for Sarah.

But hey, you've now got some good experience for the next one

Well I'm not giving up quite yet. Unlike my coworkers I'm willing to push things more.

This part is to add some excess drama. But I spotted her talking to another man on my walk today and they exchanged phone numbers!*

*My walks are for people to socialize with others but still I am quite jealous that this other guy monopolized her time and I didn't get a good chance to socialize with her.

Women just do not get what a total disaster it is for men to stick their necks out only to get their heads cut off. I wish women would understand how that rejection feels.

Equality= BS

NEXT! Definitely move on. Your best bet here is that she likes the drama and would string you along. At best. At worst, she's just not interested. Either way, not someone you want to be involved with.

:+1:

So is there anyone from your Asian ring available?

Rejection sucks, but I have never felt the need to go for a run without listening to music, been afraid to walk to my car alone in a parking garage, someone following me to my room in a hotel, having my drink spiked...

Like I said, rejection sucks, but women have it FAR worse then men do.

Take a 4 week trip to Asia (pick any country) and get yourself on the local scene and on the local Match, Tinder etc.

I'm sure you'll get interest from a lot of "professionals" but you'll get a fair share of regular women too. Go in with your eyes wide open, your main appeal (for vast majority of non-pro women responding to you) is your ability to support her (and her extended family) and US citizenship. It'll start there and up to you to progress from there.

(And definitely don't start off with dominatrix roleplay. I'm pretty sure you'll scare off regular women)

FWIW, I had a colleague back in the 90's that got a Russian mail-order bride. He was divorced and wanted someone non-US. She had kids and he became an instant dad. I don't know the situation now but he was happily married for at least a couple years when I knew him. Maybe check out mail-order brides?

This is the strangest dating advice I have ever seen

agreed

....

Options, he needs options.

These aren't really options, though. They're pay-to-play with a greater time and resource commitment that ends approximately the same as going the pro route. He'll rack up a marriage, a kid or two with that valuable American citizenship, and a divorce after which she heads back to the homeland.

It's a movie I've seen play out multiple times

Women are not aliens, property or commodities. Dating works just fine if you can think of each one as an individual with her own motivations and needs.

So, Sarah didn't work out. That's fine. Be happy for her if she makes a connection on your walk.

Men have it far easier. All we have to do is learn to read and not be assholes when we don't get our way.

Good Christ, NO!

It's not easier when you're 5'3. Most women have written you off already.

They won't overlook you if you read them right.

Too often, what I see is men making a decision as to what they want, and then going in and trying to make it happen and becoming indignant when they feel their wants are reasonable and it doesn't work.

Dating is about finding out if your needs and her needs are compatible.

The height issue is a real one. Women want to feel protected, and that visual seems to be how this works. Very tall women have the same problem. They're often OK with the height issue, but many men can't handle it, either.

Your potential pool is smaller, literally. But there are more women looking for relationships than men. The numbers work out, you just have to put yourself out there. The downside for many of us is that we feel the same way about "a few extra pounds" on women, which these days often stretches the word "few" a few more sizes. Maybe we can't get over that.

They are definitely are options.

They may also be "pay-to-play" but I don't really know your definition. I assume you mean that Nobody has to pay significant amount of $ throughout the courtship? If this correct, regular dating in the US is "pay-to-play".

Your last sentence assumes the vast majority of these marriages are a "sham", that all she'll want is the green card and then say "see ya" in 2-5 (?) years. There is no doubt US green card (or any western country) is a compelling differentiator but I'd dispute the vast majority (or even majority) is a sham.

I looked and was not able to find any stats (e.g. how many US-Foreign marriages result in divorce after X years would probably give a high-water indicator). If you have those stats, share them. I will say that I've known 2 Filipino born nurses married to US citizens, immigrated and they are still happily married.

I disagree to "most women". It's definitely a factor but there are other factors.

So instead of focusing on height, which you can't control, what are other things that will make you more attractive to a woman? Go through an internal SWOT analysis - strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, threats. (Well, maybe not so much threats). Figure it out and come up with a 6-12 month plan.

