Parvus Caesar (Rank 2, Pain Unlimited) vs. Hornsmaniac (Rank 2, House Corax)

Weapons: Knife, Warhammer, Chains, Longsword

Purse: $25,000

Parvus Caesar meanders out to the stage at the paddocks. He looks to be in pretty good form. However, when Hornsmaniac comes out to the stage, you can tell he's ready for the fight. The odds don't shift, as the crowd still favors the presence of the knife in the ring. Today's guest host is Tony Danza. We only get A-list celebs at Thunderdome. The two fighters make their way towards their corners. Tony Danza takes the microphone. "Check me out in my new sitcom where I play a character named 'Tony'. The new series is called the 'The Brooklyn Brawler.' My character 'Tony' is an undereducated New Yorker who boxes. BEGIN!" Both men dart for the knife.

And Caesar slips coming out of his corner, so much so that he heads for another weapon. Caesar changes his direction and grabs the chains and circling ensues. Hornsmaniac is a little shy about the chains whirling about Caesar's head, but he pulls himself together and stabs low, then high. The misdirection doesnt' work on Caesar as he tries his one double feint. His attacks are just as futile.

Caesar tries an aggressive attack, but can't come close to Hornsmaniac with his strike. Horns counters, but still can't find a good angle to get around the chains. He stabs again quickly with the knife . . .

B-B-B-Bonzo. DEAD?!?!


NO!!!!

Caesar smacks Horns' hand with the chains. In an all-time Thunderdome moment, Caesar executes a phenomenal maneuver. The chains wrap around Horns' hand. With a quick tug on the chains, the knife comes loose and heads directly for Caesar's own body. With the grace of a cat, Caesar pulls the knife out of the air and poses for grandeur as his teeth glint with a broad smile. THE CROWD GOES WILD!

Curses! The death of Mr. T and Quikshot was supposed to finish the House of Four Fingers but T survived.

Suddenly finding himself without a weapon (and his opponent with two), Hornsmaniac dashes for the warhammer. Caesar swings the chains at his legs. The chains capture Horns' leg and in short moment, Caesar is on top of him with the knife. With a reverse grip on the knife, Caesar stabs down into Hornsmaniac's back. The knife plunges deep into Horns' back piercing a lung.

It's only a matter of time now. Hornmaniac tries to roll over to his back to get Caesar off of him, but Caesar is too quick and stays perched atop his fallen foe. Another quick stab pierces Horns' heart and Horns' body goes limp.

TWO MEN ENTER! ONE MAN LEAVES! TWO MEN ENTER! ONE MAN LEAVES!

Parvus Caesar has won the fight. He is promoted to Rank 3 and receives 2 prestige points. Torbjorg collects the sizable purse to add to his winnings and offers to teach Parvus another fighting style (Normal, Defensive, Aggressive, Misdirection). Parvus is uninjured and can fight at his own leisure. For the next 20 minutes, the stadium super screen replay TV shows the unbelievable maneuver that Parvus pulled out of his ass.

Godzillius Blitz II (Rank 2, Pain Unlimited) vs. Raven "The Imposter" Hawk (Rank 2, Malice Unchained)

Weapons: Spiked Club, Lead Pipe, Chainsaw, Axe

Purse: $25,000

Godzillius Blitz II looks to be in ridiculously good shape as he struts out on the stage. Raven Hawk looks to be in just as good of shape. Rumor has it that Raven "The Imposter" Hawk put up 190 lbs on the bench press during training this week. But who believes rumors? The fight goes off at 1:1 odds. The two men are led to their respective corners and Tony Danza takes the microphone. "The funny thing is my character's dad's name in the show is also 'Tony,' so I'm trying something new out. My character is actually 'Tony Jr.' It got confusing on stage because they'd keep saying 'Tony' and two people would answer. Huh-heh. BEGIN!" GB II goes for the spiked club - a favorite of the family - and Raven Hawk goes for the chainsaw.

Raven Hawk gets to the chainsaw and gives it a tug and the chainsaw begins purring. It appears as though the two men will begin circling, but GB II charges in and Raven Hawk goes defensive. Raven Hawk gets of the first shot as GB II charges, slices out a chunk of GB II's arm. GB II retaliates, but can't get a good attack in.

GB II swings aggressively again with the spiked club. The club catches a small piece of Raven Hawk's shoulder. Raven Hawk's return shot is easily turned away by the club. Both men exchange wiffs again. The focus in their eyes shows how good the two fighters are.

GB II begins to take another swing, but Raven Hawk uses his cunning to intercept the attack with one of his own. The chainsaw strikes off GB II's shoulder, opening a mid-sized cut. GB retaliates, but once again can't break Raven Hawk's guard.

GB II follows up quickly with another strike. This time GB II feints an overhead strike and lands the spiked club in Raven Hawk's midsection. The spikes are covered with blood as GB II rips them out. Raven Hawk maintains his concentration as he retaliates, but his swing falls short of its mark.

