This spring my soon-to-be 5 year old (at the time) wanted to go on Space Mountain when we were at Disney World... so we decided to let him after many attempts at trying to convince him otherwise. He was about 3 inches taller than the minimum height requirement.

So, we stood in line for about 15 minutes, and he got on... on Space Mountain, the seats are in single file, so he had to sit by himself, with me in front, and my wife in back. He did not make a single noise the entire ride. And when we got off, my wife asked him "Did you like it?"

He said "No. No, I did not like it." But he still bugged us to go on every ride, then would start crying when the seats came into view wanting to leave. So, one of us always entered a ride line, knowing we'd have to get out of line to go with him back to his grandma.

Last night we were watching Hellboy with Andrew (the five year old). He turns to my wife and says, "Why do they call him Hellboy?"

My wife says, "Well, in the movie, he comes from a place called Hell."

Andrew: "So is Hell a state, like Virginia?"

Wife: "No, some people believe it's a place where bad people go when they die, and where devils live."

Andrew: "Do you believe in Hell?"

Wife: "No."

Andrew: "What about you, Dad?"

Me: "Yes."

Andrew thinks for a second, then turns to me and says, "I think you're right, Dad. Sorry, Mom."

Heh.

and why didn't you answer him that yes, Virginia is like Hell?

:D

FM

We've had the Scooby Doo too scary with the questions as well. We stopped watching it. My kids wake up early as is, I don't need them getting up a couple hours earlier because of bad dreams.

I hope this convo was typed up, printed out, and framed :)

Conversation w/ my daughter as she went potty this morning...

syd: I'm a grown up!

me: Not yet.

syd: I'm a grown up!

me: You're a big girl, but not a grown up.

syd: (STARE)

me: When you are a grown up, you have to get a job.

me: You can't take naps anymore.

me: You have to eat your vegtables.

syd: I'm a girl.

me: That's right darlin. Nice and slow.


:)

Gold!

I nominate Sachmo for FOFC Parent of the Week.

That is absolutely classic. :)

Drew dropped one on my wife last night at dinner. For weeks he's gone on and on about wanting to be a black cat for Halloween. So we got him the whole get-up, and have been making a big deal out of it to fuel his excitement. But last night he says, "I don't want to be a black cat, I want to be Scooby Doo." It was just like a commercial. You should have seen my wife's face. tee-hee

Tonight is our town's Halloween "walk around" for kids. Basically, a survival of the fittest candy-fest through the downtown streets and shops. Wish us luck.

At least you get to take your tribute. It's good to be the king.

A couple of nights ago, when I was away, Zachary went into the nursury to grab some of his cars and trains that his little brother had secreted in there. He somehow pushed the dresser over from its pedestal and it landed against the door, effectively locking him in there. My wife couldn't get in, and he couldn't get out. He was quite upset and cried because he didn't know what to do.

Eventually, they made a space wide enough for Cole (10), to slide through, and he moved the dresser enough to get my wife in to get him.

Just one of those funny kid stories.

After action report:

1. Drew looked great as a black cat. Cute as could be. The only "costume malfunction" was him constantly holding his tail. Oh, and...

2. Only major boo hoo was when he dropped his box of "Nerds" (candy) and they spilled all over the place. Messed up his cat nose/whisker face paint a bit.

3. We screwed up on the times. Treak or treating ended at 7:00 p.m., but with work and dinner we didn't get out there until just prior to that time. So Drew didn't rake in much candy.

4. Hay rides were going on throughout the downtown area, but the people must have been nailed down or something, because they never seemed to get off and let other people on. This was a major bummer for the kids, and a source of ongoing whining.

5. My wife stumbled over some train tracks, fell and hurt her knee, and farted in the process. Despite the minor injury, this was a major hoot.

And now the humiliation is complete. :D

Just got caught up on the thread, thought I'd get in...
My wife and I have a four year old son named Jackson. He just had his first car accident. We were at a used car lot and were getting ready to take a mazda pickup for a test drive. As I was fiddling with the car seat and seat belt, Jackson bumped the shifter from Park to 1st and the pickup started rolling, it bumped into another car and cracked its bumper. I was ticked and pulled him out of the pickup, we took a walk and I talked to him for a few minutes. When we walk back, there is the salesman offering a balloon to Jackson. I say no and Jackson starts crying.

I'm still steamed about it but Jackson doesn't really understand what happened, muchless how to prevent it in the future.

Oh the days of black cats, butterflies, devils and hayrides. My wife was bummed last night. You see, at my youngest daughter's school they have a Fall Festival/Halloween carnival. Every year my wife will go up there and walk around with our kids as they play the various games to win the cheap-ass little prizes and the candy. It has really been a bonding time, as even my mother-in-law will go so that they can share the time together and the fun and laughter.

Last night my youngest told my wife that she wanted to walk around with her friends instead of hang with mommy. They grow up so fast. It'll be the first time in ten years that my wife won't have a kid to walk around with. She almost cried.

Oh, and while I'm on the subject, enjoy the times that you can tell your kids where they are going to go, what they are going to wear, when they will go and when they will come. At some point they will hit high school, you will become as important as that old Barney tape (or whatever/whoever replaced Barney these days) and rather than being the source of all that is good you will become the source of all that is evil.

Enjoy these times!!! They will not last! Oh, and take lots and lots of pictures of your kids in compromising positions. You can use them to your advantage when they hit high school.

Me: Oh yeah, well I'm going to show Kevin that picture of you on the potty!!

Her: Dad!! NOOOOOOO!!!!

ME: Okay then, get off the computer at 9 like I said. No later.

Her: Uh, Dayyyuuud! (we live in the South)

Me: Picture. Remember?

Her: Ughhhh! (storms off to computer room and types furiously to her friends about how mean I am)

These are the times to remember, cause the will not last forever...

Allergy sufferers a solution in sight!
 

We are studying snails in science, and we were talking about what they eat. Cole (10) replies,

"Snails are allergy eaters."

Good to know.

Zach (3) comes down from naptime, and announces,

"I have a car in my butt."

And he really did. No real reason why though. He just did.

:D

Okay now THAT was funny.

tonight was one of those magical night, went trick or treating with the kids. First was supposed to be only Andrew and then I thought "oh what the heck, let's bring Matty, we'l walk some 20 minutes and I'll stop by the house and let him back in and I'll keep going with Andrew". Well, Matty walked with us a whole hour, raking in the candies like a madman, all dressed up in his toddler Vader outfit, I almost ate him whole about a dozen times :D

FM

Cool, FM!

Wish we could say the same. It rained literally all day and night in St. Louis, and it was miserable. My wife took Drew trick-or-treating around our cul-de-sac, but that was it. He took it well but it was still kind of a bummer.

Next up: 4th birthday party on Saturday.

I had a scary moment on Saturday night/Sunday Morning. My daughter called out in the night, and I went to her room and found her wheezing and struggling to breath. She was suffering from the Croupe virus and the Strider condition (Coupe is the inflamation of the vocal cords for adults the virus becomes laryngitis, Strider is the condition that causes the difficulty breathing).

My older son had this problem years ago, and it was so bad we had to go to the emergency room, so I was familiar with what was going on. I tried treating Bailey with steam, but she was so paniced she wouldn't relax, making the condition worse. I gave her an Abutoral breathing treatment, but it was ineffective. After exhausting what I could do at home, I loaded her in the car and headed to the emergency room.