Let's put it this way. If you have bad hygiene, really overweight, can't hold a conversation etc. your pool will also be smaller in Asia (e.g. it won't be because of height).

Height is absolutely a deal breaker for most women.

I did find this interesting chart

400 Bad Request

I saw this tweet and thought of this thread...

WHO EVEN NEEDS A SIGNIFICANT OTHER WHEN YOU HAVE CFB TO DESTROY YOUR MENTAL HEALTH

— T Stoy (@stoy_taylor) September 18, 2022

Interesting chart. I was looking at Females on the 5'3" row for 1988-94.

20-29 years - 34.3% of women are 5'3" or shorter
70-79 years - 61.2% of women are 5'3" or shorter

Am I reading this right? Does this indicate shorter women die earlier than taller women?

hmm, I dunno. But I did learn I am taller than 98% of my peers.

Made me look at average heights around the world. More evidence that Nobody should expand search criteria to overseas and/or Asians.

Average height for women worldwide

Maybe someone should start a dating app for short dudes?

I’m tall enough. 5’10”.

I think this indicates that the average height of humans continues to increase with better nutrition in our early years. It also indicates that people shrink as they get older. My Dad was over 6'1" when I was growing up, and at 77 is now under 6'.

Yes, I noticed the first. Not surprising, when I go into museums I think ... people used to fit in that?

Didn't think about shrinking when you get older, good point. I guess for women there is osteoporosis.

Wassup shorty?!:D

Well on a positive note today I learned that Barbara is going to be moving into an apartment just about a mile down the road from me.

Sasquatch

On the positive side, little people are about the only ones who can travel comfortably on a commercial airliner these days.

I think, after a year of trying, it's best not to assume Barbara's move is germane to your original topic pursuit.

OK, I just youtubed Randy Newman's one-hit wonder (only top 40 single, though he has had a long and successful career).

This thread takes so many weird turns whenever I try to catch up with it, but I think we can all agree on this.

SI

As someone who works in HR, I absolutely cringe every time I see the title of this thread.

Hypocritical, I know, since I met my wife at work. But we were also just kids, not working in a professional environment.

I miss you my friend!

Hey there! You know, I'm friends with this dude on FB who reminds me of you...except he's like this family man and isn't a fiery debater and late-night drunk poster.

It's too bad we don't have Ime Udoka on this board for his input, though surely there's more to that story than just co-worker.

Udoka was banging a VPs wife apparently?

sounds like a hell of a guy

Is it strange to be excited that after 20+ years on this board (though admittedly mostly absent for the past dozen years), to FINALLY have Jim quote one of my posts?

Dola-

He's a'ight.

Ah, the ol' Terry Bowden move! Niiiiiiiiice

So two things of note happened this week.

My boss interviewed a person for a new rumored position of HR manager who is suppose to implement some new policies. He only interviews front office people so we know she's not a production worker (that and the way she dressed). And I don't know if she's single yet. So Barbara better stop waffling.

Second thing is that my walk had it's biggest turnout yet with 9 people showing up. Part of the meetup was going to a local bar for drinks and 6 people stayed. One of the women who stayed (let's call her Amber) asked me for my number and asked if we could go on a one-on-one walk tomorrow. Honestly I was kind of shocked because although I did talk with her most of the walk, and while the conversation while good it wasn't exactly electrifying. But of course I said yes.

The correct answer

I like her intention and willing to take a risk


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Nice!

Good to hear!

One thing that Amber did mention to me is that the Trumper tried to ask her out on a previous meetup but she turned him down. :devil:

To give an update:

I'm told my boss didn't hire the HR person because she lacked the qualifications he was looking for in the position. So I'm free to hit on my coworker if necessary.

I did a workout with Amber (which consisted of a 30 minute workout on an elliptical) and it went well and I'm expecting more workout days in the future. She asked to me to go to a movie and dinner tomorrow which I agreed to. So expect a review of Bullet Train tomorrow.