Again, Raven Hawk correctly anticipates his opponent's maneuver and is able to break in for a strike of his own. Unfortunately for Raven Hawk, his strike misses its mark. GB II follows in with a fancy maneuver from his stylization, bringing his club to overbear his opponent. Raven Hawk gets his block up in time, but the overbearing attack pushes the spikes of the club for his face. Raven Hawk finally passes the club by, coming out of it with only a scratch.

GB II takes the opportunity to swing again as Raven Hawk goes defensive. GB II deftly breaks Raven Hawk's guard and sticks the spiked club back in his belly. That shot brings Raven Hawk to one knee. GB II swings with a powerful overhead stroke . . .

But Raven Hawk manages to block and regain his feet, but his eyes begin to glaze over from blood loss. Raven Hawk swings, but can't get enough behind the swing to put a good attack on GB II. GB II counters with another forceful swing, which is turned to the side, but still nicks his opponent.

GB II, knowing his opponent is weak, swings hard, again looking for the kill. But Raven Hawk won't give up. He side steps yet another blow leaving some strength to counter. But GB II easily avoids the soft swing.

But it was a feint! The reverse swing catches GB II by surprise. GB II barely avoids a nasty chainsaw wound and gets nicked by the teeth. Raven Hawk continues to struggle and parries another blow. Once again his return is week.

The blood is pooling at Raven Hawk's feet and he can feel his own mortality starting to set in. He needs to make a move now, or forever rest in peace. He lashes out with the chainsaw and opens a huge wound on his opponents leg! The blood starts flowing and the two men drop to their knees exhausted.

GB II passes out first, but Raven Hawk doesn't have the strength to get over to finish off his foe. The match is called a DRAW! Doctors rush out to the field and are able to save both fighters lives. Neither fighter gets promoted, but both fighters receive 1 point of prestige. Both fighters are in critical condition and will not be able to fight until next season.

The crowd starts throwing their fruit roll-ups at the official and the doctors as they release a volley of "Boos!" into the air. Perhaps the next match will be better . . .

JAGus "mAd" MAXimus (Rank 4, Pain Unlimited) vs. Qwikshot (Rank 3, The House of Four Fingers)

Weapons: Longsword, Warhammer, Rapier, Spear

Two fan favorites have come to fight each other today. JAGus has it out for The House of Four Fingers after and incident earlier this season. It was discovered that Flynn, the owner of The House of Four Fingers bribed weapons officials to not fill the gas tank on the chainsaw. As the two walk the paddocks, neither looks to be in great form. The odds stay set at 7:5 in favor of JAGus.

The two fighters are led from the paddocks amidst the fan fare and the half-naked dancers out to their respective corners. The air is electric and both men pace nervously, kicking dirt here and there digging small holes with their feet. Finally, Tony Danza takes the microphone. "Are you ready to fight," Danza asks the fighters rhetorically. "BEGIN!" JAGus goes for the spear. Qwikshot goes for the Warhammer.

Both men get to their weapons and commence the circling procedure. It is Qwikshot who is first to act. He closes the gap cautiously and tries to evade the length of the spear. The attack is defensive, but lands square upon JAGus' shoulder! The crowd winces as the sound of cracking bones fills the stadium. JAGus falls backwards and drops the spear!

Can I upgrade my normal again? Will that do anything? How do these styles work, anyways?

SI

JAGus uses his experience to regain his feet quickly, but he still has a problem. He needs a weapon to use. His eyes turn to the rapier and he sprints towards it as he grabs his shoulder in pain. Qwik pursues and takes a swing just as JAGus grabs for the rapier. A heavy shot lands to JAGus' body, but JAGus rolls with the blow to minimize the damage. He doesn't lose his concentration and he is able to pick up the rapier.

JAGus turns and swings with the rapier, but Qwik slides outside the arc of the swing. Qwik returns a shot, but it is parried away by JAGus and his quick rapier. JAGus strikes again, but can't seem to get into range with the rapier. His shot falls short once again. Qwik swings hard with the warhammer and misses completely, falling off balance.

JAGus stabs with the rapier but only catches a small piece of his opponent. At the same time though, he uses his stylized expertise to remain in an advantageous position. He swings again. Moving off to the right as Qwikshot passes by, JAGus slips the rapier into Qwikshot's kidney. The resulting wound bleeds profusely. Qwikshot staggers forwards and drops to the ground, grasping his side, watching the world go hazy.

TWO MEN ENTER! ONE MAN LEAVES! TWO MEN ENTER! ONE MAN LEAVES!

JAGus takes the opportunity to taunt Flynn by sitting on his fallen opponent as he takes his last breath. Soon after Qwikshot expires, JAGus cuts off one of Qwikshot's fingers and holds it up to Flynn shouting, "One finger down, three to go! Then my collection will be complete!"