On the way I rolled down the windows because the fresh, moist air is good way to combat Strider. After being on the road for 15 minutes and forcing her to talk to me periodically to make sure she was still breathing, I heard her breathing easy up. I was able to turn around, go home and treat her again with steam in the bathroom. I felt like if I could get her to relax, I could get the condition to abate to the point she would be able to sleep through the night. But even knowing how to treat the condition, when your child is stuggling to breath it will firmly plant your heart in your throat.

My daughter is 3 and half, which is old for Strider to be a problem, typically it only affects children under 3. If you have a small child, pray you don't have to deal with this.

Scary stuff indeed, Breeze. I can relate to some degree. Drew is asthmatic, and was hospitalized for RSV and pneumonia a couple years ago. Most frightening episode of my life.

very rough stuff Breeze. So far, knock on wood, we've been blessed with healthy kiddos. Most frightening event wasn't any of them not being able to breathe, but Andrew being unable to bear any weight on his right leg. From playing soccer on a Wednesday night to slightly limping on Friday morning, to havign a hard time walking by 4pm on Friday to simply being unable to lift his right leg on Saturday morning. He was his soccer coach back then and I couldn't remember him hurting himself while playing, so I was at a loss to explain it. I was thinking about the worst degenrative kind of crap, even flash eating bacteria. Yeah extreme, but he was our only child back at the time and you know how parents can be protective of their kiddos.

We took him to the ER, where his condition wasn't deemed to be very urgent so we spent a nice 4 hours waiting until they saw him and diagnosed him with a transient synovitis of the hip, basically something that can come and go, which it did. Saturday was his worst day, then it got better on Sunday and on Monday he was up to maybe 85% then back to normal on Tuesday. Freaky episode...

FM

Zachary (3) is still potty training, so getting him to potty when he is supposed to is a big deal. It is a nice day today, 50 degrees or so and sunny, and they little boys are out in the backyard playing. And standing there in the middle of the yard with his little white butt sticking out is Zach, watering the yard. He just likes to go in the great outdoors.

This has to be a male right of passage, don't we all just prefer to go wherever? I do. :)

Since Oliegirl is still having knee problems, I took Anthony out trick-or-treating Monday night. The highlight of the night was the haunted house. It was a very well done haunted house. We got in line and I asked one of the parents in charge if kids Anthony's age came by. She said "yes, but that's about as young as I'll let in." But Anthony has a good grasp on what's real and what isn't and he was determined to go, even though everyone else in the line was teenagers or older.

The house itself was really well done, the stuff they had was based off of horror movies. In their living room they had the TV set on one of the scenes from the video on The Ring, and a girl comes creeping out from behind the TV, the look was perfect. She gets to the people walking through and grabs one of them and starts shrieking. That was my favorite part b/c i love the movie, but back to Anthony. We then go outside where there are people dressed up like zombies and witches and such, but they obviously paid attention to the older kids and left Anthony alone. We turn a corner and they have a very nice, pitch black setup heading into their garage. They had people popping out from everywhere. Basically, if you were the first person in line, I don't care how old you were, you'd have been quite startled and caught off guard a number of times. But we were in the back of the line and saw it all from a distance.

We got out and Anthony said "What's the big deal, that wasn't scary." I tried to explain the perspective that the guys in the front got a lot more scared than the ones in the back. He didn't get it, but it doesn't matter, he wasn't scared at the haunted house and I think he's quite proud of himself because of it :)

Fastforward to last night, where he decided to get himself in trouble for absolutely no reason whatsoever. I'm suprised Oliegirl hasn't posted about this yet honestly :) The teacher gave the kids a pass on Monday homework b/c of Halloween, so last night he had two nights worth of homework to do. Julie asked him about his homework and he'd obviously only done Tuesday night's homework, not Monday's. When Julie asked him about it(just to remind him to get it all done), he told her that he did his homework with his grandmother the night before(he spent the night over there after trick-or-treating). Julie and her mom are real close and they talk multiple times a day, so Julie knew this was a lie. She pressed Atnhony on it and he responded 4 or 5 times with a bigger and bigger lie, enhancing the story and trying to give details about how he did his homework with her. Then when Julie said she'd call 'Grammy' to make sure he broke down and admitted that he'd lied.

She was infuriated, as was I when I got home. We have always made honesty and trust the most important focus with Anthony, and he knows that lying is a *big deal*. Grammy is upset that he used her in his story, so he's in hot water all the way around. He's in some trouble this weekend as a result, but I of course know it'll happen again, but we have to reinforce how important it is to be honest with people, and have to show him that the consequences of lying about something are always worse than what might have happened had he told the truth(in this case, nothing would have happened, he'd have spent 10 more minutes finishing his homework).

I have so been there and done that. Cole (10) went through this (still going). The worst part is not only did he lie, but he knew that I knew the real answer, and yet, he totally refused to admit to the truth. He is quite strong willed and it took at least 2 hours of constant pressure and losing of privleges until he finally relented. There is almost nothing more frustrating as a parent then trying to get him to see that the truth is so much less painful than a lie, that you should do that first. After all that, he still doesn't get it. It is almost like "Damn you! I'll learn my own way." Oh yeah, he and I are going to have some major run ins as he hits his teenage years.

You posted something similar to that in response to my lying story of a few weeks ago, you are steady, that's good ;)

Seriously, I think it's the best way to see it, keep reinforcing to him that lying will usually bring more bad than up front telling the truth. I also try to make him understand that most lies you say will at some point come back to haunt you. Sure, there are those little white lies (Honey, do I look fat to you? NOOOOO! you're perfect :D) but it's hard for a kid from 8 to say 12 to understand the difference...

FM

We are consistently working on that...however, I birth very thick skulled children and it hasn't sunk in yet.

After the Tuesday homework incident, Wed was fine, but Thursday I asked if he had homework, he said no. I told him to check his agenda book, which he did and then told me he didn't hve homework. I went to reach for the book and said "well, let me check just in case" and he tries to hide it from me...so I grab it from him and look at the day's assignment - read 30 minutes. I ask if he saw this before he told me he didn't have homework and he says yes...so I immediately ground him for the weekend and lay into him about how dumb it is to lie about stuff (the kicker is he reads himself to sleep for at least 30 minutes every night anyway so it wasn't something I was going to say "go do now"...) and how he'll always get caught and the punishment for lying is always worse than the punishment for whatever you wanted to lie about. We get through the weekend relatively unscathes, a few minor incidents regarding following instructions, but then last night radii calls him down for dinner, asks him on the way down the stairs - did you turn off the lights in your room. Anthony says yes - radii starts up the stairs and says "I want to double check", at which point Anthony freaks out and says "no, don't come up here"...radii tells him not to move, goes upstairs and sure enough the lights are on. So now he is grounded tomorrow after school (it's a half day so this is actually a big deal) and I have had about all I can take of him.

This afternoon, after he gets off the bus - he decides it would be fun to throw a girls backpack on the street...for no reason. So I guess now we are switching from lying to violence. Lucky me. As I have told radii a lot the last week, HIS child is driving me crazy!

Oh Lord, give me strength.

Both twins are teething right now. They woke up last night at 11:30 just SCREAMING. Luckily Catherine is smart enough to fall back asleep after you settle her down. No such luck with James. The only way my wife could get him quiet was to put him in bed with us.

Unfortunately I can't sleep with a baby in bed with me. So last night was on the couch for me.

I'm keeping my fingers crossed and saying a prayer that tonight will be better.

Cam,

You are giving me nightmares. Thanks so much. I will keel you.