With that said, I'm kind of 50/50 on her intentions. Half of me thinks she really into me, while the other half thinks she just wants a workout buddy and social wingman. I'll take either one as I really like her but I'm not "gaga" yet.


By the way, do you all prefer a dinner and a movie, or a movie and a dinner?
I know that former is traditional but it seems harder to time a movie than a dinner. Plus if you see the movie first then it is great conversational piece at dinner.

It's up to you, if I'm reading this correctly. She is making this easy.

If you're not gaga, either you should avoid singing about Alejandro or you should friend zone her. Men rarely discover an attraction if they don't have it right away. And if you're not strongly attracted now and start something up, it's not fair to her.

Who is Alejandro?

I would do movie then dinner. Like you say, a good conversation piece.

Don't know your definition of "gaga" but if there is some attraction, I'd encourage it and see where this leads. I don't really believe in love (vs lust) at first sight, and believe relationships take time to develop.

Be sure to think up of how to end the dinner - whose paying, "want to do X next weekend" etc.

I thought this was the 2020s where people pay their own share.

I'll offer to pay and see what she says.

Also I feel I am close to dragging Barabara out on one of these walks. Even if I don't date her I think it would be good for her.

Ugh, just got asked by a guy that I assume is in wheelchair to join us on our "walk" this week. I had to turn him down because this weeks chosen walk isn't wheelchair friendly.

Next week I can accommodate him on a paved route.

Wasn't Lady Gaga singing about Alejandro?

dude, stop thinking so hard about your date with Amber. It's good energy to get out there and take swings. Go and turn your brain off for the night.

Live look in

Yup, whether it turns out to be something or not, he's in the game.

Check it out? Might be worth the investment?

https://img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-st...t-quality=auto

Movie then dinner, so if the conversation is going well, you can linger and aren't under time pressure.

Also, she's in to you - the key is mentioning Trumper asked her out and she said no. If she wasn't interested beyond a platonic thing, she wouldn't have brought that up

So was there sex?

I read that "linger" with an "f" instead of a "L" and thought you were expecting that date to go really well. :D

I didn't even think about this point but it could very well be true.

Anyways yes, she is into me. We saw the movie (which I paid for) and had dinner (which I offered to pay for but we paid for our own meals). We did smooch after we left the resteraunt.

This morning at our walk (which had a record turnout of about 15 people) we held hands during 80% which we both would like to think made the Trumper insanely jealous.

This week we're doing our weekly workout and I invited her over to my place on Saturday.

Congrats!

A key win for FOFC

Amber also told me that the Trumper was also banned from another meetup group because he would try to hit on women and not take "no" for an answer.

A great day for FOFC, and therefore, the world.

Great update!

:lol:

Nice!

The Trumper has been spamming a "Strength Training" meetup for pretty much every other day for the next month. Maybe schedule one or two to see if people are interested?

ETA: But no seriously he posted 18 events for the next month. I'm not sure if this is his intent but I'm worried that his spamming might prevent people from finding my weekly walk which I have grown quite fond of.

Heck's he's still spamming them.

I asked the Trumper why he was scheduling so many events and this was his response.

He's not exactly wrong but at least gauge interest before spamming the group with 20+ events.

I wouldn’t sweat it

People into strength training will go to that and people that don’t want that will come to yours

It really doesn’t matter

Ignore him and you do you boo


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I'm mostly concerned that people won't be able to find legitimate events (such as my walks) amidst all his spam.

add a catchy picture to yours to get their attention. Works on Facebook.

So what's up next?

Inquiring minds want to know.

Hopefully his penis in her vagina....

Well we did a workout today, and she's coming over to my place on Saturday sometime after the group walk.

Did anyone watch that Dahmer movie that starred Hawkeye in the title role?

The actual documentary-style Dahmer stream is coming to Netflix on Friday (the Dahmer Tapes). I'll watch that. Not really interested in fictionalized history.

The Dahmer Tapes will be an instant watch for me. The Dahmer show, maybe I'll get to it when there's nothing else to watch.