JAGus "mAd" MAXimus has won the fight. He is promoted to Rank 5. Torbjorg collects another purse and offers to teach JAGus yet another fighting style. JAGus' shoulder is in bad shape and he will be out of competition for the rest of the season, unless he hires Terrell Owens' doctors to release him early.

That's it for today. We'll have another auction on Thursday, so make sure to sign up. I will not be able to update the tables until later today. There were some good fights out there, but once again, Pain Unlimited is a locomotive that is hard to stop.

Sweet victory and another blow to the House of Four Fingers! Soon Flynn will be all that remains of his House and then he will have to fight me in Thunderdome. I will cut him to guppy-sized pieces and toss his fingers to the mangiest dogs I can find. Then my revenge on him will be complete.

Little Jeebie Dee, circle Week 1 of next season on the calendar if you still live. I will put an end to your life while I wait for a worthy HOFF candidate to kill.

JAGus will train defensive style again.

Damn you Qwikshot! Now who am I supposed to destroy?

Little Jeebie Dee opens the floor to all challengers. Who wishes to have a peice of the mighty little one?

dola-

Actually, does Mr T wish to die next week? I would enjoy ending his life as soon as it can be arranged...

Week 9 it is. And I train defensive, again.

Oh little fool, I'm gonna put you out of your misery and be the biggest road block in JAGus' mission, time to go A-Team on you Jeebie!

(I'm assuming the techniques that are taught by Flynn are non-selectable and cover a blanket set of skills?)

Your assumption is correct.

Well Jeebie, I promise you this. If you kill off the final member of the House of Four Fingers for me (assuming he can't buy another auctionee with his Mr. T prize money), I'll make your death a quick and honorable one as thanks.

Another one bites the dust...

Next up:
King IV
Warhammer

Sooner or later I have to win. right?

You just wouldn't let RH die, eh? :)

Good call.

Louis did say he would have ze little monkee for breakfast...Ah AH AH!

ouch, zat knee hurts.. yes, nurse, a little lower...ah oui, zat is so much better...

Not quite the idea here. Actually GB II was the one that benefited more from the draw. I just couldn't let such a good battle end with two people bleeding to death in the arena.

Here is a rough idea of how styles work.

All fighters know how to use all styles, however, some are better than others (if they train it) in particular styles. Each style trumps one other style. At the beginning of each round, each fighter declares a style. If a fighter's chosen style trumps the style of his opponent, he gets a bonus for that round. The higher you have a style trained, the bigger the bonus.

Aggressive > Normal
Normal > Defensive
Defensive > Misdirection
Misdirecton > Aggressive

So if Fighter A chooses to fight Aggressive in the round and his opponent, Fighter B, chooses to fight Normal, Fighter A gets the "Aggressive" bonus for his attack and his defense for the round. If Fighter A happens to be trained in that bonus, the bonus is larger.

There is roughly a 25% chance in each round that your player will get a bonus. There is a 6.25% chance that each particular bonus will come up for you in each round. A good example was in JAGus' fight where the Normal Style pretty much won the match for him. He was getting pummeled pretty bad by Qwikshot, but then the Normal bonus (which he has trained up twice) kicked in and he was able to land a critical shot and end the fight.

I'll do a bigger write up of all the training effects for Season 2.

Oh. Then Fattoe would like to train Misdirection, then. :D

Sign up below by entering your:

Slave Name:Hakim Warrick
Favorite Weapon:Chains
Stable Preference: Bloodhaus

Just for clarification, I already have Fattoe having trained Normal, Defensive and Aggressive. Seeing as he has won three fights and has not gotten 5 prestige points (He's fought against Rank 1 fighters in all three), he's not eligible for any new training. Unless one of the prior trainings isn't correct.

Ok, Parvus Caesar will pick Aggressive

SI

Current House Standings:

House Name	W	L	Win %	Cash
Pain Unlimited	15	3	0.83	$203,500.00
Malice Unchained	7	7	0.50	$59,500.00
House Corax	6	7	0.46	$18,500.00
The House of Four Fingers	4	9	0.31	$29,500.00
Bloodhaus	4	11	0.27	$13,000.00

Parvus Caesar would like to fight this week but everyone his rank or higher is challenged :(

SI

Just out of curiosity, does that mean that style bonuses from training only kick in if one of the advantage situations show up? For example, JAGus trained normal twice and uses normal, but his opponent uses aggressive. There's no bonus for JAGus using normal in that case and in fact his opponent gets a small bonus which would've been higher if he had trained aggressive. Is that right?

I noticed that this isn't scheduled yet for week 9, RH. Just wanted to make sure that you saw it... :)

I did forget to mention one other thing. It is also used to negate your opponents bonuses against you. So if JAGus was fighting Normal and his opponent was fighting Aggressive, it would effectively reduce or cancel opponent's bonus for having the right fighting style. However if his opponent was fighting using Misdirection, the skill would not be used whatsoever.

However, that will play second fiddle to the Maaiiiinnnn Evennnnnt.

Erik Flamebeard of the Neither Here Nor There vs Fattoe the Dead!

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