I probably should have put this in here instead of a main forum thread, so just in case ...
http://dynamic.gamespy.com/~fof/foru...ad.php?t=44356

Just found it today, after reading SD's Civ dynasty. I guess the tooth fairy story would get more play in this thread than the other forum.

I'll make an "introductory post" at some point. Luckily for us, we aren't having any crises at the moment.

Got a notification of your reply and wondered immediately of thinking about bringing your attention to this thread :)

And we're not only talking about crises, there have been plenty of good moments too :)

FM

Job Update
 

As some of you know, we are in tight financial straights. When I started this endeavor almost 6 years ago I had no idea that the state of the aviation industry would be like it is now. This last year, we finally started to make some progress. We had been having some successes with our budgeting and I was making enough money for us to be able to pay all the bills and live under our tight spending restrictions. A little over a month ago, the parent company of the airline that I work for went bankrupt, taking us along into bankruptcy with them. They drastically cut our flying and that has meant that the fleet is shrinking.

A backround in aviation economics goes like this. Captains make about 50% more that first officers. Six years ago, when I started in flight school the average upgrade time was about 2 years. Base pay ranges for first officers are generally between 20-40k, while captains are 55-110k. More of less money can be made depending on your work schedule.

Each aircraft needs 10 pilots to fly. So if you have 50 planes in your fleet you need to have 250 capitains, and 250 first officers. Essetially, if your company is expanding there is upward movement in the seniority list and more job secutity to boot, as there will be more pilots underneath you.

I have not upgraded, and will be starting my 4th year with the company in January. It was something that we were really banking on and the fact that it hasn't already happened has been a hard pill to swallow. We do not own a house, and our 3 boys are rapidly outgrowing out 1150sq foot 3br duplex.

The company is starting off by reducing the number of airplanes by 15. Simply read that is 150 jobs that will be eliminated from the company in the begining. At this point, I am not in danger of losing my job (I started off with about 500 pilots below me), however I can't say that it hasn't crossed my mind.

Along with that the company is ready to impose changes to our work rules, and a pay cut along the lines of 20% for the aircraft that I fly. To top that off for first officers at the 4th year and above the yearly cost of living increase is about one half of one percent. So essentially, each year is a paycut due to inflation. With no good news on the forefront, and no upgrade postition in sight it is putting a strain on our family.

We are now in the position of shrinking our budget even more for the foreseeable future. They say that the aviation businees is not for the weak hearted, and they say that you aren't really a pilot until you are furloughed (fired by still contracted to the company and available to be recalled back to work should they need more workers). I have only one shot at this career, and given the amount of money that I invested to get here(think six figures) I cannot abandon it just yet.

I am having some very difficult times thinking about how unfair this is to my family. I feel like I have let everyone down, as this was a decision that was totally mine, and now I need to live with it.

Negotiations are ongoing and nothing is set in stone yet. Good news may be ono the horizon, but not until we emerge from bankruptcy. Who knows when that will happen. Another terrorist attack, or oil prices staying at 70/barrell could spell the end of it altogether.

Please pray for us in this time of uncertainty.

PM, rough situation. I don't pray much but you and your family are in my thoughts my friend. Stay strong, do not despair, better times will come...

FM

FM - although you feel bad, I can assure that your wife and children are behind you 100% - that is what families do! One of the great things about being married and having a family is that there are ALWAYS people who believe in you and support your decisions...you guys will get through this and move on to happier and more financially secure times. Just hang in there and don't let it get you down too much :)

I was speaking of good moments and I had a sweet one with my oldest, Andrew, this last Saturday. As some of you know, he and I both practice kenpo karate. We both have three one hour classes a week and starting this Fall, our Saturdays have become almost completely dedicated to karate, with a first class (traditional) at 11:15am where we both go our way (separate rooms, him with kids, me with adults) and a second one at 2:15pm where we take the class together as it's a competition class where we learn to control the bo staff.

In that second class, I'm one of only two adults that are attending. I told the teacher, a 19yo kid, not to pay too much attention to me and that I'd simply follow along with the class with Andrew no matter if I'm learning faster (or maybe slower on some moves ;)) than the kids. Anyway, I'm tough on Andrew, especially in that second class. I will not accept that he wastes his time when the teacher shows us something and then asks us to practice on our own, and even more so, I won't accept that he wastes the time of others by goofing around, which he can do very easily.

I've come to enjoy the Saturdays lately as he is getting better, little by little, not so much with the bo itself, but more in controlling his behaviour and he's received good comments from his morning teacher. This Saturday, he showed me a maturity that I'd never seen before. We were in the locker room prior to our afternoon class and I commented to him that I was looking forward to see if Matty would ever follow our footsteps and practice karate too. Andrew told me he was certain that he would. I joked to him that he was saying that because Matty always wants to do like his older brother (which he really does ;)) and Andrew smiled and said a simple yeah. I then told him that he'd have to keep on doing karate for a few years more as Matty is not even 2 and they don't start kiddos until they're at least 4. To that, Andrew replied, in his most serious voice: "oh dad, I don't plan on stopping anytime soon. I want to get a black belt." :)

We'd never brushed the possibility of him getting a black belt before. I mean, in January, it will have been 4 years since he started practicing and he's now a blue belt with a green stripe. He still has to get his green belt, then a brown stripe on his green belt, then a brown belt, then a black stripe on his brown belt before finally being allowed to test for his black belt. So he's got time to do before he gets to the black belt and honestly, I've not seen many kids under 10 get a black belt and he's 8 and a half... Had he told me this when he had just started, say after a month or two of practicing, at the ripe age of 5, I'd have taken that with a grain of salt, like "yeah, yeah, we'll talk again in a couple years" but now, he knows what it will take him to get that black belt and he looked dead serious about it. That showed me he had matured, and it made me feel proud of my boy. :)

FWIW, I'm a green belt with a brown stripe and there are talks of a possible brown belt test coming up for me. I'd assume that with steady practice, I could probably be testing for my black belt in a year to 18 months. Maybe that's what made him realize that he could do it. I mean, he may be thinking that if daddy is somewhat close, maybe he can do it too. That thought makes it so much sweeter to the father's heart in me.

That turned out to be a long story, thanks for reading it :)

FM

Well, yesterday was a big day in the world of Lucy.

Tony and I took Lucy to the pediatrician for her four-month shots/well-baby check-up. She tipped the sacle at a hefty 15 lbs, 1 oz and is 25.25 inches long. :eek: These numbers put her in the 90th and 80th percentiles, respectively. It really surprised everyone when she was born just how big she was -- 8 lbs, 4 ozs, 19.5 inches -- considering that Tony and I were both significantly smaller as babies. I guess that it will all settle down later. Or she will have head specialty. ;)

Lucy did relatively well through the check-up and shots. If she is in Tony or my arms, she is a little charmer, but she is very aware and wary of strangers and isn't too wild about new situations. She cried, of course, but even after the shots, she settled down eventually. She had her revenge, though. Tony and I got our flu shots after her. And yes, she smiled when we told her that we were getting shots, too.

We also got the go-ahead for starting solids. That is going to be fun. ;) We'll have to go shopping for a high-chair/ feeding seat something and a convertible seat for the car here soon.

Tony's vacation time is coming up next week, so we'll be heading up to the folks' house for five days/four nights. It'll be interesting. At 3 outfits a day for spit-up-er and 2ish for spit-up-ee, we'll be looking at something like 354641 loads of laundry once we get back. We'll also get to hear the cat howl for the drive up and back. Other than that, I hope that the trip is not too stressful.

Have fun on the trip! Elaine took the babies to Oklahoma in August to drop our oldest off at college. It wasn't the greatest experience she's ever had. :)

James (7 month old) had to go to the doctor's today. Pink eye and an ear infection. But he's the happy kid, so he's not complaining too much.

Our troublemaker is definitely Catherine. At 7 months, she's already crawling, standing, and now cruising.

By the way, Satch... last night the babies were okay. Slept from about 7:15 til 6:30.

quick question to everyone frequenting this thread: anybody in here read/know about the comic strip called "Baby Blues"?

I love it and just can't get enough of it. So much of it is just like us, put into comics, it's frightening... I bought one of their collection off of bookcloseouts.com last Summer and I immediately ordered 8 or 9 of the other collections they had in stock. There are something like 19 collections in the series...

FM

Thanks! The drive is not that bad (we've been up there several times already), but this will be the longest trip by far.

Wow, 7 mos. and really mobile -- that is just scary to think about. I haven't even begun to baby-proof things here.

FM: I like Baby Blues! When I got the paper, it was one of the comics. That Zoe is quite a little tyke!

Pilotman,

hang in there, man. With the price of fuel going down, hopefully things will start looking better for your company.

Yesterday just before lunch I get a frantic call from my wife.

“Our son is freaking out at daycare…crying uncontrollably and kicking the teachers. Can you go get him?!?”

So I went to get him.

He’s in the administrative office, sitting in a chair – well, more curled up like a ball in the chair – red-faced, and sucking on his fingers. Perhaps three teachers are trying to talk to him as I walk in. The head teacher asks him something and he starts to cry again. Well, right away I can tell that he is just stressed out and needs a break, so I say, “Come here and have a hug, Drew,” and he comes and wraps me up. The teachers – who are all good folks – proceed to tell me that he just went off and wouldn’t chill out. Eventually I’m able to determine the following:

1. Drew took one of his cheap little metal airplanes in to daycare. He is normally territorial about his toys, but he got the airplanes for his birthday as part of a cool aircraft carrier set
2. Matthew, one of his usual friends, tried to grab the plane from Drew and ended up pulling the front wheels off. I can see this scene in my mind’s eye. Ordinarily, Drew would probably scream or otherwise get upset, but this apparently set him off big time.
3. The teacher(s) tried to mitigate the situation or to get him to relax or whatever, and he would have none of it. He has a very severe sense of JUSTICE and he was the wronged party!!! But then he started kicking at the teachers, which is a big no-no.

Well, he said he was sorry to the teacher and seemed genuinely contrite as we rode home. He took a long nap and seems okay now. We gave him long talks about the kicking part, but I wish there was some way to instill some better reactions if/when kids try to take “his stuff.” In a way, I wish he’d just get a little physical with the other aggressive kid rather than going ballistic.

This thread is like a huge comedy routine, great stuff.

Hi my name is Bea-Arthurs Hip and I am a parent.

I am in need of desperate help! We have two girls . Clare is three and is an absolute angel; if all kids were like her I would take all the kids God threw my way.

My problem is not Clare. My problem is our 1 1/2 year old Theresa. Let me begin with our "baby". My wife had to go in for a somewhat risky surgery to have one of her ovaries removed when Theresa was 5 months old in the womb which went off with out a hitch. Then after a somewhat traumatic delivery everything was fine as all involved were healthy.

Fast forward a month and for some unknown reason Theresa has not stopped crying. I think to myself, "strange I don’t remember Clare crying this much". So wife and I figure it is normal and Clare must have been like this also.

Fast forward to the second month and for some odd reason Theresa still has not stopped crying. To make things real fun now she is not sleeping. This creates a very pleasant husband-wife situation. We are at each other’s throats constantly all the while Theresa is pissed off at the world.

Fast forward to month three - Theresa obviously does not like her parents. She will not sleep; she never stops crying and now seems to have developed a rash from hell. At this point I deeply consider driving off a bridge somewhere, as it is very frustrating to have zero control over this poor little child...We go in for her three-month appointment and they tell us she has Colic (sp??). Well kick me in the nuts and call me Sam. Really?? You think doc??

Fast forward to month four - Theresa is getting a little better as we get her on some $oy formula (away from brea$t feeding). Then my wife calls me at work one day:

Hip: "hi honey"
Wife: "hi"
Hip: "everything ok?"
Wife: "no"
Hip: "what is it, need me to come home?"
Wife: " I have post pardom depression?"
Hip: "ok"
Wife: " see you when you get home and be prepared for 13 months of
Complete and utter hell as I am going to be mean and nasty. And don’t forget about our 1 1/2 year old who is mean and nasty, oh yeah our three old also who needs attention constantly"

(The above of course did not happen through a phone call but it is a summary of the past 13 months)

Fast forward to November - I would never wish what my wife went through on any woman (or husband for that matter). I also would not wish the curse of colic on any child (or parent for that matter). ....Wife is doing much much better. She is seeing a doctor and is on medication. Theresa also is doing a little better but she still throws fits over everything. When I say fits I mean like the ones you see kids on Nanny 911 or Super Nanny throw.


Theresa is loving and plays well; she loves her sister and animals. But when she gets angry, look out!

My question to the group, have any of you had a colicky baby? Did they after growing out of it and develop temper problems? Will it ever end?

From a Dad-Husband who has shouldered financial problems, depressed wife, many immediate family crisis and of course my own day to day problems.

Help Me

bea,

my daughter was the sweetest little thing. She slept through the night at two weeks, would smile at us when she work up in the morning, and was generally a gift from above. She is now 3, and has been kicked out of one daycare, has meltdowns at least once per day, has started calling mom and dad a "blockhead", and likes to eat her art projects.

I think perhaps the inverse could be true for you (read: your daughter will be fine) :)

Hey buddy, although my experience was not as bad, I feel your pain. There were times when I felt so pushed to the limit of patience and endurance. I'd pick up the phone at work, and my wife would be borderline hysterical on the phone. Poor thing, it wasn't her fault, but it was so exasperating not to be able to DO anything about it. It was such a feeling of impotency.

Then there were Drew's crying fits, what we called "wildcats." He was not "colicky" by definition, I guess, but he sure pushed us to the brink with those periods.

All I've read and heard and experienced, however, suggests that it WILL be okay for you. Hang in there and find ways to ease your situation (both you and your wife). Allow yourself to feel crappy about it sometimes, and don't beat yourself up. This is a fire that burns you and shapes you as a parent. Be strong and you'll emerge stronger from it. I know that sounds silly, but I really do believe it.

Oh goodness, you have my deepest sympathy.

Been there, done that, damned near didn't survive it.

The best line I heard on the subject went something like this: There are two kinds of parents: those who've had a child with colic & those without. Here's how you tell them apart, when you mention that your baby has colic, you'll get one of two responses:
Those who've never been through it say "Oh, that's too bad"
Those who HAVE been through it say "Oh God is there anything we can do to help?"

Yes, I promise, it DOES end (just never soon enough). And no, it does NOT predict future behavior. Amazing as it may seem to those who know me, my son is one of the kindest, gentlest, most "people-pleasing" oriented people I've ever seen ... after three months of the living hell that is colic.

I've got to run out to dinner now, but I'll try to pass back through the thread with a few tips/tricks (99.9% of which won't work unfortunately) & any other support I can offer, but I wanted to at least reassure you that, once the colic ends, you aren't living with a demonspawn or anything like that.

edit to add: By now you've probably gotten suggestions for every crazy colic home remedy known to man & beast alike. If your case is like ours, very little will work except time. For us, it was about a 3 month torture, starting from about a week old. How bad was it? (hoo boy, this could be a looooong list)

-- it was so bad that my wife & I actually fought for several days running over whose turn it was to go next door & pick up the neighbors mail while they were on vacation. That five minute chore was the only guaranteed quiet five minutes either of us knew existed & they were more precious than gold.

-- it was so bad that I checked the Atlanta phone book (white pages AND yellow pages) ... would you believe that there's not one single Gypsy listed in the whole freakin' phone book (borrowed from the old boogey-man story about "I'm gonna give you to the gypsies if you don't behave)

-- It was so bad that one night we drove around for nearly three hours, from 1am til 4am, after discovering that the motion of the car was about the only thing that brought relief to the baby & therefore ending the crying. As soon as the car was put in park, literally the instant, WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!.

-- It was so bad that a UPS deliveryman almost lost his life after ringing our doorbell around 4p one afternoon for a late delivery, waking up baby, mom, and dad & hitting the WTF-DO-YOU-WANT?!?!?! sweepstakes in the process.
If he were just a half-step slower, I'd have caught him by the throat as I tried to do. (from that day until the colic ended, a "Do Not Ring Bell - Sleeping Baby" sign was kept handy for posting on the front door)

Looking back, the thing that really doesn't sink in while its going on but that you think about later, is that the baby is pretty much in agony during the attacks (for us, that was a period from about sundown until just before sunrise). That doesn't make the screaming more tolerable, just maybe more understandable in hindsight.

Of all the countless tricks & tips we got, only a couple seemed to do much good.

1) Put a towel in the dryer, get it nice & warm (nearly hot), roll it up kinda like you would if you were making a pillow for yourself, and place it on the baby's tummy, applying just a little bit of pressure. For as long as the towel stays really warm, the combination of heat & pressure relieved the pain at least a little bit, enough to turn the screams down to fussing & whimpers. We spent quite a few nights running a virtual relay from the baby to the dryer.

2) The car thing was pretty successful, although it's pretty impractical to try to drive for hours on end, especially with the price of gas these days. We never found a really successful substitute for that motion, but maybe your luck might be better.

3) The thing that helped most for us was discovering that he had an extremely high iron level, abnormally high even for a newborn/infant. He was a formula baby 100% & today's pediatrician's are absolutely fanatical about loading as much iron as possible to infants. Luckily, we found one pedia that had experienced uber-iron levels in baby's before & when we switched to special low-iron formula, it reduced our problems by a good 20%. Didn't make the colic go away, but it did cut down on stomach problems that were contributing to his misery index.

Of all the suggestions we got, the worst one was probably "put the baby in a warm bath". That resulted in a transformation from a screaming baby to a wet screaming baby ... not a positive change, trust me.

Like I said at the beginning though, it does end, in our case, completely unexpectedly & out of the blue. It didn't taper off, no real change, just POOF, one day it was gone, no more "House That Dreaded Sundown" for us.
You'll make it, even if you don't really want to at times, you'll make it.
And it won't take long for the inevitable comparisons to Linda Blair to be relegated to nothing more than a horrifying memory.

The other day we were having dinner and our 4year old son Jackson said he had to go potty. We said ok and he started off, as soon as he turned the corner, he comes back, pokes his arouund the corner and yells "I WILL MAKE YOU PROUD!", then takes off to the bathroom. My wife and I were shocked and started laughing uncontrollably the rest of the night.

Looks like I'll be posting in this thread in 8 months:)

what a subtle way to pass on the news, you sneaky young dog! :D

Congratulations!!! (hoping I'm reading the news right)

FM

Thanks, we just found out Thursday night. Very happy, very nervous:)

Great news Vex! Thanks for sharing. It is going to change your life more than any single event in your life. Have fun!

I can tell you Bea that I have been there, and it was not fun at all. It was a very trying time for us. But I am happy to say that it does indeed end.

Zach our middle child had it horrible. He would cry for hours and hours, and I would be reduced to a trembling, crying mass that resembled a Jello Jiggler. He is one of the most well adjusted, kind hearted and socially outgoing 3 yr olds that I have ever seen. So don't worry about the long term effects of it. Just pray it ends.

We also went throught the PPD as well. My wife was miserable, and our situation was similar to yours. As soon as she started taking meds things improved, however it didn't really end until much later. It also seems to have made her more susceptible to depression in general, as we have to deal with her and seasonal affective disorder during the overcast winter months in Cincy.

I know the burden of shouldering the load, if you have seen any of my rescent posts here you will see what I am talking about and you are spot on. For us, as the years have moved on, I find that the challenges never diminish and that your sanity is brought into question. Just remember that if you don't take care of yourself your family may really struggle. Try and make sure that you are getting what you need too, so that you can continue to support your family. The early years are the hardest, and as your kids age, the pressure ever so slowly lifts.

Hang in there and PM me if you need to chat.

PM

Welcome to the club Vex ;)

Guys -All of you...You have no idea how much this has helped...I just came in from an afternoon of hell at the mall with the family. Ever since I got up I have had a feeling of being a failure. I felt like l have failed in rasing our children, failed in making my wife happy and failed in making myself a real father and husband..

But after coming in and taking a little dad time, I thought I will check and see if anyone has responded with anything. then I see the posts- Sachmo, WSUCougar, JonInMiddleGA, Pilot Man- alls I can say from one dad to anonther is thanks!!!..It is nice to talk to other men who love being dads-husbands and take this vocation serious.

Again all your advice (and painful stories) are great signs of hope for me.

I will continue to check and seek support and hopefully give some as well!


p.s little funny story - Last night I am carrying Clare up to bed last night after wrestling with her, of course I got her all wound up, and she says:
Clare - "dad yant to pway one more game".
hip - carrying clare, "time for bed sweety, we can play tomorrow"
Clare - "its weal yun and we can pway while you howd me"
hip - "ok, what is it"
Clare - "pee-pee game"
hip - "Clare-no!!!"
Clare - "hehehehe"

She proceeded to pee all over me, I of course hurry up and get her changed before mommy caught wind of this new game. I then explained to Clare that next time she plays this game we will have to make her start wearing diapers again. Clare told me she was sorry and she will never play that game again...Thank God


thanks again guy! :)

One more thing about colic.

A running vacuum cleaner. I have seen it work. Just turn it on.

Have you seen those beanbag aromatherapy relaxing bags that you can throw in the microwave and heat up? My wife has made some of those before. We used to heat one up and put it in bed just to warm the bed up, you can remove it or leave it.

There are more that we have tried, I'll ask my wife.

HA! We used the vacuum quite frequently. Also my wife's hair dryer. :redface:

Hello Bea, This is Pilot-Man's wife. I have some other suggestions for colic. Try Hyland's Teething Tablets, we can only get them at the health food store where we live now but they are all natural and you can give them once an hour. They help reduce the pain and make them sleep, a sleeping baby= happier mommy and daddy. The other thing that worked for us was simethicone drops and Mozart. I also used to carry the babies in a sling a lot when they were crying, i could have my hands free to make dinner or whatever at the same time. If your interested in the warming rice aromatherapy bags let PilotMan know. I'd be happy to make one for you.
I had PPd after both our second and third and It was really hard on our marriage, the main thing I remember is just feeling really helpless and alone. Try really hard to be patient because it takes a while to feel better, lots of hugs and reassurance that your not the only one this happens to helps too. Spending a little bit of time doing things just for her helps too I think. A manicure or massage or even a oppurtunity to go shopping by herself might perk things up. You have to take care of you before everybody else which feels impossible with small kids but is worth the effort, I swear it.
If Mrs. Bea would like a little Mommy-to-Mommy support PM can give you my email, sometimes talking to somebody who's been there helps. Sorry this is so long. Good Luck!

Hi Bea,
Can't say I know what it is like to have a colicy baby. My wife (ibnsgirl) and I are barely starting our family and we are on our first (Lucy-4 months).
I know when we first brought Lucy home from the hospital, she would go into these fits because we either weren't giving her enough formula or it was getting her constipated/gassy. The hospital kind of screwed us over when they pressured my wife into giving Lucy formula. ibnsgirl wanted to breatfeed. So, by giving Lucy formula, it gave Lucy nipple-confusion.
There were some long nights when ibnsgirl was up, or when I was up trying to calm her down. It made things a bit hard for us since techincally we are still new to the married life. Married 11 months and with a newborn. Granted we've already come 4 months now, but we're still working on it.
Lucy's a doll and great fun to be around. She's a big hoot when I'm able to get her talking or laughing, but she is definately a momma's girl. She can have fun with me, but only for so long, then it is like I want mom, I want mom now. It's a little frustrating since I also want to be able to settle her down, but sometimes it's best to leave it to the wife.
I know it is a learning process, and I have a long way to go. I can say that this group has helped a lot and is also giving me things to expect when as Lucy gets older.

Colic sucked. Our second daughter Mackenzie had it. Nothing worked. Even things like the car, the dryer, the vaccuum cleaner, etc., worked to quiet her down, but she never stayed asleep. The minute we tried to put her to sleep - bam, she was screaming again. In order for it to work, I would have had to sit in the laundry room for hours on end. Not going to happen.

She had it for about 3 months. She screamed from 8pm until 1am nearly every night. And then one night we realized we didn't have to get up to get her, and we've had no problems with her at all. In fact, she's so good about going to bed now, I almost think those 3 months were worth the trade off. Since she was about 6 months, all we've had to do is take her into her room, turn off the lights, and she reaches for the bed. Putting her to sleep is a 10 second exercise. It's amazing.

With the twins we had similar problems but it wasn't colic it was acid reflux. They ended up getting put on Baby Xantax and Regland (a medicine that helps breakdown baby food). Once we got that in their systems - no issues. Before that...my wife and I were Zombies from lack of sleep.

We drove over to Jacksonville this past weekend to see the Wiggles. The kids loved it. Caitlin, our 6-year old, wanted to wear the shirt we bought her at the concert, and I told her to save it and she could wear it at school today, and she says, "But the Wiggles are for babies!" And then they came out and she was dancing like a fool.

BTW, if any of you are going to see them soon, Greg wasn't there. He apparently had to leave the tour for double hernia surgery. They had a replacement who was very good - sounded just like Greg. It couldn't have been easy replacing the guy who sings lead on all the songs, but they pulled it off very well. We had great seats, too - 11th row on the floor. Not quite Judas Priest, but it was great for the kids.

Good luck to you with the Wiggles. That just happens to be where I draw the line. Even Barney is ok, but the Wiggles? Not in this lifetime. Glad to hear that your kids had fun though.

Yikes! The Wiggles Live ... thankfully, Will's interest in them was shortlived & faded before before they became a touring act.

I don't mind the Wiggles at all. Especially live, they put on a good show for the kids, but also throw a few things in for the parents. Yesterday Murray started playing Stairway to Heaven to tune his guitar. The first time we saw them, about 3 years ago, they did a segment where Captain Feathersword had to make up lyrics to go along with whatever songs the crowd yelled out, and they ended up playing and singing made up lyrics to Iron Man and Slim Shady, which was hilarious, actually.

Barney is ridiculous, though.

Thanks TonyR, I know the feeling about mommas girls. Our first daughter was attatched to her mom something fierce. But now three years later she is a daddys girl :) . Give it time.



PM's Wife - I printed this off and gave it to my wife, hopefully she will take you up on the PM thing. She has lots of friends and family but none of them have little babies or have gone through PPD, so they are not much help as they think it is no big deal...Little do they know :eek: ...Thanks again

Just a little bump. The wife is closing in on the one month countdown and I'd hate to see this thread disappear when I will need it desperately :)

Hi y'all!

I hardly even logged in for almost 3 weeks, so I'm just getting caught up on everything.

Congrats, vex! This is so exciting! :) A baby definitely changes everything, but the trip is worth it!

Bea -- As Tony said, Lucy was not colicky, but we have had our moments. Technically, Lucy is more of a "high-needs" baby in that she is very alert and active (read: draining at times), and knows what she wants but gets frustrated and can fall apart somewhat easily. As Tony also said, she is a riot, loves people (ok, just us but that will work itself out later), and learns very quickly.
Back to the point -- I have a question: am I to assum that your daughter isn’t suffering with colic still, but that you are anxious about her behavior? Just want to make sure that I am reading it correctly. :)

Kevin -- the last month was not all that easy, though I still think 24 hour sickness was worse. I know the holidays are upon us, and that is going to add stress/pressure to get everything done pre-baby. If we can help in any way, let us know.

Our 5 day trip to see the family went pretty darn well. I guess that the worst part was that Lucy's sleep schedule at night has been a bit out of whack since then.
Basically only Tony or I held her, so that dramatically reduced her crying. She really didn't have any meltdowns due to overtiredness either.
My relationship with the in-laws has suffered of late, but at least I don't think that this trip added anything to that. So all in all, a successful trip!! :)

I have a quick update on my oldest son. Last year about this time we were having difficulty with him in school so the county came in to test him. The tests indicated he might have Asperger's. We didn't agree with that assessment because he is much to personable at home, but we did admit that he had problems relating to his peers and that he didn't do well in big groups. We've since investigated sensory intergration issues, and there are definately some present, but they aren't the underlying cause of his problems.

Fast forward to the present. Brett (5 years old) is doing much better with his social skills, in fact most of him current problems revolve around keeping his hands to himself and stopping to listen to his teacher. We ran through a bad couple of weeks in early November so my wife and I (with the request of the teacher decided to get him tested). we contacted out pediatrician and he said we needed to see a Psychologist to get some testing and assessment done before we can proceed.

We received the test results yesterday and here is what we've learned:

1 - he is ADHD (which my wife and I knew all along) and that isn't surprising because I was diagnosed as ADHD and Cathy had ADHD traits as a child but was never diagnosed. Moreover, the doctor said he was even more hyper than most ADHD kids she deals with.

2 - he has some OCD issues around perfectionism (none of the OCD disorders like Jack Nicholson displayed in "As Good As It Gets" - nothing to that extent). His issues deal with wanted to do something perfectly or not at all and if he elects to do it - he doesn't want to stop until he is finished.

3 - his fine motor skills are lacking so it takes him longer to complete his work and his writing is little sloppy.

4- and this is the most important aspect and directly affects the 1st item listed above. He is extremely smart. He was given an age equivalency test (the results of which are transformed into an IQ). As a 5 year 3 month old child he registered as an 8 year 10 month old - which correlates to an IQ of 159 putting him over the 99.9 percentile. This creates major problems in ADHD because he becomes bored quickly with easy tasks (coloring etc.) and he has a hard time making friends because they don't understand him when he plays more complex games or he finds their pretending childish.

We aren't sure how we are going to handle this - but they have recommended medication to calm the ADHD down thus allowing him to control his boredom better. Plus we will be placing him in the gifted program ASAP.

I'll keep you guys posted. Thanks for listening.

well Breeze, these are good news, you at least know a bit more what you are dealing with here. That's some impressive stuff that they can tell this much about a kiddo's behaviour... Good luck with him!

FM

sounds a lot like my daughter.

Hey Satch,

We are meeting with Brett's teachers in a couple weeks to try and come up with a plan that will meet his needs in all areas. Basically, finding him contemporaries Mentaly, Physically, and Emotionally, and that won't be easy because his levels are so diverse. We are leaning towards a mentor from a higher grade, and the gifted program, but that won't solve everything. Since you mentioned that Brett sounds like your daughter, do you have any suggestions?

Actually, my daughter is younger than your son, so we are still working with her. Her councelor didn't diagnose her as ADD, but she does exhibit some of the signs. She is always moving from one task to another, and get's bored easily. Basically, some of the things that have helped were to remove the majority of her toys from the play area to keep her concentrated on one toy at a time, try to talk more softly and on her level when winding down for the evening, and positive reinforcement as often as possible while keeping negative attention to a minimum. My wife and I were trying a very hands on approach with her, but we are finding that establishing boundaries and letting her guide herself seems to work much better.

Quick "kids say the darndest things" update to keep this great thread on the front page.

At dinner the other night, Anthony(8 year old son) was taking his plate to the kitchen. I reminded him to put it in the sink and rinse it off. Oliegirl says "no the sink is full, just put it on the counter."

Anthony says "I'll do what mommy says since she's the boss." HMMMMM. I forget if the next comment came on his own or after we asked, but he then said "Richard is the assistant boss."

Oh well, its not like it isn't true ;)

yeah, for once he's not lying and he's telling at least part of the truth ;) :p

FM

Sounds like me... And I have the feeling that Lucy will battle with some of this, too.

Well, we have our meeting with the teachers today to go over our plan for Brett. Through our research we have decided to ask for a few things:

1. A Mentor - because he doesn't seem to relate to the other kids in his class (though he will play with them, he often comes home saying "None of the kids in my class like the things I like") and because he does seem to relate well to older kids we are going to ask for a period of time a couple times a week where a child from an older grade can spend time reading with him or working on math, etc.

2. Horizons (gifted class) - we are going to request he get placed in Horizons. This one shouldn't be an issue because his teachers have already indicated that he probably shoud go there. The only problem is the Teacher is going to have to be aware of the ADHD issue and be willing to show patience in keeping him on task (though I will admit - it isn't as hard if he's interested in the subject matter).

3. Allow him to sit in with an older class for a period of time each day and work on what they are working on.

4. Make sure he still attends PE and recess with the other 5 year olds. As much as he relates on a mental level with older kids, he obviously isn't physically ready to play sports with them and we don't want him to lose self esteem because he's never able to play when he goes to the play ground.

5. A suggestion from another Gifted teacher that my mom works with (my mom is also a gifted teacher) was to have him sit in with a 3rd grade gifted class. That her 3rd graders would take Brett under there wing, have a blast teaching him things and almost treat him like a mascot. This will subject Brett to more difficult subject matter, while also giving him a lot of attention, which is good for the self esteem. I don't hold out much hope for this one though.

I'll let you know what comes out of this.

One other good note. The psycholgist sent some forms home and to school for us and his teachers to fill out. When these forms were filled out last year (by the counties request - no psycologist involved) there was a strong indication from his teachers that he might be an Asperger's child. Her testing didn't show those tendancies, but she wasn't going to rule it out with out taking additional steps. The first of the steps were these forms. The results of which strongly indicate he isn't suffering from Asperger's - so she's now going to remove any references to the disorder in the formal document. :D

We had out meeting Friday and several things were accomplished. Here is what we are going to be doing with Brett for the rest of the school year.

1. He will attend a social skills class. This will help him deal with social settings better and they will work on his dealing with frustrations that build up from being unable to communicate affectively with class mates.

2. He will serve as a peer teacher, helping other students learn some of the things he already knows.

3. He will have a mentor from an older grade who will work with him on special assignments - giving him a mental peer to relate too and giving him more difficult work that he'll be able to focus on better. He'll also present his findings to the class each week.

4. He will have an adult mentor as well. Hopefully the horizon's teacher - thus allowing him to have exposure to the horizon's environment but not having to test for it (this eliminating the possibility that he gets distracted during the test and scores poorly. If he were to test for horizons and not pass, he would have to wait 2 years before testing again).

5. He will have new 1st grade skills introduced to him on a weekly basis and worksheets on those skills provided throughout the week. (currently worksheets have been given but not reviewed - only teaching of the first grade skills came from home - now he will actually be taught in the classroom the new work).

I'm sure there were some other consessions made, but I can't recall what they are. They will begin after the Christmas break. I'll keep you updated on how it works out. Who knows, maybe it will work well enough to work as a template for some of you who believe you may be facing the same issues.

As for medication? We'll be meeting with the Pediatrician to go over that option in early February.

Good stuff, Breeze. Sounds like good news overall, yes?

My son (age 4) has his daycare's holiday singing thing tonight. Last year that meant crying scared in the hallway and then later standing on stage laughing at his friends attempting to sing Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. What will this year bring?

He's also got another cough, likely a sinus infection, that keeps us awake most of the night. He is asthmatic, so it's always kind of torture for us.

Yes, this is great news, and I don't think I could have walked away from the meeting any happier. I really have to take my hat off to the specialist with the county school system. They are really open to ideas and willing to try and help us. One of the specialist got a little offended at the findings of the doctor. I think her pride was a bit hurt, because the doctor was more specific and at times criticle of the initial testing - but that's understandable and she didn't let it affect her decisions.

Now I'm just praying that it will work as well as I anticipate it will.

Here's how a 8 and a half year old's mind work when it comes to making christmas gift lists. Andrew had received this wonderful Lego catalog by mail and he knows my mother in law cannot afford some crazy expensive gift, even though she would like to spend a month a half eating rice only in order to do so, so he decided not to pick the one big DynoAttack lego set at $60. What did he pick instead? "Oh look grandma, you could me this one at $30 and that other at $30 too, that's not too bad, huh?" :D

He still believes in Santa too even though my mother in law keeps reporting to him about what she wasn't able to find in stores and what not... Kinda funny, I guess he's made up his mind that there may be a Santa somewhere, but it's may not be him who's really bringing all the toys home ;)

FM

Funny stuff, FM.

As Christmas approaches, my son has taken to saying "I want that!" and "I want those!" everytime he sees anything remotely cool on a toy commercial. We have a stock response, "Let's see what Santa brings," but I struggle with the greed thing a little bit. I'm sure it's normal for a 4-year-old, but still. YOU CAN'T HAVE EVERYTHING!

When I first moved in with Oliegirl and had no idea what the hell I was doing as a parent I watched her handle this kind of thing. The "I wants" on TV commercials were fine, but there were a few incedents where he had just gotten all his birthday presents and then would throw a fit or pout at the store when Oliegirl wouldn't buy him some $2 toy at Target that he *had* to have. That was a good time for the greed conversation :)


The last day of school is today for Anthony, I haven't heard him sound real excited about Christmas itself yet, though I know he's excited for the 2+ weeks off and all the cool things he gets to do with his mom while dad slaves away at work ;)

FM, that is too funny! :)

I hear ya, Cougar. It is really sad how commercial this season can get.

Of course, I'm not really sure how to handle the whole greed thing, since I'm a bad one to talk. I mean, I must be making up for living under a tight budget due to my chicken feed paychecks during my time in the workforce. When I say "wow, x would be nice to have," Tony says (more often than not), "if you want it, get it." Costco loves it when we go shopping!

Anyway, I guess we will cross that bridge (Christmas gifts for Lucy), when we get there. Right now, I think she would probably be most thrilled to get to play in the wrapping paper.

Alright, I have been reading but not participating as my advice isn't geared toward some of the areas.

What I need is some advice here....I want to avoid the have your kid checked out aspect, don't get me wrong, I just don't think he needs it.......yet.

Anyways, we have the new baby (4 months) and my son (5 years) is now the middle child. He has been replaced as what you would call the "baby" of the family. So he was used to getting spoiled majorly just to a little....Now I don't think this should have messed him up that much, but I am now dealing with...what I would call, him marking his territory.

The kid is peeing on everything....I kid you not, last night he peed under his bed...last week, it was on his floor, the other day all over the bathroom...

I am at wits end, I don't know what to do, other than last night, I had him clean his own mess up, and he wasn't to happy with it....

My opinion is that he's simply looking for attention. Perhaps going out of your way to include him in things related to the baby would help?

We already do this, I might step it up a bit.

Another thing I am starting to do is what I would call a date night for each kid. I take that specific kid out and either go bowling, miniature golf, movie, to the library, something that the specific kid wants to do, hoping that this will help with a lot of the issues we are experiencing.

That sounds like a very good idea. Granted ibnsgirl and I are only on our first, I think we both invision more. Let me know how this works out D.

^^ What Tony said. This is just a gut feeling (since I can't say that I have the experience to back it up), but I would definitely keep up the "help clean it up" part. I know it is faster to do it yourself, but the idea that this is not the best kind of quality time will probably get through faster.

Makes you wonder where some of this comes from.

Hey Dennis, this is just one of those things that you have to have patience with. Make him clean it up, and he should come out of it. Likely it is a transitory phase. I think the kids date night is a great idea.

My oldest went though a bed wetting phase whenever there was a big change in his life. Moving to a new place, siblings, it was just his response.


Hang in there.

We just moved my two Zach and Ean in a room together. It is not going to well. It's like a sleepover everynight and afternoon. I hope I can get back home before my wife packs her bags and leaves the kids.

On the job front.

We are voting on a proposal that takes away our retirement plan, and 401k funding. Takes away on average 17% of our pay. In the meantime we have already lost almost 15% of our fleet, and furloughed around 150 guys. To top that off, rumor has it, if we vote down this proposal (and there is a real possibility that could happen) the company will be liquidated. Not so fun. I am trying to keep it all in perspective.

Update,

He has stopped since I last wrote this....it was like the clean up helped...

I have been doing more with the kids and focusing on them more.

I have also accepted a new job, this will be a major re-adjustment for the family as I will be out on the road in big blocks, but less travel.

I have these major periods of no travel, which will keep me home and allow me to help out.

My wife is worried about being a single parent for 5 weeks at a time with the 3 kids, I might have her create an account to talk here, it might help her sanity.

Well, we just seperated our two, so I know how you feel with the sleepover thing.....I feel for you there. Best thing to do is sit the rules, and remove anything that will keep them awake from the room.

As for the job front, all I can say is ouch....but I will definately include you in our prayers.

Good luck to both of you(indoorsoccersim and pilotman) on the job related stuff, espicially where it has such an impact on your families. When I was single, I had a job that had me travelling a few times a month, sometimes on literally no notice at all(go in monday morning, and be asked if I can fly to boston in 3 hours, etc). I had a blast doing it then but with a family it would be pretty tough at times i imagine.

Dennis, Congrats on the new job and good luck with handling the traveling.
PM, I can't imagine what you or your family is going through. You'll remain in my thoughts and prayers.

As far as my job prospects, I'm still waiting to hear if I get the promotion I've been trying to get. The big thing about the promotion would be moving to somewhere I think would be a better place to raise my family. In anycase, I guess in this case, no news is neither good nor bad.

I can totally relate to her being worried about taking care of the kids while you are gone. I was a single mom to Anthony for 6 years. If she doesn't want to post here (or even if she does), and wants someone to talk to one on one, PM me and I'll give you my email addy, she can email me anytime!

I just discovered this thread... great idea WSU!

Antmeister and I have 2 beautiful children, Larissa is 5, and Landon is 21 months old (typical mom counting in months).

I'm too tired to think of any stories right now, but I'll say that Larissa is always thirsty for knowledge asking many, many questions. She seems to come to me most of the time and when I don't know how to answer one, I send her to Antmeister. He always comes up with a witty response.

At first, I was a bit worried that our son hadn't spoken any words. A lot of "words" that come out of his mouth are mostly jibberish, so I thought something was wrong with him. The other day I grabbed a diaper and said, "Landon, come here I need to change your diaper" and he came to me, lied down and put his chubby little legs up, ready to be changed. I was so happy because I knew he understood but I guess he just doesn't wish to speak yet.

Ahh... the joys of parenthood. I'll have to ask Antmeister to post what Larissa did to our fish tank... I would never do the story justice.

Ouch, PM! That's rough. You and your family are in our prayers.

Congratz, Dennis, on the job front! I can totally understand your wife's worries about being a part-time single parent. I don't know how parents in that situation all of the time do it. I'm even somewhat apprehensive about a little little two-week trip Tony has to take.

As for life with Lucy:
She has started to add "da-da" and "ma-ma" to her string of babble! Very cute! Interestingly, when she is happy and in a good mood, her babble is full of da-das, whereas when she is unhappy/tired/hungry/othwise needs something, then all she says is ma-moms. Who knew?

On a different note, Tony is going to have his hands full next week. Next Monday, I go in for thyroid surgery, which will require a 23 hour stay in the hospital afterward. To say the least, no one is looking forward to it.

As background, the right side of my thyroid inexplicably started retaining fluid when I was about 4 months pregnant. Of course, the doctors didn't want to mess with it then, but not removing it meant that it has had to be drained several (painful) times. Even though the fluid build-up slowed dramatically after Lucy was born, leaving it alone really isn't an option, as it effects my ability to swallow. Assuming all goes well and the pathology report comes back clean, then all I should expect is a sore neck and a raspy voice for a few days.

So anyway, we finally are on track to deal with that. I'm not exactly sure when they will allow visitors, but in any case, it will mark the longest time Lucy and I will be away from each other. For Tony it means that he will have full-time baby duty. As long as everyone can refrain from getting her too wound-up, it shouldn't be horribly bad. Still, we are all looking forward to its being over.

Thread seems to be dying off, so I thought I'd bump it with an update of my own.

Couple things...

1. I was out of town for a week and Drew had his first major case of Daddyitis. Lots of asking "Where's Daddy?" Nightmares on three consecutive nights during my absence (he hasn't had that many of those for months). Progressively more anxious the longer I was away. And a huge grin and hug when I came home. This was all a mixed thing for me to experience (good, in a way, but tough on my wife). He has been entirely a Mommy's boy up until now.

2. Drew had his first trip to the dentist on Saturday. It's a kid dentist place, which is great to begin with. But he did really good with the whole things, which is very encouraging. On the down side, he already has a cavity (ACK!) and will need a filling. He also has some staining on one of his front teeth, likely due to his asthma medication (inhaler). We'll see how that goes.

How's everyone else doing?